...circle circle, dot dot

[sadpenguin]

This one is an easy one. I played Zelda from the time I woke up until a few minutes ago. I quit after recieving the dame musical tune player of time thing. The Ocarina of Time. It's like, damn... when does this game end. I get through all this shit, and now I have more confusing shit. It is about seven o'clock now. Not much to talk about. The clocks were switched back an hour today. Woopie. I am all out of clariton. great. Watch as I suffer cold-heartedly from allergies. I have had the biggest craving for food other than toast, chex cereal,a nd rice lately. Is that normal? Maybe I can get Mother to surprise me with McDonalds or a pizza or some shit. She works to much though. The male parental unit has gone to the hospital because he almost died of pnemonia(sp). I believe the R.U.G. went to visit him today. What a guy. The dreams have not subsided yet. I don't know why. I would say it is do to dwelling, but I stopped long before these fucking dreams... maybe nightmares. I still don;t know what has been wrong with me. I think i am just disspointed in humanity or something. Why the fuck should I even care? That is soo stupid. I just hate people in general. Mother constantly nags on me because I "shouldn't be on medication" and how medication shouldn't be used. WHAT THE FUCK?! This is the dsame woman that cant get up in the mporning and function with out putting a huge blind fold over her eyes to blind herself from the world and what is going one... this women cant function without the illegal use of WEED! NOW SHE IS TWLLING ME THAT I SHOULD NOT FUCKING BE ON MEDICATION AND IT IS WRONG? That is the biggest hypocrite-like thing to say. Doesn't matter. Cross my heart and hope to die: I have NEVER in my life met an honest post smoker, never. They are honest at first before they start smoking pot, but then the ditching, the backstabbing, the dissapointing, and everything... then they are lost. Alone in their own little world where they are blinded and can never see reality. Their mind changes too. They start agreeing with different people, they change their views on things, musical prefferences change, and they have to own anything with a weed plant on it. It actually humors me in a way. But these are people, Mother is a person. They are like conforming whores. Clones. Mechanical fucking clones. MECHANICAL ANIMALS. Their is however, one hope. Kev. He has been trying to stop for a while. He hasn't been able to get over the with-drawl parts in time for work, so then he has to start again. He really wishes he could stop. He may have anerexia though, i believe. He throws up alot and is rather skinny. The weed helps his problem. At least he knows the negatives and all that shit and wants to stop. i am proud. SOMA! HOLY SHIT! Has anyone read brave New World. Soma is sooo the equivilant to weed. In the book, literally everyone takes a pill called some whenever they feel any negative type emotions, in the least bit. They take it when they are confused and such too and it works right away. When you take to much, you go really out of it, and you could die. Kind of sounds like our world. Must get stoned *beep beep* system faulure. It just... I dont know. It shocks me how stupid people are and then how they make themselves even more stupid. Im staying Straight Edge for the rest of my life. Frankly, I am better off and I know this becasue I have done that shit before. I am going to be somebody. Okay, I wrote a song that I feel everyone can probably relate to and I wrote another one that probably every guy can relate too. I am going to put one of them in another post though.

Circle Circle, Dot Dot

Inside I cry
There is no longer a way out
Laughing now
You felt me as the time
Slipped through my index finger

I cry
But you do not want to listen
I give you toy soldiers
To bribe the sensation
Out of you
Just play here
With me

A box of sand
An old plastic shovel
That we used
To make motes
Around our castles
Oh so long I waited
Even though these feelings
Never faded
What were they?
I did not know
We were too young
We were too young

Cooties are nothing
But theatrical humor to me
We are older
I have grown up
And now you are close
NOW you are close
Too close for us to be a puzzle
Successfully put together over time

-x-billy-x- 2003