...fell asleep
Well, my friends and I are starting to finally notice the change in my personality due to my new medication. I cannot really explain it. I zone out ALOT and sometimes I jusy seem stoned or high. But then suddenly I will change and be all gitty and shit. So it is obviously making manic or bi-polar. I like being manic though. So we will see how things goo. I just really space out alot now.
School was Okay. English was stressful, Comp I will get back to you after this, Wood working actually wasn't bad. People actually talk to me and shit so i made a few aquantences. Instrumentals was fun as always... Christ is awsome. Economics was.... I will gte back on that too.
Okay, So Computer class. As you know, it is quite boring. I don't know if it is because my new meds or not... but i just said fuck it. I have gave up 45 minutes of note taking completly. It is actually funny because I still hav eto pretend I am taking notes.... So I just write random shit: "Hmmm, I can't wait for slayer. My tummy hurts. Sex sex sex". I am not totally giving up. i am still willing to do the reports and essays. I am just sick of fucking notes. MR. Hullic. However you spell his name, He is my economics teacher. He is sooo fucking cool!. His wife listens to techno and he is pretty diverse as well. He wants to exchange music sometimes. He is really nice and he comes up to me alot in the halls and such just to chat. He is a nice man.
After school I tried to sit an ddo homework, but i kept falling asleep. I wemnt over Rays (ray is cool MOUSE MAT!) house and cleaned his room. We also put together a bed. We did a few little stuff here and there and then I came home and here I am. I need to pee.
Okay. So I really wish I had a car. I am missing out on alot. Sandwich chicks here suck, i know so many non cape-cod chicks that I could date if I had a car. It just pisses me off. You talk to someone online and you think "wow, this person is great. Seems like someone I could date". But you have only met them once if at all and you would never be able to see them anyways. I will get a car soon enough. Then Christ and I are going to go walk the streets of hyannis and shit. Also, college will bring me new opportunities. I want to date, I just don't want a relationship unless I am sure and it is almost perfect. No mistakes this time. But dating is cool I guess. Again, it would be easier if I had my car. Blar. So I don't know what else to say. I usually write these offline and then post them later. For some reason, I get the feeling that i am going to have yet another unwanted comment in my journal. I hope it isn't at least an annonyomous one. those are the worse. With my new meds though, I seem to be letting things go more easier. Like, you wouldn't believe the sarcastic marks that I want to make right now or have wanted to in the past. I am doing a good job in limiting them. OI know it doesn't seem so, but trust me. I write them, then delete them after thinking twice. Because it just doesn't help really. As much as you want to prove your opinions right or whatever... maybe just to be an asshole... things will never end otherwise. YOu will say something, then someone wills ay something back and it will keep repeating until someone stops and then eventually the other. THough, Their has been cases where the one person stops, but the other doesn't. i don't know if it has ever happened to me... but i know people. i don't know what else tro say. Everything is the same old stuff. Band is doing good, just having recording troubles. I feel bad now though that my giving streak has declined. Like I was doing good at just caring about others, even total strangers. Simple stuff like leaving good tips, holding doors, and just giving random people a hug when i bump into them (heh, remember that?). But lately... I don;t know. I still try, but it is getting harder to do things when I myself have problems. I am fairly broke and if i recieve a dollar... i ask myself "give it away, or keep it to buy a lunch or soemthing". You know? It is just hard. But I have been doing what i can. I try to ask how peoples days are more often too now. I know alot of times I can go on and on about myself, but that is something I am trying to help. I don't know. So, I think this entry is fairly sarcasm free so far. That is the first. (heh, sorry, I had to do that). I don't know... hmm. I don't know if I am having more of a problem finding a job, or being able to stay awake to have a job. I am going to call kev. Tomorrow is band practice. i guess glen can't make it. I am so lagging behindin English class, I have 2 large assignments due next week. Shit. I have to read. [8:20]