[Frank Archer was not expecting to wake up in a strange room this morning. He wasn't expecting it to be cold outside, and he certainly wasn't expecting to find a strange bat inside the red-and-white ball sitting on top of the nightstand beside the bed he woke up in. It's been nearly a day since that happened, and he's been spending his time getting
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Your gun is gone. There aren't any weapons here, so use your new pet bat to help you.
I don't know if you're a State Alchemist or not, but alchemy doesn't work here either, just as a heads up.
[And now he's just going to watch your progress there with that Spearow you found. they're nasty little buggers.]
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Don't mock me, FullMetal. [The response is tight, anger scarcely controlled.] You know I'm not an alchemist. [But he dismisses it quickly, moving on to more pressing matters.] Where are we and how did we get here?
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We're in a place called Johto and I have no idea how we got here or how we're supposed to get back to Amestris. Happy?
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[Wait, hold on. That's not possible. He just saw you! You just warned him not to go into that city because it was a trap! It was, but that's not the point!]
How can you not know who I am? We spoke before the array was activated in Liore. If you're attempting to be funny, Major, I can assure you it's not working.
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And what the hell was this guy going on about?]
What the hell are you talking about? I haven't been to Liore in months. I went to look for a Philosopher's Stone but it was a fake.
I can say the same thing about you...
[Hold on, he's squinting his eyes...]
Colonel.
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[Edward should know this. The fact that he doesn't is troublesome at best.]
You don't recall any of this?
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The last thing I recall, Colonel, was being stuck up in Briggs with the Crimson Alchemist. This place likes to screw around with time. Col- I mean General Mustang is here too, though he's from a time where he somehow got that promotion.
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[--Wait. What was that?] ...The Crimson Alchemist? [And the entire conversation was derailed! Congrats!] What was he doing in Briggs? [...Well, at least until you mentioned Mustang, now the conversation's been derailed again.] General Mustang? [Whatever screwed up version of Amestris you're from, it's all sorts of wrong. How dare they promote Mustang!]
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Yeah, it surprised me too. I don't even know how he made it to Colonel, let alone how he got that promotion.
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...I suppose he must have started working harder. [He can't exactly say anything about how much this pisses him off, especially not to FullMetal. They are close, after all.]
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The fact that there is no similarities in their memories is still bugging him though. He knows people are pulled here from different worlds, but could there be different versions to those worlds?]
Can I ask how and when you met me? You seem to know a lot about me, but I swear I've never even heard of you.
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[The question catches him off-guard for a moment and Archer looks momentarily surprised before answering.] We hadn't spoken to one another prior to meeting in Dublith. I was sent to the area to ask you about the incident at Laboratory Five along with Major Armstrong. There were some... complications involving some escaped chimeras, a former State Alchemist, and a... [He pauses for a fraction of a second - is this really something he should be divulging to Edward?] ...A Homunculus. We were never able to get confirmation of your report on Lab Five due to the circumstances.
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[He pauses for a moment.]
I've got a hypothesis for this, but it might sound pretty crazy to you since you're new here.
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[Ed pauses for a bit.]
And don't feel the need to call me crazy. Just saying that makes me feel ridiculous.
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I certainly don't blame you. It sounds impossible. [Unfortunately, it's the only explanation that would make any sort of sense at the moment.]
[This is definitely some kind of screwed up dream.]
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