(no subject)
They promised me there was a way to be good again; like the white robes of heaven replacing the crimson stains of this life. They promised me there was something hidden there in the pages of those history novels, and fantasies to tell children so they could sleep better at night, but i cant find it. Ive read it over and over and sat through hundreds, maybe thousands of church services. And hours and hours of talking with pastors and praying and hoping there would be a magic pill to make it go away, like in the Giver, by Louis Lowry, or maybe just maybe a southern gentleman would show up and remind me there were decent citizens still.
But empty promises whisper from hope-filled dillusionists. I once was one too. I wanted to believe we could all be good. That God's plan was for everyone to be good and stay good and fall in love with Him.
But it wasnt.
Gods plan was for people to choose Him; to create a race that would have free will. And as the Good Book says, who is the pot to critisize the potter for how it is made. Religious society I was involved with told me that meant some people were made to be prophets, teachers, preachers, mothers, bankers, etc. But i dont see that at all. The Book says "who are you to critisize if some are made for noble purposes and some as garbage containers?" Maybe that meant God knew some of us would simply absorb sin. That we would soak in both mortal and immortal sin. and while maybe He is a benevolent God, He knew that. He knew some of us would live in hell on earth knowing our days were dreary because we let down an immortal, perfect God who believed in us. And He knew some of us would give up on ourselves because our flesh always wins. And the Bible doesnt say "those who try to have perfect lives will live forever"; it says "if you believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, confess with your mouth, and believe in your heart, you will be saved." It later explains Christians are to be like Christ, who was perfect through the power of God in Him, which He left for us in the form of the Holy Spirit (be ye perfect as my Father in heaven is perfect), which makes it pretty clear as far as I can see, that repetitious sin is not tolerated. For example when Christ said to the slut at the well: go and sin no more, or to the adulteress something similar. Real christianity is like politics, one cant give lip service to doing good and go off allowing murder in Darfur and/or aiding rebels in Colombia who are killing the citizens. Its an unhealthy double standard. If the Bible is in fact the inspired, perfect Word of God, then God says something similar in the gospels: "one cant love both God and money". Gods plan was for people to love Him, which means to obey Him according to the Bible. That means not sinning.
Its written in both the Old and New Testaments, which in Hebrew actually means "covenant", not testament. The Old covenant was follow Gods laws and rules or make sacrifices for the broken ones. That covenant became obsolete not because Christ told the Church (at least not in the Bible) to not follow it, in fact, He obeyed it too. Christ said He came to fulfill the Covenant, not to abolish it. Meaning He was the sacrifice for all mankind, but the Covenant means allowing Christ to "work" in you. Which means not sinning. And actually feeling sorry when you do. And stopping. And not doing it again. Not like training a puppy, who pees on the floor the first few months and looks sorry, but still does it. No, God asks for everything. Its a fair trade; He gave everything.
So for those of us who didnt give everything, for those of us who tried and gave up, for those of us who sold our souls for violins in Georgia, for those of us who thought just a little while on that long black train wouldnt hurt us, wouldnt change us, wouldnt strain us... we were wrong.
God asked something simple: love like He did.
Some of us cant.
The church tries to tell me there is a way to be clean, a way to be good again. They tell me my heart is resisiting. I tell them God gave Pharoah time, then God hardened Pharoah's heart. Maybe he hardened mine.
Maybe Im sacriligious. Maybe Im blasphemous. Maybe Im the most confused ex-Bible patriot. But religion cant pick and chose what is right and wrong. Just like the mormons are critisized for changing their rules: for awhile blacks were going to hell, for awhile polygammy was okay. Now its not. Christians have changed the "interpretation" on the Word so many times history makes me sick with it.
If truth is truth, its truth. If Christ is God and God is unchanging, and Christ is the way and the Truth and the life, there's a huge ol problem with the church, now isnt there? Every generation thinks they are the chosen generation who hears from God.... i think perhaps they make that up like tort lawyers. and drumb up a bunch of support in churches for it.
what about miracles?
Im so confused.
But empty promises whisper from hope-filled dillusionists. I once was one too. I wanted to believe we could all be good. That God's plan was for everyone to be good and stay good and fall in love with Him.
But it wasnt.
Gods plan was for people to choose Him; to create a race that would have free will. And as the Good Book says, who is the pot to critisize the potter for how it is made. Religious society I was involved with told me that meant some people were made to be prophets, teachers, preachers, mothers, bankers, etc. But i dont see that at all. The Book says "who are you to critisize if some are made for noble purposes and some as garbage containers?" Maybe that meant God knew some of us would simply absorb sin. That we would soak in both mortal and immortal sin. and while maybe He is a benevolent God, He knew that. He knew some of us would live in hell on earth knowing our days were dreary because we let down an immortal, perfect God who believed in us. And He knew some of us would give up on ourselves because our flesh always wins. And the Bible doesnt say "those who try to have perfect lives will live forever"; it says "if you believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, confess with your mouth, and believe in your heart, you will be saved." It later explains Christians are to be like Christ, who was perfect through the power of God in Him, which He left for us in the form of the Holy Spirit (be ye perfect as my Father in heaven is perfect), which makes it pretty clear as far as I can see, that repetitious sin is not tolerated. For example when Christ said to the slut at the well: go and sin no more, or to the adulteress something similar. Real christianity is like politics, one cant give lip service to doing good and go off allowing murder in Darfur and/or aiding rebels in Colombia who are killing the citizens. Its an unhealthy double standard. If the Bible is in fact the inspired, perfect Word of God, then God says something similar in the gospels: "one cant love both God and money". Gods plan was for people to love Him, which means to obey Him according to the Bible. That means not sinning.
Its written in both the Old and New Testaments, which in Hebrew actually means "covenant", not testament. The Old covenant was follow Gods laws and rules or make sacrifices for the broken ones. That covenant became obsolete not because Christ told the Church (at least not in the Bible) to not follow it, in fact, He obeyed it too. Christ said He came to fulfill the Covenant, not to abolish it. Meaning He was the sacrifice for all mankind, but the Covenant means allowing Christ to "work" in you. Which means not sinning. And actually feeling sorry when you do. And stopping. And not doing it again. Not like training a puppy, who pees on the floor the first few months and looks sorry, but still does it. No, God asks for everything. Its a fair trade; He gave everything.
So for those of us who didnt give everything, for those of us who tried and gave up, for those of us who sold our souls for violins in Georgia, for those of us who thought just a little while on that long black train wouldnt hurt us, wouldnt change us, wouldnt strain us... we were wrong.
God asked something simple: love like He did.
Some of us cant.
The church tries to tell me there is a way to be clean, a way to be good again. They tell me my heart is resisiting. I tell them God gave Pharoah time, then God hardened Pharoah's heart. Maybe he hardened mine.
Maybe Im sacriligious. Maybe Im blasphemous. Maybe Im the most confused ex-Bible patriot. But religion cant pick and chose what is right and wrong. Just like the mormons are critisized for changing their rules: for awhile blacks were going to hell, for awhile polygammy was okay. Now its not. Christians have changed the "interpretation" on the Word so many times history makes me sick with it.
If truth is truth, its truth. If Christ is God and God is unchanging, and Christ is the way and the Truth and the life, there's a huge ol problem with the church, now isnt there? Every generation thinks they are the chosen generation who hears from God.... i think perhaps they make that up like tort lawyers. and drumb up a bunch of support in churches for it.
what about miracles?
Im so confused.