KILL THEM ALL...KILL THE FRIENDS PAGES!!! THEN CONFUSE THEM 'TILL THEY PUKE!!!!!!!
8-21-05
I have to say it again, camping has a certain energy about it. I’m on my way back from Camp Fiesta Island in San Diego. I got my monthly quota of camping in and I’m more than ready to face the coming week. There’s an almost imperceptible bit of stress building up in my life right now but it feels so trivial right now, almost as if it were taken care of…..
I need a job. However, I should be in good shape because, as usual, the Scouts have come through for me. Several of the adult leaders in my Venture Crew have stepped forward to give their advice and offer contacts. I’m thinking of applying at the local paper, Sam’s, a T.V. station, and there might be one other thing.
In other matters, my initially expressed loneliness may have been premature. That anxiety expressed earlier in the week existed in everyone at first. I can see that clearly now. Also, I’ve even made a couple of new friends. So there can only be one conclusion to these statements…TOMMY PARTY! Invites start Monday. I’m doing this one right…
Moving back to camping, I saw one of the people I worked with at Mataguay working now as a ranger at CFI. It’s really a small world. It was interesting seeing him again because I got to get a post camp opinion on some things. This guy, Eric, is one of those staffers who has been there for six summers. Regardless of their experience numbers I call guys like him “seven year guys”. They’re committed to the rec business for the most part, and are incredible people. So, talking to one of these guys can be really interesting.
The camp we worked at had been on a downward slide for the last few years. I heard all of this from various older staffers as it was my first year at Mataguay. Apparently, there was a child molester. Tha got caught at the camp a few years back. He was under their employ at the time and, naturally, this is very bad PR. That was strike one. In 2003, a camp director named Mary Beth took over and changed everything about the traditional camp program. That was strike two. Last year, there was a fire. Strike three. This is the camp I came into, a broken camp and a struggling organization. Attendance was down 75%, camp equipment was for the most part, broken, staff morale was zilch, and we were mostly operating on a skeleton staff. This story does not end with me as the redeeming hero. However, these conditions affected my performance in that I had to try to make Mataguay what it used to be, if only in my area.
I was director of Pathfinders, the Mataguay equivalent of the Trail to First Class program. I didn’t start out that way though. The first week of the three I was there I was a counselor for Pathfinders. Charlie Wilcox was my director and he trained me how to do the job. Come week two, that Sunday I was appointed director. It was one of those, “Hey, you’re director! You have a meeting in an hour!” Uh-huh. Thanx….
Now the big cheese for a bunch of eleven to twelve year old mice, I stumbled through that second week. I refused all offers to become someone’s training monkey and did a pretty good job. All this time, the camp began to fall apart. Various staffers began to quit and we dipped below that “skeleton staff” level, the minimum level of staff to run camp. A couple of scandals popped up (A disastrous medical drill) and also some actual medical emergencies.
….Then it rained.
Mudslides, need I say more?
Despite all of this, I ran my program exactly the same as I would under normal conditions. I pride myself on my “game face”. My kids always had a good class. That was week two.
Week three wasn’t really any better event-wise but we had 4 times as many scouts and a troop from Japan. To compare, we had a hundred kids the week before. So when Sunday of that week came around, the camp pulled out all the stops. We brought in former staff as volunteers and magically conjured up CITs. I swear they came out of thin air. I was, at this point, in good form with my directing and handled the week quite well.
There are enough stories for me to write another three pages on it but it boils down to this; I made a great director, something I had significant doubts in. I learned a lot more about Boy Scouts and politics. Finally, I reaffirmed that I really do love to teach. I wish I could pursue it as a career, and I might, but I fear that I couldn’t make a living doing it.
Well, I think that’s all I can get through right now. I can’t wait to get back to school. I can’t wait to figure out my position with the girls. And, I can’t wait to go get to work again……ugh…..a terrible ending paragraph….goodnight…
8-28-05
Ah, the week in review. I usually have more time to write but I ran out this week. Too much has been going on for me to keep note of. I will try to cover as much as I can here, and there’s a lot trust me….
To begin, school goes exceptionally well. In the course of one moment I went from a jaded, blasé, and burned out beginning of the year to a vibrant and alive correspondence with the present. I am moving on without my graduated friends and I finally finding the inexpressible, relentless purpose of the year *substitute for “day”*. I am acquiring some new friends and reestablishing ties with those friends that remain here.
Specifically, I am glad to know Patrick Hayes. The man doesn’t quit and neither do I. We have about a thousand harebrained schemes going at any one time and we constantly play off each others ideas. I don’t know where I’d be without some of the help I get from that guy. Conversely, I think I help keep Pat’s feet on the ground sometimes. It’s a............ profitable correspondence.
So what is really going on? I realize I haven’t really said much in these entries lately in order to keep them shorter but I have top catch up eventually. People on LJ were complaining that i wasn't actually saying anything. It's a problem i have but it's often a plea for me to get back to talking about people. So, to news.......... I had a party yesterday, today being Sunday. I’ve been looking for a job. I’ve been trying to get my classes in order at school. I finally talked to my parents about college and scholarships. Girls. End of sentence. I tore apart my room and it’s never been cleaner. I mean I spent about five hours cleaning/organizing it. I think that’s it. I’ll just have to attack this piece by piece.
To start, I had a party yesterday, a TOMMY party! It went exceptionally well but only after the addition of a few key people. It started at six and was an utter bomb ‘till eight. You see, there was this huge concert going on called the “Jesus Jam”. A lot of my usually attendees were there rocking out and I was left with a mostly new party crowd. To accentuate this lack of things to do, a couple of neighbors came over that, one, I’ve never met, two, were 19 and 21 years of age, and three, stared at us awkwardly for the better part of thirty minutes. That was a disaster. However, after this, I made a critical decision. Smaller parties in the past were made successful by getting everyone closer together. At the moment, everyone was spread out and alone. I invited everyone to chill in the hot tub and things picked up from there. On cue, several people arrived while we were just getting settled and you could just feel the energy returning to the group. You know, parties are great case studies and small group sociology….
So pictures were taken, people flirted, acted silly, and generally were able to act themselves. ************************* ***************************** ******************** ************************************ This was, of course, when I wasn’t trying to be a kick-ass party host.
Now, as the party wound down, more people came to visit and rides were arranged to get everyone home. (AND MORE DELETING....SORRY FOLKS)
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FOR LJ: Sorry guys, but as much as i'd like to mention my interest(s) on here.........some times i can't....it has certain, conesequences, i've become keenly aware of
So these are my interests and wanderings of the intellect.
Speaking of the intellect, it’s a great analogy for the typical teenager. The intellect is precise but undefined. Constantly developing it wanders about calmly seeking answers while hiding the utter confused chaos beneath. The intellect knows much but understands little.
Moving back from the mushy goop to the concrete, I’ve been trying to get a job for the better part of a week and a half. The results of my persistence? I now don’t need a job and might get one anyways. I had an interview with the Yuma Daily Sun on Friday. A certain Cynthia Marshal is head of personnel there and she knows my Venture crew leaders, who told me to talk to her. Anyways, she was impressed with me and we had a great conversation in the interview. She promised to look for a job for me and I might be writing an education column in the paper. As far as me “not needing the job” goes, my parents have decided to waive my expenses for the next few months in order to give me more time to work on homework and apply for scholarships. I feel as if a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I can throw my efforts into worthwhile activities and excel in them. I can actually get some stuff done and I feel motivated to do it.
Uh, I feel like I have to say this. My room is the cleanest it’s ever been, ever. I tore it apart on Thursday and completely reorganized my closet and desk. All my papers, a formidable number, are now organized by subject in expanding file folders. I’m really proud of it and I have to remember to be this meticulous when I get to college.
I had a Venture crew VLC this Sunday. I never thought I’d be having the same kind of conferences at the same time I used to have them in Georgia but I do. Practically every month for four years I attended PLCs when I was in leadership in Georgia. Now I’m a little older and in leadership again. I’m really excited about this by the way. I’m the Vice President of Administration for the crew. I get to plan meetings and advancement and generally help with the forward progress of the crew, which is impressive. I don’t know of any other youth organization anywhere that does as much as we do. My Venture crew has outings every month, is monetarily self-sufficient in most respects, and operates by real-world organizational conventions I need to learn to be a leader later. I sound like a recruiting packet but it’s true. We have a bunch of backpack trips planned and coming up and are working a bunch of honors and awards. Did I say I was excited? Oh yeah, and we’re recruiting girls in two weeks. It doesn’t get any better than that! Backpacking and girls!
Back on college and scholarships I’m nervous I’m not going to get any money at all since I’m so middle of the road. I’m not a minority. I don’t count for need based aid. I don’t even have a remotely hard life to talk about for merit based scholarships. I don’t contribute a thousand hours of community service every year and I’m not quite smart enough to beat people out for “smart money”. It bothers me. I want scholarships but I don’t know if I’ll get them.
Well I think I’m running out of steam for what is becoming quite the marathon entry.
My faith flounders, a topic for another day.
Goodnight to chaos