An update of sorts
My grandmother died in her sleep in the early morning on Halloween. She was the person who made sure I was fed and safe as often as she could, all my life. She was also the one who taught me that people have roles. That meant that to some she was a mother, others a grandmother, still others a lover. To me she was one of the most important people in the world. She was sick for many, many years and her death means she is no longer in constant pain, fighting for each breath and passing the long days waiting to die. It also changes the world for me because I am still at a point where everything I see reminds me that she can't see anything anymore. My brother said this is what they mean by "grieving".
I went to Texas for her funeral and managed to see a lot of people I care about, and also grandma's long term partner, the man I consider my grandfather because they were together 23 years. He's taking it pretty hard and there are a lot of guns in that big old house they shared. I don't know what he will do from here but whatever he chooses I respect. He's old and tired and this has been really hard for him.
So when I got back the car was in the shop and Michael was in north county with his friends so that he could continue to get to and from work. The computer room was soaked in urine from Silvie and a couple days later Michael and I took her to the humane society. They called me and said her microchip had not been updated to reflect that we owned her, and as a result the no kill shelter where we got her collected her. She has a chance now to be someone's loved little kitty which is a better outcome than I could have hoped for.
At this time my telephone does not work. The unit has to be replaced.
Last thing: I now have medical insurance and am on meds for my crippling depression and also my epilepsy. I can't drink but I don't want to. Very strange.
I hope those of you who read this are having a decent time with your lives and nothing too awful is happening. If it is, though, just do what I have done. Take drugs to ice over the pain and remember that it's possible that each day you wake up you could feel just a little bit better than the day before.
I went to Texas for her funeral and managed to see a lot of people I care about, and also grandma's long term partner, the man I consider my grandfather because they were together 23 years. He's taking it pretty hard and there are a lot of guns in that big old house they shared. I don't know what he will do from here but whatever he chooses I respect. He's old and tired and this has been really hard for him.
So when I got back the car was in the shop and Michael was in north county with his friends so that he could continue to get to and from work. The computer room was soaked in urine from Silvie and a couple days later Michael and I took her to the humane society. They called me and said her microchip had not been updated to reflect that we owned her, and as a result the no kill shelter where we got her collected her. She has a chance now to be someone's loved little kitty which is a better outcome than I could have hoped for.
At this time my telephone does not work. The unit has to be replaced.
Last thing: I now have medical insurance and am on meds for my crippling depression and also my epilepsy. I can't drink but I don't want to. Very strange.
I hope those of you who read this are having a decent time with your lives and nothing too awful is happening. If it is, though, just do what I have done. Take drugs to ice over the pain and remember that it's possible that each day you wake up you could feel just a little bit better than the day before.