Had a Bad Day Again
As a human, bad days come and go. But even the bad days seem coated with some secret sweetness. Though I am tired, I still function. Though I am in pain, I remember goodness. Though I cry, I can still smile. My cloud has no power; I see the sun shine through regardless. I allow my memories to overwhelm me, and for one moment, I am consumed with pain. But I have no one to turn to. There are things that only a select few ever earn the responsibility to hear, to endure. I still feel it is not necessary to trouble some people with the negative emotions of my illogic. It is a choice I make. Yet the few I have used as outlets are no longer a part of my life as they used to be. So I must look within myself for comfort, or rather, distraction. Something to keep me going, because I know tomorrow will be brighter. And so I fumble with incoherent prayers and I look at the stars; I feel lonely yet independent. One content may still succumb to sadness from time to time. And for the first time, I am alright with that. I will not let it consume me completely. We must learn from the past without compromising the present. I am learning to do that now, and it feels good, despite the tears.