a little advice...
As a certified sexologist, psychiatrist and swimming instructor, I have decided to publish some questions that are frequently asked.
Dear Sacagawea,
I have been dating my current boyfriend for 3 years. Every monday, wednesday and friday he comes home at around 3 am smelling of booze and dead fish. He swears to me that he has just been hanging out with the guys and I have nothing to worry about. I have found underwear in his pick-up truck on 7 separate occasions that aren't even close to my size. My question to you is: Should I trust him?
Sincerely,
Worried in Wisconsin
Dear Worried in Wisconsin,
Of course you should trust him; men don't lie. I'm sure he is just out hanging with his buddies drinking. The fish smell is probably just really bad body odor and the underwear probably just fell into his truck somehow. Stick with this one, he sounds like a winner.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Dear Sacagawea,
My girlfriend is becoming a "cold fish" in bed. Each time I try and touch her she just turns away and says she has a headache or cramps. I am running out of pornography and lotion. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Frustrated in Fresno
Dear Frustrated in Fresno,
There is a very easy solution to this: Take her out to a bar, load her with drinks and flirt with other women. When she sees that you are wanted by other women, she will get very jealous and screw your brains out when you get home. Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Dear Sacagawea,
What is the best way to clean pantyhose?
Sincerely,
Sussie
Dear Sussie,
The method I use is as follows:
1. fill the sink with a little soap and lukewarm water
2. allow the hose to soak for at least 10 minutes
3. rinse with cool water and ring out
4. hang to dry
Here's another little tip: if you get a run, just dab some clear nail polish on it! This has saved so many of my hoses and a lot of valuable time!
Dear Sacagawea,
What is a good way to "turn on" a woman? Also, do you have any good tips to make sex a little more interesting?
Sincerely,
clueless in Cincinnati
Dear clueless in Cincinnati,
Here are a few tips for turning women on. First, you need to always have mellow music playing, the moody blues would be a good choice. Another good idea is to growl when you are getting hot and heavy; this is always such a turn on for me. Involving food in bed is always a hit. Try getting creative with your food choices. For example, I really enjoy having tangerines and whipped cream rubbed all over me and then eaten off with a spork. Role playing is also always fun. A few things that I have done in the past are: rock star and 15 year old fan, hydrogen and oxygen, milkman and housewife, hot dog and bun. The main thing is to be creative and do what makes you feel good. I hope these tips make your sex life a little more lively.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Well, that is all for now. Hopefully this has helped some of you, and if it hasn't, feel free to ask me anything.
Dear Sacagawea,
I have been dating my current boyfriend for 3 years. Every monday, wednesday and friday he comes home at around 3 am smelling of booze and dead fish. He swears to me that he has just been hanging out with the guys and I have nothing to worry about. I have found underwear in his pick-up truck on 7 separate occasions that aren't even close to my size. My question to you is: Should I trust him?
Sincerely,
Worried in Wisconsin
Dear Worried in Wisconsin,
Of course you should trust him; men don't lie. I'm sure he is just out hanging with his buddies drinking. The fish smell is probably just really bad body odor and the underwear probably just fell into his truck somehow. Stick with this one, he sounds like a winner.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Dear Sacagawea,
My girlfriend is becoming a "cold fish" in bed. Each time I try and touch her she just turns away and says she has a headache or cramps. I am running out of pornography and lotion. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Frustrated in Fresno
Dear Frustrated in Fresno,
There is a very easy solution to this: Take her out to a bar, load her with drinks and flirt with other women. When she sees that you are wanted by other women, she will get very jealous and screw your brains out when you get home. Hope this helps.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Dear Sacagawea,
What is the best way to clean pantyhose?
Sincerely,
Sussie
Dear Sussie,
The method I use is as follows:
1. fill the sink with a little soap and lukewarm water
2. allow the hose to soak for at least 10 minutes
3. rinse with cool water and ring out
4. hang to dry
Here's another little tip: if you get a run, just dab some clear nail polish on it! This has saved so many of my hoses and a lot of valuable time!
Dear Sacagawea,
What is a good way to "turn on" a woman? Also, do you have any good tips to make sex a little more interesting?
Sincerely,
clueless in Cincinnati
Dear clueless in Cincinnati,
Here are a few tips for turning women on. First, you need to always have mellow music playing, the moody blues would be a good choice. Another good idea is to growl when you are getting hot and heavy; this is always such a turn on for me. Involving food in bed is always a hit. Try getting creative with your food choices. For example, I really enjoy having tangerines and whipped cream rubbed all over me and then eaten off with a spork. Role playing is also always fun. A few things that I have done in the past are: rock star and 15 year old fan, hydrogen and oxygen, milkman and housewife, hot dog and bun. The main thing is to be creative and do what makes you feel good. I hope these tips make your sex life a little more lively.
Sincerely,
Sacagawea
Well, that is all for now. Hopefully this has helped some of you, and if it hasn't, feel free to ask me anything.