God Damn Nicotine
I have quit smoking 3 times now in my short life. I only recently started back up again after taking an 8 month hiatus. I am not sure what it is about the addiction that is so calming to me. What it does to my lungs and body are severe yet I puff on cigarettes multiple times a day for sweet relief. Toss in a beer or cup of coffee and I am yours!
I am addicted to all things vampiric as well...I am currently watching a series on HBO called True Blood. Oh how I love this damn show! I love the characters and the mood and the story line. Ack!
I just finished the Twilight series and I thought to myself, you know, the only vampire novelist you dislike is Anne Rice. I know. How sacrilegious is that? I read her books and found them fairly entertaining but damn-it, I didn't get hooked. Now when she wrote the story of sleeping beauty. Now that was an enticing trinity of debauchery.
I have been posting to my journal, but they seem to all end up too personal and I make them private. My heart and soul are stuck in a chaotic playground, tossing about in a tornado of confusion and emotion. I am not sure what I want anymore. I was positive I wanted a divorce. I was moving on with my life and blast it all he begged for me to attend at least 3 counseling sessions with him and now my world is lost, shattered, confused...Is that dramatic enough for you? I feel it is more dramatic, but whether the drama is in a positive light or negative is unknown.
I am still the skeptic in these meetings, I still refrain from choosing a side, making a decision, or melting to his charms. I have been hurt for far too long to run back like a simpering little puppy.