time to be strong
Sometimes I dont want to be strong. I just wanna crawl in a hole and hide till my problems go away. My doctor wants me to have surgery again and im so damn scarred cuz its more major than last time. Part of me just wants to scream and cry cuz they cant figure out why I keep getting this. Im going to see another specialist before I call the surgen to set it up. I know that i have to be strong and not let this affect me. The thought of dying just sometimes is in the back of my mind and i hate it. Live life to the fullest because you never know what tomorrow brings. I just hope they are making me scared for nothing. Though i thought once was enough. Being alone sometimes is what makes things harder. I was always taught that God never gives you more than you can handle....and every time life brought me something that I thought I would never get through...I have. Its time to trust again that everything will be alright. I just wish for once in my life that someone would understand and be there.