this shit i fucken deal with!
Well i had to cut my fucken hair today and it looks like shit! I fucken hate my parents to death i cant wait to get out of this shit hole house and live the way i want to instead of by two ppl who were raised my military parents. My moms dad was in the air force and my dads dad was in the draft so both of them were raised as if they were in the fucken military. For some reason a mans hair cant be long at all a mna cant have tattoos or rings in his ear or any other part of his body why thye dont know i have asked a million god damn times and all thye have to say is if you live in my house this is what you have to do which is very fucked up. I cant do what i want with my own god damn body and the music i am listen to right now i have to have my head phones on to listen ot it cuz its godsmack ya i pikced i fucken hate you cuz of them off the cd it fits my mood to a tea right now. It's odd how i can be so nice and then I'm around my parents and i turn totaly diffrent its like they bring the worst in me and have fun in doing so. In 3 months i will be off probation and the hell out of here i dont wish this kind of life on any one if i didnt have any hope left in me i would have been dead long ago but i want to much to die i want a normal life with out being told what to do every day i wake up and getting yelled at when i do what i want or act like who i realy am. My dad walked in my room with out knocking as always yesterday and seen me watching the prince of egypt like i was going to belive in all the crap they have been pushing down my throat i told him i was just watching it cuz it looked cool. Now i feel like riping it up so i wont be able ot watch it again and get asked a ton of questions on my faith if i do or dont belive in god. I though i made it perfectly clear when i said out loud and clear that i do not belive in god nore have i ever i tryed awhile back but i never realy did. It's kind of hard to belive in a ghost i never have seen that doesnt seem to give a crap about the ppl he made and left earth is one big shit hole now and its not getting any better. But i guess ppl belive if they keep fucking it up and have thsi made up ghost that will fix all there problems its all ok and they dont have to worry about killing every thing in site. Man i need to call caitlin soon and talk to her ans see how shes doing and all man i dotn want to take my hat off around her now it looks so freaken bad i cant even part my hair now. I feel like shaven my hair again when burch leaves to piss my parents off even more. I kind of liked the skin head look it felt good when it was hot and i could put my hat alot lower on my head hum? Well i know one thing for sure i will get totaly wasted when hes here no matter what as always its kind of sad i only feel happy when caitlin is around or I'm wasted. Well i got soem shit to do and i think a good bmx session out tonight will do me alot of good so laters for now and ken dude happy freakne birthday ya old man lol laters!