Lovers, 023
Title: Lovers
Author: sa-kun
Fandom: Harry Potter, Supernatural
Characters/Pairings: Castiel, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1112
Prompt: 023, lovers.
Summary: In which Dean and Sam question Castiel's cellphone usage.
Disclaimer: I do not own.
Author's Notes/Warnings: Spoilers up to book 7 (HP), spoilers for season 4 & 5 (S05E08) of SPN. Part of my crossover series: start here.
"This is pointless," Castiel declared.
"No, hey, wait, man!" Dean grabbed Castiel by the wrist and tugged him back down on the bed again.
"Look, Sam's gonna be back any time now with food, so I just wanna make sure you're getting this, all right?"
Castiel's eyes were narrowed, forehead furrowed as if he were squinting at something far away. "Dean, this entire endeavour is futile." He reached out and grabbed one of the mags on the bed. "These 'Busty Asian Beauties' are not appealing."
"Come on!" Dean protested. "How can you not like them?"
"They're not proper representations-"
Castiel's response was cut off by the door opening and Sam stepping inside with the bags of cheap takeout.
"Dude, you gotta stop shoving porn at him," Sam complained, rolling his eyes. "Or at least let him see that there's more than 'Busty Asian Beauties' out there."
"Oh, like what, Sam? Geeky interns? Badass police chicks? Hot librarians?"
Castiel made a humming sound. "The librarian is indeed of pleasing proportions," he said, only to have both Sam and Dean stare at him as if a goat had jumped out of his mouth. Slipping a hand down into one of his pockets, Castiel retrieved a slip of paper. "He gave me a numerical code that I can't decipher along with a smiley face. I believe he named it James." His tone was only slightly bemused.
"Dude. The librarian's a dude."
Sam grin was wide, with just a hint of smugness directed at Dean. "Cas, you got hit on by the librarian. Man, what'd you do? No one's gay in a small town, and he gave you his number?"
Castiel frowned. "I merely complimented his physique and asked if he was in need of assistance in order to ascertain the proper techniques involved in callisthenics. He then gave me this note and…caressed my bottom. I don't understand." Castiel full out scowled in confusion. "Why would he caress my bottom?"
"Dude, you're not gay, Cas!" Dean blurted, his eyes a little wild. "I know you're not. You liked Chastity, right?"
Castiel turned his narrowed gaze on Dean. "That is not of import. I'm content, Dean," he primly pointed out. "Besides, the voice informed me I was out of minutes when I tried calling Harry yesterday, so I can't call the librarian now. May I borrow your phone, Dean?"
"No!" Dean exclaimed. "I'm not helping you bag yourself a male librarian, Cas. No way!"
"I don't want him in a bag, Dean. Harry has pointed out before that-"
"You talk way too much to that skinny little Brit, man," Dean complained.
Meanwhile, still grinning, Sam sat down next to Castiel on the bed. "You can borrow my phone if you like, Cas."
"Sammy, no!" Dean protested. "You can't turn an angel of the Lord gay, dude! That's, that's like, blasphemy, or something!"
"My Father created my brothers and I to love all of his creations. There's no distinction between an amoeba and an elephant, much less between what you refer to as gay people and overcompensating heterosexuals suffering from minority complexes."
Dean gaped.
Sam laughed. "Okay, yeah, you totally gotta hang out with that Harry guy more, Cas."
-x-
A week later, and neither Sam nor Dean knew for sure if Castiel actually had called, what Dean had dubbed, the 'Gaybrarian'. Sam had talked Dean into buying more minutes for Castiel, though, so chances were, Dean knew, that Castiel had gone and…given in to some homosexual urges or something.
It creeped him out a little, yeah, but only because it was Castiel. Gabriel he had no problems believing was into everything that moved, but fact was that Castiel was the same dude who'd been terrified just sitting down inside a brothel.
They were finally done with the case (mojoed up kittens from hell), though, and they were packing up and heading out. Back to Bobby's, maybe, or just on to the next town. Sam was trying to find a new case for them on the laptop while Dean packed up the room.
"I need more minutes, Dean," Castiel declared, speaking right into Dean's ear.
"Gah!" Dean jumped back, rubbing a hand over his ear. "Cas! Some warning!"
Sam was snickering, but he was also rubbing a hand over his chest, which let Dean know just fine that he'd been spooked as well by the angel's abrupt appearance in the room.
Castiel furrowed his brow and held out his phone to Dean. "I need more minutes," he repeated seriously.
Rubbing a hand over his face, Dean frowned a little. He was seriously starting to feel like some dad who'd a teenage kid - daughter - what with the way Castiel kept using up all his fucking minutes in what felt like seconds on a frigging guy. "More? Seriously?"
"Yes."
"I got you, like, seven hours a week ago, Cas. No way you used them all up already."
"I have," Castiel said.
"I'm putting a ban on your phone for a week," Dean blurted.
Sam startled in his chair. "Dude, you sound like Dad."
"Shut up, bitch."
"Jerk. You do."
In Dean's hand, the phone began ringing, blaring out a tinny edition of… "Hey, is that the theme song for Dr Sexy?" Sam wondered, a hint of laughter in his tone.
Dean gave his little brother a glare worthy of some serious doom and destruction, then turned it on Castiel after Sam showed no signs of succumbing to spontaneous combustion. "What the hell, man?"
Castiel looked nonplussed. "Gabriel set it for me." Then he help up his phone, pulled it open with enough concentration and focus one would normally apply to something like brain surgery and pushed the correct button.
"Hello, Harry."
Dean rolled his eyes. "Seriously?" he mouthed at Sam, who shrugged in return. But he looked a little confused, too, so Dean guessed he wasn't the only one who found it more than a little odd - and way more than creepy - at how much time Castiel seriously spent on a guy he'd met a grand total of one times.
"I'm out of minutes," Castiel was saying. "I will come see you shortly."
Okay, Dean realised, so maybe Castiel was mojo-ing his way over to see the guy whenever he felt like it.
"Cas, seriously," Dean started after Castiel hung up.
"What, Dean?" Castiel turned to face him, somehow, ending up right in his fucking face.
"Why d'you spend all your minutes on a guy you can just fly over to see whenever you want?"
Castiel didn't so much as blink. "Because it would be improper," he said, as if that explained it all.
Then he was gone.
Sequel: Family
Author: sa-kun
Fandom: Harry Potter, Supernatural
Characters/Pairings: Castiel, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1112
Prompt: 023, lovers.
Summary: In which Dean and Sam question Castiel's cellphone usage.
Disclaimer: I do not own.
Author's Notes/Warnings: Spoilers up to book 7 (HP), spoilers for season 4 & 5 (S05E08) of SPN. Part of my crossover series: start here.
"This is pointless," Castiel declared.
"No, hey, wait, man!" Dean grabbed Castiel by the wrist and tugged him back down on the bed again.
"Look, Sam's gonna be back any time now with food, so I just wanna make sure you're getting this, all right?"
Castiel's eyes were narrowed, forehead furrowed as if he were squinting at something far away. "Dean, this entire endeavour is futile." He reached out and grabbed one of the mags on the bed. "These 'Busty Asian Beauties' are not appealing."
"Come on!" Dean protested. "How can you not like them?"
"They're not proper representations-"
Castiel's response was cut off by the door opening and Sam stepping inside with the bags of cheap takeout.
"Dude, you gotta stop shoving porn at him," Sam complained, rolling his eyes. "Or at least let him see that there's more than 'Busty Asian Beauties' out there."
"Oh, like what, Sam? Geeky interns? Badass police chicks? Hot librarians?"
Castiel made a humming sound. "The librarian is indeed of pleasing proportions," he said, only to have both Sam and Dean stare at him as if a goat had jumped out of his mouth. Slipping a hand down into one of his pockets, Castiel retrieved a slip of paper. "He gave me a numerical code that I can't decipher along with a smiley face. I believe he named it James." His tone was only slightly bemused.
"Dude. The librarian's a dude."
Sam grin was wide, with just a hint of smugness directed at Dean. "Cas, you got hit on by the librarian. Man, what'd you do? No one's gay in a small town, and he gave you his number?"
Castiel frowned. "I merely complimented his physique and asked if he was in need of assistance in order to ascertain the proper techniques involved in callisthenics. He then gave me this note and…caressed my bottom. I don't understand." Castiel full out scowled in confusion. "Why would he caress my bottom?"
"Dude, you're not gay, Cas!" Dean blurted, his eyes a little wild. "I know you're not. You liked Chastity, right?"
Castiel turned his narrowed gaze on Dean. "That is not of import. I'm content, Dean," he primly pointed out. "Besides, the voice informed me I was out of minutes when I tried calling Harry yesterday, so I can't call the librarian now. May I borrow your phone, Dean?"
"No!" Dean exclaimed. "I'm not helping you bag yourself a male librarian, Cas. No way!"
"I don't want him in a bag, Dean. Harry has pointed out before that-"
"You talk way too much to that skinny little Brit, man," Dean complained.
Meanwhile, still grinning, Sam sat down next to Castiel on the bed. "You can borrow my phone if you like, Cas."
"Sammy, no!" Dean protested. "You can't turn an angel of the Lord gay, dude! That's, that's like, blasphemy, or something!"
"My Father created my brothers and I to love all of his creations. There's no distinction between an amoeba and an elephant, much less between what you refer to as gay people and overcompensating heterosexuals suffering from minority complexes."
Dean gaped.
Sam laughed. "Okay, yeah, you totally gotta hang out with that Harry guy more, Cas."
-x-
A week later, and neither Sam nor Dean knew for sure if Castiel actually had called, what Dean had dubbed, the 'Gaybrarian'. Sam had talked Dean into buying more minutes for Castiel, though, so chances were, Dean knew, that Castiel had gone and…given in to some homosexual urges or something.
It creeped him out a little, yeah, but only because it was Castiel. Gabriel he had no problems believing was into everything that moved, but fact was that Castiel was the same dude who'd been terrified just sitting down inside a brothel.
They were finally done with the case (mojoed up kittens from hell), though, and they were packing up and heading out. Back to Bobby's, maybe, or just on to the next town. Sam was trying to find a new case for them on the laptop while Dean packed up the room.
"I need more minutes, Dean," Castiel declared, speaking right into Dean's ear.
"Gah!" Dean jumped back, rubbing a hand over his ear. "Cas! Some warning!"
Sam was snickering, but he was also rubbing a hand over his chest, which let Dean know just fine that he'd been spooked as well by the angel's abrupt appearance in the room.
Castiel furrowed his brow and held out his phone to Dean. "I need more minutes," he repeated seriously.
Rubbing a hand over his face, Dean frowned a little. He was seriously starting to feel like some dad who'd a teenage kid - daughter - what with the way Castiel kept using up all his fucking minutes in what felt like seconds on a frigging guy. "More? Seriously?"
"Yes."
"I got you, like, seven hours a week ago, Cas. No way you used them all up already."
"I have," Castiel said.
"I'm putting a ban on your phone for a week," Dean blurted.
Sam startled in his chair. "Dude, you sound like Dad."
"Shut up, bitch."
"Jerk. You do."
In Dean's hand, the phone began ringing, blaring out a tinny edition of… "Hey, is that the theme song for Dr Sexy?" Sam wondered, a hint of laughter in his tone.
Dean gave his little brother a glare worthy of some serious doom and destruction, then turned it on Castiel after Sam showed no signs of succumbing to spontaneous combustion. "What the hell, man?"
Castiel looked nonplussed. "Gabriel set it for me." Then he help up his phone, pulled it open with enough concentration and focus one would normally apply to something like brain surgery and pushed the correct button.
"Hello, Harry."
Dean rolled his eyes. "Seriously?" he mouthed at Sam, who shrugged in return. But he looked a little confused, too, so Dean guessed he wasn't the only one who found it more than a little odd - and way more than creepy - at how much time Castiel seriously spent on a guy he'd met a grand total of one times.
"I'm out of minutes," Castiel was saying. "I will come see you shortly."
Okay, Dean realised, so maybe Castiel was mojo-ing his way over to see the guy whenever he felt like it.
"Cas, seriously," Dean started after Castiel hung up.
"What, Dean?" Castiel turned to face him, somehow, ending up right in his fucking face.
"Why d'you spend all your minutes on a guy you can just fly over to see whenever you want?"
Castiel didn't so much as blink. "Because it would be improper," he said, as if that explained it all.
Then he was gone.
Sequel: Family