Butai FanFic: My Messiah
Title: My Messiah
Rating: G
Warning: Spoilers for "Messiah ~ Dou no Shou~"
Status: Complete
Characters: Mitsumi Haku, Shiba Shuusuke
Guest Appearances: Kaidou Eiri, Gojyo Souma
Pairings/Friendship: Mitsumi Haku + Kaidou Eiri Friendship, Shiba Shuusuke + Gojyo Souma Friendship
Butai / Stage Play: Messiah ~ Dou no Shou ~ (The Messiah Project)
Timeline: Set during "Messiah ~ Dou no Shou ~"
Summary: In the aftermath of their latest mission, Mitsumi Haku waits on Kaidou Eiri to wake up, contemplating the bond they shared.
A/N: None of the characters belong to me. Comments and criticisms are welcomed. ENJOY! XD
MY MESSIAH
The whispers followed him everywhere he went, made louder by the unnatural silence that accompanied him; a silence that had usurped the place of his usual companion. Morbidly, Haku thought, if Eiri had died, it wouldn’t have been quite as awkward - he had experienced it, twice, and both times, he had had a string of well-wishes and sentiments of sympathy - but with Eiri being in the hospital - it had already been two weeks, and he still showed no signs of waking up - everyone seemed to have no idea what to say, treating him with kid’s gloves as if he was made of spun glass.
He supposed it hadn’t helped matters that the last person who had tried to warn Haku and prepare him for the worst - that Eiri just might not wake up, and that he would fade away without ever opening his eyes again - Haku had completely lost it on the person, throwing his juice box at the person and yelling that Eiri would wake up - because Eiri had promised Haku that Haku that he would be different from Haku’s other Messiahs, that he would win where they had lost, that Haku would not lose him.
The whispers had taken on a harder edge then; there was the added speculation of what would happen to Haku if the worst happened to his newest Messiah.
He wouldn’t be the first member of the Church to kill himself, driven insane by loss and grief.
‘Good morning.’
If Haku had been someone who was less self-contained - if he had been Eiri - he would’ve jumped out of his skin at the sudden, direct greeting intruding on his spiraling thoughts, especially with the whispers that still crawled all over him and prickled at the back of his neck. ‘Good morning,’ he replied as Shiba Shuusuke placed his own food tray on the table, sitting opposite Haku, unperturbed by the way the whispers had become overwhelmingly loud at his presence.
After all, his Messiah was the other Church member who was still in the hospital from the same mission that had landed Eiri in his coma.
‘How’s Souma?’
Shuusuke huffed - a gesture that bordered on being childish, and Haku couldn’t help but marvel at the change that Souma had wrought in the previously by-the-book uptight young man - and said, ‘Itching to get out; he’s already driven everyone up the walls with his incessant whining and futile attempts at escaping. The doctor said he’ll be discharged tomorrow if he is good and actually obeys the doctor’s orders for once.’
Haku chuckled at that. He had dropped by Souma’s room for a brief visit the day before, and the other man had talked his ear off about being stuck in a bed when he was perfectly fine and pleading with Haku to entertain him with his stories about Bob because he was bored out of his mind, and Shuusuke - the traitor who called himself Souma’s Messiah, but had the gall to side with the irritating doctor in holding Souma hostage - was no help with that at all. Eiri would probably be just as bad - throughout their partnership, Haku couldn’t remember a time when Eiri had voluntarily done nothing; the younger man absolutely hated inactivity - and Haku would probably go deaf from being yelled at; a privilege of being Eiri’s Messiah.
At the thought of the pale, still figure almost eclipsed by sterile sheets, a tangle of wires and a bed that seemed to engulf him, Haku couldn’t help the sudden swell of bitterness that welled up within him.
He would take deafness over this silence anytime.
Something of his thoughts must have shown on Haku’s face because Shuusuke sobered up immediately; all traces of his amused annoyance at his own Messiah vanishing instantly.
‘So, about Eiri… No change?’ Shuusuke’s tone was casual - if anyone had chance to hear them, they would have thought that Haku and Shuusuke were discussing the weather - but there was no mistaking the weight in his eyes as Shuusuke watched Haku carefully.
It spoke volumes of their friendship that the other Church member could accurately follow Haku’s train of thought.
Although, Haku really had nothing on his mind but Eiri these days, so it wasn’t all that difficult to trace what he was thinking.
‘Ah.’
There was silence as Haku struggled to put his emotions into words. The past two weeks had been hell for both of them; Shuusuke, for all his flippancy, had spent all his waking hours between classes and post-mission report sessions with Souma, hovering over his Messiah as Souma recovered from the wounds sustained from his captivity, and Haku had spent all his waking and sleeping hours with Eiri, refusing to budge just in case Eiri woke up, until he had been forcibly kicked out by the nurse. A part of Haku was still in a state of shock, and he had yet to properly process his own whirlwind of tumultuous emotions over the mission and its aftermath. There was bitterness - that once again, his fate had injured another person who dared to call themselves Haku’s Messiah - and anger - at circumstance, at himself - and an overwhelming need for Eiri to wake up - he wasn’t at all prepared for how much he missed the younger man.
He missed their morning routine; of him being woken up by Eiri’s yelling because Haku had once again set an ungodly number of alarm clocks to ring at an ungodly hour in the morning.
Because he had known that Eiri wasn’t a morning person, and it had been a deliberate tactic to get Eiri to move out of the room - and by extension, out of Haku’s life - but Eiri, with his deadly aim, had shot through Haku’s plans with every alarm clock he managed to hit with his toy gun and rubber bullets.
He missed their constant bickering as Eiri complained about having to clean up Haku’s sticky messes because ants were beginning to build nests in the stacks of sweet wrappers and juice boxes that littered their room.
Because Haku had refused to change for Eiri - he hadn’t wanted any reminder that there had been another person sharing his private space, especially when he was left alone again - but Eiri had found a way to make that room his as much as it had been Haku’s; he hadn’t thrown away any of Haku’s keepsakes or even necessarily changed anything of Haku’s, but there was no doubt that the room belonged to two people and not one.
He even missed the silence; Haku lazing around, munching on chocolates as Eiri read up on their latest class assignment.
Because even when they did not speak, the companionable silence shared between two people was very different from a silence born of being alone.
It was ironic that everything Haku had done to keep Eiri from getting close was now everything that reminded Haku of the bond they shared; a bond unique to them that was theirs and theirs alone.
Because Eiri hadn’t left; had stuck with Haku through it all.
In stubbornly refusing to change who they were, they had learned to live with each other; Haku had learned to live with Eiri, had come to accept the younger man, yells and silences, personality clashes, faults and all.
Somewhere between then and now, Eiri had truly become Haku’s Messiah; the one who had saved Haku from his fear and self-imposed isolation.
And, Haku no longer knew how to live without him.
‘He’d probably scold me. I haven’t been tidying up our room.’
Anyone else would’ve looked at Haku with pity - Poor guy, didn’t he realize that his Messiah was dying? He would have to get over his state of denial soon - but, as expected - as Haku had hoped - Shuusuke was different.
They were, after all, the last four of their batch to survive to the final stage of graduation, and they knew better than to doubt the connection between Messiahs.
The said Church member pushed his spectacles up the bridge of his nose, looking faintly reproachful. ‘You shouldn’t stress him out so much.’
Haku shrugged, almost carelessly. ‘He gets stressed too easily,’ he said, ‘I’ll clean it up when the doctors release him.’
It was a huge relief for Haku to be able to speak so normally about Eiri without being scrutinized and judged.
Because Haku may have missed Eiri terribly - the man’s absence a yawning hole in Haku’s life - but, despite all his bitterness and his anger, the one emotion that did not plague him was fear.
He didn’t fear for Eiri.
It wasn’t denial; it was, pure and simple, belief.
He believed that Eiri would wake up; his connection with the other man told him so.
Just as Shuusuke had believed - completely and utterly - that Souma had been alive, despite all the evidence that pointed to the contrary, Haku now believed with complete and utter conviction that Eiri would keep his promise; that he would live on until Haku had evened the score between them.
That Haku would not lose him; that he would prove Haku wrong and beat Haku’s fate.
Because if anybody could do it, it would be him.
Believe in me. I am your Messiah.
And, if there was one person that Haku believed in more than himself, it was Kaidou Eiri.
His other half.
His one and only Messiah.
~ OWARI ~
Rating: G
Warning: Spoilers for "Messiah ~ Dou no Shou~"
Status: Complete
Characters: Mitsumi Haku, Shiba Shuusuke
Guest Appearances: Kaidou Eiri, Gojyo Souma
Pairings/Friendship: Mitsumi Haku + Kaidou Eiri Friendship, Shiba Shuusuke + Gojyo Souma Friendship
Butai / Stage Play: Messiah ~ Dou no Shou ~ (The Messiah Project)
Timeline: Set during "Messiah ~ Dou no Shou ~"
Summary: In the aftermath of their latest mission, Mitsumi Haku waits on Kaidou Eiri to wake up, contemplating the bond they shared.
A/N: None of the characters belong to me. Comments and criticisms are welcomed. ENJOY! XD
MY MESSIAH
The whispers followed him everywhere he went, made louder by the unnatural silence that accompanied him; a silence that had usurped the place of his usual companion. Morbidly, Haku thought, if Eiri had died, it wouldn’t have been quite as awkward - he had experienced it, twice, and both times, he had had a string of well-wishes and sentiments of sympathy - but with Eiri being in the hospital - it had already been two weeks, and he still showed no signs of waking up - everyone seemed to have no idea what to say, treating him with kid’s gloves as if he was made of spun glass.
He supposed it hadn’t helped matters that the last person who had tried to warn Haku and prepare him for the worst - that Eiri just might not wake up, and that he would fade away without ever opening his eyes again - Haku had completely lost it on the person, throwing his juice box at the person and yelling that Eiri would wake up - because Eiri had promised Haku that Haku that he would be different from Haku’s other Messiahs, that he would win where they had lost, that Haku would not lose him.
The whispers had taken on a harder edge then; there was the added speculation of what would happen to Haku if the worst happened to his newest Messiah.
He wouldn’t be the first member of the Church to kill himself, driven insane by loss and grief.
‘Good morning.’
If Haku had been someone who was less self-contained - if he had been Eiri - he would’ve jumped out of his skin at the sudden, direct greeting intruding on his spiraling thoughts, especially with the whispers that still crawled all over him and prickled at the back of his neck. ‘Good morning,’ he replied as Shiba Shuusuke placed his own food tray on the table, sitting opposite Haku, unperturbed by the way the whispers had become overwhelmingly loud at his presence.
After all, his Messiah was the other Church member who was still in the hospital from the same mission that had landed Eiri in his coma.
‘How’s Souma?’
Shuusuke huffed - a gesture that bordered on being childish, and Haku couldn’t help but marvel at the change that Souma had wrought in the previously by-the-book uptight young man - and said, ‘Itching to get out; he’s already driven everyone up the walls with his incessant whining and futile attempts at escaping. The doctor said he’ll be discharged tomorrow if he is good and actually obeys the doctor’s orders for once.’
Haku chuckled at that. He had dropped by Souma’s room for a brief visit the day before, and the other man had talked his ear off about being stuck in a bed when he was perfectly fine and pleading with Haku to entertain him with his stories about Bob because he was bored out of his mind, and Shuusuke - the traitor who called himself Souma’s Messiah, but had the gall to side with the irritating doctor in holding Souma hostage - was no help with that at all. Eiri would probably be just as bad - throughout their partnership, Haku couldn’t remember a time when Eiri had voluntarily done nothing; the younger man absolutely hated inactivity - and Haku would probably go deaf from being yelled at; a privilege of being Eiri’s Messiah.
At the thought of the pale, still figure almost eclipsed by sterile sheets, a tangle of wires and a bed that seemed to engulf him, Haku couldn’t help the sudden swell of bitterness that welled up within him.
He would take deafness over this silence anytime.
Something of his thoughts must have shown on Haku’s face because Shuusuke sobered up immediately; all traces of his amused annoyance at his own Messiah vanishing instantly.
‘So, about Eiri… No change?’ Shuusuke’s tone was casual - if anyone had chance to hear them, they would have thought that Haku and Shuusuke were discussing the weather - but there was no mistaking the weight in his eyes as Shuusuke watched Haku carefully.
It spoke volumes of their friendship that the other Church member could accurately follow Haku’s train of thought.
Although, Haku really had nothing on his mind but Eiri these days, so it wasn’t all that difficult to trace what he was thinking.
‘Ah.’
There was silence as Haku struggled to put his emotions into words. The past two weeks had been hell for both of them; Shuusuke, for all his flippancy, had spent all his waking hours between classes and post-mission report sessions with Souma, hovering over his Messiah as Souma recovered from the wounds sustained from his captivity, and Haku had spent all his waking and sleeping hours with Eiri, refusing to budge just in case Eiri woke up, until he had been forcibly kicked out by the nurse. A part of Haku was still in a state of shock, and he had yet to properly process his own whirlwind of tumultuous emotions over the mission and its aftermath. There was bitterness - that once again, his fate had injured another person who dared to call themselves Haku’s Messiah - and anger - at circumstance, at himself - and an overwhelming need for Eiri to wake up - he wasn’t at all prepared for how much he missed the younger man.
He missed their morning routine; of him being woken up by Eiri’s yelling because Haku had once again set an ungodly number of alarm clocks to ring at an ungodly hour in the morning.
Because he had known that Eiri wasn’t a morning person, and it had been a deliberate tactic to get Eiri to move out of the room - and by extension, out of Haku’s life - but Eiri, with his deadly aim, had shot through Haku’s plans with every alarm clock he managed to hit with his toy gun and rubber bullets.
He missed their constant bickering as Eiri complained about having to clean up Haku’s sticky messes because ants were beginning to build nests in the stacks of sweet wrappers and juice boxes that littered their room.
Because Haku had refused to change for Eiri - he hadn’t wanted any reminder that there had been another person sharing his private space, especially when he was left alone again - but Eiri had found a way to make that room his as much as it had been Haku’s; he hadn’t thrown away any of Haku’s keepsakes or even necessarily changed anything of Haku’s, but there was no doubt that the room belonged to two people and not one.
He even missed the silence; Haku lazing around, munching on chocolates as Eiri read up on their latest class assignment.
Because even when they did not speak, the companionable silence shared between two people was very different from a silence born of being alone.
It was ironic that everything Haku had done to keep Eiri from getting close was now everything that reminded Haku of the bond they shared; a bond unique to them that was theirs and theirs alone.
Because Eiri hadn’t left; had stuck with Haku through it all.
In stubbornly refusing to change who they were, they had learned to live with each other; Haku had learned to live with Eiri, had come to accept the younger man, yells and silences, personality clashes, faults and all.
Somewhere between then and now, Eiri had truly become Haku’s Messiah; the one who had saved Haku from his fear and self-imposed isolation.
And, Haku no longer knew how to live without him.
‘He’d probably scold me. I haven’t been tidying up our room.’
Anyone else would’ve looked at Haku with pity - Poor guy, didn’t he realize that his Messiah was dying? He would have to get over his state of denial soon - but, as expected - as Haku had hoped - Shuusuke was different.
They were, after all, the last four of their batch to survive to the final stage of graduation, and they knew better than to doubt the connection between Messiahs.
The said Church member pushed his spectacles up the bridge of his nose, looking faintly reproachful. ‘You shouldn’t stress him out so much.’
Haku shrugged, almost carelessly. ‘He gets stressed too easily,’ he said, ‘I’ll clean it up when the doctors release him.’
It was a huge relief for Haku to be able to speak so normally about Eiri without being scrutinized and judged.
Because Haku may have missed Eiri terribly - the man’s absence a yawning hole in Haku’s life - but, despite all his bitterness and his anger, the one emotion that did not plague him was fear.
He didn’t fear for Eiri.
It wasn’t denial; it was, pure and simple, belief.
He believed that Eiri would wake up; his connection with the other man told him so.
Just as Shuusuke had believed - completely and utterly - that Souma had been alive, despite all the evidence that pointed to the contrary, Haku now believed with complete and utter conviction that Eiri would keep his promise; that he would live on until Haku had evened the score between them.
That Haku would not lose him; that he would prove Haku wrong and beat Haku’s fate.
Because if anybody could do it, it would be him.
Believe in me. I am your Messiah.
And, if there was one person that Haku believed in more than himself, it was Kaidou Eiri.
His other half.
His one and only Messiah.
~ OWARI ~