(no subject)
It was a night so much like this on December 5th two years ago. Anna called me in tears, trying to hold it together. I could hear her voice struggling to not break-down. "I have a question, you know when someone cuts themselves? Well, how deep is too deep, do you think?" I instantly thought of B. I knew it was bad, I think I asked. I said, "I'm coming." Anna said, "no don't." But I did. I told my dad I had to leave, I packed some stuff. I packed underwear and a tooth brush and razor blades. I drove through the snow as fast and as hard as I could. There were other cars on the rode, and I was really worried of running into one of them. It was snowing so hard that you couldn't see the edge of the road and you certainly couldn't see the lines. A car swerved into me and in dodging it I found myself in a snow drift. After people finished driving around me I pulled out and kept going.
When I think about this, it's almost as if I miss that night. After a while their parent's came home. We told them that I had been shopping at Wegman's so they'd let me stay. Cassie took the train into Downingtown because the next day was B's birthday. When she got there we went outside and smoked in marina. That was when her windows kept falling down. So the window fell down, Cass and Anna went inside so B and I taped a target bag to the window. We went back inside and we all slept together like cats. The next day I stayed over all day, I didn't go home. I think Mrs. Sadler wanted me to leave, but I stayed. She made a three tiered carrot cake with mandarin oranges from a can and parsley as decoration. Then we all rode marina to the gryphon to see Love Syndicate. After that we went to Cassie's and I got drunk for the first time. Anna and I jumped around and screamed to yeah yeah yeah's. We laid on the floor in the kitchen and boys talked to us. I had short crazy hair and I was skinny. I wore long slips over jeans.
So that was december, two months later. Well, you know...
When I think about this, it's almost as if I miss that night. After a while their parent's came home. We told them that I had been shopping at Wegman's so they'd let me stay. Cassie took the train into Downingtown because the next day was B's birthday. When she got there we went outside and smoked in marina. That was when her windows kept falling down. So the window fell down, Cass and Anna went inside so B and I taped a target bag to the window. We went back inside and we all slept together like cats. The next day I stayed over all day, I didn't go home. I think Mrs. Sadler wanted me to leave, but I stayed. She made a three tiered carrot cake with mandarin oranges from a can and parsley as decoration. Then we all rode marina to the gryphon to see Love Syndicate. After that we went to Cassie's and I got drunk for the first time. Anna and I jumped around and screamed to yeah yeah yeah's. We laid on the floor in the kitchen and boys talked to us. I had short crazy hair and I was skinny. I wore long slips over jeans.
So that was december, two months later. Well, you know...