El BASTARD COMES TO TOWN
El Bastard comes to town is an extremely disturbing and graphically violent cult film, made infamous by an incredibly twisted torture involving a lathe 600 liters of Vaseline and a carrot called Fred.
The film is set in 1920’s Brazil and concerns a deranged circus midget called “el Bastard” who loses his job in a freak show when he is replaced by a tap-dancing bearded lady with a degree in nuclear physics. This event angers el bastard who decides to go to town and embark on an orgy of killing and extreme violence. On the way he meets a kindly old man who rescues him from a pack of rabid hamsters. Filled with gratitude el bastard machine guns him and dumps his corpse in a ditch. El bastard continues on his journey, on the way he commits more gruesome atrocities including decapitating anyone with letters in their name. He carries round the severed heads 234 of them in all threaded onto a piece of rope which he wears as a necklace. Night falls before El bastard can reach town. In order to avoid the hordes of rabid werewolves and chartered accountants which stalk the countryside at night, el Bastard breaks into a convent and proceeds to massacre 400 nuns with an axe, whilst laughing insanely and burning bibles.
The next morning after crucifying all 400 corpses outside the convent El Bastard continues on his way. He arrives at town in the middle of a carnival and causes havoc by tossing grenades into the densely backed crowds and torching police men with a flame thrower. El bastard grows bored of this and decides to rest for the night. However on his way to the hotel he meets “Fred the carrot” owner of the freak show who replaced El bastard with a bearded lady. El bastard abducts him by sticking a gigantic knitting needle through his legs and dragging him away.
What follows is the infamous torture scene. It lasts for 6 hours and includes:
•El bastards cutting off all of Fred the carrot’s limbs coating them in Vaseline setting fire to them and then forcing Fred the carrot to eat them while there still burning.
• El bastard forcing Fred the carrot to watch the entire first series of Emmerdale.
• Grinding away the top of Fred the carrot’s skull with a lathe and dissolving his brain with sulphuric acid. After the torture scene El bastard “finds god” and goes to live as a hermit in the Convent where he massacred the nuns.
Trivia.
• El Bastards hero is Oscar Wilde. El bastard often quotes him especially during the massacre scene.
• The Massacre scene took 2 years to film because it was so complex.
• A scene in which el bastard assassinates Jesus was edited out for “timing reasons”. In the original script El bastard finds god after killing Jesus. In the actually film el bastard finds god lying dead under a bookcase.
• The film was banned soon after it was made (1927) because El bastard doesn’t wear trousers.
• The circus midget who played el bastard also penned the script, which was largely autobiographical
The film is set in 1920’s Brazil and concerns a deranged circus midget called “el Bastard” who loses his job in a freak show when he is replaced by a tap-dancing bearded lady with a degree in nuclear physics. This event angers el bastard who decides to go to town and embark on an orgy of killing and extreme violence. On the way he meets a kindly old man who rescues him from a pack of rabid hamsters. Filled with gratitude el bastard machine guns him and dumps his corpse in a ditch. El bastard continues on his journey, on the way he commits more gruesome atrocities including decapitating anyone with letters in their name. He carries round the severed heads 234 of them in all threaded onto a piece of rope which he wears as a necklace. Night falls before El bastard can reach town. In order to avoid the hordes of rabid werewolves and chartered accountants which stalk the countryside at night, el Bastard breaks into a convent and proceeds to massacre 400 nuns with an axe, whilst laughing insanely and burning bibles.
The next morning after crucifying all 400 corpses outside the convent El Bastard continues on his way. He arrives at town in the middle of a carnival and causes havoc by tossing grenades into the densely backed crowds and torching police men with a flame thrower. El bastard grows bored of this and decides to rest for the night. However on his way to the hotel he meets “Fred the carrot” owner of the freak show who replaced El bastard with a bearded lady. El bastard abducts him by sticking a gigantic knitting needle through his legs and dragging him away.
What follows is the infamous torture scene. It lasts for 6 hours and includes:
•El bastards cutting off all of Fred the carrot’s limbs coating them in Vaseline setting fire to them and then forcing Fred the carrot to eat them while there still burning.
• El bastard forcing Fred the carrot to watch the entire first series of Emmerdale.
• Grinding away the top of Fred the carrot’s skull with a lathe and dissolving his brain with sulphuric acid. After the torture scene El bastard “finds god” and goes to live as a hermit in the Convent where he massacred the nuns.
Trivia.
• El Bastards hero is Oscar Wilde. El bastard often quotes him especially during the massacre scene.
• The Massacre scene took 2 years to film because it was so complex.
• A scene in which el bastard assassinates Jesus was edited out for “timing reasons”. In the original script El bastard finds god after killing Jesus. In the actually film el bastard finds god lying dead under a bookcase.
• The film was banned soon after it was made (1927) because El bastard doesn’t wear trousers.
• The circus midget who played el bastard also penned the script, which was largely autobiographical