poop.
I had to work at the Java tonight for about two hours because I'm such a nice guy and covered the rest of Jenny's shift so she could spend time with her mom in the hospital.
I like knowing that I'm a nice person, but sometimes I feel that people take advantage of that aspect of my personality. I am incapable of saying 'no' and people realize this and use it to their advantage. It seems no matter how many shifts I cover, when it's time for me to ask for the favor in return, it's frowned upon. It's not just work though. I feel like sometimes I give people my full 100% attention to listen to their problems, their day, their bullshit, but when I need someone I only get about 50%. Sure they can repeat what I just said, but I don't believe they've fully acknowledged what Im trying to get across... They're too busy with their needs to stop and realize mine.
I can completely devote myself to a person and try to make their feelings become unison with mine. If a person is sad, I'll become sad. If a person is loud and happy, I'm loud and happy. That's my natural reaction to people. I'm a leech. I hate it and I'm tired of this one-sided relationship. I hate the fact that people can't react properly to my emotions and needs. I'm an open book. The way I act towards people is the way I want them to react towards me... It's simple.
"Treat people as you would like to be treated" is taught from an early age and everyone is aware of the saying, but do they know what it means? If I were to treat a person the way that they treated me, it'd for sure be the end of the relationship. If I'm giving you 100% of my attention and you're only giving me 50% how is this fair? By doing such a thing, are you trying to tell me that you want me to back off and not care as much as I really do? Should I suppress my feelings, or are you just so use to me always being there, that you take advantage of my goodwill and completely forget to pay it back? A normal person would tell me to buck up and not care. If someone doesn't appreciate my attention, I should limit it, or take it away. But if that were to happen, the relationship would surely fail and it'd all be on my shoulders. I know that I could've put up with the crap. I'd rather not, but it would have been doable. It's such a difficult position to be placed in and I find myself there almost everyday.
Anyway, this wasn't really meant towards just one person. If you feel it relates to you, then maybe I'm writing about an experience I've had with you? Most likely that isn't the case. I just feel the need to rant about something stupid because I'm lacking sleep, good music and a boyfriend.
'Night.
randy - as the sun sets on mary, it's rising on him -
ps: I really like my Fefe Dobson CD
pps: Im watching The Vision of Escaflowne again. Props to me.
I like knowing that I'm a nice person, but sometimes I feel that people take advantage of that aspect of my personality. I am incapable of saying 'no' and people realize this and use it to their advantage. It seems no matter how many shifts I cover, when it's time for me to ask for the favor in return, it's frowned upon. It's not just work though. I feel like sometimes I give people my full 100% attention to listen to their problems, their day, their bullshit, but when I need someone I only get about 50%. Sure they can repeat what I just said, but I don't believe they've fully acknowledged what Im trying to get across... They're too busy with their needs to stop and realize mine.
I can completely devote myself to a person and try to make their feelings become unison with mine. If a person is sad, I'll become sad. If a person is loud and happy, I'm loud and happy. That's my natural reaction to people. I'm a leech. I hate it and I'm tired of this one-sided relationship. I hate the fact that people can't react properly to my emotions and needs. I'm an open book. The way I act towards people is the way I want them to react towards me... It's simple.
"Treat people as you would like to be treated" is taught from an early age and everyone is aware of the saying, but do they know what it means? If I were to treat a person the way that they treated me, it'd for sure be the end of the relationship. If I'm giving you 100% of my attention and you're only giving me 50% how is this fair? By doing such a thing, are you trying to tell me that you want me to back off and not care as much as I really do? Should I suppress my feelings, or are you just so use to me always being there, that you take advantage of my goodwill and completely forget to pay it back? A normal person would tell me to buck up and not care. If someone doesn't appreciate my attention, I should limit it, or take it away. But if that were to happen, the relationship would surely fail and it'd all be on my shoulders. I know that I could've put up with the crap. I'd rather not, but it would have been doable. It's such a difficult position to be placed in and I find myself there almost everyday.
Anyway, this wasn't really meant towards just one person. If you feel it relates to you, then maybe I'm writing about an experience I've had with you? Most likely that isn't the case. I just feel the need to rant about something stupid because I'm lacking sleep, good music and a boyfriend.
'Night.
randy - as the sun sets on mary, it's rising on him -
ps: I really like my Fefe Dobson CD
pps: Im watching The Vision of Escaflowne again. Props to me.