Glamour Magazine Rape
Because I'm bored, I've decided I'll delight my many millions of readers with another entry tonight - possibly because I feel ever so slightly guilty about not having posted anything for well over a month. Oops.
So, I've decided to go through all of the little things that have amused me in this month's edition of "Glamour" magazine.
1. the "Hey, it's OK..." section.
Now, although this section is usually more entertaining, this month's does not disappoint. Quotes like "Hey, it's OK... to still squabble like a five year old when you're with your siblings" or "to have an unreasonably large handbag. It worked for Mary Poppins, right?"
2. "His naked body quirks explained"
Things such as uniballs, bent dicks and third nipples all feature in this. And yes, it's highly amusing for someone as immature as me. And of course, the opening line here is just brilliant: "So he's got a crooked penis... The penis isn't supposed to be a precise instrument of measure." Haaaaaaaaaaaaa.
3. "Love & Sex Rules (I Live By)
This features 12 different women who each share their own guidelines on dating and such. Here's what Andrea Boston, 36 had to say: "I leave my hair natural... If you're not down with my 'fro, you're not down with me." And Laura Smith, 26: "No walk-ins. If a guy turns up at my house uninvited, then I tell him, point blank, that it's unacceptable and I ask him to leave. Stopping by unexpectedly doesn't make him a sweetheart, it makes him a stalker." And - my personal favourite here - here's Chidimma Ozor, 32: "I have a very long list of qualities I want in a man. To keep myself honest, I compare any new prospects against a list of the 36 qualities that I need in a partner." 36!?!?!?!?!??!?
I won't go any further, amusement is finished for the day :')
So, I've decided to go through all of the little things that have amused me in this month's edition of "Glamour" magazine.
1. the "Hey, it's OK..." section.
Now, although this section is usually more entertaining, this month's does not disappoint. Quotes like "Hey, it's OK... to still squabble like a five year old when you're with your siblings" or "to have an unreasonably large handbag. It worked for Mary Poppins, right?"
2. "His naked body quirks explained"
Things such as uniballs, bent dicks and third nipples all feature in this. And yes, it's highly amusing for someone as immature as me. And of course, the opening line here is just brilliant: "So he's got a crooked penis... The penis isn't supposed to be a precise instrument of measure." Haaaaaaaaaaaaa.
3. "Love & Sex Rules (I Live By)
This features 12 different women who each share their own guidelines on dating and such. Here's what Andrea Boston, 36 had to say: "I leave my hair natural... If you're not down with my 'fro, you're not down with me." And Laura Smith, 26: "No walk-ins. If a guy turns up at my house uninvited, then I tell him, point blank, that it's unacceptable and I ask him to leave. Stopping by unexpectedly doesn't make him a sweetheart, it makes him a stalker." And - my personal favourite here - here's Chidimma Ozor, 32: "I have a very long list of qualities I want in a man. To keep myself honest, I compare any new prospects against a list of the 36 qualities that I need in a partner." 36!?!?!?!?!??!?
I won't go any further, amusement is finished for the day :')