Baldrssons 3.9
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Sweet Vishnu, it's been months! Three of them! I'm going to apologize, but I'm also going to make excuses. School. Work. D&D. Being social. Almost makes me want to go back to holing up in here and just Simming all the time. Enough blather! Last time, the sprogs all went to college and formed cliques under mildly ISBI-esque conditions. Syn and Gefjun became true clones. Freyr, the heir, became infatuated with a fellow named Brady. Vör dropped out. Vale got in a fight with a dormie. Freyr became a vampire. And half the kids were on academic probation. Now, we continue with...
Beakster MacSuitsy: You know, my father has a wonderful little beach resort on Tropical Island You've Never Heard Of.
Fulla: Huh.
BMS: I could always... take you there.
Fulla: Really? You'd... you'd take a girl like me?
BMS: Sure! We could hit the bar and go running on the beach or you could just lie around in a tiny bikini...
Fulla: omgomgomgomgomgomg so confused
Syn: *will lock them in a closet together later*
Geez, Vidar. You could have let it sit out a little longer. (Not visible: mile-long stink trail.)
Melody: Hey, sweetcheeks, I know I just insulted your shirt, but it's only because it doesn't do justice to how amazingly hot you are. Call me?
Vale: But... gayyy DDD8
Melody: We'll just have to change that, WON'T WE
Vale: Silly delusional psycho-bitch! Sexuality is a complex combination of several environmental and genetic factors and their effects on the psyche! Logical smackdown!
Audience: PREACH
BMS: You know, I never knew where the term “flamingly gay” came from...
Melody: Your argument cannot penetrate my thick skull! ...but your pe -
Vale: I will call the cops unless that sentence changes direction now.
Nemesis: I don't even know what I did. I just want to be friends with her. Is that so hard? ...Fulla, are you listening?
And the dropouts drop out, reducing the number of fights per day to zero.
Skeevy Dormie: hehehegaysex.
Aw, true love. Unfortunately, you're not p_t and turning you into a vampire would only mean hastily shoving you into an untimely demise.
That glitch. Fuckin' - Everything. Ruined.
All fun and games in the dorm.
Freyr: You know I love you, right?
Brady: Yes...?
Freyr: So... you'll realize that it has nothing to do with you when I say that we can't be together after college.
Brady: Okay, who is feeding you that bullshit? Why the hell not?
Freyr: It's according to some rather arbitrary rules set out by the Creator specifically for my family. Same reason I'm a vampire. It's just... divine judgment and stuff, you know? I don't want to piss Him off. He's got laser-precise plagues of flies.
Freyr: However, I'm sure He wouldn't mind much if I were to still love you... on the side?
Freyr: Hey, beautiful! You're too pretty to get shunned by your boyfriend after proposing a perfectly reasonable solution to your problems, aren't y -
Freyr: WELL FUCK YOUR MOTHER TOO
Vidar: Gosh, I can't imagine not being able to face this emblem of manliness whenever I want!
What?
Gefjun: I AM STILL A VIRGIN WTH
Uh, so are all of your siblings.
Gefjun: What, even Freyr?
Freyr: Hey, stop it, no, don't - I am trying to heal you, ladies!
Especially Freyr.
And thus the graduations begin! I did not feel like throwing a party. See your around, Vidar.
Freyr: ...that was odd.
And the man himself!
...I don't remember whether he was wearing pants.
But regardless! He moves back in with Gunnlöð and Agu (prettypalisades), and a new weekly challenge appears:
Can't Catch a Break: your sims' worst fears are realised. Attempt to fulfill as many fears for each sim every single day as possible.
Oh, I'm sure I'll be able to revamp him as soon as the week is over.
MM: Thanks for calling. What can I help you with?
Freyr: Oh, nothing much. I just have a couple of questions.
MM: I see. Lovely, beautiful, sunny day, isn't it?
Freyr: Well, I suppose soOOOOH SHIT HELP
MM: Here, drink this. It'll fix all that.
Freyr: Aw, thanks!
For best results, apply directly to throat.
Freyr: Hey, are you sure this isn't a bad batch or something? I can still feel my bladder boili...
MM: Ugh! Well, it worked, right...?
Freyr: Sure. Yeah. Care to put on a warning about that?
Freyr: At least I'm getting new pants in a moment.
MM: Right, about that. §60, sucker.
Gunn: I'm sure it is, Mr. Sixx. I'm sure it is.
Meanwhile, Freyr has a until-recently-quite-appropriate shirt.
In which he spends most of his time moping that it isn't appropriate any more.
His mopey face will be remembered for generations to come.
Sabastian (pinkposeysims): You know, actually, your life has gotten too peaceful. I am not pleased to see you.
Gunn: But... but I haven't re-seduced you yet D:
Sabastian: Don't bother.
Gunn: *heartborken!*
Brady: Oh hey Freyr I guess you're still under oath to some invisible being aren't ymmph.
Brady: Wait, what do you mean, “wrestle”?
Brady: Wow, that was gre -
Freyr: Yeah I know kthxbai
And Brady was never heard from or seen again.
Melody: Brady told me what you did to him!
Freyr: Whatever! I don't want to see your crazy carcass here anyways!
Freyr: I AM TIRED OF THIS SHIT! Can I be a vampire again??
No.
Freyr: D'AWWW WHY
Gunn's Fuckbuddy from College: WHAT! I was not informed that you would move on after not seeing me for decades! HARLOT!
Agu: Hee hee, cheating on me all those times finally comes and bites you in the ass.
Ryker: *mindborken!*
Freyr: Hey, Dad! Guess who just got a job with a massive paycheque?
Agu: Oh? OH?
Agu: HDU BE SUCCESSFUL AND HAPPY
Freyr: What the hell, Dad!
Agu: I am not your father.
Freyr: I knew that, you moron! What the hell is your problem?!
Agu: My problem is that you are not my son! Every time I look at you, I am reminded of your mother's cheating ways! When you were chosen as heir, it was a stab at my very identity and masculinity, to have dedicated so much of my life to loving and raising my children only to not have my genes passed on!
Agu: But at least now it's you who'll have to change my diapers when I go dotty.
Freyr: And I will do it with love, you old bastard.
Ivy: Um... was I supposed to see that?
Freyr: NO.
Ivy: I'm sorry, I sho -
Freyr: GET THE FUCK OUT.
Agu: Ah, Calvin's mood improvement technique. :)
Of course, all is forgiven eight seconds later.
Shocking.
Freyr: So yeah! Now I have a jooob and I'm making moneyyy and maybe soon I'll have a family and you'll get grandkids or something but mostly I have a job and I can skill and stuff.
Agu: I don't like this "job" business. I tried it. Didn't like it at all.
Freyr: All I want is paternal approval... *is muffin*
Freyr: Oh, hey, Mom! how're you doing? Care to come berate Dad for not accepting me?
Gunn: Oh sure just HOSHIT
Nemo (dorkasaur): Hey, kiddo! How's life?
Gunn: Actually, it's ...uh... oh dear.
What will become of Gunn? Can Agu show real affection towards Freyr? Is this Legacy ever going to have a fucking fourth generation? All to be revealed soon enough... next time with the Baldrssons!
Sweet Vishnu, it's been months! Three of them! I'm going to apologize, but I'm also going to make excuses. School. Work. D&D. Being social. Almost makes me want to go back to holing up in here and just Simming all the time. Enough blather! Last time, the sprogs all went to college and formed cliques under mildly ISBI-esque conditions. Syn and Gefjun became true clones. Freyr, the heir, became infatuated with a fellow named Brady. Vör dropped out. Vale got in a fight with a dormie. Freyr became a vampire. And half the kids were on academic probation. Now, we continue with...
Beakster MacSuitsy: You know, my father has a wonderful little beach resort on Tropical Island You've Never Heard Of.
Fulla: Huh.
BMS: I could always... take you there.
Fulla: Really? You'd... you'd take a girl like me?
BMS: Sure! We could hit the bar and go running on the beach or you could just lie around in a tiny bikini...
Fulla: omgomgomgomgomgomg so confused
Syn: *will lock them in a closet together later*
Geez, Vidar. You could have let it sit out a little longer. (Not visible: mile-long stink trail.)
Melody: Hey, sweetcheeks, I know I just insulted your shirt, but it's only because it doesn't do justice to how amazingly hot you are. Call me?
Vale: But... gayyy DDD8
Melody: We'll just have to change that, WON'T WE
Vale: Silly delusional psycho-bitch! Sexuality is a complex combination of several environmental and genetic factors and their effects on the psyche! Logical smackdown!
Audience: PREACH
BMS: You know, I never knew where the term “flamingly gay” came from...
Melody: Your argument cannot penetrate my thick skull! ...but your pe -
Vale: I will call the cops unless that sentence changes direction now.
Nemesis: I don't even know what I did. I just want to be friends with her. Is that so hard? ...Fulla, are you listening?
And the dropouts drop out, reducing the number of fights per day to zero.
Skeevy Dormie: hehehegaysex.
Aw, true love. Unfortunately, you're not p_t and turning you into a vampire would only mean hastily shoving you into an untimely demise.
That glitch. Fuckin' - Everything. Ruined.
All fun and games in the dorm.
Freyr: You know I love you, right?
Brady: Yes...?
Freyr: So... you'll realize that it has nothing to do with you when I say that we can't be together after college.
Brady: Okay, who is feeding you that bullshit? Why the hell not?
Freyr: It's according to some rather arbitrary rules set out by the Creator specifically for my family. Same reason I'm a vampire. It's just... divine judgment and stuff, you know? I don't want to piss Him off. He's got laser-precise plagues of flies.
Freyr: However, I'm sure He wouldn't mind much if I were to still love you... on the side?
Freyr: Hey, beautiful! You're too pretty to get shunned by your boyfriend after proposing a perfectly reasonable solution to your problems, aren't y -
Freyr: WELL FUCK YOUR MOTHER TOO
Vidar: Gosh, I can't imagine not being able to face this emblem of manliness whenever I want!
What?
Gefjun: I AM STILL A VIRGIN WTH
Uh, so are all of your siblings.
Gefjun: What, even Freyr?
Freyr: Hey, stop it, no, don't - I am trying to heal you, ladies!
Especially Freyr.
And thus the graduations begin! I did not feel like throwing a party. See your around, Vidar.
Freyr: ...that was odd.
And the man himself!
...I don't remember whether he was wearing pants.
But regardless! He moves back in with Gunnlöð and Agu (prettypalisades), and a new weekly challenge appears:
Can't Catch a Break: your sims' worst fears are realised. Attempt to fulfill as many fears for each sim every single day as possible.
Oh, I'm sure I'll be able to revamp him as soon as the week is over.
MM: Thanks for calling. What can I help you with?
Freyr: Oh, nothing much. I just have a couple of questions.
MM: I see. Lovely, beautiful, sunny day, isn't it?
Freyr: Well, I suppose soOOOOH SHIT HELP
MM: Here, drink this. It'll fix all that.
Freyr: Aw, thanks!
For best results, apply directly to throat.
Freyr: Hey, are you sure this isn't a bad batch or something? I can still feel my bladder boili...
MM: Ugh! Well, it worked, right...?
Freyr: Sure. Yeah. Care to put on a warning about that?
Freyr: At least I'm getting new pants in a moment.
MM: Right, about that. §60, sucker.
Gunn: I'm sure it is, Mr. Sixx. I'm sure it is.
Meanwhile, Freyr has a until-recently-quite-appropriate shirt.
In which he spends most of his time moping that it isn't appropriate any more.
His mopey face will be remembered for generations to come.
Sabastian (pinkposeysims): You know, actually, your life has gotten too peaceful. I am not pleased to see you.
Gunn: But... but I haven't re-seduced you yet D:
Sabastian: Don't bother.
Gunn: *heartborken!*
Brady: Oh hey Freyr I guess you're still under oath to some invisible being aren't ymmph.
Brady: Wait, what do you mean, “wrestle”?
Brady: Wow, that was gre -
Freyr: Yeah I know kthxbai
And Brady was never heard from or seen again.
Melody: Brady told me what you did to him!
Freyr: Whatever! I don't want to see your crazy carcass here anyways!
Freyr: I AM TIRED OF THIS SHIT! Can I be a vampire again??
No.
Freyr: D'AWWW WHY
Gunn's Fuckbuddy from College: WHAT! I was not informed that you would move on after not seeing me for decades! HARLOT!
Agu: Hee hee, cheating on me all those times finally comes and bites you in the ass.
Ryker: *mindborken!*
Freyr: Hey, Dad! Guess who just got a job with a massive paycheque?
Agu: Oh? OH?
Agu: HDU BE SUCCESSFUL AND HAPPY
Freyr: What the hell, Dad!
Agu: I am not your father.
Freyr: I knew that, you moron! What the hell is your problem?!
Agu: My problem is that you are not my son! Every time I look at you, I am reminded of your mother's cheating ways! When you were chosen as heir, it was a stab at my very identity and masculinity, to have dedicated so much of my life to loving and raising my children only to not have my genes passed on!
Agu: But at least now it's you who'll have to change my diapers when I go dotty.
Freyr: And I will do it with love, you old bastard.
Ivy: Um... was I supposed to see that?
Freyr: NO.
Ivy: I'm sorry, I sho -
Freyr: GET THE FUCK OUT.
Agu: Ah, Calvin's mood improvement technique. :)
Of course, all is forgiven eight seconds later.
Shocking.
Freyr: So yeah! Now I have a jooob and I'm making moneyyy and maybe soon I'll have a family and you'll get grandkids or something but mostly I have a job and I can skill and stuff.
Agu: I don't like this "job" business. I tried it. Didn't like it at all.
Freyr: All I want is paternal approval... *is muffin*
Freyr: Oh, hey, Mom! how're you doing? Care to come berate Dad for not accepting me?
Gunn: Oh sure just HOSHIT
Nemo (dorkasaur): Hey, kiddo! How's life?
Gunn: Actually, it's ...uh... oh dear.
What will become of Gunn? Can Agu show real affection towards Freyr? Is this Legacy ever going to have a fucking fourth generation? All to be revealed soon enough... next time with the Baldrssons!