November 25, 2007
It's been an amazing roller coaster ride of a week.
It started last week Friday. In group, I had a small confrontation with one of the girls. She's driving me a little nutty. (Yes, yes, rich coming from someone already attending group. I noticed this.) I told everyone about my improv show that Saturday night. Saturday rolls around, and I'm feeling really lazy. I don't get moving until 11. I have a personal training session at 12. I make it there on time, though; in fact, she's a bit late. After an ass-kicking workout, I need to leave. And quickly. A show that I'm obligated to see for intro to acting is playing at 1 and 7:30. Since my improv show is at 7:00, I'd best get there for the 1 o'clock showing.
Predictably, I'm five minutes late and tickets are no longer being sold. So I struggle against tears, and the house manager takes pity on me and lets me in. Amazing. Then I sat through this weird little show... Didn't care for it much at all. It was well acted-- I just didn't like it. Then I went and had food with Colette and Kirsten. Tasty tasty.
I help Joe move, which results in my being late for improv. Fortunately, our cast was miniscule so they let it slide. And Kirsten and Amber showed up. It made me so happy to know that two of my friends had shown up for something that mattered to me. We debated going to the movie Superbad after, but decided instead to go to Culver's, play in the park, and dip me in Lake Superior.
Culvers was amazing. As always. Playing in the park was fun. But dunking myself in Lake Superior with my friends supporting and encouraging me, was exhilerating and something I'll cherish for a good long time. It was life; and for a few moments, it was mine. Not society's, or American culture. Mine. It was the most amazing thing I've done, I think. Life is made to be experienced, and for those few brief moments, I did. After, we sat up until 2 playing Blurt, and a smidge of Scattergories.
Sunday and Monday were spent largely in anticipation of Thursday. Tuesday was the ride down which kicked ass, due to the musicals Bree, Jen and I watched on the way down. Wednesday was spent sleeping. And then Thursday rolled around...
Thanksgiving dinner. Family. And Luke. Rough housing with the kids, stealing alcohol from the back of my sister's car so I could be pleasant towards my parents, and eating next to Luke. I was so ecstatic when he showed up. We cuddled and baked and I met his friend Jessie. Jessie's great. We played Settler's, which I started to get a hang of after a while.
I've spent the past three days here, at his apartment, with him. And I'm grateful I've had it. My only misgivings are that I'm up and moving, and he's still snoring in his bed during my last hour here. But he's tired. And I'm a big girl-- I can get Plan B on my own. I just sort of wish I didn't have to. But in a way, it's for the best that I do it on my own. It's not his cross to bear either way. And this will help me grow.
I feel very melodramatic and unrequited love-y. But that, too, is an experience. One I'm glad I didn't miss.