(no subject)
I had therapy today. My new psychologist is really nice, which makes me feel kind of bad. For one thing, she's a woman, and I have serious trust issues there. Plus, when someone's overly nice to me it makes me paranoid, like they're just trying to lull me into a comfortable state before they try to pull something over on me. But really... she's been very respectful to me and understanding and suggests things to me to think about instead of trying to manipulate me into believing what she wants me to. And she reads me really well, which is kind of scary. She picks up on unspoken things I do, which I'm not used to having people do anymore. Today, she even moved over to sit next to me instead of across from me because she felt it was making me uncomfortable having her staring at me from across the room. And she sits in one of the patient area chairs when she talks to me instead of behind her desk. She even congratulated me and said it meant a lot to her just that I was able to come in and talk to her when I told her I have social anxiety disorder, so ... wow. I don't know what to think. I'd kind of set myself up to believe counseling wasn't going to work anymore, after what happened with my last one. Now this one's so nice, I don't want to... disappoint her, I guess. It's weird.
Anyway, we're not really working on any issues yet. Just talking and forming a "therapuetic trust level" or something like that. Today we talked about the standard five point system that explains how 50% of your mood is caused by your environment. Which I'd already known about, but that does explain a lot of my problems. heh.
Then, Brandon and I got Subway, which I always enjoy, and then we accidentally fell back asleep and slept until six pm. Hopefully, I'll still be able to sleep tonight cuz I have that "job readiness workshop" at 8 a.m. tomorrow and I'd imagine that's going to be boring as hell cuz it's just like an introduction to the phoenix workforce program where they set me up with another interview with a "career advisor" who will then set me up with things that should actually help me.
If my therapy actually goes well and causes me to confront issues I've been very successfully avoiding, that will be very hard to balance with a job, so I'm kind of worried about that. But I think I'll end up okay.
Anyway, being harassed again, so I'm gonna go.
Anyway, we're not really working on any issues yet. Just talking and forming a "therapuetic trust level" or something like that. Today we talked about the standard five point system that explains how 50% of your mood is caused by your environment. Which I'd already known about, but that does explain a lot of my problems. heh.
Then, Brandon and I got Subway, which I always enjoy, and then we accidentally fell back asleep and slept until six pm. Hopefully, I'll still be able to sleep tonight cuz I have that "job readiness workshop" at 8 a.m. tomorrow and I'd imagine that's going to be boring as hell cuz it's just like an introduction to the phoenix workforce program where they set me up with another interview with a "career advisor" who will then set me up with things that should actually help me.
If my therapy actually goes well and causes me to confront issues I've been very successfully avoiding, that will be very hard to balance with a job, so I'm kind of worried about that. But I think I'll end up okay.
Anyway, being harassed again, so I'm gonna go.