(no subject)
I feel weird tonight. I miss Juan alot. This is only the second week that we've been working opposite schedules...but it sucks balls. I don't see him at all. I wake up at 6am to work out and get ready for work...I go to work at 9. He goes to work at 2:30. I come home from work at 5:30. He comes home from work at 2:30am. Then I wake up at 6 again. I kiss him goodbye as I leave for work...and he kisses me hello as he comes home. I talk to him for a few on my lunch...he talks to me for a few on his lunch. That's it. And we have two more weeks (after this week) of this. It really sucks. I miss him. I'm not used to spending to much time away from him. I have to make myself "to-do" lists to keep myself busy. Otherwise I'm afraid I'll just sit around and mope...or watch tv or something. *sigh* I got spoiled.
Work has been alright. I made a couple of friends. They think it's weird that I don't go out...without Juan, that is. That's just how we are. We've never been into the bar scene...or club scene...or anything like that. We're both homebodies, I guess. We like to keep to ourselves. I don't know...is that weird? I keep joking that we're old, because we don't go out like most people our age...but we just aren't into it. I guess we're just boring, old people. Oh well.
I started my new health regimen...again. It's been hard for me to stay motivated. I work out inconsistently...and I eat good most days...but when I eat bad...I really eat bad. I think I have emotional triggers that make me eat. I don't know. I'm trying to have a healthy attitude about things, though. It's easy for me to resort back to old habits...and it's scary to even think it. But I thought about it long and hard.... The truth is...I want kids someday...and no matter how much I want to or how easy it would be for me to starve myself...it will only make my situation worse. I don't know. The key word is healthy. It's not the end of the world if I gain a few pounds, right? (<--Yes...actually it is. Or at least it feels like it.) Anyway...healthy.
I'm sleepy. I want to be lazy and just go to sleep right now...but I think I should do some yoga first. Someone please motivate me. I'm having trouble convincing myself of anything right now. I just wish I wasn't so depressed right now. And I wish I could stop saying..."right now". Geeeezzzz. Okay...here I go. See ya.
Work has been alright. I made a couple of friends. They think it's weird that I don't go out...without Juan, that is. That's just how we are. We've never been into the bar scene...or club scene...or anything like that. We're both homebodies, I guess. We like to keep to ourselves. I don't know...is that weird? I keep joking that we're old, because we don't go out like most people our age...but we just aren't into it. I guess we're just boring, old people. Oh well.
I started my new health regimen...again. It's been hard for me to stay motivated. I work out inconsistently...and I eat good most days...but when I eat bad...I really eat bad. I think I have emotional triggers that make me eat. I don't know. I'm trying to have a healthy attitude about things, though. It's easy for me to resort back to old habits...and it's scary to even think it. But I thought about it long and hard.... The truth is...I want kids someday...and no matter how much I want to or how easy it would be for me to starve myself...it will only make my situation worse. I don't know. The key word is healthy. It's not the end of the world if I gain a few pounds, right? (<--Yes...actually it is. Or at least it feels like it.) Anyway...healthy.
I'm sleepy. I want to be lazy and just go to sleep right now...but I think I should do some yoga first. Someone please motivate me. I'm having trouble convincing myself of anything right now. I just wish I wasn't so depressed right now. And I wish I could stop saying..."right now". Geeeezzzz. Okay...here I go. See ya.