[ST] Need a little Christmas
Title: Need a little Christmas
Author: castofone @ rushedwords
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing/Characters: Kirk/McCoy
Word count: 3236
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Bones wants Christmas to be perfect. Of course nothing goes to plan.
Notes: This was not the fic I intended to write when this started, but then life happened. So here it is.
space_wrapped !!
CHRISTMAS EVE
He felt like he should have seen this coming. He didn't get to be Captain of the flagship for his good looks. Well, not just for his good looks or his luck for that matter. Jim was sure that there has been clues, plenty of simple little things to warn him it would even like this, except he couldn’t seem to find a single one of them.
There had been that holo of Joanna at the Atlanta Christmas parade that showed up on his desk three weeks ago. Then there were those simple decorations that appeared around sickbay. It hadn’t been anything ostentatious, just cute little snowmen or bows. No one really questioned, the one time he asked Bones about it, he shrugged and said it was harming anyone.
It was hardly anything that suggested it would come to such a blow out.
Jim slumped back into the chair, looking over the thoughtfully lain out food spread. There was real honest to goodness food in front of them that had taken the better part of the day to prepare and not a single bite had been eaten.
“Well, I think that could have gone a lot better.”
TWELVE HOURS AGO
Given how far out they were, Enterprise wasn’t able to make it back for the holidays. Despite his best efforts, the best Jim could afford his crew was a two-day leave while a few system upgrades were underway.
While McCoy would have liked to be home for the holidays, he was glad to just have solid ground under his feet. He rented out a small house planet side with a proper kitchen, a fireplace and a bed with a mattress actually big enough for two full-grown men.
It wasn’t everything he needed, but it came as close as he was going to get.
And really, any day he woke up with Jim and time to spare was going to be a good day. This morning had been one of those. The men were slow in waking, content to let fingers, limbs, and lips fall wherever they would. It was lazy and sort of perfect in it’s own way.
However, McCoy did have plans for this evening. Despite Spock going on about eve being a vestigial mode of time and not applicable, McCoy did his math and he knew it was Christmas Eve. He had invited the senior officers a few of staff down for dinner, even enlisted a few to help prepare the honest to goodness food he had paid far too much to procure.
Apparently Jim had other plans because he was tugging on his golden tunic.
“Where are you going?” He asked, already fearing he knew the answer. “Jim? You said you would help me with dinner.”
"I know, Bones, but there's... this thing that I need to take care of on board."
Jim babbled on for a few minutes, McCoy’s incredulous eyebrow inching higher and higher. He stole a quick kiss and then darted out the door like a deer being hunted.
“You better be back here for dinner!” He shouted after Jim. “And I mean it, Jim! This is important!”
McCoy grumbled to himself as he went into the kitchen to start on the piecrust. “God damn kid, running when he ought to stay.” The next hour or so continued just like that, with McCoy muttering to himself about all of Jim’s issues, like he didn’t have a single one of them himself.
Nyota showed up not long after, letting herself into the house. And she really couldn’t have come at a better time.
“Thank god, I’m having a bit of an issue with these things that claim to be yams.” It was about as good as a greeting she was going to get, and at least the ranting delayed McCoy’s awareness that she wasn’t alone. "Why is he here?"
Now, strictly speaking McCoy didn’t have anything against Spock. Well, aside from that one time he nearly killed Jim, but even if they were trying to get along better it didn’t the Vulcan wouldn’t ruin Christmas.
“Apparently there’s some communications issue on the ship and I’ve been asked to consult and I thought you could use the help."
McCoy crossed his arms over his chest, tracking Spock as hung up his coats on the rack by the door. “I thought he was supposed to overseeing the upgrades because hob goblins don’t celebrate Christmas!”
Nyota gave him a sympathetic look. “It will be fine, just be nice to him, okay?” She squeezed his arm before turning to leave.
"Is insulting your guests also apart of your McCoy family Earth traditions?” Spock raised an eyebrow awaiting an answer he already knew.
All McCoy could do was grumble a bit louder and stomp into the kitchen. He was going to kill Jim later for this.
Even in the hour he had been at work, the kitchen was already in quite the state. “Doctor McCoy, are you sure you are capable of cooking an adequate meal?”
Nyota too while he was at it. He could kill them in one go, even make it look like an accident.
“Well, I can bake, and I mean how different can it be?” Of course, if the yams were any indication, it was very different to be making pies or cobbler to be cooking a whole turkey and the traditional sides.
“Then perhaps I can be of some assistance.”
McCoy didn’t like it, but he really didn’t see much choice in the matter. If there was going to be anything not sugar based to eat today, he was going to have play nice with Spock.
Surprisingly the two of them settled into an easy rhythm. It was all very direct and simple directions that McCoy didn’t balk at or argue too much. He would be hard pressed to admit it, but he sort enjoyed working with Spock.
Although that just made him wish that Jim was here because this should have been their thing. Although that way there would have been far more food thrown about, flour in his hair and questionable hygiene practices, but McCoy wouldn’t have told a soul.
"If it is not too forward of me, doctor, I am curious as to your passion behind this holiday. To my understanding it is an antiquated Earth custom."
"You really want to know?"
Spock inclined his head, invited McCoy to continue.
###
Up on Enterprise, Jim and Uhura were waiting for the turbolift to take them to the transporter room, chatting about their unexpected project. That was a new thing, this growing professional friendship with Uhura.
It made sense because Jim had grown up a lot since that bar in Riverside, but it was still weird to think that she would be counted among his friends. Admittedly she would be playfully less generous and claim that she was Len’s friends and only put up with him by extension. Jim Kirk still counted it as a win.
Then the doors to the turbolift opened. Chapel, M’Benga and Sulu were standing inside.
“What are you all doing here?” He asked, feeling his heart sink a little.
The set of them all exchanged looks, no one really having a good answer, but they all seemed to realize the issue at hand at the same time.
“Oh this is beyond bad.”
###
Back on the planet, the men sat around the table. At least the table had two more guests - Scotty and Keenser who had shown up around four with quite the supply of liquor that McCoy suspected he would need.
The food sat between them, the chronometer ticking by. The silence was broken only by the sound of ice clinking in glass tumblers. Despite the quality of the liquor, it did absolutely nothing to ease the tension weighing heavily in the air.
Scotty’s comm chirped, prompting him to give an apologetic smile as he turned off the alarm. “I’d hate to leave such a lovely spread of food untouched, but we really ought to be heading back to the ship.” He scratched the back of his head. “Keenser and I have a meeting with the brass and if we want those upgrades on time, we can’t be late.”
McCoy rose from his place at the head of the table to see them to the door. It seemed the sort of thing that a host might do. And if he held onto the hope that as he walked them to the door, Jim, Nyota, Christine, anyone might be bumbling toward the house with an honest apology as to why they were over a half hour late, well, he wasn’t going to tell anyone that.
He also should have known better than to get his hopes up. No one was at the door.
With a long-suffering sigh he walked back to the dining room to be greeted by the same sight he had left just a moment ago. Spock sitting on the other end of the table, perfect posture and face entirely neutral.
McCoy plopped down in his chair with such force the place setting jumped a little. “Hell you should just go. I’m sure you don’t exactly want to be here with me, even if it would be some sort of fascinating cultural experience watching a man sit alone at his Christmas table.”
Spock inclined his head as if considering the offer. “I believe it is customary to remain at the table until the host retires, is it not?”
“Yeah, well, no one is coming.” McCoy scrubbed his face. That was not how he pictures tonight going - not even close. He wasn’t expecting perfection; he just would have liked the idiots he did this for to show up.
“Even so, we should not let our labor be for nothing.
McCoy looked over the table and then at Spock. It was pathetic. That’s what this whole thing was - pathetic. He didn’t even want to look at any reminder of how miserable his life was at this moment.
“You go right ahead, I think I’m going to get another drink,” he said rising from the table again. Not that alcohol was solve the problem, but it was better than just sitting there a minute longer.
All the good alcohol was in the kitchen, which was just far enough away.
Back in the other room he could hear noise, but didn’t think too much of it. McCoy was already counting this night as a wash. He was just going to have another drink and then throw everything into the recycler to never be spoken of again.
Armed with the proper amount of liquor to get him through the next few minutes, he was greeted by quite the surprise in the dinning room. Like children caught out after curfew, Nyota, Christine and Jim were all just slipping into their seats.
“What the hell?”
“Well, hello there, Bones,” said Jim flashing a bright smile. It was almost enough to pull at his heartstrings, but this day had turned Bones into the reverse Grinch. His heart didn’t get three sizes bigger. “Sorry, we’re late. We found an issue with the communications array, which backlogged all of our requisitions and then once we finally come them working, Admiral Komack wanted to-”
“No.” He didn’t care who else was in the room. They were all friends here, although some friends he had.
“No?” Jim repeated like it was a foreign word to him and Bones supposed it could have been. “What do you mean by no?”
McCoy sighed. “Generally, Jim, when someone says no, they mean no.” He was not going to be lured by those blue eyes, confused and maybe a little hurt, because he was hurting too, damn it! “In the case it means, no I’m not doing this right now. We are on mandatory short leave, honest to God, actual leave and you promised me you would be here.”
Given their roles as Captain and CMO of the flagship, they didn’t often make promises. Both burned and weary, promises were reserved for only when it could be something that would actually follow through. McCoy had thought that this would be one of them. He threw back the rest of his drink savoring the burn because it muted the other emotions swirling around in his gut.
“You promised, Jim, and instead I spent the entire day with Spock. So, no, we’re not going to do this.”
“Bones,” Jim yelled after his fleeting form. “C’mon!”
But he was already gone.
###
Contrary to popular belief, Jim Kirk seldom got it right the first time. Sure, there was instinct and luck, but most of the times there was a process involved, a process where sometimes people got hurt. He had never expected ‘people’ to include Bones.
The only thing more surprising was how much it upset him. Or even that he was trusting Spock’s insight on how to fix things with Bones. Still, it was the best he had at the moment and he really didn’t like being at odds with Bones. So, if that meant heading out in search of him, well, for everything Bones did for him, it was the least Jim could do.
It turned out Bones didn’t get very far. He had slammed the front door and headed down to the dock off their back yard. Bones was perched at the far end of the dock. His shoes and socks were in a pile next to him, so that when his feet dangled his toes could touch the water.
Jim stood at the shore watching Bones for a moment, hoping a moment might present itself. When none did he took off his boots and padded down the dock. He wasn’t silent about his approach, but Bones made no sign that he heard the other man.
“You know, I hear that you can catch a whole variety of diseases doing something like that,” he said, plopping down next to Bones, their shoulders brushing.
Bones glanced over at him, well, not so much glanced as glared before he looked back out at the creek.
For anyone else, Jim might have asked for an explanation, but he knew the way to get Bones to speak was to wait him out. So, he let his gaze follow Bones, looking over the landscape. The setting sun cast long shadows over the creek and the hills on the other side. The sky was a fantastic swirl of colors. While it looked nothing like Earth, it was reminiscent of what Jim imagined Bones grew up around.
Jim had only been to the McCoy homestead once before they shipped out a few months ago now. The place was something else. No, that wasn’t right, the place was entirely Leonard McCoy with a porch so big it could never be full and landscaping so diverse and large no single person could ever manage it alone.
“I just wanted everyone to have a good holiday,” said Bones like the words were being pulled from him. His gaze was focused down on his toes, making little figure eights in the water. “I wanted us to have memories that weren’t about phasers or hyposprays. I wanted you to have one God damn day where you didn’t have to be savior of the universe and you could be whatever you wanted.”
Jim shifted on the dock, so he was entirely facing Bones. It was like he was seeing him for the first time. He had known Leonard McCoy for four years now and he was still learning things.
“Bones.” When he didn’t look at Jim, he tried again. “Leonard.” That caught his gaze. “I don’t need all of this stuff. I would have been happy with just you and me, making something simple, having a few drinks and just having a night in, clothing very optional. And you know that.”
“I like Christmas is all.”
“Bullshit.” Bones arched a perfect eyebrow, daring Jim to go down that road. “I mean you’re not exactly a dozens of presents and holiday crowds sort of person.”
“Can’t you just leave it alone?”
Jim didn’t answer that question. There wasn’t an answer he could give that would satisfy.
“I just don’t want to forgot, okay?” Bones scrubbed his face, a sigh escaping and loosening those lips. “We spend so much of our lives in the black, going by a stardate that barely means anything because we get planet side, or on a base and it’s morning when it should be afternoon and the day all just blend together. We don’t breathe real air, and it’s all just artificial, and sometimes I think I forget what dirt smells like. And no, I’m not a presents, holiday crowds sort of person, but I like the tradition. I like the roots it gives me because it reminds me of Joanna and all of those stupid Christmas things I would attend because it made her happy and that made me happy.”
It was all far too honest - what he said, what he meant. Jim didn’t know what to say, so did the only thing he could think of.
“You do know that I’m Jewish, right?” Bones groaned covering up the vulnerability in his voice and Jim laughed. Jim’s extent of practicing religion meant going to temple once a year. He never thought that one day would let him atone, but it was a nice thought. “Seriously, I’m all about the dreidels and the gelt, or you know strip dreidel - totally a thing.”
And that prompted Bones to do the only thing he could to get Jim to shut up. He kissed him.
They had kissed each other dozens if not hundreds of times before and their lips and limbs still stumbled, trying to figure out where they went. Each time it was different. Each time it was new, saying dozens of things and nothing at all.
They were both two men lost at sea. Only they didn’t respond to it the same. Bones would always be searching for the familiar on the horizon and Jim, he preferred to be floating or falling, sometimes both. Or at least he used to. Now, he only liked that if he could have Bones around to catch him, to anchor him deep within something real, something solid.
Jim and Bones stayed like that, sitting on the edge of the dock wrapped up in each other as the sun set on the horizon casting the land in darkness.
“You ready to go back? I’m sure everyone is still waiting.”
“I don’t know,” said McCoy. “I sort of like it right here.”
After dark the place was a different type of pretty from what it had been during the day. The local equivalent of fireflies lighting up the sky mixing in with the stars above.
There was nothing more to say after that. McCoy just slung his arm over Jim’s shoulder, pulling him closer, as he gazed out at the horizon. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for, but he hoped that when he saw it, he would know.
Unknown to him, Jim had found exactly what he was looking for in the impossible man sitting next to him. It might the perfect Christmas, or even the perfect anything, but it was Jim and Bones. And while he might be biased, he thought that was enough.
Author: castofone @ rushedwords
Fandom: Star Trek XI
Pairing/Characters: Kirk/McCoy
Word count: 3236
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Bones wants Christmas to be perfect. Of course nothing goes to plan.
Notes: This was not the fic I intended to write when this started, but then life happened. So here it is.
space_wrapped !!
CHRISTMAS EVE
He felt like he should have seen this coming. He didn't get to be Captain of the flagship for his good looks. Well, not just for his good looks or his luck for that matter. Jim was sure that there has been clues, plenty of simple little things to warn him it would even like this, except he couldn’t seem to find a single one of them.
There had been that holo of Joanna at the Atlanta Christmas parade that showed up on his desk three weeks ago. Then there were those simple decorations that appeared around sickbay. It hadn’t been anything ostentatious, just cute little snowmen or bows. No one really questioned, the one time he asked Bones about it, he shrugged and said it was harming anyone.
It was hardly anything that suggested it would come to such a blow out.
Jim slumped back into the chair, looking over the thoughtfully lain out food spread. There was real honest to goodness food in front of them that had taken the better part of the day to prepare and not a single bite had been eaten.
“Well, I think that could have gone a lot better.”
TWELVE HOURS AGO
Given how far out they were, Enterprise wasn’t able to make it back for the holidays. Despite his best efforts, the best Jim could afford his crew was a two-day leave while a few system upgrades were underway.
While McCoy would have liked to be home for the holidays, he was glad to just have solid ground under his feet. He rented out a small house planet side with a proper kitchen, a fireplace and a bed with a mattress actually big enough for two full-grown men.
It wasn’t everything he needed, but it came as close as he was going to get.
And really, any day he woke up with Jim and time to spare was going to be a good day. This morning had been one of those. The men were slow in waking, content to let fingers, limbs, and lips fall wherever they would. It was lazy and sort of perfect in it’s own way.
However, McCoy did have plans for this evening. Despite Spock going on about eve being a vestigial mode of time and not applicable, McCoy did his math and he knew it was Christmas Eve. He had invited the senior officers a few of staff down for dinner, even enlisted a few to help prepare the honest to goodness food he had paid far too much to procure.
Apparently Jim had other plans because he was tugging on his golden tunic.
“Where are you going?” He asked, already fearing he knew the answer. “Jim? You said you would help me with dinner.”
"I know, Bones, but there's... this thing that I need to take care of on board."
Jim babbled on for a few minutes, McCoy’s incredulous eyebrow inching higher and higher. He stole a quick kiss and then darted out the door like a deer being hunted.
“You better be back here for dinner!” He shouted after Jim. “And I mean it, Jim! This is important!”
McCoy grumbled to himself as he went into the kitchen to start on the piecrust. “God damn kid, running when he ought to stay.” The next hour or so continued just like that, with McCoy muttering to himself about all of Jim’s issues, like he didn’t have a single one of them himself.
Nyota showed up not long after, letting herself into the house. And she really couldn’t have come at a better time.
“Thank god, I’m having a bit of an issue with these things that claim to be yams.” It was about as good as a greeting she was going to get, and at least the ranting delayed McCoy’s awareness that she wasn’t alone. "Why is he here?"
Now, strictly speaking McCoy didn’t have anything against Spock. Well, aside from that one time he nearly killed Jim, but even if they were trying to get along better it didn’t the Vulcan wouldn’t ruin Christmas.
“Apparently there’s some communications issue on the ship and I’ve been asked to consult and I thought you could use the help."
McCoy crossed his arms over his chest, tracking Spock as hung up his coats on the rack by the door. “I thought he was supposed to overseeing the upgrades because hob goblins don’t celebrate Christmas!”
Nyota gave him a sympathetic look. “It will be fine, just be nice to him, okay?” She squeezed his arm before turning to leave.
"Is insulting your guests also apart of your McCoy family Earth traditions?” Spock raised an eyebrow awaiting an answer he already knew.
All McCoy could do was grumble a bit louder and stomp into the kitchen. He was going to kill Jim later for this.
Even in the hour he had been at work, the kitchen was already in quite the state. “Doctor McCoy, are you sure you are capable of cooking an adequate meal?”
Nyota too while he was at it. He could kill them in one go, even make it look like an accident.
“Well, I can bake, and I mean how different can it be?” Of course, if the yams were any indication, it was very different to be making pies or cobbler to be cooking a whole turkey and the traditional sides.
“Then perhaps I can be of some assistance.”
McCoy didn’t like it, but he really didn’t see much choice in the matter. If there was going to be anything not sugar based to eat today, he was going to have play nice with Spock.
Surprisingly the two of them settled into an easy rhythm. It was all very direct and simple directions that McCoy didn’t balk at or argue too much. He would be hard pressed to admit it, but he sort enjoyed working with Spock.
Although that just made him wish that Jim was here because this should have been their thing. Although that way there would have been far more food thrown about, flour in his hair and questionable hygiene practices, but McCoy wouldn’t have told a soul.
"If it is not too forward of me, doctor, I am curious as to your passion behind this holiday. To my understanding it is an antiquated Earth custom."
"You really want to know?"
Spock inclined his head, invited McCoy to continue.
###
Up on Enterprise, Jim and Uhura were waiting for the turbolift to take them to the transporter room, chatting about their unexpected project. That was a new thing, this growing professional friendship with Uhura.
It made sense because Jim had grown up a lot since that bar in Riverside, but it was still weird to think that she would be counted among his friends. Admittedly she would be playfully less generous and claim that she was Len’s friends and only put up with him by extension. Jim Kirk still counted it as a win.
Then the doors to the turbolift opened. Chapel, M’Benga and Sulu were standing inside.
“What are you all doing here?” He asked, feeling his heart sink a little.
The set of them all exchanged looks, no one really having a good answer, but they all seemed to realize the issue at hand at the same time.
“Oh this is beyond bad.”
###
Back on the planet, the men sat around the table. At least the table had two more guests - Scotty and Keenser who had shown up around four with quite the supply of liquor that McCoy suspected he would need.
The food sat between them, the chronometer ticking by. The silence was broken only by the sound of ice clinking in glass tumblers. Despite the quality of the liquor, it did absolutely nothing to ease the tension weighing heavily in the air.
Scotty’s comm chirped, prompting him to give an apologetic smile as he turned off the alarm. “I’d hate to leave such a lovely spread of food untouched, but we really ought to be heading back to the ship.” He scratched the back of his head. “Keenser and I have a meeting with the brass and if we want those upgrades on time, we can’t be late.”
McCoy rose from his place at the head of the table to see them to the door. It seemed the sort of thing that a host might do. And if he held onto the hope that as he walked them to the door, Jim, Nyota, Christine, anyone might be bumbling toward the house with an honest apology as to why they were over a half hour late, well, he wasn’t going to tell anyone that.
He also should have known better than to get his hopes up. No one was at the door.
With a long-suffering sigh he walked back to the dining room to be greeted by the same sight he had left just a moment ago. Spock sitting on the other end of the table, perfect posture and face entirely neutral.
McCoy plopped down in his chair with such force the place setting jumped a little. “Hell you should just go. I’m sure you don’t exactly want to be here with me, even if it would be some sort of fascinating cultural experience watching a man sit alone at his Christmas table.”
Spock inclined his head as if considering the offer. “I believe it is customary to remain at the table until the host retires, is it not?”
“Yeah, well, no one is coming.” McCoy scrubbed his face. That was not how he pictures tonight going - not even close. He wasn’t expecting perfection; he just would have liked the idiots he did this for to show up.
“Even so, we should not let our labor be for nothing.
McCoy looked over the table and then at Spock. It was pathetic. That’s what this whole thing was - pathetic. He didn’t even want to look at any reminder of how miserable his life was at this moment.
“You go right ahead, I think I’m going to get another drink,” he said rising from the table again. Not that alcohol was solve the problem, but it was better than just sitting there a minute longer.
All the good alcohol was in the kitchen, which was just far enough away.
Back in the other room he could hear noise, but didn’t think too much of it. McCoy was already counting this night as a wash. He was just going to have another drink and then throw everything into the recycler to never be spoken of again.
Armed with the proper amount of liquor to get him through the next few minutes, he was greeted by quite the surprise in the dinning room. Like children caught out after curfew, Nyota, Christine and Jim were all just slipping into their seats.
“What the hell?”
“Well, hello there, Bones,” said Jim flashing a bright smile. It was almost enough to pull at his heartstrings, but this day had turned Bones into the reverse Grinch. His heart didn’t get three sizes bigger. “Sorry, we’re late. We found an issue with the communications array, which backlogged all of our requisitions and then once we finally come them working, Admiral Komack wanted to-”
“No.” He didn’t care who else was in the room. They were all friends here, although some friends he had.
“No?” Jim repeated like it was a foreign word to him and Bones supposed it could have been. “What do you mean by no?”
McCoy sighed. “Generally, Jim, when someone says no, they mean no.” He was not going to be lured by those blue eyes, confused and maybe a little hurt, because he was hurting too, damn it! “In the case it means, no I’m not doing this right now. We are on mandatory short leave, honest to God, actual leave and you promised me you would be here.”
Given their roles as Captain and CMO of the flagship, they didn’t often make promises. Both burned and weary, promises were reserved for only when it could be something that would actually follow through. McCoy had thought that this would be one of them. He threw back the rest of his drink savoring the burn because it muted the other emotions swirling around in his gut.
“You promised, Jim, and instead I spent the entire day with Spock. So, no, we’re not going to do this.”
“Bones,” Jim yelled after his fleeting form. “C’mon!”
But he was already gone.
###
Contrary to popular belief, Jim Kirk seldom got it right the first time. Sure, there was instinct and luck, but most of the times there was a process involved, a process where sometimes people got hurt. He had never expected ‘people’ to include Bones.
The only thing more surprising was how much it upset him. Or even that he was trusting Spock’s insight on how to fix things with Bones. Still, it was the best he had at the moment and he really didn’t like being at odds with Bones. So, if that meant heading out in search of him, well, for everything Bones did for him, it was the least Jim could do.
It turned out Bones didn’t get very far. He had slammed the front door and headed down to the dock off their back yard. Bones was perched at the far end of the dock. His shoes and socks were in a pile next to him, so that when his feet dangled his toes could touch the water.
Jim stood at the shore watching Bones for a moment, hoping a moment might present itself. When none did he took off his boots and padded down the dock. He wasn’t silent about his approach, but Bones made no sign that he heard the other man.
“You know, I hear that you can catch a whole variety of diseases doing something like that,” he said, plopping down next to Bones, their shoulders brushing.
Bones glanced over at him, well, not so much glanced as glared before he looked back out at the creek.
For anyone else, Jim might have asked for an explanation, but he knew the way to get Bones to speak was to wait him out. So, he let his gaze follow Bones, looking over the landscape. The setting sun cast long shadows over the creek and the hills on the other side. The sky was a fantastic swirl of colors. While it looked nothing like Earth, it was reminiscent of what Jim imagined Bones grew up around.
Jim had only been to the McCoy homestead once before they shipped out a few months ago now. The place was something else. No, that wasn’t right, the place was entirely Leonard McCoy with a porch so big it could never be full and landscaping so diverse and large no single person could ever manage it alone.
“I just wanted everyone to have a good holiday,” said Bones like the words were being pulled from him. His gaze was focused down on his toes, making little figure eights in the water. “I wanted us to have memories that weren’t about phasers or hyposprays. I wanted you to have one God damn day where you didn’t have to be savior of the universe and you could be whatever you wanted.”
Jim shifted on the dock, so he was entirely facing Bones. It was like he was seeing him for the first time. He had known Leonard McCoy for four years now and he was still learning things.
“Bones.” When he didn’t look at Jim, he tried again. “Leonard.” That caught his gaze. “I don’t need all of this stuff. I would have been happy with just you and me, making something simple, having a few drinks and just having a night in, clothing very optional. And you know that.”
“I like Christmas is all.”
“Bullshit.” Bones arched a perfect eyebrow, daring Jim to go down that road. “I mean you’re not exactly a dozens of presents and holiday crowds sort of person.”
“Can’t you just leave it alone?”
Jim didn’t answer that question. There wasn’t an answer he could give that would satisfy.
“I just don’t want to forgot, okay?” Bones scrubbed his face, a sigh escaping and loosening those lips. “We spend so much of our lives in the black, going by a stardate that barely means anything because we get planet side, or on a base and it’s morning when it should be afternoon and the day all just blend together. We don’t breathe real air, and it’s all just artificial, and sometimes I think I forget what dirt smells like. And no, I’m not a presents, holiday crowds sort of person, but I like the tradition. I like the roots it gives me because it reminds me of Joanna and all of those stupid Christmas things I would attend because it made her happy and that made me happy.”
It was all far too honest - what he said, what he meant. Jim didn’t know what to say, so did the only thing he could think of.
“You do know that I’m Jewish, right?” Bones groaned covering up the vulnerability in his voice and Jim laughed. Jim’s extent of practicing religion meant going to temple once a year. He never thought that one day would let him atone, but it was a nice thought. “Seriously, I’m all about the dreidels and the gelt, or you know strip dreidel - totally a thing.”
And that prompted Bones to do the only thing he could to get Jim to shut up. He kissed him.
They had kissed each other dozens if not hundreds of times before and their lips and limbs still stumbled, trying to figure out where they went. Each time it was different. Each time it was new, saying dozens of things and nothing at all.
They were both two men lost at sea. Only they didn’t respond to it the same. Bones would always be searching for the familiar on the horizon and Jim, he preferred to be floating or falling, sometimes both. Or at least he used to. Now, he only liked that if he could have Bones around to catch him, to anchor him deep within something real, something solid.
Jim and Bones stayed like that, sitting on the edge of the dock wrapped up in each other as the sun set on the horizon casting the land in darkness.
“You ready to go back? I’m sure everyone is still waiting.”
“I don’t know,” said McCoy. “I sort of like it right here.”
After dark the place was a different type of pretty from what it had been during the day. The local equivalent of fireflies lighting up the sky mixing in with the stars above.
There was nothing more to say after that. McCoy just slung his arm over Jim’s shoulder, pulling him closer, as he gazed out at the horizon. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for, but he hoped that when he saw it, he would know.
Unknown to him, Jim had found exactly what he was looking for in the impossible man sitting next to him. It might the perfect Christmas, or even the perfect anything, but it was Jim and Bones. And while he might be biased, he thought that was enough.