Online Hiatus / Birthday Depression.
Please excuse my online activity hiatus, but I believe this will continue for another extended period of time. I am sure no one has really missed me. I don't know, "real life" beckons, however drifty that life is. I wish I could blog more, but I am too lazy or I feel too empty of words.
I am currently in a sexual relationship with a 21 year old kid, B. I don't know how it happened as we are extreme polar opposites. The only thing we have in common are the physical attributes - we are physically attracted to each other, we fuck like bunnies, and we both want to improve and shape our physical bodies. Aside from that, we have nothing else in common. He eats junk food and I eat the grassy, vegetable remainders. Actually, that part works out pretty well. I don't know how he stays so fit. I cannot stress enough on the fact that he's got the best, most ideal body I've ever bedded, mainly because that may be the only positive thing I can stress on. Ha ha, okay, well, there are other endearing qualities to him. He gets extremely jealous, which is nice because I think it shows that I mean something to him, but I could be wrong. His jealousy, though, is a problem because he becomes tempermental to the point of scaring me. Other times, I have to go out of my way to ensure things are okay between us. He has other fetching character traits, such as his "sweet talk" and his affectionate nature when it befits him. He has the prettiest blue/green eyes, but I can never tell what's lurking behind them and that unsettles me. Sometimes when he trains his eyes on me, I think it is good, other times, I think I see a storm brewing behind them. I know he has trouble trusting people. He can be quite playful and he enjoys seeing how far he can push my guillible nature before I realize what he is doing. I think that is cute once I get over the irritation of being so damned easy to manipulate. Other times, I think it's frightening that it is so easy for him to be able to lead me to believe these outrageous things. Maybe I trust too easily.
I am wearing B's shirt right now and it still retains his smell of Axe.
I love it. It reminds me of him.
Here's another bad thing about him.
He hates the use of condoms and has several times had his way on this matter. I have cried and felt like shit afterwards.
And now. I'm going to cross post a...
MYSPACE BULLETIN
Topic: Birthday Depression
I think the reason I'm not excited about celebrating the quarter century of being alive on earth is the fact that:
A. The two most important people in my life that have always been celebrating my birthdays with me for the past several years are no longer with me due to being away at FSU and AUA
B. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO FOR MY BIRTHDAY
C. I don't think I have enough friends who are even going to attend anything I plan out because it's going to be given at a superlate notice anway
D. I've never had a surprise party yet, why doesn't someone do that for me already?
E. I am in a strange, drifty, uncertain "relationship" situation which is tearing me apart.
Maybe I'll do the iceskating thing again, but I did it last year and maybe it's getting old. And then sushi because what can ever go wrong with having an abundance of sushi? Although I have strangely been craving Cheesecake Factory, but I bet that is due to the important person being M-I-A in my life and I am trying to fill that hole with food, specifically the favorite cuisine of said important person.
I am currently in a sexual relationship with a 21 year old kid, B. I don't know how it happened as we are extreme polar opposites. The only thing we have in common are the physical attributes - we are physically attracted to each other, we fuck like bunnies, and we both want to improve and shape our physical bodies. Aside from that, we have nothing else in common. He eats junk food and I eat the grassy, vegetable remainders. Actually, that part works out pretty well. I don't know how he stays so fit. I cannot stress enough on the fact that he's got the best, most ideal body I've ever bedded, mainly because that may be the only positive thing I can stress on. Ha ha, okay, well, there are other endearing qualities to him. He gets extremely jealous, which is nice because I think it shows that I mean something to him, but I could be wrong. His jealousy, though, is a problem because he becomes tempermental to the point of scaring me. Other times, I have to go out of my way to ensure things are okay between us. He has other fetching character traits, such as his "sweet talk" and his affectionate nature when it befits him. He has the prettiest blue/green eyes, but I can never tell what's lurking behind them and that unsettles me. Sometimes when he trains his eyes on me, I think it is good, other times, I think I see a storm brewing behind them. I know he has trouble trusting people. He can be quite playful and he enjoys seeing how far he can push my guillible nature before I realize what he is doing. I think that is cute once I get over the irritation of being so damned easy to manipulate. Other times, I think it's frightening that it is so easy for him to be able to lead me to believe these outrageous things. Maybe I trust too easily.
I am wearing B's shirt right now and it still retains his smell of Axe.
I love it. It reminds me of him.
Here's another bad thing about him.
He hates the use of condoms and has several times had his way on this matter. I have cried and felt like shit afterwards.
And now. I'm going to cross post a...
MYSPACE BULLETIN
Topic: Birthday Depression
I think the reason I'm not excited about celebrating the quarter century of being alive on earth is the fact that:
A. The two most important people in my life that have always been celebrating my birthdays with me for the past several years are no longer with me due to being away at FSU and AUA
B. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO FOR MY BIRTHDAY
C. I don't think I have enough friends who are even going to attend anything I plan out because it's going to be given at a superlate notice anway
D. I've never had a surprise party yet, why doesn't someone do that for me already?
E. I am in a strange, drifty, uncertain "relationship" situation which is tearing me apart.
Maybe I'll do the iceskating thing again, but I did it last year and maybe it's getting old. And then sushi because what can ever go wrong with having an abundance of sushi? Although I have strangely been craving Cheesecake Factory, but I bet that is due to the important person being M-I-A in my life and I am trying to fill that hole with food, specifically the favorite cuisine of said important person.