54.
I'm not afraid that I've made a mistake.
I'm not afraid of anything, now.
I just get really lonely.
Even when I've been single, I haven't been alone. There was always someone. Even know, I'm not alone. I'm lonely. I suppose after being in a relationship for over a year for the first time, being single is supposed to be lonely.
I'm still in the process of moving out. The longer it takes the more numb I feel to it all. I'm not sure I like that. In a sense, the Three Days Grace song is right, "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all." And it's weird. When I hang out with Mak, it isn't sad like I expected it to be. In fact, I'm not sad until I'm going home at night. The drive to Union County isn't long. It's lonely.
And it's hard to find things to do throughout the day. I had grown so accustomed to always having the apartment to go to when I had nothing else to do. I could go home now, I guess, but the apartment was always right in the middle of everything. Now I find myself wandering around Knoxville. Sure, I still hang out with my friends, but they are either asleep or working when I get out of class. And I don't mind wandering alone around my town. It's just lonely.
So here I am, feeling lonely. But I don't want anyone's sympathy. I don't want people to call me and want to hang out. I feel like this loneliness is right. If I can make it through this, I can do anything.
And I already know I can.
-the Butterfly.
I'm not afraid of anything, now.
I just get really lonely.
Even when I've been single, I haven't been alone. There was always someone. Even know, I'm not alone. I'm lonely. I suppose after being in a relationship for over a year for the first time, being single is supposed to be lonely.
I'm still in the process of moving out. The longer it takes the more numb I feel to it all. I'm not sure I like that. In a sense, the Three Days Grace song is right, "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all." And it's weird. When I hang out with Mak, it isn't sad like I expected it to be. In fact, I'm not sad until I'm going home at night. The drive to Union County isn't long. It's lonely.
And it's hard to find things to do throughout the day. I had grown so accustomed to always having the apartment to go to when I had nothing else to do. I could go home now, I guess, but the apartment was always right in the middle of everything. Now I find myself wandering around Knoxville. Sure, I still hang out with my friends, but they are either asleep or working when I get out of class. And I don't mind wandering alone around my town. It's just lonely.
So here I am, feeling lonely. But I don't want anyone's sympathy. I don't want people to call me and want to hang out. I feel like this loneliness is right. If I can make it through this, I can do anything.
And I already know I can.
-the Butterfly.