Missed and Taken Chances (Guiding Light, Natalia / Olivia)
Name: Missed and Taken Chances
Author: Rune Traverse
Fandom: Guiding Light
Pairing: Otalia (Olivia / Natalia)
Rating: PG - a few minor swear words, I think.
Summary: When Olivia gets in an accident, Natalia decides to take her chances.
AN: Because Tallis practically gift-wrapped the damned plotbunny, this one goes to her. Much love, my purple chica. ^^
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Oh please, God, no -
Natalia Rivera had never considered herself much of a runner. Oh, she knew she had the legs for it - long and lean, muscles made strong from uncounted hours waiting tables and rushing to appointments. And if the conditions were right - say, hurrying to catch a bus when Rafe was small, or playing with Emma at the playground - she knew she could do short sprints without even a thought. Still, it wasn’t something she enjoyed, and she was usually content with a fast walk at most.
So the fact that she was presently flying down the sidewalk as fast as her legs could carry her was a bit of a surprise. Or at least, it would be, if she had been focused on anything other than the pounding of her heart and the screaming in her head.
Olivia, Olivia - God, please, Olivia -
A crisp gust of wind whipped her hair in her face, but Natalia cleared her eyes with a jerky shake of her head, gulping cold air into her already tortured lungs. Five minutes ago, she’d been on the phone with Olivia, juggling a bag of fresh-baked apple fritters and a drink carrier jammed with two cups of hot coffee as she left Company. The meeting they’d prepared for all yesterday had come off a brilliant success, and both women had decided on an impromptu “date” in the park to celebrate. They’d been doing that a lot in the week since the spa - random little ‘together’ times, small moments to help with feeling comfortable as a couple. The brunette suspected it was more for her benefit than anything else, a way to get over their ‘limbo’ and start going forward with their lives again. This time, Olivia had left Natalia at the diner to grab their snack, while she herself ran back to the Beacon and dropped off their paperwork. They planned to meet back at the park, in the gazebo.
Their conversation hadn’t been important, barely more than silly, teasing banter . . . yet it burned through Natalia’s mind, an endless loop of razor sharpness.
“Yeah, they’re hot out of the oven.” With a laugh, the Latina tucked her warm bundle into the crook of an elbow, the paper bag crackling pleasantly. A distracted wave to Buzz, and she pushed open the heavy door, trailing the scent of coffee behind her as she headed out into the open air. “But you totally knew that, didn’t you?”
“Me?” Olivia’s mock-surprise melted to a wicked smirk, audible even over the phone. “What, you doubted my finely-honed skill to locate baked goods?”
Another round of giggles ensued even as Natalia rolled her eyes, unable to stop her smile. “You’re impossible.” She informed her best friend, wedging the cell phone between her head and shoulder for a moment while she adjusted her coat and scarf. The answering laugh, rich and husky, was enough to turn the younger woman’s knees to jelly. Hurriedly, she spoke, hoping her voice didn’t betray her. “So where are you?”
“Just turned onto Main street.” In the background, Natalia could hear the rumble of the car’s engine and the faint click of a turn signal. “I shouldn’t be more than a few minutes - you’re not too cold, are you? We could eat inside - ”
“It’s not that bad.” The brunette felt her heart melt at the shades of gentle worry in her companion’s voice. “Besides, it’s beautiful out. We can even feed the ducks.”
Olivia chuckled. “You and those ducks. You’re as bad as Emma! I should buy you one of those T-shirts, ya know - I love my duckies? Or maybe a duck-whistle.” Natalia burst into fresh laughter, and Liv’s teasing tone warmed. “What about a duck hat? Like with a fake duck on top. Do they really sell those? Or a - ”
A horrific chaos of sound erupted then, cutting off the hotelier’s clever comment in a sudden din of shattering glass and crunching metal. On the other end of the phone, Natalia froze. “Olivia?” The name was little more than a whispered breath, nearly drowned out by the ringing in her ears. Long, tapered fingers clutched the cell tighter, her grip growing more white-knuckled every second. “Olivia. Olivia, answer me.”
There was no response in the roaring silence. Drinks and donuts clattered unnoticed to the pavement, spilling into a wet, sticky puddle of paper and pastry. Natalia’s breathing grew ragged, shredded into frantic gasps that squeezed from a raw throat. “Olivia! Olivia!”
Back on the street, Natalia pushed herself even faster, shoes smacking against the cement with fierce purpose. Her mind was whirling, a twisted riot of question and emotion. Olivia, Olivia - what had happened to Olivia? It had sounded like a crash - Oh, dear God, if Olivia was hurt - I can’t handle that. I couldn’t live with that. The idea of something worse - her soul shied away, sick. Anything beyond hurt was like a burning coal she couldn’t touch. Her heart clenched, eyes burning with tears she hadn’t the time to shed. She had no idea what she could possibly do if there had been an accident, or even what she would find once she reached Olivia, but the driving need that jolted through every nerve went deeper than any logic. She had to find Liv, had to reach her side. Nothing else mattered.
A prayer wound its way through the fragments of her thoughts, the same plea her soul had been repeating from the instant she had heard that horrible sound. God on High, protect my love and keep her safe . . . care for her and hold her in your arms, until I can hold her in my own. Please, Lord, I can’t - I can’t lose her. I need her too much. She’s everything to me.
Pain gripped her chest as the sudden wail of sirens carried on the crisp air, an ache made more of desperation than exertion spiraling from somewhere deep inside. Shaking panic and icy fear followed, a dizzying mix that flooded beneath her skin and slammed the walls around her heart. They shattered in an instant, laying her soul bare. Natalia swallowed hard, her prayer continuing with a ring of pure truth. No, she’s more than everything. I’ve been so scared, so afraid I’d lose her and Emma both if we didn’t work out - but if I lose her now, without knowing what we could be - I couldn’t stand it. Please, God, don’t ask me to bear that burden, not with her. You gave us this love, don’t take it away before we have a chance to live it. Please, please -
At that moment, she turned the corner onto Main Street, and Natalia’s entire world crashed to a halt. A few dozen yards away sat Olivia’s white car; it was shoved halfway up the sidewalk, tilted precariously on blown tires, a thick aluminum telephone pole embedded in the center of the passenger side. And opposite that - a maroon sedan had smashed into the front driver’s side, its massive front end little more than a mangled, twisted wreck of crumpled metal.
Natalia froze. Farther away, she could see an ambulance with its back doors open, flanked by a squad car and what she vaguely recognized as Mallet’s personal vehicle, all three surrounded by a decent crowd of onlookers and personnel. Lights still flashing, sirens still whooping - but the brunette saw none of it. Her focus had narrowed to that single car, its half-hidden windshield spider-webbed and smeared with a long spatter of what had to be blood. Eyes wide, chest heaving, she felt the scream tearing from her throat before she heard it, a howling wail of utter despair. “Nooooo!!”
She didn’t realize she was running toward the crash until a figure moved into view at her side, strong arms catching and closing around her to hold her back. Natalia fought wildly against their grip, tears streaming unheeded down her face. “Let me go! Let me go! Olivia!”
“Natalia!” It was Mallet’s voice. He was the one holding her, she realized; he must have been saying her name for a while, though she didn’t remember it. Her struggles slowed, hesitating for just a moment, and he shook her gently. “Natalia, it’s okay! She’s okay. Olivia’s okay!”
The words penetrated her grieving haze, and Natalia stared at him, still gasping for breath. Releasing his tight grip, he set his hands on her shoulders, his steady gaze focused on her as if she were a wild animal. “She’s alright, Natalia, they got her out. Olivia’s fine.”
Her terror faded, just a bit, and hope rose like shimmering star in her chest. “She’s - ”
“I told you I’m FINE!” A yell equal parts exasperated and furious erupted before the young cop could answer, cutting through the general noise with the sharpness of a razor. To Natalia’s ears, it was the most beautiful sound in the world. “I gave my statement, I let you idiots maul me around, now give me your phone!”
Mallet turned and gestured toward the ambulance; as though by magic, the crowd parted, revealing a familiar figure seated on the open tailgate. Aside from a torn blouse and a long, bloodied scratch across the right side of her forehead, Olivia looked like the picture of health. Her cheeks flushed and gorgeous green eyes bright, she was presently fixing the man in front of her with one of her patented death glares, ignoring the EMT - Remy, Natalia recognized - carefully swabbing at her cut. It was a sight that hit the Latina like a shot of pure relief. Thank you God, thank you.
The well-dressed man Liv had been arguing with shifted from foot to foot under her hard stare, and Natalia realized it was Jeffery. Apparently, the DA had been close by when the accident happened. Now, he unfolded his crossed arms, making pacifying motions at the blonde woman before him. “Olivia, I don’t think - ”
“I don’t care what you think.” Olivia’s voice came out an almost venomous hiss, laced with a note of something that sounded suspiciously like panic. Full lips thinned, and she turned a bit to face her former husband squarely. “Natalia’s probably going out of her mind - Jeffery, if you don’t hand me that phone right now, I’m going to break your arm!”
Natalia pulled in a sharp breath, the sound half laugh and half sob. “She’s okay.” Her knees went weak, and she gripped Mallet’s jacketed arm with both hands as if it was all that would keep her upright. “Mallet, she - she’s okay.” Chocolate eyes were riveted on the hotelier.
His arm around her shoulders, the cop made sure Natalia was steady on her feet before squeezing her lightly. “Yeah.” He smiled, knowing full well she wasn’t really hearing him anymore. That look on her face - he shook his head. How could any of them missed this for so long? Poor Frank had never stood a chance.
Oblivious to his thoughts, the brunette swallowed hard, feeling the crushing weight on her chest lift slowly. “Liv - ” The weakness in her legs had passed, and now she stepped shakily away from Mallet, her gaze never leaving her best friend. “Olivia!”
Olivia Spencer’s head jerked up, ignoring Remy’s startled fumble as vibrant emerald eyes widened. “Natalia?!” Shocked, she waved the EMT away, pushing to her feet. “Wha - how?”
The younger woman found herself in motion again, dark hair flying behind her. In seconds, she had crossed the space between them, launching herself into Olivia’s open arms and burying her face against the blonde’s neck. “Oh God, Olivia, I was so scared.” Trembling, she wrapped her own arms around Olivia’s waist, clinging without shame. “I thought - I thought - ”
“Shhhh.” Olivia soothed, stroking her friend’s back gently. She knew what Natalia must have thought, she’d been trying to steal Jeffery’s phone for that exact reason. “It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m fine, barely even a scratch.” Okay, so she was also pretty damned sore, and kinda pissed - she’d liked this blouse, damnit! - but Natalia didn’t need to know that. “Come on, you think a little thing like that could put me down? I’m Olivia freakin’ Spencer.”
The joke seemed to fall on deaf ears, the younger woman simply burrowing deeper into the crook of her shoulder. With a tender sigh, Olivia tightened her arms around Natalia, laying her cheek against the tumbled dark silk of the Latina’s hair. Nat obviously needed comforting right now, and Olivia certainly wasn’t going to complain. Battered and bruised as she was, just basking in the warm embrace felt like heaven. After a few seconds, though, something occurred to her. “Natalia, how’d you get here?” She hadn’t seen anyone Natalia could’ve gotten a ride from, even if the brunette had been coherent enough to ask for one, something Olivia doubted. But there was no way - “Did you run here?!?”
Natalia nodded without lifting her head from its hideaway. Even a few minutes before, she might have been embarrassed at the admission, but right this moment, she couldn’t bring herself to feel bad about it. No, standing here in Olivia’s arms, feeling her best friend’s body vibrantly alive against her own, all she could feel was clear. It was as if . . . as if the crash had shaken everything back into place again.
A saying she’d heard Olivia chuckle over echoed softly in her thoughts. Sometimes, when God closes a door - he shuts it on your foot, to make sure you’re paying attention.
Message received, Lord.
Taking a deep breath, she inhaled the blonde’s unique scent greedily, letting it sooth all the places still raw from her heart-stopping fear. Then, almost reverently, she pressed her lips to the smooth skin of Olivia’s neck. “I thought I’d lost you.” She whispered, adding another soft kiss to punctuate her words. “It was the worst thing I’ve ever felt.”
Olivia took a sharp breath, her hand stilling between Natalia’s shoulder blades. That couldn’t have been - had Natalia really just sort-of kissed her? Here, in front of everyone? Granted, Jeffery and Remy had stepped away to give them some privacy, and it wasn’t like anyone could see the younger woman’s face, but it was still a total shock. And so much bolder than she would ever have expected from her assistant . . .
Gently, Natalia shifted a little, moving back just enough to meet Olivia’s eyes with her own. She had to explain things, she realized. She’d have to make Olivia understand. “When I thought you were gone, it killed me.” Her voice came soft, the words said so simply there was no way to argue. “I couldn’t stand losing you, Olivia, not without getting the chance to love you.”
“Natalia - ” Stunned, the blonde woman blinked rapidly, a protest leaping automatically to her tongue. This was public, it was obvious and open and everything Natalia had already admitted having problems with. “You don’t - ”
Natalia stopped her with a finger to her lips, chocolate eyes open and shining. “I know the risks, and I know the consequences, remember?” She smiled then, and it was utterly breathtaking. “No more limbo, no more analyzing and over-thinking. I love you, Olivia Spencer. I don’t care who knows it.”
The hand at the older woman’s mouth moved down, cupping her chin, and Olivia had only a dizzying moment to realize this was really happening before Natalia’s warm lips met hers. Oh God. Heat ignited low in her belly, spreading through her veins in a breath-stealing, stomach-flipping, nerve-sparking rush. And beneath that? A sensation of pure, utter bliss, settling deep in her bones and anchored with Natalia’s strong embrace. Olivia reeled, unable to do anything but pull her lover closer and return the caress. It wasn’t anything like their first kiss, or any other kiss in her life. Here, now, everything had finally clicked. This - this is home. This is where I belong.
When they finally broke apart, it took a moment for Olivia to remember to open her eyes. Breathless, she looked up and found Natalia smiling with a curious mix of shyness and pride. “So.” The Latin woman ducked her head slightly. “Are we okay?”
“Oh yeah.” The low, raspy answer came out instantly, and Olivia had to fight a blush when Natalia’s eyes widened. Clearing her throat, the blonde reached for Nat’s hand, tangling their fingers together. “Yes.” She repeated, smiling. “Yes, we’re okay.”
“Good.” Natalia squeezed her hand, tilting her head toward the waiting men. “Are they - ” Her cheeks darkened faintly. “Was it too much? Are they staring?”
They? Honestly, Olivia had forgotten anyone else existed the moment their lips touched. Now, her gaze flicked up over the brunette’s shoulder, a death glare challenging anyone who might dare to look back. But there was no criticism or scorn in the faces she could see. On the contrary, Mallet met her eyes squarely, his wry, gentle smile utterly genuine. He seemed totally happy for them. Remy looked like someone had struck him in the back of the head with a board . . . completely shocked, but not disgusted in the least, if she were judging by the small grin edging its way across his face. And Jeffery’s smirk held nothing but teasing laughter. “If I whistle, you’re gonna hit me, aren’t you?”
Olivia raised an eyebrow at him, and the DA just laughed, raising his hands in surrender. “Okay, fine, I give.” His smile turned serious for just a moment. “I’m glad you’re okay.” As Natalia turned, still holding Liv’s hand, he nodded towards her. “Both of you.”
“Thanks, Jeffery.” And she meant it, Olivia realized, watching him tow Remy back around the ambulance. The tall black man managed to raise one hand, waving as he was dragged away. “Put ice on that bump Olivia, and take it easy for a few days. Congratulations, you guys!”
Congratulations - huh. The blonde looked over at her smashed car, noticing only a few glares or sniffs of disapproval from the onlookers that had caught the show. Most actually seemed rather touched by the happy ending. Even the most angry-looking watcher, though, moved off as Mallet started clearing the scene. As the crowd around them started to disperse, Olivia turned her gaze to the woman snuggled against her side. Who, she noticed, looked absolutely content. Still - “Are you sure about this?”
“Yes.” Natalia’s answer came quick and firm, without any doubt. Tugging Olivia’s arm around her waist, the brunette leaned her head against her lover’s shoulder for a moment before gathering up Olivia’s salvaged things from the back of the ambulance. “Come on. You can change your shirt and clean up at the Beacon, and we can borrow the extra car to head home. Unless you want to stay there?”
The hotelier shook her head. Now that her adrenaline and emotional high was fading, her body ached, and the scratch across her forehead had started stinging unmercifully. But as a warm smile crossed her face, Olivia knew she’d never felt better in her life. “Let’s just go home, huh?” Shrugging into her jacket to cover the torn shirt, she slung a casual arm around Natalia’s waist, and the two of them started their trek back toward the Beacon. Back home - together. The way it should be.
Natalia smiled. Home - she liked the sound of that.
“Hey, duck-lady. What happened to our donuts?”