The Extra Long, Extra Unimpressed Order of the Phoenix Movie Review

[runeharmonic]

I wrote this review immediately after watching the OotP movie at the local IMAX last night. I posted it at Harmony Forever, but I thought, since this review was so long, I should probably also post it on LJ for posterity.

Don't mind me. Feel free to skip this, what with all the OotP reviews coming out. :)

Comments

[alexi_lupin]

So you really think it's going to be Harry/Hermione in the end? I wish it was, but I'm not holding out much hope. Once upon a time I was a R/Hr shipper - and then I realised how boring it was.

Why are you calling Ginny Jenny?

I agree with a lot of our points, especially about the lack of emotion impact the movie had because it was so rushed.

And Cho was oh-so-slightly redeemed when Snape implied that she's only dobbed them in because Umbridge used Veritaserum on her.

[runeharmonic]

Yes, I really do think it'll be H/Hr in the end. :)

As for the Jenny thing, to make a potentially long story short, in an article/interview with Dan (I think that's it), the journalist misspelled her name and wrote "Jenny" instead of "Ginny." That error summarizes exactly what the character's role is in the books and in the movies: totally forgettable and insignificant. :P

On the subject of Cho, although she was slightly redeemed, we don't actually get to see her onscreen after Snape's revelation, so there was no visual resolution. That's why Cho got screwed over big time, IMO.

Thanks for stopping by! :)

[alexi_lupin]

I do hope so.

LOL. I like Ginny, to be honest. I don't think she's insignificant, but she pales in comparison to Hermione.

I suppose they were just pressed for time, but still. I don't feel any particular liking for her, so I don't mind Cho-hate, but it is a trifle unfair.

=D

[madderbrad]

Wow, tell us what you really think! :-)

Seriously, it's a good review. Just a trifle snarky :-) but a lot of your points are spot on, and some were things I hadn't noted before. Thanks for posting it to LJ.

(And it's good to read some pure snarkiness runeharmonic again. I'm just glad I'm on your side!)

It was storytelling by numbersOh, sure, but all of the movies have suffered somewhat on that score, don't you think? I've never thought the movies have stood well as independent films ... too much to pack in, and the books don't lend themselves well to really interesting movie plots either. I've always thought of the movies as "Selected Highlights from the Harry Potter Books!" sort of things

[madderbrad]

Love your section #5. Hoping so much that DH shows that H/Hr wins out, although I fear it'll just prove that JKR is a bad author (again). See you back here in, what, about ten days?

Great review, thanks for posting over here. Cheers.

[runeharmonic]

Wow, Brad! You're a consistently great LJer. I appreciate the long and thoughtful comments. :D

I've always thought of the movies as "Selected Highlights from the Harry Potter Books!" sort of things.

I agree with you that the books can't realistically be packed into movies, but my beef with OotP is its lack of emotional impact because the filmmakers made everything way too short. There was no time to appreciate anything. If Yates had trimmed the storyline down to the critical points and allowed those moments to sink in with the audience, that would have been fine. Instead, what we got was a barrage of scenes that just wouldn't stop.

I'm glad to read that Sirius's death left you cold, also. I found it fairly artificial, too fancy/jazzed up to really affect me. First up, the whole shame of Sirius's death was that (a) it was largely his fault through 'playing' with Bella, and (b) it was a tragedy because it was a mere stunner which saw his downfall.Here I actually think the movie tried to improve upon the WTF-inducing way that Rowling

[chasezgranger]

... the movie they have him hit by an AK ... and I didn't find the special effects of his falling into the mirror particularly authentic or convincing. I guess in the movie world they strive to make things much simpler, and so wanted Sirius to be completely good-guy, no bad points.

I think JKR probably told them kill him off so I can get these rabid Sirius fans off my back once and for all...lol.

[chasezgranger]

Harry looked like such an incompetent idiot that the audience surely cannot help but ask, "How is this kid/loser/dork going to defeat that fully grown, legendary dark wizard?"

That's what I'm talking about! I'm looking at this DD/V fight thinking "Okay how in the heck is Harry supposed to beat V NOW?"

During Jenny's Prophecy scene I called her a lil bitch out loud. I can't stand her.

I pretty much agreed with everything that you said, though I do think that Emma's acting has improved because for once she's not overacting! Check out my review on my LJ. :p

[runeharmonic]

That's what I'm talking about! I'm looking at this DD/V fight thinking "Okay how in the heck is Harry supposed to beat V NOW?"

Amazing, isn't it? That's one of the major reasons why HBP dumbfounded a large number of readers. Harry's supposed to lead a war against Voldemort, whom he'll end up dueling one-on-one in the end. Instead of preparing himself, Harry turns into the arrogant jock-king of Snogwarts High.

HBP was such utter crap in this sense.

During Jenny's Prophecy scene I called her a lil bitch out loud. I can't stand her.

LOL!

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who was just as surprised and irritated. I honestly didn't intend to shout in the theater, either. I just blurted it out because my bullshit detector couldn't handle the Sue-ness anymore.

I pretty much agreed with everything that you said, though I do think that Emma's acting has improved because for once she's not overacting! Check out my review on my LJ. :pI used to think Emma was the best actress of the three, but that really wasn't saying much, all things

[trevorw2005]

Wow. This review was probably one of the most enjoyable and deadly accurate reviews I've read thus far. I'm glad you mentioned Hermione calling Ron, "Ronald." That irked me to no end while I was watching the movie but apparently I did my best to forget it afterwards.

I agree though, that the pacing and storytelling by numbers (LOL!) was by far the worst part of the movie and it did magnify every single other offense. The only way to really take anything away from the movie is by filling in the blanks based on the books. And in that case, any respect gained once those gaps are filled is immediately murdered by the many issues you covered perfectly. The casual fan and moviegoer will probably be the ones that enjoy this movie the most...because they know enough to piece it together and are willing let the special effects substitute for everything else.

[runeharmonic]

Wow. This review was probably one of the most enjoyable and deadly accurate reviews I've read thus far.

Thanks! :)

I wrote this right after seeing the movie, so the review captures my strongest initial impressions. I'm glad you were entertained.

I haven't read anyone else's review yet, though, so I should probably do that soon...

I'm glad you mentioned Hermione calling Ron, "Ronald." That irked me to no end while I was watching the movie but apparently I did my best to forget it afterwards.

Sorry for reminding you. :P

But yeah, calling Ron "Ronald" was one of the many things that distinguished Luna's relationship with Ron. In addition to that, Luna actually appreciates Ron's humor and puts Ron before Harry, in sharp contrast to Hermione. I adore R/L, so it pisses me off that the filmmakers gave that aspect of their unusual relationship to Hermione, and cut the R/L interaction altogether. :(

I agree though, that the pacing and storytelling by numbers (LOL!) was by far the worst part of the movie and it did magnify every single

[gracie_in_greek]

*Waave*