(no subject)
I can't decide if I'm the one letting people down, or if other people are letting me down. I feel like i am trapped in this wave of boredum with nothing to do and no one to hang out with. I know it is partially my fault, but it's rather hard when the people i like the most make themselves mia or just busy all the time. Why am I the one always stuck with nothing to do? I try and call people, but everyone else seems to have these busy lives...what happened to my busy life? These are supposed to be some of the most memorable, fun, and exciting times, on the brink of something new and different, another life, but yet i feel as though i'm being left behind away from the excitement. I can't wait for summer, but I can't help feeling as though I am going to be let down by it. What if all the free time I have i have nothing to do with? What if I'm just waiting around all summer to go to work and come home? I hope it's not like that. I just want to be in college, back in school, I know I am a nerd for saying that but it gives me something to do, allows me to be around people, especially college, with all the new (cool, I hope) people that i can meet. I just need to meet some new people, make a semi new life. (it cant be a whole new life because frankly there are some people i couldnt leave behind, and i'm staying in greensboro...so its not like i have far to go to see people i already know.) but it will be new enough. I'm just ready for it that's all, I wish it would come sooner.