Mocha #19, Cinnamon Swirl #12, Peppermint #30, Chopped Nuts
Author: Fynn
Challenge: Mocha #19 - you'll have to do better than that, Cinnamon Swirl #12 - a taste of his own medicine, Peppermint #30 - cane
Topping: Chopped Nuts
Story: Black Roses
Rating: PG
Wordcount: 345
Summary: Kay has fun with nicknames. Malben is unamused.
Notes: I don't own House MD, I'm just referencing it.
The AU-ness is in Malben's situation.
“Hey, House!”
Malben turned his head. “What?”
“You! House!”
“What?”
Kay sighed. “C’mon, I refuse to believe you got no idea what I’m talkin’ about.”
“Baedecker, I’m not in the mood for jokes.”
“It ain’t a joke. I’m givin’ you a new nickname.” She grinned widely. “After all, can’t call you Hawkeye any more, can I?”
“And why ‘House’?”
“House MD? Y’know?”
“No, I don’t. Explain. Or preferably don’t, I’m actually in something of a hurry.”
“Doesn’t look like it.”
“I’d like to see you make better time with this thing.” He gestured irritably at his cane.
“Excuses excuses. You’re a doctor - you oughta know how to use it.”
“Being a doctor qualifies me to treat injuries, not live with them.”
“You’re always tellin’ us how to live with ‘em.”
He groaned. “That’s different.”
“Yeah, sure it is. Why?”
“Because none of you have had anything this serious to deal with.”
“Slasher and Pirate did.”
“They were vampires. Human and vampires have slightly different healing speeds.”
She laughed. “Y’know what I think? I think you’re just pissed off ‘cause you’re the patient for once.”
“No, I’m annoyed because you won’t let me past. Now get out of my way.”
“Nope.”
“I do not have time for this.”
“Okay. I’ll let you go when I finish explainin’.” She leant against the wall, running a hand through her close-cropped hair. “House MD. American TV show about - and you’re gonna love this - a crippled doctor. Walks with a cane and everything.”
“And why should I be interested in this?”
“’cause it’s you. Doctor, walks with a cane, grumpy bastard...”
“Very nice. If you’ll excuse me-”
He began to limp past her, but she put a hand on his shoulder, stopping him in his tracks. “Your new nickname. House.”
“....Right. Baedecker, how much have you drunk this morning?”
“Not a drop, swear to God.”
“I’m not sure I believe that.”
“Just high on life.”
“Yes, well, when you’ve finished getting your kick from annoying me, could I get past, please?”
“Sure thing-“
He started walking.
“- Doctor House”