(no subject)
Collateral Damage
= An Odd Number of Stars
+ Grape #14 [Collateral Damage]
+ Rainbow Sprinkles [Lotti]
+ Cherry [time jumps]
+ Gummy Bunny [Origfic Bingo: distress (and rescue)]
+ Malt [ bassair trick or treat: 17: happiness is a loaded gun]
Maya duly whispered her secret in his ear. “Why aren’t Leah and I crying?” She wanted to know. “We tried, but it doesn’t work.” Leah nodded adamantly on his other side.
Richard found more family in his sister-in-law than his whole family put together
Character: Richard Timeline: Feb 2007 Words: 2387
My anonymous icebreaker, now with correct spacing!
Richard didn’t receive a letter. On Thursday afternoon he received a call from Harry. He was desperately trying to find the origins of a child’s constant nosebleeds among the tomes of texts stacked in his room when his phone rang. “Yes?” He demanded, frantically trying to stop the precarious pile of paper on his desk from slipping.
“Richard, its Harry.” Harry’s solemn voice was unfamiliar; he had never heard his brother speak in grave dejection, using Richard’s full name instead of some whimsical nickname.
“Harry.” Richard straightened up carefully and awaited the news that Harry’s phone call heralded.
“Have you heard from Ma yet?” Richard bit his lip and rubbed his stubble thoughtfully. His mother rarely tried to contact him for social reasons; he was sure the news was bad now.
“No. Why? What’s wrong?” Richard enquired, careful to keep his voice even, masking his concern as he sat down at the edge of his messy couch.
“It’s about Phillip.” The breath hitched in Richard’s throat. Their youngest brother was fighting in Afghanistan. Dread filled Richard’s stomach and he knew what the next three words were without Harry needing to add them. “He is dead.” Richard gulped, keeping the bile down. The idea of his little brother, suddenly gone, one of the white sheets in the morgue, terrified him.
“How?” He whispered, sliding off his perch on the sofa to curl up on the dirty carpet.
“A car bomb.” He wasn’t even a white sheet in the morgue; he was an arm, a leg, lying out there in the hot dessert. He wasn’t even given the dignity of a flag draped mahogany coffin, buried with his wife and his two daughters crying at the side of his marble gravestone.
“Does Lotti know?” Richard didn’t want to be the one to tell his brother’s young wife. He didn’t want to be there when she stood in the kitchen, an infant on each hip, her face falling in devastation at the news that the father of her children would never see them grow up.
“She got a separate letter. I haven’t heard from her, so I assume so.” Bitterness for his brother replaced fear. Harry was too much of a coward to confront Lotti, to make sure she was alright. Harry didn’t want to know if she was sobbing; he was perfectly happy with his own grief. This is why Phillip hadn’t given Lotti to Harry.
“I’ll go and check on her.” Richard decided. He got up slowly and snapped his phone shut, not wanting to hear his brother’s reply. He took a sharp breath, childhood maladies forgotten and took his coat off the peg.
* * *
Richard’s first and only girlfriend had been one of seven siblings, and she’d told him that there was a link between siblings that just surpassed the traditional familial ties; siblings understood each other on the most basic level, she explained. One of three brothers, Richard never felt he could verify that claim.
It’s the fact that you’ve suffered together. She smiled. She didn’t have a very attractive smile. You’ve spent your first eighteen years of your life together; all in the same boat. It forges a bond that nothing can break.
She was studying primary education and all she wanted in life was to be a primary school teacher. She thought that because Richard wanted to be a paediatrician and she wanted to work with children too, they had a lot in common. They didn’t.
Richard never felt like he had suffered alongside his brothers; he’d suffered because of his brothers. Harry, his older brother, charmed their mother and numerous women alike. He was an overachiever in every sense of the world, graduating with a 3.8 GPA and on track to attend law school as well as one of the most celebrated baseball players in the school and with a track record of social, sporting and academic excellence. Richard had always paled in comparison; a closeted gay in a right wing family, Richard was always made to feel superfluous to his brother. He was pasty and small and studied all the time, yet achieving a feeble 3.6 GPA at graduation.
Phillip, the youngest of the trio, had followed his oldest brother, though he showed none of his brother’s academic excellence, making him an excellent candidate for the army, where he met Lotti, the young Air Force cadet. They married and had two daughters within a year of meeting.
Eighteen months ago, after relative silence from his family, Richard had received a visit from Phillip. The youngest of the Brown boys, Phillip was fair, with blond hair expertly cut to a stubble on his head.
“I’ve been called to Afghanistan.” He told Richard in lieu of a greeting as Richard opened the door of his flat. “I’m leaving in two weeks.”
“Oh.” Richard didn’t know what to reply to that, as his stoic brother entered his apartment without invitation.
“I was wondering whether you can look after Lotti and the girls for me. I want to know they’re in good hands.” Phillip was standing in the middle of the room, surrounded by piles of books and papers that Richard was too lazy to file. He looked almost comical in this environment, his military stature and stillness scorned by the relative mess of the room.
“Me?” Richard looked at him in complete surprise.
“Yes, you.” Phillip was impatient now and started pacing the room. “Harry isn’t trustworthy. I know he loves me and he loves Ma, but I don’t know whether I can trust him with Lotti and the girls. He so flirtatious and wild, he may leave within twenty four hours for Japan and they wouldn’t hear from him for months. You… you, on the other hand, are trustworthy. I mean, you don’t even have a girlfriend!”
Richard nodded, careful to keep his emotions in check. He perched himself at the edge of the sofa. “But Lotti knows Harry…”
“I want to invite you for dinner, so you and Lotti can get to know each other better.” Phillip interrupted. He fixed Richard with a glare. “Tomorrow.”
“I have a night shift at the hospital tomorrow night.” Richard was aware that his brother really didn’t mean for the time to be debateable, but his career as a doctor was more important than even his sister-in-law.
“The day after tomorrow?” This time the time was phrased as a question.
“It’s a 36 hour shift.” Richard explained with a sad shake of his head.
“Tonight?” Phillip seemed desperate. This, it seemed, meant a lot to him.
“Okay.” Richard agreed, making a mental note to cancel plans with his boyfriend. He realised that this was one of the first times in his life when his family took priority over anything else. “I’ll come. I still don’t understand why you don’t give Dave or Harry this responsibility.” Phillip didn’t like his decisions questioned, so he just glared at his brother.
“I chose you. If you don’t want to…”
“That’s not what I meant.” Richard didn’t even let his brother finish. This was the first time his family showed any signs of wanting anything to do with him and he wasn’t going to second guess that.
* * *
“You can be the girls’ Uncle Charlie.” Phillip had smiled at Richard, a stiff expression that didn’t match his stern features, after they’d eaten together. Lotti seemed to be exhausted (with twin girls, who wasn’t?), but the glimmers of her true personality that weren’t dulled by sleepless nights intrigued Richard and he couldn’t believe how Lotti and Phillip made a functioning couple. But they did, and who was he to second guess that.
“Uncle Charlie?” Lotti’s brow furrowed in confusion. Richard was surprised she hadn’t heard about their surrogate father yet.
“He wasn’t actually our uncle.” Richard explained. “He was our father’s best friend, who was tasked with taking care of our family if our father died. When he did, Uncle Charlie moved in, becoming our breadwinner. He taught Harry how to play ball, helped me with my premature science experiments and played soldiers with Phillip.”
“He never married.” Phillip continued. “He always told us he already had a family. He was an honourable man though, and never tried anything on Ma-”
“-despite the fact that he was in love with her.” Phillip glared at Richard, as if the older man had accidentally let slip a family secret. “What?” Richard demanded, shrugging. “It’s true.”
* * *
Lotti didn’t answer the door. It was freezing: Richard’s old anorak had no chance against the strong February sleet, which rendered Richard shivering as he arrived at the small two room flat that his brother had left his widow.
Phillip’s widow. The word sounded so harsh. It demoted the young athletic mother to a lower social class, one that implied negligence and alcoholism. Richard frowned and knocked on the door gently.
* * *
“How’s your boyfriend?” Lotti didn’t need anyone to come out to her. She hadn’t expected it of her sister, and she didn’t expect it of her brother-in-law. She watched the flickers of fear, anger, denial and resignation flash across Richard’s face. He didn’t know what to do. She was in the military for pete’s sake: she shouldn’t be this lenient about it. “You know, I have a twin sister.” Lotti continued with a sly smile. “Her name’s Grace.”
Richard didn’t understand Lotti at all. “I know” he said. He knew this about her twin, and about her sister. He’d spent every Tuesday afternoon at her house for the last eighteen months, playing with the twins, talking to her, bringing her groceries, checking Leah’s tonsils or Maya’s bruise ankle. He had heard her rant about her twin and her sister, about her mother and her father. He didn’t know why she was telling him this.
“One thing I forgot to tell you about Grace, though.” Lotti had that sly smile on her face. “She’s gay too.”
“She’s a lesbian.” Richard corrected when he could breathe again. This woman accepted him. This part of his family accepted him.
“Gay, lesbian, queer…” Lotti waved a hand around her head. “Same thing. So I would like to have you know that just because I was in the military with Phillip doesn’t mean I share some of the radical right wing values of which you seem to be afraid.”
“With good reason.” Richard added. He didn’t like the implication that he was a coward. Lotti inclined her head, recognising this as a fact.
“With good reason.” She agreed. “Anyway, answer my question.”
“He’s good.” Richard said, still having difficulty understanding this liberal republican who was smiling at him with her Brazilian features, offering the family his own blood never offered him.
“What’s he called again?” She asked, seemingly trying to chase the thought with her eyes as they flashed from one end of the room to another.
“Gordon.” Lotti waited. “Gordon Russell.” He added quickly. “He’s a surgeon in the hospital.”
“How long have you two been going out?” She caught his eye again and he realised he’d been staring straight ahead, avoiding her molten brown eyes.
“Eight months.” Richard smiled proudly as she grinned at him.
“Long enough to introduce him to your family then.” The thought made Richard’s throat constrict but Lotti continued, ignoring his panicked expression. “Are you free for dinner on Friday night? I might be persuaded to keep the girls up.” Richard grinned at her, his happiness nearly overflowing.
* * *
Lotti didn’t answer, so Richard let himself in with the key Phillip had gifted him with. She was family and he had to take care of her. The apartment was quiet. Lotti was sleeping, with one daughter on either side of her, her eyes red and puffy. She looked a mess. Both girls were awake and smiled at their uncle in excitement. Richard signalled silence, but encouraged them to come to them. They crept over their mother to embrace their uncle in the next room where they spoke in whispers.
“Uncle Richard.” Maya carefully intoned each word. “Mommy’s very sad.” Leah just pulled at her uncle’s trouser leg. Richard took off his coat and sat down on the floor, where Leah promptly made herself comfortable on his lap, linking her arms around his neck and whispering in his ear.
“I’m scared.” The words, spoken with Leah’s light lisp made the heavy feeling of sadness rise in Richard’s chest again. It translated to tears as Leah looked him in the eyes; Phillips clear blue eyes demanded an explanation.
“Don’t be scared. Mommy’s going to take care of you.” Richard promised. Maya bit her lip and stared at her uncle before she sat down on his other knee.
“Mommy was crying.” Maya explained. “She wouldn’t stop.” Richard caught sight of the letter. It was lying, almost underneath the sofa. One side was crumpled, as if Lotti’s hand had clenched to a fist when she read those condemning words.
“Did she tell you why?” Richard whispered, leaving the letter where it was and directing his attention back to his two beautiful nieces.
“She said we’d never see Daddy again.” Maya explained. She looked down at the floor and then back at Richard. He was surprised to see guilt in her childish features. He leaned forward. Maya duly whispered her secret in his ear. “Why aren’t Leah and I crying?” She wanted to know. “We tried, but it doesn’t work.” Leah nodded adamantly on his other side.
“I don’t know, darlings.” Richard finds himself repeating the words a lot over the next week: when Lotti sobs on his shoulder, when his mother demands answers, when Leah and Maya try and understand the situation. He stands there and doesn’t understand. But he knows what he tells Lotti is true for both of them. She calls her sisters and her family, and he calls on her and the girls.
“At least we have family.” He promises her as he honours his brother’s memory. And for the first time in his life, he understands the word to its full extent.
= An Odd Number of Stars
+ Grape #14 [Collateral Damage]
+ Rainbow Sprinkles [Lotti]
+ Cherry [time jumps]
+ Gummy Bunny [Origfic Bingo: distress (and rescue)]
+ Malt [ bassair trick or treat: 17: happiness is a loaded gun]
Maya duly whispered her secret in his ear. “Why aren’t Leah and I crying?” She wanted to know. “We tried, but it doesn’t work.” Leah nodded adamantly on his other side.
Richard found more family in his sister-in-law than his whole family put together
Character: Richard Timeline: Feb 2007 Words: 2387
My anonymous icebreaker, now with correct spacing!
Richard didn’t receive a letter. On Thursday afternoon he received a call from Harry. He was desperately trying to find the origins of a child’s constant nosebleeds among the tomes of texts stacked in his room when his phone rang. “Yes?” He demanded, frantically trying to stop the precarious pile of paper on his desk from slipping.
“Richard, its Harry.” Harry’s solemn voice was unfamiliar; he had never heard his brother speak in grave dejection, using Richard’s full name instead of some whimsical nickname.
“Harry.” Richard straightened up carefully and awaited the news that Harry’s phone call heralded.
“Have you heard from Ma yet?” Richard bit his lip and rubbed his stubble thoughtfully. His mother rarely tried to contact him for social reasons; he was sure the news was bad now.
“No. Why? What’s wrong?” Richard enquired, careful to keep his voice even, masking his concern as he sat down at the edge of his messy couch.
“It’s about Phillip.” The breath hitched in Richard’s throat. Their youngest brother was fighting in Afghanistan. Dread filled Richard’s stomach and he knew what the next three words were without Harry needing to add them. “He is dead.” Richard gulped, keeping the bile down. The idea of his little brother, suddenly gone, one of the white sheets in the morgue, terrified him.
“How?” He whispered, sliding off his perch on the sofa to curl up on the dirty carpet.
“A car bomb.” He wasn’t even a white sheet in the morgue; he was an arm, a leg, lying out there in the hot dessert. He wasn’t even given the dignity of a flag draped mahogany coffin, buried with his wife and his two daughters crying at the side of his marble gravestone.
“Does Lotti know?” Richard didn’t want to be the one to tell his brother’s young wife. He didn’t want to be there when she stood in the kitchen, an infant on each hip, her face falling in devastation at the news that the father of her children would never see them grow up.
“She got a separate letter. I haven’t heard from her, so I assume so.” Bitterness for his brother replaced fear. Harry was too much of a coward to confront Lotti, to make sure she was alright. Harry didn’t want to know if she was sobbing; he was perfectly happy with his own grief. This is why Phillip hadn’t given Lotti to Harry.
“I’ll go and check on her.” Richard decided. He got up slowly and snapped his phone shut, not wanting to hear his brother’s reply. He took a sharp breath, childhood maladies forgotten and took his coat off the peg.
* * *
Richard’s first and only girlfriend had been one of seven siblings, and she’d told him that there was a link between siblings that just surpassed the traditional familial ties; siblings understood each other on the most basic level, she explained. One of three brothers, Richard never felt he could verify that claim.
It’s the fact that you’ve suffered together. She smiled. She didn’t have a very attractive smile. You’ve spent your first eighteen years of your life together; all in the same boat. It forges a bond that nothing can break.
She was studying primary education and all she wanted in life was to be a primary school teacher. She thought that because Richard wanted to be a paediatrician and she wanted to work with children too, they had a lot in common. They didn’t.
Richard never felt like he had suffered alongside his brothers; he’d suffered because of his brothers. Harry, his older brother, charmed their mother and numerous women alike. He was an overachiever in every sense of the world, graduating with a 3.8 GPA and on track to attend law school as well as one of the most celebrated baseball players in the school and with a track record of social, sporting and academic excellence. Richard had always paled in comparison; a closeted gay in a right wing family, Richard was always made to feel superfluous to his brother. He was pasty and small and studied all the time, yet achieving a feeble 3.6 GPA at graduation.
Phillip, the youngest of the trio, had followed his oldest brother, though he showed none of his brother’s academic excellence, making him an excellent candidate for the army, where he met Lotti, the young Air Force cadet. They married and had two daughters within a year of meeting.
Eighteen months ago, after relative silence from his family, Richard had received a visit from Phillip. The youngest of the Brown boys, Phillip was fair, with blond hair expertly cut to a stubble on his head.
“I’ve been called to Afghanistan.” He told Richard in lieu of a greeting as Richard opened the door of his flat. “I’m leaving in two weeks.”
“Oh.” Richard didn’t know what to reply to that, as his stoic brother entered his apartment without invitation.
“I was wondering whether you can look after Lotti and the girls for me. I want to know they’re in good hands.” Phillip was standing in the middle of the room, surrounded by piles of books and papers that Richard was too lazy to file. He looked almost comical in this environment, his military stature and stillness scorned by the relative mess of the room.
“Me?” Richard looked at him in complete surprise.
“Yes, you.” Phillip was impatient now and started pacing the room. “Harry isn’t trustworthy. I know he loves me and he loves Ma, but I don’t know whether I can trust him with Lotti and the girls. He so flirtatious and wild, he may leave within twenty four hours for Japan and they wouldn’t hear from him for months. You… you, on the other hand, are trustworthy. I mean, you don’t even have a girlfriend!”
Richard nodded, careful to keep his emotions in check. He perched himself at the edge of the sofa. “But Lotti knows Harry…”
“I want to invite you for dinner, so you and Lotti can get to know each other better.” Phillip interrupted. He fixed Richard with a glare. “Tomorrow.”
“I have a night shift at the hospital tomorrow night.” Richard was aware that his brother really didn’t mean for the time to be debateable, but his career as a doctor was more important than even his sister-in-law.
“The day after tomorrow?” This time the time was phrased as a question.
“It’s a 36 hour shift.” Richard explained with a sad shake of his head.
“Tonight?” Phillip seemed desperate. This, it seemed, meant a lot to him.
“Okay.” Richard agreed, making a mental note to cancel plans with his boyfriend. He realised that this was one of the first times in his life when his family took priority over anything else. “I’ll come. I still don’t understand why you don’t give Dave or Harry this responsibility.” Phillip didn’t like his decisions questioned, so he just glared at his brother.
“I chose you. If you don’t want to…”
“That’s not what I meant.” Richard didn’t even let his brother finish. This was the first time his family showed any signs of wanting anything to do with him and he wasn’t going to second guess that.
* * *
“You can be the girls’ Uncle Charlie.” Phillip had smiled at Richard, a stiff expression that didn’t match his stern features, after they’d eaten together. Lotti seemed to be exhausted (with twin girls, who wasn’t?), but the glimmers of her true personality that weren’t dulled by sleepless nights intrigued Richard and he couldn’t believe how Lotti and Phillip made a functioning couple. But they did, and who was he to second guess that.
“Uncle Charlie?” Lotti’s brow furrowed in confusion. Richard was surprised she hadn’t heard about their surrogate father yet.
“He wasn’t actually our uncle.” Richard explained. “He was our father’s best friend, who was tasked with taking care of our family if our father died. When he did, Uncle Charlie moved in, becoming our breadwinner. He taught Harry how to play ball, helped me with my premature science experiments and played soldiers with Phillip.”
“He never married.” Phillip continued. “He always told us he already had a family. He was an honourable man though, and never tried anything on Ma-”
“-despite the fact that he was in love with her.” Phillip glared at Richard, as if the older man had accidentally let slip a family secret. “What?” Richard demanded, shrugging. “It’s true.”
* * *
Lotti didn’t answer the door. It was freezing: Richard’s old anorak had no chance against the strong February sleet, which rendered Richard shivering as he arrived at the small two room flat that his brother had left his widow.
Phillip’s widow. The word sounded so harsh. It demoted the young athletic mother to a lower social class, one that implied negligence and alcoholism. Richard frowned and knocked on the door gently.
* * *
“How’s your boyfriend?” Lotti didn’t need anyone to come out to her. She hadn’t expected it of her sister, and she didn’t expect it of her brother-in-law. She watched the flickers of fear, anger, denial and resignation flash across Richard’s face. He didn’t know what to do. She was in the military for pete’s sake: she shouldn’t be this lenient about it. “You know, I have a twin sister.” Lotti continued with a sly smile. “Her name’s Grace.”
Richard didn’t understand Lotti at all. “I know” he said. He knew this about her twin, and about her sister. He’d spent every Tuesday afternoon at her house for the last eighteen months, playing with the twins, talking to her, bringing her groceries, checking Leah’s tonsils or Maya’s bruise ankle. He had heard her rant about her twin and her sister, about her mother and her father. He didn’t know why she was telling him this.
“One thing I forgot to tell you about Grace, though.” Lotti had that sly smile on her face. “She’s gay too.”
“She’s a lesbian.” Richard corrected when he could breathe again. This woman accepted him. This part of his family accepted him.
“Gay, lesbian, queer…” Lotti waved a hand around her head. “Same thing. So I would like to have you know that just because I was in the military with Phillip doesn’t mean I share some of the radical right wing values of which you seem to be afraid.”
“With good reason.” Richard added. He didn’t like the implication that he was a coward. Lotti inclined her head, recognising this as a fact.
“With good reason.” She agreed. “Anyway, answer my question.”
“He’s good.” Richard said, still having difficulty understanding this liberal republican who was smiling at him with her Brazilian features, offering the family his own blood never offered him.
“What’s he called again?” She asked, seemingly trying to chase the thought with her eyes as they flashed from one end of the room to another.
“Gordon.” Lotti waited. “Gordon Russell.” He added quickly. “He’s a surgeon in the hospital.”
“How long have you two been going out?” She caught his eye again and he realised he’d been staring straight ahead, avoiding her molten brown eyes.
“Eight months.” Richard smiled proudly as she grinned at him.
“Long enough to introduce him to your family then.” The thought made Richard’s throat constrict but Lotti continued, ignoring his panicked expression. “Are you free for dinner on Friday night? I might be persuaded to keep the girls up.” Richard grinned at her, his happiness nearly overflowing.
* * *
Lotti didn’t answer, so Richard let himself in with the key Phillip had gifted him with. She was family and he had to take care of her. The apartment was quiet. Lotti was sleeping, with one daughter on either side of her, her eyes red and puffy. She looked a mess. Both girls were awake and smiled at their uncle in excitement. Richard signalled silence, but encouraged them to come to them. They crept over their mother to embrace their uncle in the next room where they spoke in whispers.
“Uncle Richard.” Maya carefully intoned each word. “Mommy’s very sad.” Leah just pulled at her uncle’s trouser leg. Richard took off his coat and sat down on the floor, where Leah promptly made herself comfortable on his lap, linking her arms around his neck and whispering in his ear.
“I’m scared.” The words, spoken with Leah’s light lisp made the heavy feeling of sadness rise in Richard’s chest again. It translated to tears as Leah looked him in the eyes; Phillips clear blue eyes demanded an explanation.
“Don’t be scared. Mommy’s going to take care of you.” Richard promised. Maya bit her lip and stared at her uncle before she sat down on his other knee.
“Mommy was crying.” Maya explained. “She wouldn’t stop.” Richard caught sight of the letter. It was lying, almost underneath the sofa. One side was crumpled, as if Lotti’s hand had clenched to a fist when she read those condemning words.
“Did she tell you why?” Richard whispered, leaving the letter where it was and directing his attention back to his two beautiful nieces.
“She said we’d never see Daddy again.” Maya explained. She looked down at the floor and then back at Richard. He was surprised to see guilt in her childish features. He leaned forward. Maya duly whispered her secret in his ear. “Why aren’t Leah and I crying?” She wanted to know. “We tried, but it doesn’t work.” Leah nodded adamantly on his other side.
“I don’t know, darlings.” Richard finds himself repeating the words a lot over the next week: when Lotti sobs on his shoulder, when his mother demands answers, when Leah and Maya try and understand the situation. He stands there and doesn’t understand. But he knows what he tells Lotti is true for both of them. She calls her sisters and her family, and he calls on her and the girls.
“At least we have family.” He promises her as he honours his brother’s memory. And for the first time in his life, he understands the word to its full extent.