(no subject)
Apple Pie #9. Family
Story : knights & necromancers
Rating : PG
Timeframe : 1270's
Word Count : 1050
Sometime after Lyssa takes custody of Sham. He has some questions he'd like to ask her.
Lyssa was parked at the kitchen table, her sword bare across her knees and a polishing stone in her hand, when Shamino got up the nerve to ask her. Well, most of the nerve. He came shuffling into the room, eyes on the floor and fingers buried in his hair.
“Look,” he said, “I know this is out of the blue, but I figure…I mean, you knew Uncle Kairn for a long time, so I thought maybe…”
The scrape of stone on metal ceased and Lyssa shot him a smile that was somewhat reassuring, even if it was also a bit confused. “Spit it out already,” she said, her hand paused above the blade.
“Did you know my father?” He could feel a blush creep into his cheeks as he blurted it out.
“Well,” said Lyssa, and now she just looked confused. “That is out of the blue.“ She plunked the stone down on the table, and the sword quickly followed. “What makes you ask?”
“I-I’m sorry,” he said. “I suppose you don’t want to talk about him either then.”
“What? No, I-” She was halfway out of her chair when she sort of melted back into it with a sigh. She grabbed the chair beside it, pulled it up next to hers and patted the seat. “Come here.”
Shamino took her offer, settling into the empty chair. There was a lump growing in his throat as she sighed again and leaned in with that ‘oh you poor thing’ look he’d gotten used to receiving from her colleagues.
She snaked an arm around his shoulders and, in that slow, meant to be comforting tone that only made the thickness in his throat grow, she said “You know you’ve had a better father in your Uncle Kairn than most people get, don’t you?”
“I know, I know. And I’m not looking to replace him. Gods know I’d give anything to have him back. It’s just…I’d like the answer to ‘where do I come from?’ to be something more than ‘you’re special and a lot of bad people would like to get their hands on you.’ And anytime I ever asked Uncle Kairn about him he’d get real quiet.” He sighed, staring down at the hands now twisting in his lap rather than meet her eye. “He’d tell me about my mother all the time, and I’m sad that she’s not here, but at least I know who she was. But my father…it’s like it hurt him just to think about it. I’d hoped maybe you, I don’t know, felt differently?” he said, finally risking a look up.
The hand on his shoulder squeezed him tightly and Lyssa just stared back, all wide eyed and sad. “Oh, Sham,” she said. “I wish I could help you, and I’d tell you if I knew, but I never met him, and it’s not something Kairn ever told me either.”
“Uncle Kairn doesn’t like to talk about a lot of things, doesn’t he?”
She squeezed his shoulder again anf forced a bit of a smile. “Your uncle’s had a rough life.”
As if he didn’t know. He found himself clenching and unclenching his fists, his throat starting to burn. “Still,” he said, “he could have… I mean, now he’s gone, and I just feel like there are so many holes.”
Lyssa’s hand left his shoulder to thump against his back. “You’ve got me, kid,” she said, and her smile spread, warming a bit, as if that solved everything. “We’ll figure it out.”
“Thank you,” Sham said softly. Maybe it did. It wasn’t quite the same as having Uncle Kairn, but still-
“Of course!” Another hearty slap landed between his shoulder blades. “You know,” she said, picking up the stone. She turned it over in her hand, wrinkled her nose at it and set it back down. “You and me, we make our own funny sort of family, don’t we?”
Despite the lump that still held his throat, he had to laugh at that. “I suppose we do,” he said. “I don’t think Uncle Kairn would approve of some of your rules though.”
“Oh?” said Lyssa, fixing him with a look of mock indignation. “Which ones?”
“Most of them,” said Sham. “Loaded crossbows in the house, pie for dinner.”
“Hey! Kairn protects you his way, I’ll protect you mine. And there’s nothing wrong with pie for dinner,” she added with a wag of her finger. “It’s got…it’s got…It’ll put some meat on your bony ribs is what it’ll do,” she finished with a poke at said ribs.
Shamino followed the gesture and laughed. He was quickly learning that Lyssa could find a way, however ridiculous, to justify most anything. She was sitting there, staring at him, smiling and waiting for the next line. After a long moment of silence he blurted the other dangerous question that had been haunting him.
“So why isn’t Mara part of this family of ours?”
As soon as he said it, he wished he hadn’t. Lyssa’s jaw fell. Her hand slid from his back. He fumbled for words to take it back, but found none.
“Well,” she said, and she slowly licked her lips. “Let’s just say some people think even less of my rules than Uncle Kairn does.”
A weak and halting “oh” was the only answer he could give. After a moment he added, “But you love her, don’t you?”
“Very much,” said Lyssa. She wet her lips again and swallowed. Now she just looked sad, Sham thought. Her hand settled back on his shoulder as she struggled with the words. “Sometimes,” she said, “when you love someone, being with them just because you love them isn’t really the best thing you can do for them.”
Like Uncle Kairn is doing now. The thought hung between them without anyone ever voicing it.
“Hey,” Lyssa said at last, shoving herself to her feet, a false smile plastered across her lips. “You want some dinner? Not pie, I promise. Unless…unless you’d like pie.”
“I…uh, sure.” She was already headed for the stove, the coals lighting with a flick of her hand and a soft pop. “And whatever you want to make is fine. I never said I didn’t approve of pie for dinner.”
Story : knights & necromancers
Rating : PG
Timeframe : 1270's
Word Count : 1050
Sometime after Lyssa takes custody of Sham. He has some questions he'd like to ask her.
Lyssa was parked at the kitchen table, her sword bare across her knees and a polishing stone in her hand, when Shamino got up the nerve to ask her. Well, most of the nerve. He came shuffling into the room, eyes on the floor and fingers buried in his hair.
“Look,” he said, “I know this is out of the blue, but I figure…I mean, you knew Uncle Kairn for a long time, so I thought maybe…”
The scrape of stone on metal ceased and Lyssa shot him a smile that was somewhat reassuring, even if it was also a bit confused. “Spit it out already,” she said, her hand paused above the blade.
“Did you know my father?” He could feel a blush creep into his cheeks as he blurted it out.
“Well,” said Lyssa, and now she just looked confused. “That is out of the blue.“ She plunked the stone down on the table, and the sword quickly followed. “What makes you ask?”
“I-I’m sorry,” he said. “I suppose you don’t want to talk about him either then.”
“What? No, I-” She was halfway out of her chair when she sort of melted back into it with a sigh. She grabbed the chair beside it, pulled it up next to hers and patted the seat. “Come here.”
Shamino took her offer, settling into the empty chair. There was a lump growing in his throat as she sighed again and leaned in with that ‘oh you poor thing’ look he’d gotten used to receiving from her colleagues.
She snaked an arm around his shoulders and, in that slow, meant to be comforting tone that only made the thickness in his throat grow, she said “You know you’ve had a better father in your Uncle Kairn than most people get, don’t you?”
“I know, I know. And I’m not looking to replace him. Gods know I’d give anything to have him back. It’s just…I’d like the answer to ‘where do I come from?’ to be something more than ‘you’re special and a lot of bad people would like to get their hands on you.’ And anytime I ever asked Uncle Kairn about him he’d get real quiet.” He sighed, staring down at the hands now twisting in his lap rather than meet her eye. “He’d tell me about my mother all the time, and I’m sad that she’s not here, but at least I know who she was. But my father…it’s like it hurt him just to think about it. I’d hoped maybe you, I don’t know, felt differently?” he said, finally risking a look up.
The hand on his shoulder squeezed him tightly and Lyssa just stared back, all wide eyed and sad. “Oh, Sham,” she said. “I wish I could help you, and I’d tell you if I knew, but I never met him, and it’s not something Kairn ever told me either.”
“Uncle Kairn doesn’t like to talk about a lot of things, doesn’t he?”
She squeezed his shoulder again anf forced a bit of a smile. “Your uncle’s had a rough life.”
As if he didn’t know. He found himself clenching and unclenching his fists, his throat starting to burn. “Still,” he said, “he could have… I mean, now he’s gone, and I just feel like there are so many holes.”
Lyssa’s hand left his shoulder to thump against his back. “You’ve got me, kid,” she said, and her smile spread, warming a bit, as if that solved everything. “We’ll figure it out.”
“Thank you,” Sham said softly. Maybe it did. It wasn’t quite the same as having Uncle Kairn, but still-
“Of course!” Another hearty slap landed between his shoulder blades. “You know,” she said, picking up the stone. She turned it over in her hand, wrinkled her nose at it and set it back down. “You and me, we make our own funny sort of family, don’t we?”
Despite the lump that still held his throat, he had to laugh at that. “I suppose we do,” he said. “I don’t think Uncle Kairn would approve of some of your rules though.”
“Oh?” said Lyssa, fixing him with a look of mock indignation. “Which ones?”
“Most of them,” said Sham. “Loaded crossbows in the house, pie for dinner.”
“Hey! Kairn protects you his way, I’ll protect you mine. And there’s nothing wrong with pie for dinner,” she added with a wag of her finger. “It’s got…it’s got…It’ll put some meat on your bony ribs is what it’ll do,” she finished with a poke at said ribs.
Shamino followed the gesture and laughed. He was quickly learning that Lyssa could find a way, however ridiculous, to justify most anything. She was sitting there, staring at him, smiling and waiting for the next line. After a long moment of silence he blurted the other dangerous question that had been haunting him.
“So why isn’t Mara part of this family of ours?”
As soon as he said it, he wished he hadn’t. Lyssa’s jaw fell. Her hand slid from his back. He fumbled for words to take it back, but found none.
“Well,” she said, and she slowly licked her lips. “Let’s just say some people think even less of my rules than Uncle Kairn does.”
A weak and halting “oh” was the only answer he could give. After a moment he added, “But you love her, don’t you?”
“Very much,” said Lyssa. She wet her lips again and swallowed. Now she just looked sad, Sham thought. Her hand settled back on his shoulder as she struggled with the words. “Sometimes,” she said, “when you love someone, being with them just because you love them isn’t really the best thing you can do for them.”
Like Uncle Kairn is doing now. The thought hung between them without anyone ever voicing it.
“Hey,” Lyssa said at last, shoving herself to her feet, a false smile plastered across her lips. “You want some dinner? Not pie, I promise. Unless…unless you’d like pie.”
“I…uh, sure.” She was already headed for the stove, the coals lighting with a flick of her hand and a soft pop. “And whatever you want to make is fine. I never said I didn’t approve of pie for dinner.”