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[shayna611]

Molasses #22. False Start
Story : knights
Rating : PG-13
Timeframe : 1255 (after the library incident)
Word Count : 927

Comments

[slysionnachnano]

...aww. As much as I love watching/reading these two getting it on, this is a painful talk. *hugs them both*

I think you got the emotions down perfectly. I did like the little bit with the towel - so perfect.

Wonderful job!

[shayna611]

aww. You know it wouldn't be half as much fun to watch them get it on if there wasn't some of this beneath it.

Thank you very much! :)

[jmlowrey]

There's no other way to say it, well written.

Your descriptions are really good. "...a swath of toned abdomen and the valley where breasts met sternum" really sticks out in my mind because it combines description with more technical words.

I like it. ^_^

[shayna611]

Thank you very much! :)

[fachefaucheux]

Oooh, I liked this one a lot. Honestly, I enjoy the tension and the stress so, so much more than resolution.

Though I feel kinda bad for them both...well, not enough to encourage more tension, though. XD

[shayna611]

Thank you! :)

You know the tension never stops with them, I think that's why they're my favorite couple of all the ones I've ever written. Tension is fun :)

[ichthusfish]

Oooh! Very well done! Awkward conversation. I love Rune's reactions to half undressed Lyssa, and that she loves them too. I don't know about slowing it down a bit though. They were going pretty slow to start off with :)

[shayna611]

Woah, wait, what? They've known each other all of about 4 months and they've gotten it on on a desk. I know that's not moving super fast, but it's not exactly slow either. And you know Lyssa sure isn't going to abide by the decision ;)

And thank you! :)

[hi_falootin]

Awkward but realistic conversation :) I love that he says “You don’t have to say it just because I did.”

[shayna611]

Thank you! :)

Poor Rune just can't cut himself any breaks.