give and take (mark/eduardo)
a/n: written for this fill at the kinkmeme. :) i hope you enjoy it, OP! it's incredibly fluffy, probably too much so, but the idea of mark and wardo dancing was too cute to get out of my head. this is a silly, silly story (and no angst, goodness gracious it's like i'm growing up or something) but i hope it's at least enjoyable! this was also written for team albright, for the tsn-a-thon. :)
pairing: mark/eduardo
length: 1,294 words.
rating: pg.
warnings: language.
summary: "come on, mark. dance with me."
*
"Come on, Mark. Dance with me."
He raises an eyebrow at Wardo. "There's no way you're getting me out there." There simply isn't, because Wardo - well, he's one of those people that looks fantastic doing anything, even when he's flailing his hands around in an approximation of "dancing".
Mark isn't.
He came to this party as a gesture to Wardo, because he'd asked him, soft and shy -
(
"Mark?"
He looks up. "What is it?"
"I know you keep skipping the parties - but it might be fun, you know, if you've got someone else."
Mark raises an eyebrow. "What?" Are you asking me on a date, he'd wanted to say, but he won't - because he doesn't want to make Wardo nervous. There's nothing to be nervous about.
(There was, maybe, but Mark wasn't willing to accept it then.)
Wardo levels him with a look. "I'm asking you as a friend, to come to a party with me because you keep skipping them and Chris is about ready to have your head. I'm doing you a favor, really."
There's a smile playing at the corners of Mark's lips and he nods, quick. "Sounds good, Wardo."
)
Really, he'd agreed because of the soft pleading in Wardo's voice - the please that he didn't say but obviously meant.
He smiles down at the table, tracing a bit of condensation across it. Wardo's sitting next to him, leaning back on his chair, and Mark takes a moment to look at him, reaches over and pats him on the shoulder, awkward.
Wardo turns to him, though, smiles, and it's almost blinding.
He said yes because Wardo's back in his life and that's the greatest gift that he could have gotten, and he wants to give Wardo something back that means the same.
(
He wants Wardo to want the same way that he does, but even Mark, who's gotten more than he deserves and more than he thought he could get in Wardo as a friend, understands that's not likely to happen.
Wardo is beautiful and wonderful, goodness personified.
He's made mistakes but he's a good person.
Mark, for all that he tries to be - isn't.
He doesn't consider this to be a personal failing, on his part. Plenty of successful people aren't good in the general sense.
Those people, though, don't have a Wardo that deserves everything wonderful and more.
They both made mistakes - but they were so young. Wardo's grown up. Mark wonders if he has, as well.
)
"Are you going to dance with me?" Wardo's voice is low, like he's suggesting something - but that's silly, Mark's not nineteen anymore, okay, and he's not going to get turned on because of a voice.
Mark shrugs, and he smiles up at Wardo, soft.
It isn't that he's embarrassed - no. He's embarrassed to play video games with Chris because he always gets his ass kicked. He's embarrassed when he doesn't understand societal norms around people he likes (people like Eduardo). He's not embarrassed because he can't fucking dance.
It isn't that he can't. Not really. He just - doesn't know how, doesn't know where to begin.
He doesn't want to disappoint Wardo.
Not again.
He'd probably be excellent at it, if he were to really try, if he had a teacher.
Wardo could teach me, comes the thought, quick and unbidden, and Mark squeezes his eyes shut, shaking his head.
He and Wardo are barely friends again and he's not rocking the boat.
*
Wardo's dancing with some woman.
They look stupidly perfect together, on the dance floor - the woman is grinning at him, the floor spinning beneath their feet, and Mark closes his eyes against what he refuses to admit is hurt.
Mark has no idea who she is and he doesn't care, really. Wardo looks happy, happier than he could be if he were dancing with Mark. He's comfortable with this woman that he's just met - well, Mark doesn't know how long they've known each other for. He doesn't know anything about this Wardo, only that he likes to dance and that he's willing to forgive Mark after everything, and without an apology.
(
Mark hasn't apologized, but he will, eventually. He'll apologize and Wardo won't need it but he wants it.
Mark's just waiting for the right time - because it has to be the right time, with something like this. He has to get the words right, and right now they're all jumbled up in his brain, because he's just gotten his Wardo back and he doesn't want to mess it up with a shitty apology.
It has to mean something.
)
Wardo's dancing with some woman and Mark tries not to let the hurt show on his face but Wardo catches his eye, and excuses himself from the woman, comes over to Mark.
He holds out a hand.
"Care to dance with me?" He's smiling.
And Mark knows - he's going to lose him, if he keeps shying away from everything that makes him uncomfortable.
Mark can't dance, but he takes his hand, nodding, quick.
The song switches to something that, while not slow, isn't quick, and Wardo pulls him in close, laughing.
Mark's hands fly around before settling on his waist, and they sway back and forth.
"See, this isn't so bad, is it?" Wardo teases, and his voice is soft, only heard by Mark.
Mark smiles, shakes his head. "It's not bad at all." His arms move up, to Wardo's neck, and he shuffles closer, presses more against Wardo. "I warn you, I might step on your feet."
Wardo's arms are strong around him. "That's something I'm willing to deal with."
It's - nice, dancing with Wardo, being with him, here, and Mark sighs, resting his head on Wardo's shoulder only for a minute.
He hears a soft intake of breath and feels Wardo's grip around him tighten, almost imperceptible - but Mark's paying attention, all of his senses heightened, now.
The song ends and before Mark knows what's happening Wardo's leading him away, below some stairs, and he's staring into Mark's eyes as though they hold the meaning of life, or something.
"What?" Mark asks, soft.
And, just like that, Wardo kisses him. It's desperate, hungry, and Mark's arms snake around his neck, pull him in tight. He's on his tiptoes, trying to get as close to Wardo as he can, and he lets out a soft whimper when Wardo pulls away.
"Fuck," comes the whisper, and Wardo's straightening, brow creased. "Mark, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have - I'm sorry."
Mark levels him with a look. "What are you apologizing for?"
"For - I shouldn't have - that. Mark. I shouldn't have - taken advantage."
Mark snorts. "I'm not a child, Wardo."
"I know that," and Mark doesn't miss the way his eyes sweep up Mark's frame.
Mark steps closer. "If I didn't want that, I would have pushed you away."
"I - what?"
Mark shrugs.
Wardo blinks.
It's always been like this, between them - Wardo giving too much, Mark giving too little - and so he gives a half-smile, and presses himself against Wardo, hands on his hips, thumbs pressing against Wardo's hipbones. He kisses him, soft, and he has to go up on his tip-toes again but the way he breathes in, sharp, before kissing him back, urgent, as though he wants this too, has always wanted this, makes it worth it.
*
(
Mark apologizes, the next day.
He's sitting on his porch and Wardo's next to him.
In the end, all he has to say is - "I'm sorry for what happened."
It's not nearly enough, isn't going to be the end of the discussion on it, but Wardo reaches over, grabs his hand, and smiles at him.
Mark thinks they're going to be okay.
)
pairing: mark/eduardo
length: 1,294 words.
rating: pg.
warnings: language.
summary: "come on, mark. dance with me."
*
"Come on, Mark. Dance with me."
He raises an eyebrow at Wardo. "There's no way you're getting me out there." There simply isn't, because Wardo - well, he's one of those people that looks fantastic doing anything, even when he's flailing his hands around in an approximation of "dancing".
Mark isn't.
He came to this party as a gesture to Wardo, because he'd asked him, soft and shy -
(
"Mark?"
He looks up. "What is it?"
"I know you keep skipping the parties - but it might be fun, you know, if you've got someone else."
Mark raises an eyebrow. "What?" Are you asking me on a date, he'd wanted to say, but he won't - because he doesn't want to make Wardo nervous. There's nothing to be nervous about.
(There was, maybe, but Mark wasn't willing to accept it then.)
Wardo levels him with a look. "I'm asking you as a friend, to come to a party with me because you keep skipping them and Chris is about ready to have your head. I'm doing you a favor, really."
There's a smile playing at the corners of Mark's lips and he nods, quick. "Sounds good, Wardo."
)
Really, he'd agreed because of the soft pleading in Wardo's voice - the please that he didn't say but obviously meant.
He smiles down at the table, tracing a bit of condensation across it. Wardo's sitting next to him, leaning back on his chair, and Mark takes a moment to look at him, reaches over and pats him on the shoulder, awkward.
Wardo turns to him, though, smiles, and it's almost blinding.
He said yes because Wardo's back in his life and that's the greatest gift that he could have gotten, and he wants to give Wardo something back that means the same.
(
He wants Wardo to want the same way that he does, but even Mark, who's gotten more than he deserves and more than he thought he could get in Wardo as a friend, understands that's not likely to happen.
Wardo is beautiful and wonderful, goodness personified.
He's made mistakes but he's a good person.
Mark, for all that he tries to be - isn't.
He doesn't consider this to be a personal failing, on his part. Plenty of successful people aren't good in the general sense.
Those people, though, don't have a Wardo that deserves everything wonderful and more.
They both made mistakes - but they were so young. Wardo's grown up. Mark wonders if he has, as well.
)
"Are you going to dance with me?" Wardo's voice is low, like he's suggesting something - but that's silly, Mark's not nineteen anymore, okay, and he's not going to get turned on because of a voice.
Mark shrugs, and he smiles up at Wardo, soft.
It isn't that he's embarrassed - no. He's embarrassed to play video games with Chris because he always gets his ass kicked. He's embarrassed when he doesn't understand societal norms around people he likes (people like Eduardo). He's not embarrassed because he can't fucking dance.
It isn't that he can't. Not really. He just - doesn't know how, doesn't know where to begin.
He doesn't want to disappoint Wardo.
Not again.
He'd probably be excellent at it, if he were to really try, if he had a teacher.
Wardo could teach me, comes the thought, quick and unbidden, and Mark squeezes his eyes shut, shaking his head.
He and Wardo are barely friends again and he's not rocking the boat.
*
Wardo's dancing with some woman.
They look stupidly perfect together, on the dance floor - the woman is grinning at him, the floor spinning beneath their feet, and Mark closes his eyes against what he refuses to admit is hurt.
Mark has no idea who she is and he doesn't care, really. Wardo looks happy, happier than he could be if he were dancing with Mark. He's comfortable with this woman that he's just met - well, Mark doesn't know how long they've known each other for. He doesn't know anything about this Wardo, only that he likes to dance and that he's willing to forgive Mark after everything, and without an apology.
(
Mark hasn't apologized, but he will, eventually. He'll apologize and Wardo won't need it but he wants it.
Mark's just waiting for the right time - because it has to be the right time, with something like this. He has to get the words right, and right now they're all jumbled up in his brain, because he's just gotten his Wardo back and he doesn't want to mess it up with a shitty apology.
It has to mean something.
)
Wardo's dancing with some woman and Mark tries not to let the hurt show on his face but Wardo catches his eye, and excuses himself from the woman, comes over to Mark.
He holds out a hand.
"Care to dance with me?" He's smiling.
And Mark knows - he's going to lose him, if he keeps shying away from everything that makes him uncomfortable.
Mark can't dance, but he takes his hand, nodding, quick.
The song switches to something that, while not slow, isn't quick, and Wardo pulls him in close, laughing.
Mark's hands fly around before settling on his waist, and they sway back and forth.
"See, this isn't so bad, is it?" Wardo teases, and his voice is soft, only heard by Mark.
Mark smiles, shakes his head. "It's not bad at all." His arms move up, to Wardo's neck, and he shuffles closer, presses more against Wardo. "I warn you, I might step on your feet."
Wardo's arms are strong around him. "That's something I'm willing to deal with."
It's - nice, dancing with Wardo, being with him, here, and Mark sighs, resting his head on Wardo's shoulder only for a minute.
He hears a soft intake of breath and feels Wardo's grip around him tighten, almost imperceptible - but Mark's paying attention, all of his senses heightened, now.
The song ends and before Mark knows what's happening Wardo's leading him away, below some stairs, and he's staring into Mark's eyes as though they hold the meaning of life, or something.
"What?" Mark asks, soft.
And, just like that, Wardo kisses him. It's desperate, hungry, and Mark's arms snake around his neck, pull him in tight. He's on his tiptoes, trying to get as close to Wardo as he can, and he lets out a soft whimper when Wardo pulls away.
"Fuck," comes the whisper, and Wardo's straightening, brow creased. "Mark, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have - I'm sorry."
Mark levels him with a look. "What are you apologizing for?"
"For - I shouldn't have - that. Mark. I shouldn't have - taken advantage."
Mark snorts. "I'm not a child, Wardo."
"I know that," and Mark doesn't miss the way his eyes sweep up Mark's frame.
Mark steps closer. "If I didn't want that, I would have pushed you away."
"I - what?"
Mark shrugs.
Wardo blinks.
It's always been like this, between them - Wardo giving too much, Mark giving too little - and so he gives a half-smile, and presses himself against Wardo, hands on his hips, thumbs pressing against Wardo's hipbones. He kisses him, soft, and he has to go up on his tip-toes again but the way he breathes in, sharp, before kissing him back, urgent, as though he wants this too, has always wanted this, makes it worth it.
*
(
Mark apologizes, the next day.
He's sitting on his porch and Wardo's next to him.
In the end, all he has to say is - "I'm sorry for what happened."
It's not nearly enough, isn't going to be the end of the discussion on it, but Wardo reaches over, grabs his hand, and smiles at him.
Mark thinks they're going to be okay.
)