Fanfic
Hi!
I've started writing a fanfic specifically for this community when I first joined, but I never got around to finishing it until now ^_^ I hope you all like it!
Title: Heart's Reasons
Author: Akane-Rei
Genre: Romance (of sorts)
Rating: NC-17 (please refrain from reading if this sort of things offends you)
Pairing: Urahara x Rukia
Spoilers: Up to manga chapter 196
The summary is under the cut, as it is a spoiler to those not up to chapter 196.
Summary: Rukia confronts Urahara after getting back from Soul Society.
She went to the store before going to the school. Despite her orders being to make contact with Ichigo Kurosaki as soon as possible, she had to stop by the store first. There were things she needed to know, things she needed to understand.
And the man with the answers was staring at her through the edge of his fan as he stood by the door to his shop.
“It’s been quite awhile, hasn’t it, Kuchiki-san?” he asked mildly as he made affectations of fanning himself. His eyes gleamed underneath the brim of his hat.
“Leave us, Renji,” she muttered quietly to her companion. She gave him a sideways glance. “You should accompany the rest of them in contacting Ichigo.”
“I’m not leaving you here,” he replied tersely, giving her a stubborn look.
“Leave,” she repeated tersely. “I’ll be there shortly. This shouldn’t take long at all,” she finished, more for Urahara’s benefit than anyone else’s.
“Rukia,” Renji protested.
“I said ‘leave,’ Renji,” she said with finality. “I’ll be fine.”
“Oh yes, Abarai-kun!” Urahara added in his mildest voice. “I’ll make sure no harm comes to our Kuchiki-san.”
Rukia gave the shop owner fulminating glare before turning back to her friend. “Renji, I’ll be there soon,” she insisted. “Now go!” she ordered.
Seeing the hesitation in his eyes, she grabbed his forearm and dug her nails. “I’ll be fine,” she said again. “Trust me to deal with this.” She looked up earnestly at her childhood friend. “Please.”
He gave a resigned sigh before throwing a look of daggers at the storeowner. “If anything happens to her¾” he began.
“As I said,” Urahara said in all seriousness this time, “I’ll make sure no harm comes to Kuchiki-san.”
Renji snorted at that statement while Rukia placed a pacifying hand against his chest. “Renji, please,” she said again, her voice low. “I’ll meet you at the school.”
“Che,” he mouthed as he gave her one last look before walking away.
She watched his retreating figure disappear onto the horizon and gave a deep sigh. Renji always did worry too much about her. Something the man behind her could never be accused of. Steeling herself one more time, she turned to face the man who was almost responsible for her death. She gave their surroundings a quick look.
“Where’s everyone?” she asked nonchalantly. It was rare not to have Ururu, Jinta, or Tessai about.
“Out,” he replied curtly, his eyes returning to her after following the departure of the sixth division vice-captain. “Would you like to come in?” he invited. “I have a feeling that our business would be best conducted without any inadvertent witnesses.” He stepped inside the shop without a backwards glance.
Rukia clenched her fists and followed him. What else could she do? Didn’t she come here to get answers? At this point, she should be counting herself lucky that she actually got him alone and without distractions.
She stepped into the store and allowed her eyes to adjust to the dimness. The Urahara Shouten wasn’t known for its well-lit merchandise rooms. If anything, those rooms had less light than any of the other rooms in the shop. Most likely deliberate given who ran the store.
“I can almost hear you think dark and unpleasant thoughts about me, Kuchiki-san,” he said, turning to look at her. The singsong tone in his voice was back and his eyes stared at her in mock-innocence.
“Is that all you have to say,” she said softly. She walked towards him slowly until only about a foot separated them. “After all I’ve been through, that’s all you have to say to me?”
He snapped his fan close gave her a sideways look. “Would you like me to apologize, Kuchiki-san?” he asked quietly. “Would you like me to beg your forgiveness?” he pressed with a small smirk playing across his lips.
She ached, positively ached, to wipe that look off his face.
“I supposed I should,” he considered while he waited for her reply, “but…” he paused to give her a meaningful look, “it would be a lie.”
She looked at him in surprise and indignation.
“I would do it again,” he told her slowly. “Given the chance, I would have put the Hougyoku inside you and your gigai again.”
She slapped him.
And he let her.
She knew he could have avoided it had he wanted to, but instead he let her and she watched as his head whipped back from the force of her blow. Slowly, he turned his head back to face her, his hand rubbing the cheek where her hand had left an imprint.
He stretched his jaw a bit. “Not bad, Kuchiki-san,” he told her. “Although I would have to say that you still hit like a girl.”
She slugged his other cheek.
And again, he let her. This time, he made no pretense of it even hurting him. “Really, Kuchiki-san,” he admonished her like a child, “we both know you could do so much better.”
With a growl of rage, she flew at him with full force.
Only to have him deftly capture both her hands and as he trapped her against a wall. “But I really wish you wouldn’t do it today,” he whispered against her ear.
She struggled, her eyes blazing as she tried to kick his shins from her position.
“Stop it,” he ordered, his hands tightening their hold of her arms.
Still, she continued despite knowing how futile it would be. She didn’t know what else she could do and this, at least, provided some sort of outlet for all the feelings she had been bottling up.
“Stop it,” he said again, shaking her this time.
“Bastard!” she hissed.
“Now, Kuchiki-san,” he reprimanded her in a kind voice. His hold on her was firm but gentle.
She knew he was trying to avoid hurting her.
Well, too little too late for that.
With renewed vigor, she wrenched one of her hands from his grip and clawed his face. She watched almost in slow motion as her nails scraped his cheek, drawing blood.
She smiled and continued her attack in earnest.
“Stop it, Kuchiki-san!” he demanded this time.
He was having a tough time of it, she could tell, because he was trying oh-so-hard to be careful. And that was the difference right now between the two of them. She was past caring.
She realized she had been for a long time.
“Kuchiki-san!” he said again, this time with an edge to his tone. “You’re only hurting yourself by doing this.” He used one hand to hold both of her over her head. “This is pointless.”
“Pointless?” she whispered. “Pointless?” she said louder this time.
“Yes,” he told her sternly, his body trapping hers in place. “We both know I’m not only bigger but also stronger and a more experienced shinigami. The winner of this struggle is predetermined. Why hurt yourself in something so futile?”
“Maybe because I don’t care,” she spat. “I don’t care if I get hurt as longs as-”
“Don’t lie, Kuchiki-san,” he berated her. “If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be here.”
She looked away.
“Bastard,” she said again, this time her voice was a little shaky.
“Why are you so upset, Kuchiki-san?” he asked slyly. “Did I not provide an adequate rescue team? Wasn’t Kurosaki-kun and company there in time to save you?”
“Ugh!” she tried to push him away.
He held on and pushed her back against the wall, leaning even closer. “Didn’t I make sure he and his friends made it in time? Didn’t I send Yoruichi to help even?”
She could feel his lips brushing her ear, his hands holding her arms tight as his chest pressed against hers.
“Didn’t I train Kurosaki and enable his friends Chad and Inoue to be trained as well by Yoruichi? She even used my techniques to help that boy achieve bankai! What more could you ask for, Kuchki-san?”
“How about not putting the damn Houyoku inside me in the first place?” she yelled. She felt him wince at the sound of her loud voice so close to his ear. “How about giving me a regular gigai so that I could have regained my powers and returned to Soul Society with no one the wiser?! Of all the stupid and most…ugh!” She took a deep breath…and asked the question she had been wanting to ask from the very beginning. “Why did you do it? After everything that’s happened between us, why did you do it?”
“Ahh…” he signed, touching his forehead against the wall behind her. “Is that why you’re upset? Because you couldn’t have gone back to Soul Society as planned? Where your friend Abarai-kun was recently promoted, I heard.”
She turned her head to meet his eyes. “When exactly did you hear that?”
“Perhaps an hour or two before you arrived for your first solo stationary mission,” he told her. He lifted her chin with his had to face him more fully. “Tell me, Kuchiki-san, if you had come back to Soul Society as scheduled and Abarai-kun had approached you, what would you have done?”
“Approached me?” she repeated. “Approached me about what?”
“Stop playing dumb,” he growled. “Even I knew that that childhood friend of yours had been biding his time and waiting for the right moment to declare himself. That promotion would have been the trigger he had been waiting for.”
“Declare himself?” she asked, confused as to why they were even discussing Renji.
“Would you have taken him back, Kuchiki-san?” he asked roughly, almost shaking her. “Would you have taken him back as your lover even after he had let you go that time long ago?”
What the hell? “You’re insane!” she almost screeched.
“You would have, wouldn’t you?” he demanded. “I know you. I knew you. You would have come running in his arms the moment you were back and he approached you with his news.” She shoved her away from as he stepped back, looking at her with fire in his eyes.
“Are you crazy?” she ranted. She looked up at him from her small height and pressed a pointed finger at the middle of his chest. “No, not crazy,” she recanted, “just jealous. Is that what this was all about? You put that damn Hougyoku inside of me all because you were jealous?”
He snorted.
“You were jealous of Renji and-”
“You’re mistaken,” he said evenly. “I did not, as you so succinctly put it, put that damn Hougyoku inside of you because of jealousy.” He smirked. “That was just the icing on the cake.”
“Son of a-” she slapped him again.
Only this time, he caught her hand and pulled her towards him.
He kissed her. With one hand catching both of hers and holding them in prison, and another hand holding her mouth in place, he kissed her with a roughness he’d never done before.
Whether to shut her up or because he just wanted to, she didn’t know. She didn’t care.
Did he think he could just kiss her and everything would go back to the way they were?
She bit his lip.
But he wouldn’t let go and his tongue was pushing its way inside her mouth despite her unresponsive lips.
She bit him again. Hard.
Hard enough to startle him. Hard enough for him to bleed. She needed him to stop. He had to stop before she succumbed. He had to let her go before-
Still, he wouldn’t let go. Instead, his lips traveled to her neck, leaving a hot trail of blood in its wake. The hand that held her mouth now occupied itself with the buttons of her blouse, quickly dispensing of them and the ribbon on her collar.
She could feel his teeth scrape her collarbone and she shivered, wondering whether he would retaliate for those bites she had given him. She could feel still feel where his lips had been, could still imagine the pressure against her mouth.
He began to suck at the juncture of her neck.
Her knees wobbled and she felt his hands quickly let go of their previous hold and steady her by her waist. His fingers wrapped around her, easily spanning her small figure as he lifted her up to eye level. Her legs wrapped around him instinctively, and she could feel the familiar hardness resting insistently against her thighs.
He carried her to his room while kissing her again.
Her arms found themselves wrapped around his neck, her hand dislodging his hat somewhere along the way. In the rational part of her mind, she knew she should be protesting and fighting and doing everything she could possibly do to stop this. After all, he had betrayed her! He’d almost gotten her killed!
But she was past rational. In fact, she began to wonder whether maybe it was this that she had really come here for. Was all her indignant rage and affronted pride just an excuse?
“Stop thinking,” he said between kisses.
And she did.
He used one of his hands to slide the door to his room close. She expected him to bring her to his futon where they could do this more comfortably as they had done in the past, except he seemed more interested in keeping her where she was.
Not that she minded.
He walked until her back was against a wall. She grabbed hold of his shoulders to steady herself while his hands cupped her bottom for support.
“I want you this way,” he muttered against her neck. “I’ve wanted it since I felt you wriggle your little body against me while you fought.”
“I-” she began to say something incoherent, but her mouth became too busy raining kisses across the exposed skin of his chest. She pushed off his haori and kimono, untying his belt with her clumsy fingers. Damn gigai could barely cooperate with what she wanted it to do.
She could hear him groan as his hands slid her panties off and almost tore them in his haste.
“Now, Rukia,” he rasped as he fumbled a little with his pants. A quick flick of his fingers verified her readiness for him while she gasped at the feel of his calluses against something so sensitive. And with no further preliminaries, he lifted her slightly only to slam her back down against his waiting manhood.
She could feel herself stretched and she fought down the cry of surprise that wanted to escape from her lips. He was already moving roughly against her, his pace a little too fast for her to keep up with. She leaned her forehead against his chest and tried to catch her breath. She felt full. Too full. He was pounding her against the wall and-
“Don’t!” his voice was hoarse as left hand cupped her face so that he could force her to look at him. He shifted his position a little, bracing her against the wall behind her.
“What are you-”
His hands moved, explored. They went underneath her scrunched up skirt and he touched that spot just above where they were joined. She let out an involuntary groan when his fingers flicked and rubbed the sensitive nubbin. Suddenly, instead of feeling too stretched or too full, everything felt just right and she wanted him to just-
“Move,” she demanded.
And of course he complied. But not without giving her that annoyingly knowing smirk of his-something she completely wiped out of his face when she tightened her legs around his waist and clamped her mouth just above his chest.
She could both hear and feel the growling sounds he was making at the back of his throat. His thrusts were getting much faster and the friction was hotter and she could feel the muscles in his shoulders bunch up while her nails dug deeper.
She could hear someone moaning, and barely had the time to realize that it was from her lips the sounds were coming from when he cupped her face with one hand kissed her. He captured all the groans and sighs she made. She was losing herself like she always did with him. She was mindless of everything but the feel and the smell and the sounds of him.
“Soon, Rukia,” he growled, in between kisses.
She could feel his pace increase, but she didn’t mind. She could match him move for move, thrust for thrust. Soon, that tiny ball of pressure that built up in her lower belly finally exploded and all she could feel were the involuntary shivers that wracked her body even as he pounded her one last time.
In the back of her mind, she could remember when they both finally collapsed on the floor. She remembered thinking how careful he had been to make sure he didn’t drop her, remembered the tightening of his arms around her small frame before situated himself on top of her. He didn’t make it to the futon and she couldn’t bring herself to care. She’d almost forgotten how much she loved having his weight press down against her afterwards, almost forgotten the feeling of security she reveled in during these moments.
She had no idea how long they stayed there before he began to move again.
“Why didn’t you come to me?” he whispered as his breathing struggled to come back to normal.
She looked up at him, startled.
“What do you mean why didn’t I come to-”
“I ask the questions now,” he told her abruptly. “After everything that’s happened between us,” he threw her words back to him, “why didn’t you come to me that night? Or even before that?” He lifted himself above her, taking his weight off her body yet trapping her at the same time. “You knew they were coming for you. You knew long before you ran.” His right hand touched her cheek. “Why didn’t you come to me?”
She tried to look away, but his other hand held her face in place.
“Rukia,” he said her name for the first time that day. “Out of all my machinations, that was the one miscalculation on my part,” he told her. “I had thought…that you would come to me,” he said with uncharacteristic gentleness. “And I would have been able to protect you.”
She bit her lip. “Hide me, you mean,” she said with a touch of bitterness.
“Yes,” he replied. “That had been the plan all along.”
She laughed mirthlessly. “That would have been nice to know at that time,” she retorted.
He remained silent, looking at her with those reproachful eyes. “You should have come to me,” he stated again.
She snorted. “I did come to you, remember?” she asked scornfully. “That’s how I ended up with one of your rare gigais.”
“It was I who came to you in your hour of need then,” he argued. “And I gave you that gigai because-” he stopped abruptly.
“Because,” she prompted.
“Because nothing,” he said instead.
Rukia shifted uncomfortably. “Nothing, huh?” she echoed, looking closely at his eyes.
Outside, the sounds of people entering the shop made itself known.
She swallowed and pushed him away as she sat down. “I need to go,” she said softly, her thoughts racing. “I don’t want them to find me here.”
He laughed bitterly. “Don’t want it known that you’re consorting with an exiled shinigami?”
She frowned, looking at him closely. She had been stupid. Stupid about this and stupid about him. All the while, all the answers she sought had been quite plain for her to see. “That’s not it,” she responded tersely.
“Ah, Kuchiki-san,” he sighed, “how quickly you toss me away,” he said half-jokingly, his serious mood seemingly forgotten.
She could feel her heart beating rapidly once again at her discovery.
She had to get her mind off it. She needed to get out of here.
She stood from the floor and looked at her rumpled clothing. Her blouse was in disarray, some of the buttons torn off. At least her skirt seemed repairable as it only seemed to suffer a few creases from their activities. Now as for underwear…she looked around.
“Looking for these?” he asked her playfully holding a pair of pink Chappy panties from his position on the floor.
She snatched them from his fingertips.
“You probably don’t want to wear that,” he advised her. “It’s a little…damp. As luck would have it, though, I do have some supply of fresh undies as well as a new school blouse,” he told her.
“And how much would those cost me?” she asked disparagingly, deliberately trying to put some distance between them.
“Why for you, Kuchiki-san, I’ll give them for free,” he said merrily, although she could see the shadow that briefly passed before his eyes. “This time.” He stood up, hitching his pants around his waist while he winked at her. He didn’t bother to put his top back on or his hat, but hell, his getas were still on.
Rukia almost giggled at the thought of him and sex and his wooden sandals.
He opened his closet and rummaged through before he found what he was looking for. “Here it is!” he exclaimed. He turned to face her. “You left them here last time,” he reminded her.
She took the blouse and panties from him and gave him a pointed glare.
“What?” he asked innocently.
“I need to change,” she informed him.
“Your point being?” he asked obtusely.
“I’d like some privacy,” she bit the words out.
This time he laughed whole-heartedly. “Don’t you think it’s a little too late for modesty, Kuchiki-san?” he asked with a swift flick of his fan. “I’ve seen all you’ve had to…offer.”
“I said I’d like some privacy,” she repeated, clutching the clothes against her chest. And she did. It was one thing to be undressed in front of him when they were in the middle of making love…of sex. Sex, she repeated to herself. That’s all this could ever be. It was one thing to be undressed in front of him when they were in the middle of sex, but quite another to have him watch her put on clothes.
For some insanely irrational reason, putting on clothes felt almost as intimate.
“What would you do if I said ‘no’?” he asked suggestively.
“You are such a bastard,” she hissed.
“You’ve said that already, but then,” he gave her a sideways look, “you love me anyway,” he said in a singsong voice that he knew would guarantee to irritate her.
“You little-” She meant to give a scathing comeback, but whatever it was she was about to say remained lodged in her throat when she met his eyes. They were twinkling merrily, as if he had a joke he was willing to share, but before they twinkled, she could have sworn she saw-
She turned away and bit her lip. Turning her back to him, she began to take off her tattered blouse.
She needed to get out of there and if changing in front of him was going to get out of there quicker, then by all means!
She had just dropped the blouse to the floor when she felt his presence behind her. “What is it this time?” she mouthed off. Surprisingly, instead of answering her, she felt his arms wrap around her shoulders and her neck from behind.
“Rukia,” he said softly, resting his cheek on the top of her head.
She steeled herself against the surge of emotions than ran through her before casually stepping out of his embrace. Quickly, she donned the fresh clothing, intensely aware of the eyes that stared at her from behind. Once properly and decently attired, she walked towards the rice paper door. She placed her hand against the screen and paused.
Why couldn’t she just walk away?
Without looking at him, she said, “To answer your question awhile ago,” she licked her lips, “about why I didn’t come to you…I guess I was protecting you. I didn’t want Soul Society to come here and make a mess of the life you’ve made for yourself.”
She gave a bittersweet smile, knowing he couldn’t see it. “And just so you know, you didn’t have to put me in a gigai that would have eventually drained my powers and synchronized with me 100% in order to get me to stay here,” she said softly. “That was why you did it, wasn’t it?” She swallowed. “The fact that the gigai was untraceable and you could also hide the Hougyoku was just the icing in your plans.” She took a deep breath. “All of this was done because you couldn’t ask me to stay.”
He didn’t answer her and she didn’t look back.
“If you had asked me to stay,” she said softly, “I just might have.” She shook her head. “But then again, if I had trusted you more and come to you that night, maybe I’d still be here too. Then where would we be?”
And with that, she slid the door open and left the room. She had a mission to complete, after all.
The End
I've started writing a fanfic specifically for this community when I first joined, but I never got around to finishing it until now ^_^ I hope you all like it!
Title: Heart's Reasons
Author: Akane-Rei
Genre: Romance (of sorts)
Rating: NC-17 (please refrain from reading if this sort of things offends you)
Pairing: Urahara x Rukia
Spoilers: Up to manga chapter 196
The summary is under the cut, as it is a spoiler to those not up to chapter 196.
Summary: Rukia confronts Urahara after getting back from Soul Society.
She went to the store before going to the school. Despite her orders being to make contact with Ichigo Kurosaki as soon as possible, she had to stop by the store first. There were things she needed to know, things she needed to understand.
And the man with the answers was staring at her through the edge of his fan as he stood by the door to his shop.
“It’s been quite awhile, hasn’t it, Kuchiki-san?” he asked mildly as he made affectations of fanning himself. His eyes gleamed underneath the brim of his hat.
“Leave us, Renji,” she muttered quietly to her companion. She gave him a sideways glance. “You should accompany the rest of them in contacting Ichigo.”
“I’m not leaving you here,” he replied tersely, giving her a stubborn look.
“Leave,” she repeated tersely. “I’ll be there shortly. This shouldn’t take long at all,” she finished, more for Urahara’s benefit than anyone else’s.
“Rukia,” Renji protested.
“I said ‘leave,’ Renji,” she said with finality. “I’ll be fine.”
“Oh yes, Abarai-kun!” Urahara added in his mildest voice. “I’ll make sure no harm comes to our Kuchiki-san.”
Rukia gave the shop owner fulminating glare before turning back to her friend. “Renji, I’ll be there soon,” she insisted. “Now go!” she ordered.
Seeing the hesitation in his eyes, she grabbed his forearm and dug her nails. “I’ll be fine,” she said again. “Trust me to deal with this.” She looked up earnestly at her childhood friend. “Please.”
He gave a resigned sigh before throwing a look of daggers at the storeowner. “If anything happens to her¾” he began.
“As I said,” Urahara said in all seriousness this time, “I’ll make sure no harm comes to Kuchiki-san.”
Renji snorted at that statement while Rukia placed a pacifying hand against his chest. “Renji, please,” she said again, her voice low. “I’ll meet you at the school.”
“Che,” he mouthed as he gave her one last look before walking away.
She watched his retreating figure disappear onto the horizon and gave a deep sigh. Renji always did worry too much about her. Something the man behind her could never be accused of. Steeling herself one more time, she turned to face the man who was almost responsible for her death. She gave their surroundings a quick look.
“Where’s everyone?” she asked nonchalantly. It was rare not to have Ururu, Jinta, or Tessai about.
“Out,” he replied curtly, his eyes returning to her after following the departure of the sixth division vice-captain. “Would you like to come in?” he invited. “I have a feeling that our business would be best conducted without any inadvertent witnesses.” He stepped inside the shop without a backwards glance.
Rukia clenched her fists and followed him. What else could she do? Didn’t she come here to get answers? At this point, she should be counting herself lucky that she actually got him alone and without distractions.
She stepped into the store and allowed her eyes to adjust to the dimness. The Urahara Shouten wasn’t known for its well-lit merchandise rooms. If anything, those rooms had less light than any of the other rooms in the shop. Most likely deliberate given who ran the store.
“I can almost hear you think dark and unpleasant thoughts about me, Kuchiki-san,” he said, turning to look at her. The singsong tone in his voice was back and his eyes stared at her in mock-innocence.
“Is that all you have to say,” she said softly. She walked towards him slowly until only about a foot separated them. “After all I’ve been through, that’s all you have to say to me?”
He snapped his fan close gave her a sideways look. “Would you like me to apologize, Kuchiki-san?” he asked quietly. “Would you like me to beg your forgiveness?” he pressed with a small smirk playing across his lips.
She ached, positively ached, to wipe that look off his face.
“I supposed I should,” he considered while he waited for her reply, “but…” he paused to give her a meaningful look, “it would be a lie.”
She looked at him in surprise and indignation.
“I would do it again,” he told her slowly. “Given the chance, I would have put the Hougyoku inside you and your gigai again.”
She slapped him.
And he let her.
She knew he could have avoided it had he wanted to, but instead he let her and she watched as his head whipped back from the force of her blow. Slowly, he turned his head back to face her, his hand rubbing the cheek where her hand had left an imprint.
He stretched his jaw a bit. “Not bad, Kuchiki-san,” he told her. “Although I would have to say that you still hit like a girl.”
She slugged his other cheek.
And again, he let her. This time, he made no pretense of it even hurting him. “Really, Kuchiki-san,” he admonished her like a child, “we both know you could do so much better.”
With a growl of rage, she flew at him with full force.
Only to have him deftly capture both her hands and as he trapped her against a wall. “But I really wish you wouldn’t do it today,” he whispered against her ear.
She struggled, her eyes blazing as she tried to kick his shins from her position.
“Stop it,” he ordered, his hands tightening their hold of her arms.
Still, she continued despite knowing how futile it would be. She didn’t know what else she could do and this, at least, provided some sort of outlet for all the feelings she had been bottling up.
“Stop it,” he said again, shaking her this time.
“Bastard!” she hissed.
“Now, Kuchiki-san,” he reprimanded her in a kind voice. His hold on her was firm but gentle.
She knew he was trying to avoid hurting her.
Well, too little too late for that.
With renewed vigor, she wrenched one of her hands from his grip and clawed his face. She watched almost in slow motion as her nails scraped his cheek, drawing blood.
She smiled and continued her attack in earnest.
“Stop it, Kuchiki-san!” he demanded this time.
He was having a tough time of it, she could tell, because he was trying oh-so-hard to be careful. And that was the difference right now between the two of them. She was past caring.
She realized she had been for a long time.
“Kuchiki-san!” he said again, this time with an edge to his tone. “You’re only hurting yourself by doing this.” He used one hand to hold both of her over her head. “This is pointless.”
“Pointless?” she whispered. “Pointless?” she said louder this time.
“Yes,” he told her sternly, his body trapping hers in place. “We both know I’m not only bigger but also stronger and a more experienced shinigami. The winner of this struggle is predetermined. Why hurt yourself in something so futile?”
“Maybe because I don’t care,” she spat. “I don’t care if I get hurt as longs as-”
“Don’t lie, Kuchiki-san,” he berated her. “If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be here.”
She looked away.
“Bastard,” she said again, this time her voice was a little shaky.
“Why are you so upset, Kuchiki-san?” he asked slyly. “Did I not provide an adequate rescue team? Wasn’t Kurosaki-kun and company there in time to save you?”
“Ugh!” she tried to push him away.
He held on and pushed her back against the wall, leaning even closer. “Didn’t I make sure he and his friends made it in time? Didn’t I send Yoruichi to help even?”
She could feel his lips brushing her ear, his hands holding her arms tight as his chest pressed against hers.
“Didn’t I train Kurosaki and enable his friends Chad and Inoue to be trained as well by Yoruichi? She even used my techniques to help that boy achieve bankai! What more could you ask for, Kuchki-san?”
“How about not putting the damn Houyoku inside me in the first place?” she yelled. She felt him wince at the sound of her loud voice so close to his ear. “How about giving me a regular gigai so that I could have regained my powers and returned to Soul Society with no one the wiser?! Of all the stupid and most…ugh!” She took a deep breath…and asked the question she had been wanting to ask from the very beginning. “Why did you do it? After everything that’s happened between us, why did you do it?”
“Ahh…” he signed, touching his forehead against the wall behind her. “Is that why you’re upset? Because you couldn’t have gone back to Soul Society as planned? Where your friend Abarai-kun was recently promoted, I heard.”
She turned her head to meet his eyes. “When exactly did you hear that?”
“Perhaps an hour or two before you arrived for your first solo stationary mission,” he told her. He lifted her chin with his had to face him more fully. “Tell me, Kuchiki-san, if you had come back to Soul Society as scheduled and Abarai-kun had approached you, what would you have done?”
“Approached me?” she repeated. “Approached me about what?”
“Stop playing dumb,” he growled. “Even I knew that that childhood friend of yours had been biding his time and waiting for the right moment to declare himself. That promotion would have been the trigger he had been waiting for.”
“Declare himself?” she asked, confused as to why they were even discussing Renji.
“Would you have taken him back, Kuchiki-san?” he asked roughly, almost shaking her. “Would you have taken him back as your lover even after he had let you go that time long ago?”
What the hell? “You’re insane!” she almost screeched.
“You would have, wouldn’t you?” he demanded. “I know you. I knew you. You would have come running in his arms the moment you were back and he approached you with his news.” She shoved her away from as he stepped back, looking at her with fire in his eyes.
“Are you crazy?” she ranted. She looked up at him from her small height and pressed a pointed finger at the middle of his chest. “No, not crazy,” she recanted, “just jealous. Is that what this was all about? You put that damn Hougyoku inside of me all because you were jealous?”
He snorted.
“You were jealous of Renji and-”
“You’re mistaken,” he said evenly. “I did not, as you so succinctly put it, put that damn Hougyoku inside of you because of jealousy.” He smirked. “That was just the icing on the cake.”
“Son of a-” she slapped him again.
Only this time, he caught her hand and pulled her towards him.
He kissed her. With one hand catching both of hers and holding them in prison, and another hand holding her mouth in place, he kissed her with a roughness he’d never done before.
Whether to shut her up or because he just wanted to, she didn’t know. She didn’t care.
Did he think he could just kiss her and everything would go back to the way they were?
She bit his lip.
But he wouldn’t let go and his tongue was pushing its way inside her mouth despite her unresponsive lips.
She bit him again. Hard.
Hard enough to startle him. Hard enough for him to bleed. She needed him to stop. He had to stop before she succumbed. He had to let her go before-
Still, he wouldn’t let go. Instead, his lips traveled to her neck, leaving a hot trail of blood in its wake. The hand that held her mouth now occupied itself with the buttons of her blouse, quickly dispensing of them and the ribbon on her collar.
She could feel his teeth scrape her collarbone and she shivered, wondering whether he would retaliate for those bites she had given him. She could feel still feel where his lips had been, could still imagine the pressure against her mouth.
He began to suck at the juncture of her neck.
Her knees wobbled and she felt his hands quickly let go of their previous hold and steady her by her waist. His fingers wrapped around her, easily spanning her small figure as he lifted her up to eye level. Her legs wrapped around him instinctively, and she could feel the familiar hardness resting insistently against her thighs.
He carried her to his room while kissing her again.
Her arms found themselves wrapped around his neck, her hand dislodging his hat somewhere along the way. In the rational part of her mind, she knew she should be protesting and fighting and doing everything she could possibly do to stop this. After all, he had betrayed her! He’d almost gotten her killed!
But she was past rational. In fact, she began to wonder whether maybe it was this that she had really come here for. Was all her indignant rage and affronted pride just an excuse?
“Stop thinking,” he said between kisses.
And she did.
He used one of his hands to slide the door to his room close. She expected him to bring her to his futon where they could do this more comfortably as they had done in the past, except he seemed more interested in keeping her where she was.
Not that she minded.
He walked until her back was against a wall. She grabbed hold of his shoulders to steady herself while his hands cupped her bottom for support.
“I want you this way,” he muttered against her neck. “I’ve wanted it since I felt you wriggle your little body against me while you fought.”
“I-” she began to say something incoherent, but her mouth became too busy raining kisses across the exposed skin of his chest. She pushed off his haori and kimono, untying his belt with her clumsy fingers. Damn gigai could barely cooperate with what she wanted it to do.
She could hear him groan as his hands slid her panties off and almost tore them in his haste.
“Now, Rukia,” he rasped as he fumbled a little with his pants. A quick flick of his fingers verified her readiness for him while she gasped at the feel of his calluses against something so sensitive. And with no further preliminaries, he lifted her slightly only to slam her back down against his waiting manhood.
She could feel herself stretched and she fought down the cry of surprise that wanted to escape from her lips. He was already moving roughly against her, his pace a little too fast for her to keep up with. She leaned her forehead against his chest and tried to catch her breath. She felt full. Too full. He was pounding her against the wall and-
“Don’t!” his voice was hoarse as left hand cupped her face so that he could force her to look at him. He shifted his position a little, bracing her against the wall behind her.
“What are you-”
His hands moved, explored. They went underneath her scrunched up skirt and he touched that spot just above where they were joined. She let out an involuntary groan when his fingers flicked and rubbed the sensitive nubbin. Suddenly, instead of feeling too stretched or too full, everything felt just right and she wanted him to just-
“Move,” she demanded.
And of course he complied. But not without giving her that annoyingly knowing smirk of his-something she completely wiped out of his face when she tightened her legs around his waist and clamped her mouth just above his chest.
She could both hear and feel the growling sounds he was making at the back of his throat. His thrusts were getting much faster and the friction was hotter and she could feel the muscles in his shoulders bunch up while her nails dug deeper.
She could hear someone moaning, and barely had the time to realize that it was from her lips the sounds were coming from when he cupped her face with one hand kissed her. He captured all the groans and sighs she made. She was losing herself like she always did with him. She was mindless of everything but the feel and the smell and the sounds of him.
“Soon, Rukia,” he growled, in between kisses.
She could feel his pace increase, but she didn’t mind. She could match him move for move, thrust for thrust. Soon, that tiny ball of pressure that built up in her lower belly finally exploded and all she could feel were the involuntary shivers that wracked her body even as he pounded her one last time.
In the back of her mind, she could remember when they both finally collapsed on the floor. She remembered thinking how careful he had been to make sure he didn’t drop her, remembered the tightening of his arms around her small frame before situated himself on top of her. He didn’t make it to the futon and she couldn’t bring herself to care. She’d almost forgotten how much she loved having his weight press down against her afterwards, almost forgotten the feeling of security she reveled in during these moments.
She had no idea how long they stayed there before he began to move again.
“Why didn’t you come to me?” he whispered as his breathing struggled to come back to normal.
She looked up at him, startled.
“What do you mean why didn’t I come to-”
“I ask the questions now,” he told her abruptly. “After everything that’s happened between us,” he threw her words back to him, “why didn’t you come to me that night? Or even before that?” He lifted himself above her, taking his weight off her body yet trapping her at the same time. “You knew they were coming for you. You knew long before you ran.” His right hand touched her cheek. “Why didn’t you come to me?”
She tried to look away, but his other hand held her face in place.
“Rukia,” he said her name for the first time that day. “Out of all my machinations, that was the one miscalculation on my part,” he told her. “I had thought…that you would come to me,” he said with uncharacteristic gentleness. “And I would have been able to protect you.”
She bit her lip. “Hide me, you mean,” she said with a touch of bitterness.
“Yes,” he replied. “That had been the plan all along.”
She laughed mirthlessly. “That would have been nice to know at that time,” she retorted.
He remained silent, looking at her with those reproachful eyes. “You should have come to me,” he stated again.
She snorted. “I did come to you, remember?” she asked scornfully. “That’s how I ended up with one of your rare gigais.”
“It was I who came to you in your hour of need then,” he argued. “And I gave you that gigai because-” he stopped abruptly.
“Because,” she prompted.
“Because nothing,” he said instead.
Rukia shifted uncomfortably. “Nothing, huh?” she echoed, looking closely at his eyes.
Outside, the sounds of people entering the shop made itself known.
She swallowed and pushed him away as she sat down. “I need to go,” she said softly, her thoughts racing. “I don’t want them to find me here.”
He laughed bitterly. “Don’t want it known that you’re consorting with an exiled shinigami?”
She frowned, looking at him closely. She had been stupid. Stupid about this and stupid about him. All the while, all the answers she sought had been quite plain for her to see. “That’s not it,” she responded tersely.
“Ah, Kuchiki-san,” he sighed, “how quickly you toss me away,” he said half-jokingly, his serious mood seemingly forgotten.
She could feel her heart beating rapidly once again at her discovery.
She had to get her mind off it. She needed to get out of here.
She stood from the floor and looked at her rumpled clothing. Her blouse was in disarray, some of the buttons torn off. At least her skirt seemed repairable as it only seemed to suffer a few creases from their activities. Now as for underwear…she looked around.
“Looking for these?” he asked her playfully holding a pair of pink Chappy panties from his position on the floor.
She snatched them from his fingertips.
“You probably don’t want to wear that,” he advised her. “It’s a little…damp. As luck would have it, though, I do have some supply of fresh undies as well as a new school blouse,” he told her.
“And how much would those cost me?” she asked disparagingly, deliberately trying to put some distance between them.
“Why for you, Kuchiki-san, I’ll give them for free,” he said merrily, although she could see the shadow that briefly passed before his eyes. “This time.” He stood up, hitching his pants around his waist while he winked at her. He didn’t bother to put his top back on or his hat, but hell, his getas were still on.
Rukia almost giggled at the thought of him and sex and his wooden sandals.
He opened his closet and rummaged through before he found what he was looking for. “Here it is!” he exclaimed. He turned to face her. “You left them here last time,” he reminded her.
She took the blouse and panties from him and gave him a pointed glare.
“What?” he asked innocently.
“I need to change,” she informed him.
“Your point being?” he asked obtusely.
“I’d like some privacy,” she bit the words out.
This time he laughed whole-heartedly. “Don’t you think it’s a little too late for modesty, Kuchiki-san?” he asked with a swift flick of his fan. “I’ve seen all you’ve had to…offer.”
“I said I’d like some privacy,” she repeated, clutching the clothes against her chest. And she did. It was one thing to be undressed in front of him when they were in the middle of making love…of sex. Sex, she repeated to herself. That’s all this could ever be. It was one thing to be undressed in front of him when they were in the middle of sex, but quite another to have him watch her put on clothes.
For some insanely irrational reason, putting on clothes felt almost as intimate.
“What would you do if I said ‘no’?” he asked suggestively.
“You are such a bastard,” she hissed.
“You’ve said that already, but then,” he gave her a sideways look, “you love me anyway,” he said in a singsong voice that he knew would guarantee to irritate her.
“You little-” She meant to give a scathing comeback, but whatever it was she was about to say remained lodged in her throat when she met his eyes. They were twinkling merrily, as if he had a joke he was willing to share, but before they twinkled, she could have sworn she saw-
She turned away and bit her lip. Turning her back to him, she began to take off her tattered blouse.
She needed to get out of there and if changing in front of him was going to get out of there quicker, then by all means!
She had just dropped the blouse to the floor when she felt his presence behind her. “What is it this time?” she mouthed off. Surprisingly, instead of answering her, she felt his arms wrap around her shoulders and her neck from behind.
“Rukia,” he said softly, resting his cheek on the top of her head.
She steeled herself against the surge of emotions than ran through her before casually stepping out of his embrace. Quickly, she donned the fresh clothing, intensely aware of the eyes that stared at her from behind. Once properly and decently attired, she walked towards the rice paper door. She placed her hand against the screen and paused.
Why couldn’t she just walk away?
Without looking at him, she said, “To answer your question awhile ago,” she licked her lips, “about why I didn’t come to you…I guess I was protecting you. I didn’t want Soul Society to come here and make a mess of the life you’ve made for yourself.”
She gave a bittersweet smile, knowing he couldn’t see it. “And just so you know, you didn’t have to put me in a gigai that would have eventually drained my powers and synchronized with me 100% in order to get me to stay here,” she said softly. “That was why you did it, wasn’t it?” She swallowed. “The fact that the gigai was untraceable and you could also hide the Hougyoku was just the icing in your plans.” She took a deep breath. “All of this was done because you couldn’t ask me to stay.”
He didn’t answer her and she didn’t look back.
“If you had asked me to stay,” she said softly, “I just might have.” She shook her head. “But then again, if I had trusted you more and come to you that night, maybe I’d still be here too. Then where would we be?”
And with that, she slid the door open and left the room. She had a mission to complete, after all.
The End