instruction manuel
so i realize that i need to write adn instruction manuel that i give to teh person that i am dateing. it outlinesmy behavioral paters, likes, dislikes, alergies, washing preferences, movies, books adn feeding schedual.
below is an anotitated table of contents
behavioral pattern:
andrew is a solitary creatuer adn feircly independent and not big into PDA. things burn hot for about the first 3 months then hit a cooling off period of a few weeks but do not panic he will be backand things will progress ona deep adn satisfying natuer. this behavior will happen ocasionaly but the next planed period od mantinace that results in this behavior is at teh 2 year mark.
Feeding
food on a re3gular ocasion is a good thing adn do not forget the watter. or Grand Ma or Vodka they all lead to a long adn happy life of your andrew.
mood of conversation
they range from teh mundane to the esotaric, gt him inthe right mood and he will not shut up or put him in front of a bunch of people adn the chatter wiill begin, but other wise he is a quiet adn contomplative personthatthinks befor he speeks.
friends
andrew's are fiercly loyal to their friends so don't piss them off cause you wil not get any warnign signs, its 0 to 180 and he is not a nice person when he is mad or pissed off.
Family
do not under any circumstance mmake any situation that results in him deciding between you and his family. you will ALWAYS loose, unless plans have been made before hand then it will be a great deal of compromising to make both parties happy. these situations do not happen very often or with any regularity, but if they do just stay calm and your andrew will make it up to you and be much more greatful for your understanding, adn will make it worth your wild
Spelling
you andrew comes equiped with teh latest adn state of the art spelling abilities. but it has never been turned adn has so many faults it pointless to even try. he dosent aany more so that falls in teh catagorie of sound it out.
Music
four basic rules
1 ska makes him happy
2 Jaz makes him horney
3 techno makes him dance (so do all the above and below)
4 Ragge maked him andrew
Washing
wahs yyou r andrew in a mild and hydrating solution in warm water do NOT Iron or tumbel dry (though he thinks it might be fun) and towel him off the apply teh lotion to its skin.
Alargies
their is a minimal chance that you will be alergic to yor andrew, but he is alergic to Tree nuts, your nuts, and dogs. he may have what seems to be an alergic reaction to assholes and ignornt people but that is just his natuer so don't panic.
Drinks
mot always will your andrew drink, he usualy does it in small reasonabel amounts.
Vodka: always a favorits and a great social drink likes the shots but not the cheep shit hint hint VOX
Grand Ma (the top shelf orange lociquor) the shot is the only way to consume this drink, but not for the week of stomach or heart, 5 to 6 shots is the max. but consume it carefully, it can kick your ass.
Beer- no thanks
Taquila is an absolute no, it makes me violent adn not a good violent
books/movies
loves to read and watch movies, is a whore for sci-fi and horror, as well as camp and anything good. sundance adn out their are good things. love to read philosiphy and relegious materials.
well thats the basic outline of teh pamphlet thati need to hand out to all the guys i date so besides the need for an amazing editor any more suggestions on chapters or ideas?
below is an anotitated table of contents
behavioral pattern:
andrew is a solitary creatuer adn feircly independent and not big into PDA. things burn hot for about the first 3 months then hit a cooling off period of a few weeks but do not panic he will be backand things will progress ona deep adn satisfying natuer. this behavior will happen ocasionaly but the next planed period od mantinace that results in this behavior is at teh 2 year mark.
Feeding
food on a re3gular ocasion is a good thing adn do not forget the watter. or Grand Ma or Vodka they all lead to a long adn happy life of your andrew.
mood of conversation
they range from teh mundane to the esotaric, gt him inthe right mood and he will not shut up or put him in front of a bunch of people adn the chatter wiill begin, but other wise he is a quiet adn contomplative personthatthinks befor he speeks.
friends
andrew's are fiercly loyal to their friends so don't piss them off cause you wil not get any warnign signs, its 0 to 180 and he is not a nice person when he is mad or pissed off.
Family
do not under any circumstance mmake any situation that results in him deciding between you and his family. you will ALWAYS loose, unless plans have been made before hand then it will be a great deal of compromising to make both parties happy. these situations do not happen very often or with any regularity, but if they do just stay calm and your andrew will make it up to you and be much more greatful for your understanding, adn will make it worth your wild
Spelling
you andrew comes equiped with teh latest adn state of the art spelling abilities. but it has never been turned adn has so many faults it pointless to even try. he dosent aany more so that falls in teh catagorie of sound it out.
Music
four basic rules
1 ska makes him happy
2 Jaz makes him horney
3 techno makes him dance (so do all the above and below)
4 Ragge maked him andrew
Washing
wahs yyou r andrew in a mild and hydrating solution in warm water do NOT Iron or tumbel dry (though he thinks it might be fun) and towel him off the apply teh lotion to its skin.
Alargies
their is a minimal chance that you will be alergic to yor andrew, but he is alergic to Tree nuts, your nuts, and dogs. he may have what seems to be an alergic reaction to assholes and ignornt people but that is just his natuer so don't panic.
Drinks
mot always will your andrew drink, he usualy does it in small reasonabel amounts.
Vodka: always a favorits and a great social drink likes the shots but not the cheep shit hint hint VOX
Grand Ma (the top shelf orange lociquor) the shot is the only way to consume this drink, but not for the week of stomach or heart, 5 to 6 shots is the max. but consume it carefully, it can kick your ass.
Beer- no thanks
Taquila is an absolute no, it makes me violent adn not a good violent
books/movies
loves to read and watch movies, is a whore for sci-fi and horror, as well as camp and anything good. sundance adn out their are good things. love to read philosiphy and relegious materials.
well thats the basic outline of teh pamphlet thati need to hand out to all the guys i date so besides the need for an amazing editor any more suggestions on chapters or ideas?