REAL TALK

Sep 04, 2012 18:52

REAL TALK
Posted by Zisca Chisoni on April 19, 2012 at 12:55pm
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Hey LNF...
I thought I would vent a little on how I been feeling lately...
So I have been coming to terms with being the only LESBIAN, in my family.
It has it's up's and down's. I come from a religious and jamaican background.
Every now and then, I get reminded of my age 26. 27 next month (:
I never came out fully. for fear of abandonment. But they KNOW...
side note= I'm like the only one of my mothers daughters who didnt have a child when I was a teen. I applaud my family for being able to do them. and I do appreciate being an aunty. But it aint in me to have a baby, atleast i just aint feeling it right now or back then lol. I am working on myself finacially, spiritually the whole works!

Now tell me, if u can. is it right or wrong of me to feel unaccpeted in my own...
The next issue of mine. Is I was raised in church. I went every sunday until I ranaway to be on my own.
I'm older now so. I try to go to church on my own.
Truthfully there is no space for an OUT lady like myself. I do respect GOD. But I cant be who I am aroud them. God knows even in church. I will get that drifting eye> and all I notice is some womans curves. imagine that in CHURCH... Worst part... There is always some dude tryna holla and make me his wife... makes me SICK... I respect men. i just dont want to be with one.
I know I respect mothers alike. mostly because there JOB aint EASY.
Really though what do I do?
The chances of me having a kid to Save Face... Is slim... But I wouldnt mind adopting(:
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