I guess i've found it.
I guess i've found it. My relationship with John has surpassed my own expectations so much so it can be scary. Because we're so happy, i'm afriad what if one day, we're no longer happy? It used to be a 70-30 type of love (me-him), what we feel for each other now has long expanded past the pie. And it's surprising how he's the only one who can move me to tears when we bonk. I've read about it somewhere: about loving someone, and loving Love itself, and how the latter people need to re-evaluate their feelings. Trust me, i've thought about the instances when i'm so goddamn hard-up, so goddamn horny, and so goddamn steeped in self-pity for the long distance between us, i've come to the conclusion that it's not Love i love, but him i love. I don't think about my past dalliances anymore, at least not sexually like i used to, and for the many times Ad, Allan or Polo messaged, i act with such nonchalence to their double-laced requests, i'm sure they're offended. And just like how MT understands what goes through my heart when i look at John - it explodes with a surge of can't-explains.
Have you ever desired someone alot. Feeling like your body is capable of hours and hours and hours of love-making, yet still content just sitting around sipping ice-cold juice, holding hands, feeling like the whole world has turned black&white and the only things that are in techni-colour are the members of Family Guy on tv and us. Few nights ago, we were in bed and talking about the most random things when the topic of kids' names came into picture. He said he wants french names for them. and i said i'd like my little girls to have an R-name too; and little boys should have names starting with the 1st letter of their daddy's.
Gimme french names for girls starting with R.
uhmm.... (obviously thinking hard)
ok what about Rene.
that's a good one. cept' boys are called Rene more than girls. Just like Michel.
yuck. what about boys.
you mean J-names?
^^
I kinda like how things are now. He doesn't freak out anymore when we talk about houses, kids and rings above other things. And even though i'm dying to jump on the wagon, i'm just as clear as he is that anything can go wrong too. There is always the issue of freaking each other out sometimes but we're learning ^^
It is all very amazing and for the many years i've yearned and searched for a REAL partner whom i can feel more than lust for, i guess i've found it.
Have you ever desired someone alot. Feeling like your body is capable of hours and hours and hours of love-making, yet still content just sitting around sipping ice-cold juice, holding hands, feeling like the whole world has turned black&white and the only things that are in techni-colour are the members of Family Guy on tv and us. Few nights ago, we were in bed and talking about the most random things when the topic of kids' names came into picture. He said he wants french names for them. and i said i'd like my little girls to have an R-name too; and little boys should have names starting with the 1st letter of their daddy's.
Gimme french names for girls starting with R.
uhmm.... (obviously thinking hard)
ok what about Rene.
that's a good one. cept' boys are called Rene more than girls. Just like Michel.
yuck. what about boys.
you mean J-names?
^^
I kinda like how things are now. He doesn't freak out anymore when we talk about houses, kids and rings above other things. And even though i'm dying to jump on the wagon, i'm just as clear as he is that anything can go wrong too. There is always the issue of freaking each other out sometimes but we're learning ^^
It is all very amazing and for the many years i've yearned and searched for a REAL partner whom i can feel more than lust for, i guess i've found it.