Oh yeah... that whole transition thing.
These last couple of months haven't been good for my identity as a whole, I'm thinking. Haven't been exercising enough, haven't been eating right, and really all around haven't been feeling too good about myself in any physical manner. It's a pain in the ass seeing yourself in the mirror every morning and half-panicking.
So, I've just been trying to sort through the rest of the mess, and I put physicality issues on the back burner... and it's showed. *sigh* It's hard for me to try to get worked up about fitness when I'm coming down with some kind of headcold and staring at thirty thousand comics that aren't going to inventory themselves, all the while wondering how we're gonna pay bills this month. Pretty unfun stuff.
Tomorrow is the loan fair, and I'm more than a little nervous. I've been really lazy about shaving this whole week, so I pretty much look like a college english professor. The one thing I've been keeping up on (with the help of my lovely and talented Jessica) is to keep my hair braided, which looks worlds better than my normal wacky hair; but tomorrow it'll just be in a ponytail while I try to convince a gaggle of bankers that I know precisely what I'm doing with their money. Then, I'm barrelling back home, shaving, dying my hair, and rolling up to Jessica's to get my hair rebraided before I swing by Cory's and play some of the Steel Battalion.
Oh yeah, forgot to mention. I FINALLY GOT THAT DAMN GAME. One hundred and fifty bucks later, I'm sitting on the hottest game ever, its sequel, and a two-joystick, three-footpedal beast of a controller. And Halo 2, which makes me question the sanity of my more fratboyish Halo-nerd friends.
I've also gotten a hair straightener, which definitely helps with the whole not-looking-like-a-pro-wrestler thing I've been working on as of late... really though, unless I get into really good shape it's not going to make the difference it needs to make. I also need to keep writing in this damn thing, it's good for my sanity and keeps me from wanting to run over pedestrians quite so often.
I'm trying to decide if I'm more terrified of being told there's no chance in Hell I'll get a loan, or suddenly being handed twenty-five large on good faith suddenly needing to scramble together a business. Impromptu real estate shopping, liquidating assets and scrambling for private investors, rush orders for (even more) inventory... I could do without that this week, but I may not get a choice. Slim as the chances are of such a thing happening, it would not be unprecedented, and I'd be a fool to turn it down. What I'm hoping for is some optimisting meetings with banking establishments, and scheduling some secondary reviews and discussions. I just hope something happens, and I don't find myself driving in tomorrow's icy shitstorm, with a headcold, only to be told I'm a silly goose and sent home like a good girl.
Special Thanks to Liz for backing me up and making me seriously contemplate socializing again.
Well that'll do me for now, I've got to get back to staring in notebooks and typing up spreadsheets. Wee! ♥
So, I've just been trying to sort through the rest of the mess, and I put physicality issues on the back burner... and it's showed. *sigh* It's hard for me to try to get worked up about fitness when I'm coming down with some kind of headcold and staring at thirty thousand comics that aren't going to inventory themselves, all the while wondering how we're gonna pay bills this month. Pretty unfun stuff.
Tomorrow is the loan fair, and I'm more than a little nervous. I've been really lazy about shaving this whole week, so I pretty much look like a college english professor. The one thing I've been keeping up on (with the help of my lovely and talented Jessica) is to keep my hair braided, which looks worlds better than my normal wacky hair; but tomorrow it'll just be in a ponytail while I try to convince a gaggle of bankers that I know precisely what I'm doing with their money. Then, I'm barrelling back home, shaving, dying my hair, and rolling up to Jessica's to get my hair rebraided before I swing by Cory's and play some of the Steel Battalion.
Oh yeah, forgot to mention. I FINALLY GOT THAT DAMN GAME. One hundred and fifty bucks later, I'm sitting on the hottest game ever, its sequel, and a two-joystick, three-footpedal beast of a controller. And Halo 2, which makes me question the sanity of my more fratboyish Halo-nerd friends.
I've also gotten a hair straightener, which definitely helps with the whole not-looking-like-a-pro-wrestler thing I've been working on as of late... really though, unless I get into really good shape it's not going to make the difference it needs to make. I also need to keep writing in this damn thing, it's good for my sanity and keeps me from wanting to run over pedestrians quite so often.
I'm trying to decide if I'm more terrified of being told there's no chance in Hell I'll get a loan, or suddenly being handed twenty-five large on good faith suddenly needing to scramble together a business. Impromptu real estate shopping, liquidating assets and scrambling for private investors, rush orders for (even more) inventory... I could do without that this week, but I may not get a choice. Slim as the chances are of such a thing happening, it would not be unprecedented, and I'd be a fool to turn it down. What I'm hoping for is some optimisting meetings with banking establishments, and scheduling some secondary reviews and discussions. I just hope something happens, and I don't find myself driving in tomorrow's icy shitstorm, with a headcold, only to be told I'm a silly goose and sent home like a good girl.
Special Thanks to Liz for backing me up and making me seriously contemplate socializing again.
Well that'll do me for now, I've got to get back to staring in notebooks and typing up spreadsheets. Wee! ♥