can i get a slow clap?
some day, not today, but some day, i'd like to start a slow clap. you know in movies, when there's a pinnacle moment and then someone just starts clapping slowly. *one clap* *another clap* *couple more people start clapping slowly* *thunderous applause*
the problem with the slow clap, is in real life you're rarely granted with the perfect opportunity. when things really move a crowd, they all applaud at once, giving you no chance to do the single clap that would officially initiate the slow clap. no, i'm going to need a big moving speech. to a lynch mob ready to kill and torture a rapist until one single person steps forth and exclaims: "STOP!" *a hush falls over the crowd* This is a man! A human being just like you and me! sure, he has his shortcomings much like any of us, but who are we to judge? You need to look deep inside your heart and see that to kill him makes you no healthier, no wiser, no better. It will take you to the same level as the man who felt you up in the fitting room! and THAT'S the real crime here! And we should ALL be ashamed of it!" *long pause* *slow clap starts*
The best slow claps though, are the ones where everyone is sitting, like at a football game where the lead quarterback who's mother died in a tragic accident at birth takes a bad hit and they're worried he'll be forever unconscious. "JOHNNY!" his girlfriend shouts, as her friends hold onto her in the stands, waiting to see if he'll wake up. Suddenly Johnny sits up, he's ok, but the audience is still silent, shocked at his courage. One brave fan, one fan with the courage for hundreds, still sits in his seat and claps. just once. and then again, then slowly starts to stand and claps quicker with the slow clap of a couple more people beginning to stand around him. finally, the entire stadium is a cacophany of applause! all for Johnny's courage to stand up once more, despite his mother being dead!
yes.... that is my dream.
the problem with the slow clap, is in real life you're rarely granted with the perfect opportunity. when things really move a crowd, they all applaud at once, giving you no chance to do the single clap that would officially initiate the slow clap. no, i'm going to need a big moving speech. to a lynch mob ready to kill and torture a rapist until one single person steps forth and exclaims: "STOP!" *a hush falls over the crowd* This is a man! A human being just like you and me! sure, he has his shortcomings much like any of us, but who are we to judge? You need to look deep inside your heart and see that to kill him makes you no healthier, no wiser, no better. It will take you to the same level as the man who felt you up in the fitting room! and THAT'S the real crime here! And we should ALL be ashamed of it!" *long pause* *slow clap starts*
The best slow claps though, are the ones where everyone is sitting, like at a football game where the lead quarterback who's mother died in a tragic accident at birth takes a bad hit and they're worried he'll be forever unconscious. "JOHNNY!" his girlfriend shouts, as her friends hold onto her in the stands, waiting to see if he'll wake up. Suddenly Johnny sits up, he's ok, but the audience is still silent, shocked at his courage. One brave fan, one fan with the courage for hundreds, still sits in his seat and claps. just once. and then again, then slowly starts to stand and claps quicker with the slow clap of a couple more people beginning to stand around him. finally, the entire stadium is a cacophany of applause! all for Johnny's courage to stand up once more, despite his mother being dead!
yes.... that is my dream.