insecurity
i want to go out tonight. I know where I want to go, I know who I'd like to go with, but I have this thing that I don't want to call people to hang out because I fear they don't want to really hang out with me. When it's people like Martina or someone I see all the time, obviously it's not so hard. But with certain people it's like, "don't ask them to hang out. You don't see her/him enough and they don't really want to hang out. Even though when I do see them they say, "YOU NEED TO CALL ME!! BLAAAAAAAARGEN!" But sometimes I think it's that whole thing people do when they say, "ya, we so need to hang out!" but they don't really mean it. And I don't get why people say that, because then when the person calls, they look at the caller ID with a grimace. And I always fear that I'll be the name on the caller ID receiving the grimace. lol it's ridiculous, especially since, once I get there, I find that I needlessly worried. Then the next time I want to make that call, once again I have to amp myself up.
So usually I force myself. I give myself a quick, internal pep talk saying "they want to hear from me, otherwise they wouldn't have asked. And if they don't want to hear from me, they can suck it." I have a lot of insecurities, but that's THE most annoying one.
Yomarie's out of the office at her daughter's graduation, but her computer's playing some great bachata and merengue. now i want to dance. let's all dance. move out the chairs, i'm gonna need some room to break it down.
So usually I force myself. I give myself a quick, internal pep talk saying "they want to hear from me, otherwise they wouldn't have asked. And if they don't want to hear from me, they can suck it." I have a lot of insecurities, but that's THE most annoying one.
Yomarie's out of the office at her daughter's graduation, but her computer's playing some great bachata and merengue. now i want to dance. let's all dance. move out the chairs, i'm gonna need some room to break it down.