Fic: Red Ribbon, White Lies Evan/Cam, PG-13
Title: Red Ribbon, White Lies
Author: Rubygirl29
Pairing: Cam/Evan
Rating: PG13
AU: Breakaway
Disclaimer: I don't own them, but I love them.
Words: 8,700
Summary: When Cam is injured ... again. Evan returns to Earth. Meeting Cam's parents at the hospital seems to be SOP, for him. The time has come for Wendy and Frank Mitchell to learn the truth about their relationship, but Even never intended it to be like this ...
Author's Note following the story.
Also archived on AO3 My Page
Red Ribbon/White Lies
Evan Lorne barged through the ER doors, waving his pass at the security guard and the receptionist at the desk. "I'm looking for Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell," he said, trying not to sound as desperate as he felt.
"Let me see if he can have visitors," she said, her eyes on her monitor. "I'm sorry, sir. But the orders are family only."
Lorne's heart dropped. Cam was his best friend, his lover. He was closer to Cam than any other person on Earth. But according to law he had no rights in this place. He drew in a breath to steady himself. "Is his family here?"
"They're on their way," she said.
"Listen, I'm the closest thing he has to family until they get here. He's my best friend. He shouldn't be alone. He's like a brother to me." It was a whopper of a lie. Cam was anything but a brother, however Evan wasn't taking any chances on this. "Please, ma'am. I've been out of the country for the last six months." That was an even bigger whopper, but he couldn't very well say he had been in another galaxy. Of course, now the Atlantis expedition had been kicked out of the city by a bunch of snotty Ancients and ordered to return to Earth, he wasn't so far away anymore.
She looked at him, seeing the shadows under his eyes, his concern, his fear. "I'll ask the doctors. Have a seat, Major."
He did. And waited. The linoleum on the floor was old, with a dizzying pattern of multi-colored swirls. His phone buzzed and he looked at the display. "Hey, John."
How's Cam?
"I don't know. They won't let me in to see him."
That's sucks.
"Tell me. After what happened to us, this is like getting kicked in the gut when you're already down."
You want me to come over?
"Cam's folks are on the way."
That should be fun.
The nurse at the desk was waving him over. "I've got to go. I think they're going to let me in to see Cam."
Good. You take care of him, and yourself. I don't have so many friends that I can afford to lose you two.
Evan thumbed off and went over to the desk. "Well?"
"You can go back, sir. Treatment area 122."
"Thank you!" Evan could have kissed her and she looked like she wished he would. She'd have to settle for his sincere gratitude. His kisses were taken. He hurried to Cam's room. That he had been admitted to the base hospital, not confined to the infirmary at Cheyenne Mountain, was a concern, but it also meant that his injuries were treatable by normal medical procedures and not dependent on alien technologies to heal him. So, things were bad, but not life-threatening.
He pushed aside the curtain and paused. Cam looked so bled out, so bruised, so Goddamned fragile that Evan's breath stopped. He was sleeping or unconscious, hooked up to monitors that were blessedly stable. Judging from the bags of blood and fluids hanging on the IV poles, Cam had lost too much blood. One wrist was in a cast. Evan didn't want to think what else was hidden beneath the blankets on the bed.
Cam's chart was in a holder on the wall and Evan took it out. His sister was a doctor, so some of the terminology was familiar to him. Blunt force trauma to his liver and spleen, broken ribs, a burn on his left side, hairline fracture of his wrist, concussion, contusions ... the list seemed endless. He still didn't know what had happened, but he was getting some ugly vibes that it hadn't been an accident.
He pulled a chair up to the side of the bed and kissed Cam's hand. His skin was hot and dry. Add fever to the list; probably an infection of some kind. "You are in some sorry shape, Babe," Lorne sighed. He brushed his hand over Cam's short, rough hair. His thumb caressed Cam's forehead, smoothing out the furrowed line of pain over his right brow. "But I'm here, at least until your folks make it in from Kansas, so you're not alone." He sat back in the chair, still holding Cam's hand. It was going to be a long night.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Evan was awakened by voices outside the curtain. Feeling muzzy from sleep, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He heard Frank and Wendy Mitchell, and a man's voice he assumed was one of Cam's doctors. He started to push away from the bed, but Cam's grip tightened on his.
"Don't leave," he rasped.
"Hey, flyboy," Evan smiled. "How are you doing?"
"They gave me the good drugs. I don't feel much of anything but thirsty."
Evan hadn't seen any NPO orders, and there was a carafe of water next to the bed. He poured some into a glass and slid his arm behind Cam, supporting him while he sipped. Cam's hand came up and wrapped around his wrist. "Promise you'll stay."
"Cam ..." he sighed, thinking of all the problems his presence could raise. He couldn't resist the plea in Cam's blue eyes. "I'll stay," he promised. "But your folks are outside."
Cam gave a ghost of a laugh. "Great. Every time they see you, I'm in the hospital. We've got to stop meeting like this."
"Yeah, it's getting old." Evan bent to kiss Cam. "Be good."
"Baby, I'm always good." Not so convincing when he was flat on his back looking like he'd gone ten rounds with a UFC champion.
The curtain slid aside while Evan was still holding Cam. Awkward, but not impossible to explain away, since he also still had the glass of water in his hand. Wendy came in first, followed by Frank. For all they noticed him, Evan might as well have been invisible. He backed away, leaving the bedside clear for Cam's parents, feeling like an interloper and wondering if he should slip outside. The entry was blocked by Frank Mitchell and the doctor, so he was stuck there.
"Cameron, what have you done this time?" Wendy kissed him.
"Ran into a bad driver."
"Do the police have him in custody?" Frank asked as his sharp eyes assessed Cam's condition. Before Cam could even think of answering came the important question, "How are you, son?"
"A little banged-up, but I'll be okay. Mom, Dad, you remember -- "
He was cut off by the entrance of the doctor. He came in and took Cam's vital signs, scribbling on his chart before remarking, "Better. Much better. We'll be moving you into a room shortly."
"Good. The decor in this place sucks."
"Cameron!" Wendy choked back a laugh of relief, hiding it behind reproof.
Cam tried again, "Mom, Dad, you remember Evan?" He held out his hand. Evan pretended he didn't see the gesture, but he did step out of the corner.
"Yes, of course. Major Lorne, it's good to see you again."
"Evan, ma'am. I'm sorry it has to be in the hospital."
"That seems to happen too often," Cam's dad said, and Evan wondered if he had noticed Cam extending his hand to him.
"You know I am here," Cam muttered. "And folks, there is a reason why Evan is always here when I need him --"
"Cam --" Evan warned quietly, concerned that it was the drugs talking and not reason.
"Cam, dear. Of course, we understand. You need a friend with you."
Cam moved restlessly, and Evan put a hand on his shoulder. "Easy, Cam. We're all good here, right?" he soothed, hoping Cam could read his mind.
"Yeah, sure."
Evan would have told him to quit sulking if he didn't suddenly look so worn out and pathetic. He touched Cam's shoulder again. "Hey, listen. I'm beat. I'm going to get some coffee and some food. You have a visit with your folks and I'll see you later, okay?"
"Not too late," Cam suggested.
"No. Not too late." He nodded to Cam's parents and left, hoping that Cam would keep quiet about their relationship. They had talked about this the last time Evan had been at SGC, then Atlantis had happened and the Daedalus. He still didn't know what his next assignment would be. Back to space, or on a Gate team. This thing with Cam was lousy timing. It wasn't that he was a coward about admitting his homosexuality; he was long past that. He just didn't want Cam to be hurt, and he didn't want their careers to suffer because of it. The military, inching at a glacial pace to abolish DADT, wasn't a forgiving institution. Cam's dad was all about the military. He glowed with pride when he talked about Cam. Wendy Mitchell did, too. She was always talking about how handsome Cam was in his uniform, and how the girls were all crazy for him, and how one of these days he'd find the right one and settle down.
There were times when Evan wanted to grab Cam and kiss him right in front of his folks, and other times, when he wanted to put his head down and cry. Mostly, he was fighting anger. Anger that Cam hadn't told his folks, anger that he felt he had to hide his feelings, anger that they couldn't be together. The walls seemed to close in on him. He had to get out of here ...
He went to the gym and worked out until sweat poured from his body, until his muscles ached. Then he pushed himself some more until he sank down to the floor, his hands curled loosely on his knees, his chest heaving, and sweat running down his face.
"Beating yourself up isn't going to make Cam better," John crouched in front of him. Then he realized that something had happened to drive Lorne to this ... this punishment. He gripped Evan's arms. "God, please tell me it's not Cam. Is he all right? Has something happened?"
"Cam's fine. His folks are there. I just had to get out for a while. I had to do something. You know how it is."
"Yeah, I know," John said softly. "Here. You need this."
Lorne took a deep drink of of the water John pressed into his hand before he continued. "Cam hasn't ... he won't tell his folks about us. About the way he is. It makes me feel like shit." He was being honest for the first time about himself, about his feelings. He took another swallow. "Like we're nothing compared to his family. It's just hard."
"God, I'm sorry, Evan. How much of this has to do with ... you know, the military?" John lowered his voice even though they were alone in the gym.
"Not as much as I wish it were," Evan said. "We've talked about DADT. His family is an entirely different matter. He nearly told his folks today, but between the drugs and how crummy he felt, I couldn't let him do it. So, why am I angry?"
John sat next to him. "Because you're afraid he won't tell them when he's better. You're one of the lucky ones. Your family is awesome. To be accepted and encouraged and loved, that's special."
"I know. Believe me, I know. That's part of the problem. My problem."
"I can't help you with this one. You have to talk to Cam."
"I love him, John."
"I figured that out." He stood up. "If you feel like talking, sparring, anything, you know where to find me."
"Thanks." He winced as John pulled him to his feet. "It helps." He was more grateful than he could say that John was able to put aside their professional relationship and go back to the days when he, Cam, and Evan were just friends sharing a house and on the verge of a huge adventure.
He hadn't felt young then, and he felt even older now. Or maybe he just wanted to know that he had a safe haven; somebody who understood him, and who needed him as much as he needed them. He wanted that person to be Cam. He wanted it so much that it hurt.
He showered, nabbed a bed in the BOQ for a nap, and woke up three hours later, feeling sore, but rested. He took two ibuprofen, did some stretches to work out the knots, and went back to the hospital. He was calmer now, more rational without the stress of waiting in the ER for hours and post-mission jangling nerves. He went into Cam's room, not knowing what to expect.
What he didn't expect was the overwhelming wave of love he felt when he looked at him. Cam's perfect mouth was lightly closed, his lashes sweet and soft on his cheeks. He looked heartbreaking. Evan was lost. He took Cam's lax hand in his and kissed him.
Cam's eyes opened, and Evan felt his smile. "Who am I? Sleeping Beauty?"
"Does that make me Prince Charming?"
"If the shoe fits ..."
"Different fairy tale. Where are your folks?"
"I sent them to get dinner. I love my mom but I can only take so much of 'my poor baby' before I bury my head under the pillow."
Evan smiled. "She's a mom. She loves you. So does your dad."
"My dad ..." Cam sighed. "I love my dad."
"I know." His thumbs moved over Cam's knuckles. "I understand. I do, but I love you, too."
Cam's hand curved over his cheek, slid to the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss him. "I love you, Ev, but why did you stop me earlier?"
Evan's eyes opened wide. "You remember?"
"Yeah, why wouldn't I?"
"I thought it was the drugs talking. I didn't want you to say something you'd regret once the fog cleared."
"The fog has cleared. But now that I think about it, can we wait until I'm out of here? A military hospital isn't the best place in the world to come out in public."
"You got that right. I'm risking enough every time I look at you."
"Don't stop looking at me," Cam teased.
"I never will. I will, however, let you get your rest. I need to sleep, and so do you. See you in the morning." He risked one quick, sweet kiss before he backed away and slid the curtain back in place. He turned to find himself nearly nose to nose with Frank Mitchell.
For a moment, he panicked. Had they seen anything? Heard anything? He did a quick threat assessment, because that was what he had been trained to do. No, they were relaxed, smiling, if a bit startled at his sudden appearance. "Ah, hi." Smooth, Evan. Real smooth,
"Major."
"Evan, please. Um, I was just saying goodnight. Cam's still awake, though."
"Goodnight, Evan," Wendy said. She patted his arm. "Thank you for taking care of Cam."
"No problem. He's ... he's a good friend." God, how lame was that?
"You look like you could use some rest, Major," Frank said. Still not sure enough of him to call him by his first name, but there was a thaw from this morning. That wouldn't last once Cam revealed the truth. Frank would always love Cam, but could he accept him? Evan didn't want to consider the possibilities. He already had a headache.
"Yes, sir." He inclined his head out of respect and started down the hall. He heard Wendy say to her husband, "He's such a nice boy."
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The next morning, his gate team was called away on a mission that turned out to be longer and more complicated than he had expected. When they returned, three days later, SGC was in a state of controlled panic. Called to Landry's office immediately, he was too sweaty, dirty and unshaven when he faced the General.
"Major, your former CO has taken it upon himself to return to the Pegasus galaxy to save Atlantis from the replicators, along with Dr. Weir, Dr. Beckett and Rodney McKay -- against orders, I might add. Tell me you had no idea that he might try to do that?"
"I had no idea, sir," he replied dutifully. "Replicators in Atlantis? What happened to the Ancients? Aren't General O'Neill and Mr. Woolsey there?"
Landry's anger faded. "I doubt they are still alive."
"Sir, I wouldn't bet against the Colonel. If the General and Mr. Woolsey are alive, Colonel Sheppard will get them back and take care of the replicators," Lorne was trying to answer the general's questions, but what he really wanted was to get in a jumper and join Sheppard and the others. Atlantis was his home ... anybody with the ATA gene felt a connection, and his was nearly as strong as John's.
"You sound certain of that."
"I know the Colonel, sir. I know the city."
Landry saw behind Evan's implied plea. "You are not joining them, Major. Get cleaned up. Until we know for sure what's happening, you're staying on Earth."
Lorne's heart sank. "Yes, sir." He left feeling angry and helpless, which was how he had felt when he had left three days ago. He called the base hospital at Peterson to ask about Cam and was told he had been released. That was all the information they could give to him. Of course it was, because in this world, he counted for nothing.
Feeling like crap, and not only due to the grime and fatigue, he took a quick shower, shaved and borrowed a jeep to drive over to Peterson. He went up to Cam's room and found Cam, dressed jeans and a sweater, his boot laces trailing on the floor. He looked pale and frustrated. When he saw Evan he said, "You are the answer to my prayers." He grinned, sending Evan's heart into overdrive. "How was the mission?"
"How did you know where I was?" Evan went to the bedside. He didn't touch Cam, didn't trust that some nurse or doctor wouldn't come in at a bad moment. Cam made the move Evan wouldn't.
He took Evan's hand and kissed his palm. "A little piece of technology called a telephone. Sam told me." "You look exhausted."
"I'm fine. Are you being discharged?'
"As soon as I get my boots on. The only problem is I can't get my boots on without my ribs screaming in pain when I lean over to tie them."
"You just want me on my knees." Evan's blue eyes glinted wickedly.
Cam groaned. "Just tie the boots so we can get out of here."
"You aren't breaking out of here against medical advice?" Lorne asked, knowing Cam well enough to think that could be a possibility.
"No! I've go my discharge papers right here." He patted his pocket. "You are suspicious."
"Blame it on Sheppard."
"Right." He was silent as Evan tied his boots. "Let's get out of here. I should warn you that my folks are still in town."
"At your place?"
"No!" Cam looked appalled. "Landry set them up in a very nice condo of their own, thank God." He stood up, winced as he straightened. He held out a hand when Evan made a move to support him. "Just take it slow. I'll be fine after the kinks get stretched out. Don't say it, Ev."
"Me? Never. Well, maybe not never, just not tonight." Cam's discharge orders arrived and Evan drove him home in the growing twilight.
There were lights on in Cam's condo, and the aroma of roasting meat and potatoes wafted out when Evan opened the door. Cam sighed and called out, "Mom?" The more quietly. "I did not see this one coming. Sorry."
"I won't turn my nose up at a home-cooked meal."
Wendy came into the living room, dusting flour off her hands. "Cam," she scolded. "What are you doing here? You were supposed to wait for us." She took her cell phone out of her pocket. "Call your father and tell him to come home. If I had known Major Lorne was going to pick you up, I wouldn't have sent him to get you."
"Umm, it would have been nice if you had kept me in the loop. Dad will love knowing he made that trip for nothing." He made the call, dutifully apologetic, and sat on the sofa. His head tipped back against the cushions. "As always, a snafu."
"Hopefully, not a FUBAR," Evan joked. "Are you okay for dinner?"
"I'd better be. I'll just sit here for a while. Join me?"
Frank Mitchell was not happy to have driven through rush hour traffic for no reason ... twice. Given his handicap, Evan could sympathize. Dinner was awkward. Wendy tended to flutter when she was upset which didn't improve Frank's mood. Cam was looking more pale and tired by the minute. Evan was caught between them, not wanting to upset Cam's parents, but also trying to protect Cam; exhausted himself, longing to get into bed and curl up against the warmth of Cam's body. He wanted the night to end.
When the last dish was cleared, Evan stood up. "Mrs. Mitchell, the dinner was delicious. Thank you both very much. But Cam should go to bed."
"I'm fine," Cam protested, subsiding when Evan glared at him.
Wendy looked doubtful. "Cam, do you want me to stay tonight?"
"No!" Cam and Evan replied in unison, startling both of the Mitchells into silence. "I'll stay," Evan said evenly. "He'll be fine."
"You don't have to do that, Major."
"Dad ... I want Evan to stay."
Not prefer, not need, but want. Evan looked at Cam. Push had come to shove. Evan held out his hand. Cam took it, right there, right in front of his parents. "I have a box full of medals for bravery up in my room, but I've been a coward about one part of my life. I want Evan to stay, because I love him. We've been together for a while now. I don't know if you can understand this, but I want you to love Evan, too."
Silence. Frank and Wendy looked shell-shocked. Cam looked close to breaking down. Evan backed away. "Umm, I'll just ... get some fresh air. Cam, you need to be with your folks right now. I won't be far." He beat a retreat out the back door to the deck and sank down on the steps. This was not how he had wanted Cam to come out to his folks, but beggars couldn't be choosers. He had nothing else to say in the matter. It was up to Cam. His presence inside would only fan the emotional flames.
He heard the door slide open. "Have they left?"
"Yeah." Cam sat beside Evan and pulled his head down on his shoulder. "My mom looked like I had told her I had cancer, and my dad looked at me like I was a stranger who had hurt him for no reason. I never thought it would be so hard."
"Maybe we should have waited, kept up the pretense. I pushed you --"
"You didn't." Cam sighed. "I was tired of lying to them. Tired of hiding and pretending. Telling them has to be better than having them walk in on us in a lip-lock."
Evan laughed. "Okay. That would be massively awkward. It will get better, Cam. Your folks love you. It will all come down to that."
"I'm tired. Let's go to bed."
"Are you sure you want me there tonight?"
"I'm sure."
They went inside. By the time Evan came out of the bathroom, Cam was deeply asleep, one arm outstretched as if inviting him to fill the space. Evan slid under the covers and Cam's arm wrapped around his shoulder, drawing him close. Evan settled there, half asleep before his head hit the pillow. Cam murmured in his sleep. The only word that mattered was love.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Evan woke up early feeling far too warm for the temperature Cam usually kept his bedroom. Cam had tossed off his covers, was moving restlessly. When Evan touched his face, the skin was burning hot. That got him upright fast. He was on the phone to the 911 as he pulled on his jeans. Cam was too incoherent for Evan to get him into a car and drive him to the hospital.
When the paramedics arrived, Evan used Cam's phone to call the Mitchells. Nothing about this was easy. He gave Frank a terse account of what had happened; and he supposed they wondered how exactly he had discovered Cam was ill. He wasn't about to tell them. He hung up, ran to his jeep, and drove as quickly as the law allowed to the hospital.
By the time he got there, Cam was in the treatment area. Frank and Wendy hadn't arrived yet, and feeling a bit guilty, Evan took advantage of their absence. "Can I go back?" he asked. The attendant, recognizing him from the day before, opened the door for him.
Cam was awake, but still groggy. "Hey," he murmured. "Didn't expect to wake up here."
"I know. You scared the daylights out of me, spiking a fever like that." He rested his palm on Cam's forehead. "You're still hot."
"Literally or figuratively?"
"To me, both." He bent and kissed his forehead. "I feel like this is my fault."
"How do you figure that?"
"A little too much emotion and stress with your folks?"
"Don't. I have an infection. I'm on antibiotics. I'll be fine."
He didn't look it. Too pale, with shadows beneath his eyes and a draw of pain to his mouth that Evan hated to see. "You should rest," he said. He started to get up, but Cam caught his hand.
"Stay. I sleep better when you're here."
"Now that's just not fair," Evan sat down and held his hand. "Okay. Close your eyes."
"Okay."
Ten seconds later, he was out. Five minutes later, Cam's parents opened the door. Evan didn't bother letting go. He stayed where he was, Cam's fingers curled in his, his body turned slightly towards him. He wouldn't get defensive, not about this. For better or worse, the Mitchells would have to come to terms with their relationship.
Cam's mother came in first, her "poor baby" expression in her eyes. Evan released Cam's hand and let her sit next to him. Frank didn't even look at Evan; he went right to Cam. Evan, feeling like the third wheel and more than a little sick, left them to be a family.
He called Samantha Carter to ask if there had been any news on Atlantis. She either wouldn't say, or didn't know. Her voice gave him no clues. Selfishly, he wished John were here to talk to because he was in a cold and lonely place without Cam. His sister, for all her support, had her own young family to worry about. Talk to a priest? He didn't think so.
At a loss, he went to the cafeteria to get coffee, which he didn't need, and something to eat, which he did. The headache building behind his eyes was getting worse. He found a corner booth hidden behind a pillar and sat, chewing on a dry blueberry muffin and sipping bitter coffee. When he had finished, he rested his head against the hard cushions, just wanting to be alone, to be silent.
"Major ... Evan?" Wendy's voice made him sit up. "May I join you?"
Startled, but always polite, he nodded. "Yes, ma'am."
"I thought you'd like to know that the doctor said Cam will be fine. They're keeping him here for 24 hours of IV antibiotics, but then he should be able to go home."
"That's good news," Evan said, relief washing over him. He hadn't been aware of the depth of his worry until it was eased by Wendy's words. "Thank you."
"No, I should thank you for being there for Cameron. Not just last night, but for all the other times we couldn't be there for him. What you do, it's not easy, is it?"
"No, but we wouldn't have it any other way."
"He's so like his father." She gave him a wistful smile. "Do you take after your father?"
Evan shook his head. "I don't know. He died just before I started at the Air Force Academy. My mom never said I was like him, but she never said I wasn't, either. She said he would be proud of me."
"Did he know you were ... you know?" she asked.
"You can say it. It's not a curse." Evan's bitterness made her straighten her back in indignation. "Yes, he knew I'm gay. I told him when I was thirteen that I felt different. But he and my mom were artists. My godparents are a gay couple. It wasn't, it isn't, a stigma. It's just what I am, like I have blue eyes."
"We didn't know. He never talked about it. I feel like we let him down."
"No," Evan took her hand. "God, when Cam talks about you and your family, he lights up. He loves you a lot, Mrs. Mitchell."
"Why didn't he tell us?"
Evan's brow slanted. He held out his hands like the platens of a scale. "Kansas. San Francisco."
She smiled at him. "I understand, I think. It will take some time."
"And your husband?"
"Frank loves Cameron. He's so proud of him. Cam has been through so much. Frank sees this as an obstacle thrown in the path of his career. The military isn't particularly tolerant."
"Believe me, I know that. However, there have been gays in the military for centuries. Most western countries, our allies, allow gays to serve openly. We'll have to accept that eventually. Sooner rather than later, DADT will be repealed."
"Then you and Cam will ...?"
"Go on with our lives like we have been. We don't serve together, ma'am. He's not my commanding officer. I'm away most of the time. Cam isn't always here when I am. We'll get through it like every military family does."
"Family?"
"Cam is my family. This may be hard for you to hear, but I love him. I don't see that ever changing. I love him now, and I'll love him until we're both old and gray."
Wendy patted his hand. "Give us time, Maj --"
"I think you ought to call me Evan now that you know all my secrets."
"Evan, give us time."
"I would die for him, but I can't stop loving him."
To his embarrassment, Wendy's eyes filled with tears that spilled down her cheeks. He passed over his handkerchief. As he did, his phone vibrated against his thigh. He dug it out of his pocket and looked at the text. "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I have to get back to Cheyenne Mountain. I'd like to see Cam before I leave."
"Of course." She pushed away from the table. "I'll find something to occupy Frank."
Wendy dragged Frank from Cam's bedside with a firm hand and voice, telling him he needed something to eat or she would have two Mitchell men in the hospital. Evan nodded at Frank as he went inside and received a slight nod in return, which was better than a killing glare. Cam was still sleeping, and as much as Evan wanted to let him sleep, he couldn't leave for Atlantis without saying goodbye.
He kissed Cam awake. "Hey, I got a text from SGC. Sheppard, that lucky sonofabitch, regained control of Atlantis from the Replicators. We're going back!" He couldn't contain his emotion. "I have to report in an hour to return to Pegasus."
Cam gave him a rueful smile. "You love it, don't you?"
"I feel like I've been waiting to go back forever. The city sings to us. I feel it, hear it. It's where I belong right now."
"I'll miss you."
"It's not like I never make it back to Earth," Evan said. His fingers brushed lightly over the hair at Cam's temples. "You will always bring me back." He glanced at the curtains around the bed. They were closed, and he bent to kiss Cam, tasting his sweetness, feeling the shape of his lips; cool and perfect. Cam's breath sighed into Evan's mouth. "Promise me next time you won't be in the hospital."
Cam laughed softly. "Yeah. I'll make a note of that." He kissed Evan again. "Definitely."
"I love you."
"Love you, too." He stroked lightly over the back of Evan's hand. "My folks will, too. They just need time."
"So, time is on our side?"
"Time, patience, love. We can do this, Ev."
"We have to do it." One last kiss, brief and filled with passion and promise. He left, leaned against the wall of the ER and tried not to cry. He left the hospital quickly and drove to SGC. Two hours later, he was packed and stepping through the gate to the Midway Station.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Six months later, Evan was back on Earth and this time, it was his turn to be flat on his back in the base hospital, following a bout with a nasty Pegasus virus. Everybody else had recovered, but he suffered from headaches, intermittent fevers and general malaise. He had hidden it well until he collapsed ignominiously in the gym after sparring with Ronon. When Keller could find no reason for his illness, he was sent back to SGC for more diagnostic tests.
On his first visit, Cam had to wear a mask, gown and gloves. They couldn't touch, just speak through the muffling fabric. By the second visit, Evan was responding to an anti-viral serum developed during the Prior epidemic. It hadn't stopped the Prior virus, but it seemed to be effective against influenza and whatever virus he had been harboring in his bloodstream. When Cam came in, he was sitting up and eating blue Jell-O.
"Whoa," Cam laughed. "That looks like something that will give you a virus, not recover from one."
"I like it."
"So, you're still sick. I get it." Cam kissed his forehead. "You look terrible."
"I don't have a mirror."
"Just as well." Cam's fingers brushed down his stubbled cheek. "You need to shave. You also need to eat something more substantial than blue Jell-O."
"Is that an offer?"
"You bet."
"Dr. Lam said I could get out of here in a day or so as long as my blood tests come out clean. Here's hoping."
"I miss you."
Evan sighed. He set the Jell-O aside and sank down against the pillows. "I know. This is just insane, me in Atlantis, you here."
"Are you saying you want to give it up? That doesn't sound like you, Ev."
"No! It was just a general observation. I'm tired. That's all."
"Okay," Cam said slowly. "I need to get you out of here, take you someplace where you can rest up, have some home-cooking."
"I've had your cooking,"
"Are you dissing my culinary skills?"
"You can grill and open a jar of spaghetti sauce with the best of then."
Cam laughed, then sobered. "I was thinking about taking you to Kansas." His eyes were watching Evan's, blue and bright, hopeful and doubtful.
"Cam ... your folks aren't too keen on me. On us. Are you sure you want to put them on the spot like that?"
"I love my folks, Ev. But I'm in love with you. They've had me for the first part of m life, but you have me forever." He brushed Evan's hair from his forehead. "What do you say, flyboy?"
"I've never backed down from a fight. This would be a lousy time to start." Cam squeezed his hand. The look in his eyes sealed Evan's decision. He had faced the Wraith and survived. Kansas wasn't nearly as threatening.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Kansas wasn't as flat as he had expected. Cam's family farm was set amidst gently rolling fields and rich fields of wheat and corn. The house was old and sprawling, white frame siding and neat. A US flag fluttered in a light breeze and a bright yellow ribbon hung on the newel post. It was so damn American that it was almost a cliche.
"You okay?" Cam asked him.
"Yeah. Wasn't Clark Kent born here?" he asked, a little overcome by the postcard perfection of it all.
"No Superman, just me." He slid his fingers through Evan's hair, drew him close. "Nobody to see us but the cows, he said softly. His tongue teased Evan's lower lip and he sighed and opened to his lover. He didn't know if he'd have another chance like this for a while.
They parted, but the sweetness lingered. "Okay, let's do this."
"Relax, it's not like they're armed with P-90s."
They were armed with parental disapproval, Evan thought, which was just as deadly. However, when they drove up to the house, Frank and Wendy were opening the door, waiting. When Wendy saw him she held out her hands, taking his and pulling him inside. "Maj-Evan, welcome. Cam, what were you thinking to drag him all the way out here? He looks exhausted."
"Mom, there are such things as airplanes. I didn't make him walk," he bent to kiss her cheek. "But she's right, Ev."
"I'm fine," he argued. He was watching Cam's father out of the corner of his eye. He held out his hand to Frank, "Sir, thank you for letting me visit."
Frank Mitchell was too polite to refuse to shake his hand. "You're welcome, Major. Come in, get off your feet. Wendy is right, you look exhausted."
"I'm fine," Evan repeated and glared at Cam.
Cam, determined now to take the bull by the horns, put his arm around his waist. "Mom's right. I brought you here for some R&R." He guided him into the cool, dim family room and led him to a well-worn and comfortable sofa. "Legs up." He arranged a pillow behind Evan's back and leaned in to whisper, "Let mom fuss over you. She loves that." Evan felt a quick brush of his lips against his earlobe, and a touch of Cam's hand before he stepped back.
Evan was smart enough to know that if he won Wendy over, Frank would thaw as well. Over the next few days, he let her fuss over and feed him, was unfailingly polite, offered to help (refused, of course), and hadn't been so spoiled since ... he didn't remember when.
Late one evening, after the Mitchells had retired for the night, he and Cam were sitting together on the couch, Evan reclining against Cam's chest, Cam with his arms wrapped about him. Cam was smiling down as Evan related a story about a typical day on Atlantis. When the story was finished, Cam bent and kissed him. Before he could object or even think of objecting, he was lost, all his good intentions swept away by longing and need.
Neither of them heard Cam's mother as she came into the family room. "Oh!" She gasped. "I'm sorry ... I just came down to take the chicken for tomorrow out of the freezer and I saw the light ... I didn't mean to spy or interrupt ..."
Evan felt Cam's heartbeat quicken, but he remained still in Cam's arms, waiting for some sort of cue on what would happen next. Cam sighed. "Mom, would it bother you if you walked in on a kiss between me and a girlfriend?"
"Really, Cameron. This is different."
"No, it isn't. I'm in love with Evan. You know that. I'm sorry if you're shocked -- "
"I am not shocked, Cameron, or upset. I just need a moment." She sat down, looking at them, at Evan, tense and ready to bolt, and her son, steady and honest. She looked at Cam's hand resting on Evan's chest, and at the way their bodies were aligned. She smiled wistfully. "You really do love each other."
It wasn't a question. Cam smiled at Evan. "See? No worries."
"I wouldn't say that," Wendy sighed. "There is your father." She rose and came over to the couch. She kissed Cam, then startled Evan with a kiss on the cheek. "Don't stay up too late."
"No, ma'am."
"Don't forget the chicken, mom."
"Goodnight, boys."
Evan started to say something, but Cam hushed him. "Not tonight. Let's just be together."
Who was he to argue with that?
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The early morning sun was warm on his face, his bare arms. Evan tilted his head, enjoying the day. Cam was leading a new mare around the paddock, letting her get used to her new surroundings. His blue shirt was rolled to his elbows, his jeans clung to his long legs and were faded in all the right places. He looked at Evan and flashed that heart-stopping smile of his. Evan shaded his eyes and lifted his other hand in a thumbs up. Cam swept a bow and then led the mare into the barn.
"Major."
Evan steeled himself and turned to Cam's father. "Good morning, sir."
"So far."
"Does Cam know you're a glass half-empty kind of guy?" Evan asked tersely.
To his surprise, Frank Mitchell laughed. "I reckon I had that one coming."
Evan glanced towards the barn. "Sir, my CO says I can be kind of blunt, and I guess he's right. I like to get to the point. I don't have much patience when it comes to avoiding the truth, so I'm going to go ahead and be blunt. Cam is still your son, the same as he was before he met me. You can't make somebody gay. You can hate me for a lot of reasons, but not for turning Cam into somebody you don't know, because he is the same man you raised to be a hero, and he will be that forever no matter who he loves."
"Is that all?"
"That's it." Just then Cam came out of the barn.
"I'm starving. Let's see what mom made for breakfast." He put an arm around Evan's shoulders, gave his father a look that dared him to say anything, and guided Evan towards the house. They paused in the cool dark mudroom off the kitchen. "Is everything okay?" he asked as he toed off his boots.
"Oh, sure. You're father really hates me now."
"Why?
"For telling him it's not my fault you're gay. I don't think he believes me."
"You don't have to fight my battles, Evan."
"I know that, but I have to fight mine." He started to open the door to the kitchen. Cam caught his arm turned him and kissed him until Evan thought his bones would dissolve.
"Worth fighting for?" Cam asked.
"Worth it, totally." Evan leaned against him, reveling in Cam's hard muscles, the scent of soap, sweat and horse, his strength.
"You still feel thin. Let's get breakfast."
They sat at the table with the Mitchell's, conversation constrained by common knowledge. Wendy, watching them all with concern, Frank's gaze skating from Cam to Evan; seeing perhaps more than he should in the way their shoulders brushed, elbows touching, shared glances. It wasn't helping Evan's appetite to be under such close scrutiny. Of course, Wendy noticed.
"Evan, is everything all right? Can I get you anything?"
"Everything is fine, Mrs. Mitchell." He felt Cam stiffen and reflex made him reach over to touch his arm. "Really, Cam. Everything is fine."
Cam had reached his limit. He pushed his plate away. "Okay, folks. This isn't good for any of us, particularly Evan, so let's just talk it out before we get in the car and drive away. News flash, I'm gay. I've always been like this. Everything in my life has been influenced, for better or for worse, by it. I had to be the jock, the BMOC, the best pilot, the tough guy just to keep people from seeing what I was. Why do you think I left town? I had to get away." He swallowed hard. "Evan isn't my first boyfriend, but he will be my last. We're committed. We love each other like any other couple loves each other."
Frank Mitchell, looking a little queasy, asked. "What about your careers? What about DADT?"
"DADT isn't going to be around forever. Times are changing, people are changing. That objection isn't going to fly. Try another."
"What about children, Cam? You always wanted a family," Wendy said, her voice trembling a little bit as she looked at Evan.
"I'm going to have nieces and nephews galore if Cath and Mike keep going at it like bunnies. And ..." he paused to take Evan's hand. "That doesn't mean we won't have our own family one day. Right now, even if I were straight and in a relationship, I wouldn't have children. It's wouldn't be fair to them, and neither of us can afford the distraction. Next?"
"Are you sure this is forever?"
"Yes." Both Cam and Evan answered in one voice.
"I wasn't raised to condone this," Cam's father said. "It's hard to get over those hurdles."
"The Bible also says, 'Thou shalt not kill,' but I'm a soldier, and so is Evan. We've both taken lives. I've regretted killing, but I've never regretted falling in love with Evan. Accept that, accept me, accept us."
He stood up, still holding Evan's hand. "I have to check up on the feed order in town. Come with me?" He didn't give Evan a chance to answer before he tugged him towards the door. Once out in the driveway, he leaned against the truck rubbing his forehead. "I'm sorry."
"Tough morning," Evan said. He leaned in and kissed Cam, never minding that they were probably visible from the kitchen windows. "Thank you."
Cam's hands rested on his waist, and he straightened, then laid his head on Evan's shoulder. "Let's go home early."
"If that's what you want, we will." He soothed Cam and felt the tension slowly leave his body. "First, the feed store."
They got in the truck and drove into town. The computer had screwed up the order. By the time they got it straightened out and ran a few more errands, it was past noon. They went into the diner and ate lunch, then went back to the feed store and picked up the corrected order. Evan kept an eye on Cam; he had settled down and seemed his usual easy-going self, but he couldn't hide the small crinkle of worry at the corner of his eyes.
"Pull over," Evan said.
"Why? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, but just pull over."
Cam pulled off the road in the shade of a tree. A breeze came in through the open windows, ruffling Evan's sweat-damp hair. "Come here." He reached out and pulled Cam close for a proper kiss. He tasted like sweet tea and cherry pie. Evan stroked the hair at his temples with gentle fingers. He kissed him there, too, salt and sweat tingling on his lips. "None of this is easy," he sighed.
"And you thought our job was hard ..." Cam commented.
"Dodging physical bullets is easier than dodging emotional ones. I've known that most of my life."
Cam put the truck back into gear and pulled back on the road. "Well, let's dodge a few more and then head back home."
They drove up the long drive to the Mitchell house. They were nearly at the parking area when Cam hit the brakes. "Look!"
Evan took in the white house, the flag, the yellow ribbon. He blinked. Woven through the loops of bright yellow satin was a red streamer flying in the breeze; brave as the flag, hopeful as the ribbon. "Is that ... does that mean what I think it does?"
Before Cam could answer, his parents came out of the front door. Frank's arm was around Wendy, and they were both smiling; Wendy a little tremulously, Frank a little doubtfully, but smiling.
"I think we're okay," Cam said. "Somehow..."
They got out of the truck and walked up to the porch. "Nice ribbon," Evan said, his eyes on Cam's father. "Thank you."
"Like every other ribbon on your chest, you've earned it, son. You both have." He held out his hand to Evan. "I guess this is our way of saying welcome to the family."
Cam went over to his father, who awkwardly wrapped one arm around his shoulders. "Thanks, dad. I didn't mean to blindside you with this. That's my fault."
"It's nobody's fault. It's just the way we are." Frank sighed gustily. "I won't say this is easy, but I don't want this to stand between us. I love you, and I respect Major ... Evan. Nothing will change that. Understanding this whole thing -- that might take a while. Meanwhile, I never want you to think that you are unwelcome here, and if I act like an ass occasionally, that's just me being an ass. I'm as able to do that as any man."
Evan smiled, looked down at the toes of his boots. "I'll remember that, sir."
Cam drew a breath. "Can we go inside? Pop, I think the AC in the truck is on the fritz again. Evan and I will take a look at it after it cools off."
"Want to try a hand at fixing the gearshift on the tractor while you're at it?"
"That tractor needs to be retired to the tractor Hall of Fame."
"Nah, it's got years in it yet ..."
Wendy looked at Evan. "They'll go on like this for a while. Let's go inside and get some lemonade." She took his arm and gave it a squeeze. "Want to help?"
"Yes, ma'am." He smiled down at her. "You don't even have to ask." The went inside and listened to Cam and his father arguing amiably, laughing, arguing again. It sounded like home to Evan.
The End
Author's Note: This was a lot harder to write than I anticipated. I didn't want Cam's parents to be quite as accepting as they are in many fics, even my own, for this story; but I also didn't want them to be unlikeable. Even the best parents must have to struggle with their upbringing, their standards of morality, when a child comes out to them. I hope that I have shown that acceptance is an ongoing process for Cam's father, in particular. At the same time, I don't see his father as being a bigot, or blind to the pain Cam and Evan feel at his resistance to accept that Cam is gay and they are in a sexual relationship. Eventually, Frank will come to love Evan like a son, but as he says, "It might take a while."
Author: Rubygirl29
Pairing: Cam/Evan
Rating: PG13
AU: Breakaway
Disclaimer: I don't own them, but I love them.
Words: 8,700
Summary: When Cam is injured ... again. Evan returns to Earth. Meeting Cam's parents at the hospital seems to be SOP, for him. The time has come for Wendy and Frank Mitchell to learn the truth about their relationship, but Even never intended it to be like this ...
Author's Note following the story.
Also archived on AO3 My Page
Red Ribbon/White Lies
Evan Lorne barged through the ER doors, waving his pass at the security guard and the receptionist at the desk. "I'm looking for Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell," he said, trying not to sound as desperate as he felt.
"Let me see if he can have visitors," she said, her eyes on her monitor. "I'm sorry, sir. But the orders are family only."
Lorne's heart dropped. Cam was his best friend, his lover. He was closer to Cam than any other person on Earth. But according to law he had no rights in this place. He drew in a breath to steady himself. "Is his family here?"
"They're on their way," she said.
"Listen, I'm the closest thing he has to family until they get here. He's my best friend. He shouldn't be alone. He's like a brother to me." It was a whopper of a lie. Cam was anything but a brother, however Evan wasn't taking any chances on this. "Please, ma'am. I've been out of the country for the last six months." That was an even bigger whopper, but he couldn't very well say he had been in another galaxy. Of course, now the Atlantis expedition had been kicked out of the city by a bunch of snotty Ancients and ordered to return to Earth, he wasn't so far away anymore.
She looked at him, seeing the shadows under his eyes, his concern, his fear. "I'll ask the doctors. Have a seat, Major."
He did. And waited. The linoleum on the floor was old, with a dizzying pattern of multi-colored swirls. His phone buzzed and he looked at the display. "Hey, John."
How's Cam?
"I don't know. They won't let me in to see him."
That's sucks.
"Tell me. After what happened to us, this is like getting kicked in the gut when you're already down."
You want me to come over?
"Cam's folks are on the way."
That should be fun.
The nurse at the desk was waving him over. "I've got to go. I think they're going to let me in to see Cam."
Good. You take care of him, and yourself. I don't have so many friends that I can afford to lose you two.
Evan thumbed off and went over to the desk. "Well?"
"You can go back, sir. Treatment area 122."
"Thank you!" Evan could have kissed her and she looked like she wished he would. She'd have to settle for his sincere gratitude. His kisses were taken. He hurried to Cam's room. That he had been admitted to the base hospital, not confined to the infirmary at Cheyenne Mountain, was a concern, but it also meant that his injuries were treatable by normal medical procedures and not dependent on alien technologies to heal him. So, things were bad, but not life-threatening.
He pushed aside the curtain and paused. Cam looked so bled out, so bruised, so Goddamned fragile that Evan's breath stopped. He was sleeping or unconscious, hooked up to monitors that were blessedly stable. Judging from the bags of blood and fluids hanging on the IV poles, Cam had lost too much blood. One wrist was in a cast. Evan didn't want to think what else was hidden beneath the blankets on the bed.
Cam's chart was in a holder on the wall and Evan took it out. His sister was a doctor, so some of the terminology was familiar to him. Blunt force trauma to his liver and spleen, broken ribs, a burn on his left side, hairline fracture of his wrist, concussion, contusions ... the list seemed endless. He still didn't know what had happened, but he was getting some ugly vibes that it hadn't been an accident.
He pulled a chair up to the side of the bed and kissed Cam's hand. His skin was hot and dry. Add fever to the list; probably an infection of some kind. "You are in some sorry shape, Babe," Lorne sighed. He brushed his hand over Cam's short, rough hair. His thumb caressed Cam's forehead, smoothing out the furrowed line of pain over his right brow. "But I'm here, at least until your folks make it in from Kansas, so you're not alone." He sat back in the chair, still holding Cam's hand. It was going to be a long night.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Evan was awakened by voices outside the curtain. Feeling muzzy from sleep, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He heard Frank and Wendy Mitchell, and a man's voice he assumed was one of Cam's doctors. He started to push away from the bed, but Cam's grip tightened on his.
"Don't leave," he rasped.
"Hey, flyboy," Evan smiled. "How are you doing?"
"They gave me the good drugs. I don't feel much of anything but thirsty."
Evan hadn't seen any NPO orders, and there was a carafe of water next to the bed. He poured some into a glass and slid his arm behind Cam, supporting him while he sipped. Cam's hand came up and wrapped around his wrist. "Promise you'll stay."
"Cam ..." he sighed, thinking of all the problems his presence could raise. He couldn't resist the plea in Cam's blue eyes. "I'll stay," he promised. "But your folks are outside."
Cam gave a ghost of a laugh. "Great. Every time they see you, I'm in the hospital. We've got to stop meeting like this."
"Yeah, it's getting old." Evan bent to kiss Cam. "Be good."
"Baby, I'm always good." Not so convincing when he was flat on his back looking like he'd gone ten rounds with a UFC champion.
The curtain slid aside while Evan was still holding Cam. Awkward, but not impossible to explain away, since he also still had the glass of water in his hand. Wendy came in first, followed by Frank. For all they noticed him, Evan might as well have been invisible. He backed away, leaving the bedside clear for Cam's parents, feeling like an interloper and wondering if he should slip outside. The entry was blocked by Frank Mitchell and the doctor, so he was stuck there.
"Cameron, what have you done this time?" Wendy kissed him.
"Ran into a bad driver."
"Do the police have him in custody?" Frank asked as his sharp eyes assessed Cam's condition. Before Cam could even think of answering came the important question, "How are you, son?"
"A little banged-up, but I'll be okay. Mom, Dad, you remember -- "
He was cut off by the entrance of the doctor. He came in and took Cam's vital signs, scribbling on his chart before remarking, "Better. Much better. We'll be moving you into a room shortly."
"Good. The decor in this place sucks."
"Cameron!" Wendy choked back a laugh of relief, hiding it behind reproof.
Cam tried again, "Mom, Dad, you remember Evan?" He held out his hand. Evan pretended he didn't see the gesture, but he did step out of the corner.
"Yes, of course. Major Lorne, it's good to see you again."
"Evan, ma'am. I'm sorry it has to be in the hospital."
"That seems to happen too often," Cam's dad said, and Evan wondered if he had noticed Cam extending his hand to him.
"You know I am here," Cam muttered. "And folks, there is a reason why Evan is always here when I need him --"
"Cam --" Evan warned quietly, concerned that it was the drugs talking and not reason.
"Cam, dear. Of course, we understand. You need a friend with you."
Cam moved restlessly, and Evan put a hand on his shoulder. "Easy, Cam. We're all good here, right?" he soothed, hoping Cam could read his mind.
"Yeah, sure."
Evan would have told him to quit sulking if he didn't suddenly look so worn out and pathetic. He touched Cam's shoulder again. "Hey, listen. I'm beat. I'm going to get some coffee and some food. You have a visit with your folks and I'll see you later, okay?"
"Not too late," Cam suggested.
"No. Not too late." He nodded to Cam's parents and left, hoping that Cam would keep quiet about their relationship. They had talked about this the last time Evan had been at SGC, then Atlantis had happened and the Daedalus. He still didn't know what his next assignment would be. Back to space, or on a Gate team. This thing with Cam was lousy timing. It wasn't that he was a coward about admitting his homosexuality; he was long past that. He just didn't want Cam to be hurt, and he didn't want their careers to suffer because of it. The military, inching at a glacial pace to abolish DADT, wasn't a forgiving institution. Cam's dad was all about the military. He glowed with pride when he talked about Cam. Wendy Mitchell did, too. She was always talking about how handsome Cam was in his uniform, and how the girls were all crazy for him, and how one of these days he'd find the right one and settle down.
There were times when Evan wanted to grab Cam and kiss him right in front of his folks, and other times, when he wanted to put his head down and cry. Mostly, he was fighting anger. Anger that Cam hadn't told his folks, anger that he felt he had to hide his feelings, anger that they couldn't be together. The walls seemed to close in on him. He had to get out of here ...
He went to the gym and worked out until sweat poured from his body, until his muscles ached. Then he pushed himself some more until he sank down to the floor, his hands curled loosely on his knees, his chest heaving, and sweat running down his face.
"Beating yourself up isn't going to make Cam better," John crouched in front of him. Then he realized that something had happened to drive Lorne to this ... this punishment. He gripped Evan's arms. "God, please tell me it's not Cam. Is he all right? Has something happened?"
"Cam's fine. His folks are there. I just had to get out for a while. I had to do something. You know how it is."
"Yeah, I know," John said softly. "Here. You need this."
Lorne took a deep drink of of the water John pressed into his hand before he continued. "Cam hasn't ... he won't tell his folks about us. About the way he is. It makes me feel like shit." He was being honest for the first time about himself, about his feelings. He took another swallow. "Like we're nothing compared to his family. It's just hard."
"God, I'm sorry, Evan. How much of this has to do with ... you know, the military?" John lowered his voice even though they were alone in the gym.
"Not as much as I wish it were," Evan said. "We've talked about DADT. His family is an entirely different matter. He nearly told his folks today, but between the drugs and how crummy he felt, I couldn't let him do it. So, why am I angry?"
John sat next to him. "Because you're afraid he won't tell them when he's better. You're one of the lucky ones. Your family is awesome. To be accepted and encouraged and loved, that's special."
"I know. Believe me, I know. That's part of the problem. My problem."
"I can't help you with this one. You have to talk to Cam."
"I love him, John."
"I figured that out." He stood up. "If you feel like talking, sparring, anything, you know where to find me."
"Thanks." He winced as John pulled him to his feet. "It helps." He was more grateful than he could say that John was able to put aside their professional relationship and go back to the days when he, Cam, and Evan were just friends sharing a house and on the verge of a huge adventure.
He hadn't felt young then, and he felt even older now. Or maybe he just wanted to know that he had a safe haven; somebody who understood him, and who needed him as much as he needed them. He wanted that person to be Cam. He wanted it so much that it hurt.
He showered, nabbed a bed in the BOQ for a nap, and woke up three hours later, feeling sore, but rested. He took two ibuprofen, did some stretches to work out the knots, and went back to the hospital. He was calmer now, more rational without the stress of waiting in the ER for hours and post-mission jangling nerves. He went into Cam's room, not knowing what to expect.
What he didn't expect was the overwhelming wave of love he felt when he looked at him. Cam's perfect mouth was lightly closed, his lashes sweet and soft on his cheeks. He looked heartbreaking. Evan was lost. He took Cam's lax hand in his and kissed him.
Cam's eyes opened, and Evan felt his smile. "Who am I? Sleeping Beauty?"
"Does that make me Prince Charming?"
"If the shoe fits ..."
"Different fairy tale. Where are your folks?"
"I sent them to get dinner. I love my mom but I can only take so much of 'my poor baby' before I bury my head under the pillow."
Evan smiled. "She's a mom. She loves you. So does your dad."
"My dad ..." Cam sighed. "I love my dad."
"I know." His thumbs moved over Cam's knuckles. "I understand. I do, but I love you, too."
Cam's hand curved over his cheek, slid to the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss him. "I love you, Ev, but why did you stop me earlier?"
Evan's eyes opened wide. "You remember?"
"Yeah, why wouldn't I?"
"I thought it was the drugs talking. I didn't want you to say something you'd regret once the fog cleared."
"The fog has cleared. But now that I think about it, can we wait until I'm out of here? A military hospital isn't the best place in the world to come out in public."
"You got that right. I'm risking enough every time I look at you."
"Don't stop looking at me," Cam teased.
"I never will. I will, however, let you get your rest. I need to sleep, and so do you. See you in the morning." He risked one quick, sweet kiss before he backed away and slid the curtain back in place. He turned to find himself nearly nose to nose with Frank Mitchell.
For a moment, he panicked. Had they seen anything? Heard anything? He did a quick threat assessment, because that was what he had been trained to do. No, they were relaxed, smiling, if a bit startled at his sudden appearance. "Ah, hi." Smooth, Evan. Real smooth,
"Major."
"Evan, please. Um, I was just saying goodnight. Cam's still awake, though."
"Goodnight, Evan," Wendy said. She patted his arm. "Thank you for taking care of Cam."
"No problem. He's ... he's a good friend." God, how lame was that?
"You look like you could use some rest, Major," Frank said. Still not sure enough of him to call him by his first name, but there was a thaw from this morning. That wouldn't last once Cam revealed the truth. Frank would always love Cam, but could he accept him? Evan didn't want to consider the possibilities. He already had a headache.
"Yes, sir." He inclined his head out of respect and started down the hall. He heard Wendy say to her husband, "He's such a nice boy."
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The next morning, his gate team was called away on a mission that turned out to be longer and more complicated than he had expected. When they returned, three days later, SGC was in a state of controlled panic. Called to Landry's office immediately, he was too sweaty, dirty and unshaven when he faced the General.
"Major, your former CO has taken it upon himself to return to the Pegasus galaxy to save Atlantis from the replicators, along with Dr. Weir, Dr. Beckett and Rodney McKay -- against orders, I might add. Tell me you had no idea that he might try to do that?"
"I had no idea, sir," he replied dutifully. "Replicators in Atlantis? What happened to the Ancients? Aren't General O'Neill and Mr. Woolsey there?"
Landry's anger faded. "I doubt they are still alive."
"Sir, I wouldn't bet against the Colonel. If the General and Mr. Woolsey are alive, Colonel Sheppard will get them back and take care of the replicators," Lorne was trying to answer the general's questions, but what he really wanted was to get in a jumper and join Sheppard and the others. Atlantis was his home ... anybody with the ATA gene felt a connection, and his was nearly as strong as John's.
"You sound certain of that."
"I know the Colonel, sir. I know the city."
Landry saw behind Evan's implied plea. "You are not joining them, Major. Get cleaned up. Until we know for sure what's happening, you're staying on Earth."
Lorne's heart sank. "Yes, sir." He left feeling angry and helpless, which was how he had felt when he had left three days ago. He called the base hospital at Peterson to ask about Cam and was told he had been released. That was all the information they could give to him. Of course it was, because in this world, he counted for nothing.
Feeling like crap, and not only due to the grime and fatigue, he took a quick shower, shaved and borrowed a jeep to drive over to Peterson. He went up to Cam's room and found Cam, dressed jeans and a sweater, his boot laces trailing on the floor. He looked pale and frustrated. When he saw Evan he said, "You are the answer to my prayers." He grinned, sending Evan's heart into overdrive. "How was the mission?"
"How did you know where I was?" Evan went to the bedside. He didn't touch Cam, didn't trust that some nurse or doctor wouldn't come in at a bad moment. Cam made the move Evan wouldn't.
He took Evan's hand and kissed his palm. "A little piece of technology called a telephone. Sam told me." "You look exhausted."
"I'm fine. Are you being discharged?'
"As soon as I get my boots on. The only problem is I can't get my boots on without my ribs screaming in pain when I lean over to tie them."
"You just want me on my knees." Evan's blue eyes glinted wickedly.
Cam groaned. "Just tie the boots so we can get out of here."
"You aren't breaking out of here against medical advice?" Lorne asked, knowing Cam well enough to think that could be a possibility.
"No! I've go my discharge papers right here." He patted his pocket. "You are suspicious."
"Blame it on Sheppard."
"Right." He was silent as Evan tied his boots. "Let's get out of here. I should warn you that my folks are still in town."
"At your place?"
"No!" Cam looked appalled. "Landry set them up in a very nice condo of their own, thank God." He stood up, winced as he straightened. He held out a hand when Evan made a move to support him. "Just take it slow. I'll be fine after the kinks get stretched out. Don't say it, Ev."
"Me? Never. Well, maybe not never, just not tonight." Cam's discharge orders arrived and Evan drove him home in the growing twilight.
There were lights on in Cam's condo, and the aroma of roasting meat and potatoes wafted out when Evan opened the door. Cam sighed and called out, "Mom?" The more quietly. "I did not see this one coming. Sorry."
"I won't turn my nose up at a home-cooked meal."
Wendy came into the living room, dusting flour off her hands. "Cam," she scolded. "What are you doing here? You were supposed to wait for us." She took her cell phone out of her pocket. "Call your father and tell him to come home. If I had known Major Lorne was going to pick you up, I wouldn't have sent him to get you."
"Umm, it would have been nice if you had kept me in the loop. Dad will love knowing he made that trip for nothing." He made the call, dutifully apologetic, and sat on the sofa. His head tipped back against the cushions. "As always, a snafu."
"Hopefully, not a FUBAR," Evan joked. "Are you okay for dinner?"
"I'd better be. I'll just sit here for a while. Join me?"
Frank Mitchell was not happy to have driven through rush hour traffic for no reason ... twice. Given his handicap, Evan could sympathize. Dinner was awkward. Wendy tended to flutter when she was upset which didn't improve Frank's mood. Cam was looking more pale and tired by the minute. Evan was caught between them, not wanting to upset Cam's parents, but also trying to protect Cam; exhausted himself, longing to get into bed and curl up against the warmth of Cam's body. He wanted the night to end.
When the last dish was cleared, Evan stood up. "Mrs. Mitchell, the dinner was delicious. Thank you both very much. But Cam should go to bed."
"I'm fine," Cam protested, subsiding when Evan glared at him.
Wendy looked doubtful. "Cam, do you want me to stay tonight?"
"No!" Cam and Evan replied in unison, startling both of the Mitchells into silence. "I'll stay," Evan said evenly. "He'll be fine."
"You don't have to do that, Major."
"Dad ... I want Evan to stay."
Not prefer, not need, but want. Evan looked at Cam. Push had come to shove. Evan held out his hand. Cam took it, right there, right in front of his parents. "I have a box full of medals for bravery up in my room, but I've been a coward about one part of my life. I want Evan to stay, because I love him. We've been together for a while now. I don't know if you can understand this, but I want you to love Evan, too."
Silence. Frank and Wendy looked shell-shocked. Cam looked close to breaking down. Evan backed away. "Umm, I'll just ... get some fresh air. Cam, you need to be with your folks right now. I won't be far." He beat a retreat out the back door to the deck and sank down on the steps. This was not how he had wanted Cam to come out to his folks, but beggars couldn't be choosers. He had nothing else to say in the matter. It was up to Cam. His presence inside would only fan the emotional flames.
He heard the door slide open. "Have they left?"
"Yeah." Cam sat beside Evan and pulled his head down on his shoulder. "My mom looked like I had told her I had cancer, and my dad looked at me like I was a stranger who had hurt him for no reason. I never thought it would be so hard."
"Maybe we should have waited, kept up the pretense. I pushed you --"
"You didn't." Cam sighed. "I was tired of lying to them. Tired of hiding and pretending. Telling them has to be better than having them walk in on us in a lip-lock."
Evan laughed. "Okay. That would be massively awkward. It will get better, Cam. Your folks love you. It will all come down to that."
"I'm tired. Let's go to bed."
"Are you sure you want me there tonight?"
"I'm sure."
They went inside. By the time Evan came out of the bathroom, Cam was deeply asleep, one arm outstretched as if inviting him to fill the space. Evan slid under the covers and Cam's arm wrapped around his shoulder, drawing him close. Evan settled there, half asleep before his head hit the pillow. Cam murmured in his sleep. The only word that mattered was love.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Evan woke up early feeling far too warm for the temperature Cam usually kept his bedroom. Cam had tossed off his covers, was moving restlessly. When Evan touched his face, the skin was burning hot. That got him upright fast. He was on the phone to the 911 as he pulled on his jeans. Cam was too incoherent for Evan to get him into a car and drive him to the hospital.
When the paramedics arrived, Evan used Cam's phone to call the Mitchells. Nothing about this was easy. He gave Frank a terse account of what had happened; and he supposed they wondered how exactly he had discovered Cam was ill. He wasn't about to tell them. He hung up, ran to his jeep, and drove as quickly as the law allowed to the hospital.
By the time he got there, Cam was in the treatment area. Frank and Wendy hadn't arrived yet, and feeling a bit guilty, Evan took advantage of their absence. "Can I go back?" he asked. The attendant, recognizing him from the day before, opened the door for him.
Cam was awake, but still groggy. "Hey," he murmured. "Didn't expect to wake up here."
"I know. You scared the daylights out of me, spiking a fever like that." He rested his palm on Cam's forehead. "You're still hot."
"Literally or figuratively?"
"To me, both." He bent and kissed his forehead. "I feel like this is my fault."
"How do you figure that?"
"A little too much emotion and stress with your folks?"
"Don't. I have an infection. I'm on antibiotics. I'll be fine."
He didn't look it. Too pale, with shadows beneath his eyes and a draw of pain to his mouth that Evan hated to see. "You should rest," he said. He started to get up, but Cam caught his hand.
"Stay. I sleep better when you're here."
"Now that's just not fair," Evan sat down and held his hand. "Okay. Close your eyes."
"Okay."
Ten seconds later, he was out. Five minutes later, Cam's parents opened the door. Evan didn't bother letting go. He stayed where he was, Cam's fingers curled in his, his body turned slightly towards him. He wouldn't get defensive, not about this. For better or worse, the Mitchells would have to come to terms with their relationship.
Cam's mother came in first, her "poor baby" expression in her eyes. Evan released Cam's hand and let her sit next to him. Frank didn't even look at Evan; he went right to Cam. Evan, feeling like the third wheel and more than a little sick, left them to be a family.
He called Samantha Carter to ask if there had been any news on Atlantis. She either wouldn't say, or didn't know. Her voice gave him no clues. Selfishly, he wished John were here to talk to because he was in a cold and lonely place without Cam. His sister, for all her support, had her own young family to worry about. Talk to a priest? He didn't think so.
At a loss, he went to the cafeteria to get coffee, which he didn't need, and something to eat, which he did. The headache building behind his eyes was getting worse. He found a corner booth hidden behind a pillar and sat, chewing on a dry blueberry muffin and sipping bitter coffee. When he had finished, he rested his head against the hard cushions, just wanting to be alone, to be silent.
"Major ... Evan?" Wendy's voice made him sit up. "May I join you?"
Startled, but always polite, he nodded. "Yes, ma'am."
"I thought you'd like to know that the doctor said Cam will be fine. They're keeping him here for 24 hours of IV antibiotics, but then he should be able to go home."
"That's good news," Evan said, relief washing over him. He hadn't been aware of the depth of his worry until it was eased by Wendy's words. "Thank you."
"No, I should thank you for being there for Cameron. Not just last night, but for all the other times we couldn't be there for him. What you do, it's not easy, is it?"
"No, but we wouldn't have it any other way."
"He's so like his father." She gave him a wistful smile. "Do you take after your father?"
Evan shook his head. "I don't know. He died just before I started at the Air Force Academy. My mom never said I was like him, but she never said I wasn't, either. She said he would be proud of me."
"Did he know you were ... you know?" she asked.
"You can say it. It's not a curse." Evan's bitterness made her straighten her back in indignation. "Yes, he knew I'm gay. I told him when I was thirteen that I felt different. But he and my mom were artists. My godparents are a gay couple. It wasn't, it isn't, a stigma. It's just what I am, like I have blue eyes."
"We didn't know. He never talked about it. I feel like we let him down."
"No," Evan took her hand. "God, when Cam talks about you and your family, he lights up. He loves you a lot, Mrs. Mitchell."
"Why didn't he tell us?"
Evan's brow slanted. He held out his hands like the platens of a scale. "Kansas. San Francisco."
She smiled at him. "I understand, I think. It will take some time."
"And your husband?"
"Frank loves Cameron. He's so proud of him. Cam has been through so much. Frank sees this as an obstacle thrown in the path of his career. The military isn't particularly tolerant."
"Believe me, I know that. However, there have been gays in the military for centuries. Most western countries, our allies, allow gays to serve openly. We'll have to accept that eventually. Sooner rather than later, DADT will be repealed."
"Then you and Cam will ...?"
"Go on with our lives like we have been. We don't serve together, ma'am. He's not my commanding officer. I'm away most of the time. Cam isn't always here when I am. We'll get through it like every military family does."
"Family?"
"Cam is my family. This may be hard for you to hear, but I love him. I don't see that ever changing. I love him now, and I'll love him until we're both old and gray."
Wendy patted his hand. "Give us time, Maj --"
"I think you ought to call me Evan now that you know all my secrets."
"Evan, give us time."
"I would die for him, but I can't stop loving him."
To his embarrassment, Wendy's eyes filled with tears that spilled down her cheeks. He passed over his handkerchief. As he did, his phone vibrated against his thigh. He dug it out of his pocket and looked at the text. "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I have to get back to Cheyenne Mountain. I'd like to see Cam before I leave."
"Of course." She pushed away from the table. "I'll find something to occupy Frank."
Wendy dragged Frank from Cam's bedside with a firm hand and voice, telling him he needed something to eat or she would have two Mitchell men in the hospital. Evan nodded at Frank as he went inside and received a slight nod in return, which was better than a killing glare. Cam was still sleeping, and as much as Evan wanted to let him sleep, he couldn't leave for Atlantis without saying goodbye.
He kissed Cam awake. "Hey, I got a text from SGC. Sheppard, that lucky sonofabitch, regained control of Atlantis from the Replicators. We're going back!" He couldn't contain his emotion. "I have to report in an hour to return to Pegasus."
Cam gave him a rueful smile. "You love it, don't you?"
"I feel like I've been waiting to go back forever. The city sings to us. I feel it, hear it. It's where I belong right now."
"I'll miss you."
"It's not like I never make it back to Earth," Evan said. His fingers brushed lightly over the hair at Cam's temples. "You will always bring me back." He glanced at the curtains around the bed. They were closed, and he bent to kiss Cam, tasting his sweetness, feeling the shape of his lips; cool and perfect. Cam's breath sighed into Evan's mouth. "Promise me next time you won't be in the hospital."
Cam laughed softly. "Yeah. I'll make a note of that." He kissed Evan again. "Definitely."
"I love you."
"Love you, too." He stroked lightly over the back of Evan's hand. "My folks will, too. They just need time."
"So, time is on our side?"
"Time, patience, love. We can do this, Ev."
"We have to do it." One last kiss, brief and filled with passion and promise. He left, leaned against the wall of the ER and tried not to cry. He left the hospital quickly and drove to SGC. Two hours later, he was packed and stepping through the gate to the Midway Station.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Six months later, Evan was back on Earth and this time, it was his turn to be flat on his back in the base hospital, following a bout with a nasty Pegasus virus. Everybody else had recovered, but he suffered from headaches, intermittent fevers and general malaise. He had hidden it well until he collapsed ignominiously in the gym after sparring with Ronon. When Keller could find no reason for his illness, he was sent back to SGC for more diagnostic tests.
On his first visit, Cam had to wear a mask, gown and gloves. They couldn't touch, just speak through the muffling fabric. By the second visit, Evan was responding to an anti-viral serum developed during the Prior epidemic. It hadn't stopped the Prior virus, but it seemed to be effective against influenza and whatever virus he had been harboring in his bloodstream. When Cam came in, he was sitting up and eating blue Jell-O.
"Whoa," Cam laughed. "That looks like something that will give you a virus, not recover from one."
"I like it."
"So, you're still sick. I get it." Cam kissed his forehead. "You look terrible."
"I don't have a mirror."
"Just as well." Cam's fingers brushed down his stubbled cheek. "You need to shave. You also need to eat something more substantial than blue Jell-O."
"Is that an offer?"
"You bet."
"Dr. Lam said I could get out of here in a day or so as long as my blood tests come out clean. Here's hoping."
"I miss you."
Evan sighed. He set the Jell-O aside and sank down against the pillows. "I know. This is just insane, me in Atlantis, you here."
"Are you saying you want to give it up? That doesn't sound like you, Ev."
"No! It was just a general observation. I'm tired. That's all."
"Okay," Cam said slowly. "I need to get you out of here, take you someplace where you can rest up, have some home-cooking."
"I've had your cooking,"
"Are you dissing my culinary skills?"
"You can grill and open a jar of spaghetti sauce with the best of then."
Cam laughed, then sobered. "I was thinking about taking you to Kansas." His eyes were watching Evan's, blue and bright, hopeful and doubtful.
"Cam ... your folks aren't too keen on me. On us. Are you sure you want to put them on the spot like that?"
"I love my folks, Ev. But I'm in love with you. They've had me for the first part of m life, but you have me forever." He brushed Evan's hair from his forehead. "What do you say, flyboy?"
"I've never backed down from a fight. This would be a lousy time to start." Cam squeezed his hand. The look in his eyes sealed Evan's decision. He had faced the Wraith and survived. Kansas wasn't nearly as threatening.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Kansas wasn't as flat as he had expected. Cam's family farm was set amidst gently rolling fields and rich fields of wheat and corn. The house was old and sprawling, white frame siding and neat. A US flag fluttered in a light breeze and a bright yellow ribbon hung on the newel post. It was so damn American that it was almost a cliche.
"You okay?" Cam asked him.
"Yeah. Wasn't Clark Kent born here?" he asked, a little overcome by the postcard perfection of it all.
"No Superman, just me." He slid his fingers through Evan's hair, drew him close. "Nobody to see us but the cows, he said softly. His tongue teased Evan's lower lip and he sighed and opened to his lover. He didn't know if he'd have another chance like this for a while.
They parted, but the sweetness lingered. "Okay, let's do this."
"Relax, it's not like they're armed with P-90s."
They were armed with parental disapproval, Evan thought, which was just as deadly. However, when they drove up to the house, Frank and Wendy were opening the door, waiting. When Wendy saw him she held out her hands, taking his and pulling him inside. "Maj-Evan, welcome. Cam, what were you thinking to drag him all the way out here? He looks exhausted."
"Mom, there are such things as airplanes. I didn't make him walk," he bent to kiss her cheek. "But she's right, Ev."
"I'm fine," he argued. He was watching Cam's father out of the corner of his eye. He held out his hand to Frank, "Sir, thank you for letting me visit."
Frank Mitchell was too polite to refuse to shake his hand. "You're welcome, Major. Come in, get off your feet. Wendy is right, you look exhausted."
"I'm fine," Evan repeated and glared at Cam.
Cam, determined now to take the bull by the horns, put his arm around his waist. "Mom's right. I brought you here for some R&R." He guided him into the cool, dim family room and led him to a well-worn and comfortable sofa. "Legs up." He arranged a pillow behind Evan's back and leaned in to whisper, "Let mom fuss over you. She loves that." Evan felt a quick brush of his lips against his earlobe, and a touch of Cam's hand before he stepped back.
Evan was smart enough to know that if he won Wendy over, Frank would thaw as well. Over the next few days, he let her fuss over and feed him, was unfailingly polite, offered to help (refused, of course), and hadn't been so spoiled since ... he didn't remember when.
Late one evening, after the Mitchells had retired for the night, he and Cam were sitting together on the couch, Evan reclining against Cam's chest, Cam with his arms wrapped about him. Cam was smiling down as Evan related a story about a typical day on Atlantis. When the story was finished, Cam bent and kissed him. Before he could object or even think of objecting, he was lost, all his good intentions swept away by longing and need.
Neither of them heard Cam's mother as she came into the family room. "Oh!" She gasped. "I'm sorry ... I just came down to take the chicken for tomorrow out of the freezer and I saw the light ... I didn't mean to spy or interrupt ..."
Evan felt Cam's heartbeat quicken, but he remained still in Cam's arms, waiting for some sort of cue on what would happen next. Cam sighed. "Mom, would it bother you if you walked in on a kiss between me and a girlfriend?"
"Really, Cameron. This is different."
"No, it isn't. I'm in love with Evan. You know that. I'm sorry if you're shocked -- "
"I am not shocked, Cameron, or upset. I just need a moment." She sat down, looking at them, at Evan, tense and ready to bolt, and her son, steady and honest. She looked at Cam's hand resting on Evan's chest, and at the way their bodies were aligned. She smiled wistfully. "You really do love each other."
It wasn't a question. Cam smiled at Evan. "See? No worries."
"I wouldn't say that," Wendy sighed. "There is your father." She rose and came over to the couch. She kissed Cam, then startled Evan with a kiss on the cheek. "Don't stay up too late."
"No, ma'am."
"Don't forget the chicken, mom."
"Goodnight, boys."
Evan started to say something, but Cam hushed him. "Not tonight. Let's just be together."
Who was he to argue with that?
^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The early morning sun was warm on his face, his bare arms. Evan tilted his head, enjoying the day. Cam was leading a new mare around the paddock, letting her get used to her new surroundings. His blue shirt was rolled to his elbows, his jeans clung to his long legs and were faded in all the right places. He looked at Evan and flashed that heart-stopping smile of his. Evan shaded his eyes and lifted his other hand in a thumbs up. Cam swept a bow and then led the mare into the barn.
"Major."
Evan steeled himself and turned to Cam's father. "Good morning, sir."
"So far."
"Does Cam know you're a glass half-empty kind of guy?" Evan asked tersely.
To his surprise, Frank Mitchell laughed. "I reckon I had that one coming."
Evan glanced towards the barn. "Sir, my CO says I can be kind of blunt, and I guess he's right. I like to get to the point. I don't have much patience when it comes to avoiding the truth, so I'm going to go ahead and be blunt. Cam is still your son, the same as he was before he met me. You can't make somebody gay. You can hate me for a lot of reasons, but not for turning Cam into somebody you don't know, because he is the same man you raised to be a hero, and he will be that forever no matter who he loves."
"Is that all?"
"That's it." Just then Cam came out of the barn.
"I'm starving. Let's see what mom made for breakfast." He put an arm around Evan's shoulders, gave his father a look that dared him to say anything, and guided Evan towards the house. They paused in the cool dark mudroom off the kitchen. "Is everything okay?" he asked as he toed off his boots.
"Oh, sure. You're father really hates me now."
"Why?
"For telling him it's not my fault you're gay. I don't think he believes me."
"You don't have to fight my battles, Evan."
"I know that, but I have to fight mine." He started to open the door to the kitchen. Cam caught his arm turned him and kissed him until Evan thought his bones would dissolve.
"Worth fighting for?" Cam asked.
"Worth it, totally." Evan leaned against him, reveling in Cam's hard muscles, the scent of soap, sweat and horse, his strength.
"You still feel thin. Let's get breakfast."
They sat at the table with the Mitchell's, conversation constrained by common knowledge. Wendy, watching them all with concern, Frank's gaze skating from Cam to Evan; seeing perhaps more than he should in the way their shoulders brushed, elbows touching, shared glances. It wasn't helping Evan's appetite to be under such close scrutiny. Of course, Wendy noticed.
"Evan, is everything all right? Can I get you anything?"
"Everything is fine, Mrs. Mitchell." He felt Cam stiffen and reflex made him reach over to touch his arm. "Really, Cam. Everything is fine."
Cam had reached his limit. He pushed his plate away. "Okay, folks. This isn't good for any of us, particularly Evan, so let's just talk it out before we get in the car and drive away. News flash, I'm gay. I've always been like this. Everything in my life has been influenced, for better or for worse, by it. I had to be the jock, the BMOC, the best pilot, the tough guy just to keep people from seeing what I was. Why do you think I left town? I had to get away." He swallowed hard. "Evan isn't my first boyfriend, but he will be my last. We're committed. We love each other like any other couple loves each other."
Frank Mitchell, looking a little queasy, asked. "What about your careers? What about DADT?"
"DADT isn't going to be around forever. Times are changing, people are changing. That objection isn't going to fly. Try another."
"What about children, Cam? You always wanted a family," Wendy said, her voice trembling a little bit as she looked at Evan.
"I'm going to have nieces and nephews galore if Cath and Mike keep going at it like bunnies. And ..." he paused to take Evan's hand. "That doesn't mean we won't have our own family one day. Right now, even if I were straight and in a relationship, I wouldn't have children. It's wouldn't be fair to them, and neither of us can afford the distraction. Next?"
"Are you sure this is forever?"
"Yes." Both Cam and Evan answered in one voice.
"I wasn't raised to condone this," Cam's father said. "It's hard to get over those hurdles."
"The Bible also says, 'Thou shalt not kill,' but I'm a soldier, and so is Evan. We've both taken lives. I've regretted killing, but I've never regretted falling in love with Evan. Accept that, accept me, accept us."
He stood up, still holding Evan's hand. "I have to check up on the feed order in town. Come with me?" He didn't give Evan a chance to answer before he tugged him towards the door. Once out in the driveway, he leaned against the truck rubbing his forehead. "I'm sorry."
"Tough morning," Evan said. He leaned in and kissed Cam, never minding that they were probably visible from the kitchen windows. "Thank you."
Cam's hands rested on his waist, and he straightened, then laid his head on Evan's shoulder. "Let's go home early."
"If that's what you want, we will." He soothed Cam and felt the tension slowly leave his body. "First, the feed store."
They got in the truck and drove into town. The computer had screwed up the order. By the time they got it straightened out and ran a few more errands, it was past noon. They went into the diner and ate lunch, then went back to the feed store and picked up the corrected order. Evan kept an eye on Cam; he had settled down and seemed his usual easy-going self, but he couldn't hide the small crinkle of worry at the corner of his eyes.
"Pull over," Evan said.
"Why? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, but just pull over."
Cam pulled off the road in the shade of a tree. A breeze came in through the open windows, ruffling Evan's sweat-damp hair. "Come here." He reached out and pulled Cam close for a proper kiss. He tasted like sweet tea and cherry pie. Evan stroked the hair at his temples with gentle fingers. He kissed him there, too, salt and sweat tingling on his lips. "None of this is easy," he sighed.
"And you thought our job was hard ..." Cam commented.
"Dodging physical bullets is easier than dodging emotional ones. I've known that most of my life."
Cam put the truck back into gear and pulled back on the road. "Well, let's dodge a few more and then head back home."
They drove up the long drive to the Mitchell house. They were nearly at the parking area when Cam hit the brakes. "Look!"
Evan took in the white house, the flag, the yellow ribbon. He blinked. Woven through the loops of bright yellow satin was a red streamer flying in the breeze; brave as the flag, hopeful as the ribbon. "Is that ... does that mean what I think it does?"
Before Cam could answer, his parents came out of the front door. Frank's arm was around Wendy, and they were both smiling; Wendy a little tremulously, Frank a little doubtfully, but smiling.
"I think we're okay," Cam said. "Somehow..."
They got out of the truck and walked up to the porch. "Nice ribbon," Evan said, his eyes on Cam's father. "Thank you."
"Like every other ribbon on your chest, you've earned it, son. You both have." He held out his hand to Evan. "I guess this is our way of saying welcome to the family."
Cam went over to his father, who awkwardly wrapped one arm around his shoulders. "Thanks, dad. I didn't mean to blindside you with this. That's my fault."
"It's nobody's fault. It's just the way we are." Frank sighed gustily. "I won't say this is easy, but I don't want this to stand between us. I love you, and I respect Major ... Evan. Nothing will change that. Understanding this whole thing -- that might take a while. Meanwhile, I never want you to think that you are unwelcome here, and if I act like an ass occasionally, that's just me being an ass. I'm as able to do that as any man."
Evan smiled, looked down at the toes of his boots. "I'll remember that, sir."
Cam drew a breath. "Can we go inside? Pop, I think the AC in the truck is on the fritz again. Evan and I will take a look at it after it cools off."
"Want to try a hand at fixing the gearshift on the tractor while you're at it?"
"That tractor needs to be retired to the tractor Hall of Fame."
"Nah, it's got years in it yet ..."
Wendy looked at Evan. "They'll go on like this for a while. Let's go inside and get some lemonade." She took his arm and gave it a squeeze. "Want to help?"
"Yes, ma'am." He smiled down at her. "You don't even have to ask." The went inside and listened to Cam and his father arguing amiably, laughing, arguing again. It sounded like home to Evan.
The End
Author's Note: This was a lot harder to write than I anticipated. I didn't want Cam's parents to be quite as accepting as they are in many fics, even my own, for this story; but I also didn't want them to be unlikeable. Even the best parents must have to struggle with their upbringing, their standards of morality, when a child comes out to them. I hope that I have shown that acceptance is an ongoing process for Cam's father, in particular. At the same time, I don't see his father as being a bigot, or blind to the pain Cam and Evan feel at his resistance to accept that Cam is gay and they are in a sexual relationship. Eventually, Frank will come to love Evan like a son, but as he says, "It might take a while."