Sick, tired, and emotional . . .
So I don't feel good at all, and I really just want to go home and see my Nana, but she's not there. She decided to go to Mass this weekend since I'm staying here for shopping on Saturday. And I'm wicked excited to go shopping with the ladies, but other than that I'm sort of dreading the weekend.
I don't know if it's my usual shit or if it's me feeling yucky, but I'm having anxiety about being all alone this weekend. Everyone has stuff going on, and that's awesome, but I don't feel good and the last thing I want to be is alone. Which is really no one's problem but my own, but still. I'm sitting here basically in tears because I don't know what to do . . .
I went to the health center on Tuesday, and the nurse told me I didn't have an ear infection but they hurt. And my throat hurts, and I can't sleep through a whole night. And I've tried drugs to help me sleep but I still wake up at like 4 in the morning. You know, when you're sick you just want the person who you love most in the world, and I can't have her because she's gone. And I don't know whether I should go back to the health center where they are useless or to the hospital where I'll look like a d-bag if there isn't anything wrong and I've wasted an ER doc's time. Orrrr . . . if I should call my doctor at home and try to get an appointment and drive up there tomorrow just for that. I don't effing know. I just know that I want my nana and my bed at home, and to not have to be in effing Farmington anymore.
Here I go to fake my way through the day . . . I hope.
I don't know if it's my usual shit or if it's me feeling yucky, but I'm having anxiety about being all alone this weekend. Everyone has stuff going on, and that's awesome, but I don't feel good and the last thing I want to be is alone. Which is really no one's problem but my own, but still. I'm sitting here basically in tears because I don't know what to do . . .
I went to the health center on Tuesday, and the nurse told me I didn't have an ear infection but they hurt. And my throat hurts, and I can't sleep through a whole night. And I've tried drugs to help me sleep but I still wake up at like 4 in the morning. You know, when you're sick you just want the person who you love most in the world, and I can't have her because she's gone. And I don't know whether I should go back to the health center where they are useless or to the hospital where I'll look like a d-bag if there isn't anything wrong and I've wasted an ER doc's time. Orrrr . . . if I should call my doctor at home and try to get an appointment and drive up there tomorrow just for that. I don't effing know. I just know that I want my nana and my bed at home, and to not have to be in effing Farmington anymore.
Here I go to fake my way through the day . . . I hope.