Fic: In a Crowded place, Chap. 5/5, R (L/V, Logan POV)
Title: In a Crowded Place, Chap. 5/5 - Complete
Author: rubie_so_ho (Amanda)
Rating: R (suggestive phrase)
Word Count: 3,092
Pairing: Logan and Veronica, Logan POV, (cameos by Dick & Beaver)
Spoilers: Up to 2x14 (not even, but just to be sure)
Summary: Logan tries to deal with the possibility that he'll never get her back...
Disclaimer: All Rob's, boo.
Other Disclaimer: I got the title from "You're Beautiful," by James Blunt. Lyrics to follow at bottom.
A/N: I lurve feedback!
--
It’d been a week since Duncan left for Napa. The suite felt cold and empty, and Logan avoided staying there. He spent his days bumming around town with Dick and occasionally Beaver. The three of them would while their mornings away in the surf, until their backs and legs ached from over-activity. They spent their afternoons lounging on the beach, tanning their already-overexposed skin under the midday sun’s rays.
This day was no different than the rest. After surfing for a few hours and catching lunch from a nearby hot dog stand, the boys settled into the sand. Logan laid back with one arm resting beneath his head. He stared up into the cloudless sky as he felt the sand shift to accommodate his body. The salt from the ocean began to dry against his deeply-tanned skin, leaving him feeling grimy and brittle. He constantly rewetted his lips, licking them every few seconds, trying to escape the feeling that he was drying up into nothingness, about to become one with the sand below him.
Logan had been tired and muted the past few days, and he knew that it had not gone unnoticed by the brothers Casablancas. Despite their concern, they refrained from bothering him. They didn’t even appear to mind when he was noticeably silent during their daily brotherly bickerings. Logan knew that Dick had told Beaver about Fallout 2006, and was thankful that they were leaving him alone.
Alone. He felt as though he personified it.
He hadn’t heard from her since that day, that moment…when she’d walked into the living room, before he and Dick, her face flushed with embarrassment. She had hastily retreated, doing what she did best. Her avoidance of him felt familiar, like a worn-out old coat. She ran. He hated this quality of hers once, but now he was complacent.
He was convinced this was the way it would always be.
The waters would get rough, too difficult to navigate. And she would bail.
During the past days, as he lay baking in the sand beneath the hot midsummer sun, he had considered a life without her.
Her admission of love for him did not fool him. His heart had soared with joy at first, but he had been brought back down to earth with realization. She had only confessed her feelings after being backed into a corner, and only at Duncan’s behest.
So he allowed himself to ponder what moving on would feel like.
He’d never moved on, not ever. He’d gotten over Lilly when his lips first brushed against Veronica’s, but nothing ever cured him of his Veronica-hangover. When his hips would grind into Kendall’s, he thought of Veronica. When Hannah’s lithe body draped against his in a sweet embrace, he thought of Veronica. She permeated his very being. She never left, not really.
But she’d become a part of him, like a limb, an eye, an ear. He couldn’t really function without her. She was his crutch.
He needed to cut her out.
Her absence, her silence - made it clear to him that she wasn’t going to be his. Not again. Not ever.
Every so often, as he lay in the sand next to the boisterous Casablancases, he would open one eye and attempt to check out the beach beauties that passed before them. He would nod as Dick would whistle lewdly but appreciatively at the cute, tanned girls in their cute, expensive bikinis.
To no avail, however. No matter how pretty their faces, how sweet their curves, none of them rivaled her beauty in his mind’s eye.
It drove him insane.
On this day, he fidgeted. He felt uncomfortable, uneasy, insatiable. He felt more and more delicate under the drying sea salt, and itchy from the sand beneath him. His hair felt waxy and dirty. He tasted like salt and dirt. And he was restless. He was pissed, sad, and frustrated.
He wanted to purge himself. Purge himself of her.
And that is why, in the middle of the day, as Dick and Beaver discussed the pros and cons of women’s pierced tongues, he leapt up, screaming, and hurled himself into the ocean with all the force he could muster.
He plunged his body deep beneath the waves, wiggling his body like a dolphin would. The rocks and shells and debris on the ocean floor scraped his stomach, but he didn’t flinch. He dove deeper and deeper till he felt the pressure rising in his ears and his lungs. He stopped, and gave into life, gave into nature, gave into complacency. With a wry smile of surrender painted on his lips, he allowed the air in his lungs and his relative weightlessness to push him to the surface. As he rose, he screamed again, and when he broke the plane between water and sky, his screams sounded out against the mid-afternoon air, punctuated by heavy coughs and the beginnings of a sob.
She made him feel helpless. How could one person make another feel like this? Was it healthy? He bet that it wasn’t.
He turned in the water, treading in place. He choked on the brackish air around him, and breathed heavily to regain some composure.
Yards and yards away he could see Dick and Beaver on the edge of the water, shouting and waving their arms. He wasn’t far out enough to miss the look of confusion on Dick’s pretty-boy face, or the expression of pure fear on Beaver’s.
He sympathized with Beaver at that moment. He was scared, too.
He sucked in a long breath and dipped below the surface again. He opened up his eyes underwater, and it was dark. All he could see was bits of detritus floating through the water, fluttering against the rays of light piercing through the waves. He stared straight ahead. He felt so alone, so hurt.
Where had she been? He had been too afraid to call her, but he thought she’d have called him, or stopped by.
She’d left a few things about the suite. Occasionally he would find a hair tie, or a necklace, or a piece of paper she’d scribbled on. She was everywhere in the suite. Her scent tinged the stale air. The shower still smelled like her shampoo. It was funny to him. Duncan hadn’t left a trace of himself anywhere. But she was a constant.
He bobbed to the surface again, and looked out toward his friends. They were no longer shouting and screaming or flailing like idiots.
They were talking to their newly arrived visitor and her four-legged companion.
He placed his face in the water and blew bubbles for a long moment. Lifting his head just enough so his eyes peered out across the waves’ surface, he could see Dick and Beaver standing with their hands on their hips, shaking their respective heads and talking to the visitor.
She lifted her hand to shield her eyes as she looked out over the water. Logan felt like melting into the ocean.
He watched her from afar. She looked puzzled and concerned. Biting her lower lip, she appeared to make a decision, and she handed Dick Backup’s leash. Crossing her arms around her body, she lifted her shirt above her head and threw it on the ground. As she moved, Logan held his breath, only to see that she’d come prepared, bathing suit and all. She continued to look toward him as she kicked off her flip-flops and shorts in one sweeping motion.
Logan tread water cautiously, willing himself to stay in that spot. He fought against the current, kicking through the water as though he were walking backward.
She walked out to the water without hesitation, and he watched as her body was slowly enveloped by the waves, until all he saw was a shock of blonde hair against the dark turquoise of the sea. She lifted her arms over the water and swam slowly and methodically in his direction.
She stopped a foot in front of him and began to tread, too. She watched his arms and matched his rhythm.
“So. Whatcha doin’?” she intoned. Her breaths created little ripples in the water under her nose.
“Nothing.” He looked at the ripples, avoiding her eyes.
“Ah. I see.” She squinted at him. “So I guess ‘nothing’ includes running into the ocean, screaming at the top of your lungs, and scaring the bejesus out of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dick?”
“Yes, exactly that.”
“Mm-hmm.” She didn’t look satisfied. “Okay Logan, I’ll bite. What is up with you, anyway?”
“Blurbleblurblah,” he mumbled into the water.
“Ahem.” She lifted a finger out and tipped his chin up. “Repetez, s’il vous plait.”
“Oui, Mademoiselle Mars.” He laughed half-heartedly. “I don’t know. I just…felt like having a scream.”
“I don’t know what you’re selling, Echolls, but I ain’t buying.”
“Yeah, well, you wouldn’t.” He wasn’t sure what that meant, but he said it with defiance sharpening his tongue.
“Huh?” Yeah, his thoughts exactly. He had no idea what he was saying, or what to say.
“Where have you been, Veronica?” he felt his heart sink deeper into his chest, but summoned enough courage to finally look her in the eye.
“I’ve been…busy.” It was her turn to avoid eye contact. She leaned her head back, wetting her hair up to her forehead.
“Busy…not talking to me?”
She whipped her head forward, a shocked expression gracing her features. “You’re one to talk!”
He gave her a look of ‘Who? Me?’
“Yes, you. You,” she reached forward a finger to poke him in the chest, “could have called me, you know.”
“I’m not sure there’s anything for us to talk about, Veronica,” he breathed out bitterly. He reached up a hand to caress the spot she’d poked. He thought he felt an indentation above his heart.
“Oh.”
They stared at each other, treading water in time. Veronica looked up at the sky, tipping her head back again. She stretched her arms out to her side, and stroked them through the water in one, strong movement until she was further away from him, and that much closer to the shore. Her tiny feet and legs followed until they were stretched out in front of her.
Logan watched silently as she floated in front of him. Her body bobbed against the light surf. Her chest heaved up and down, her breaths stronger on the ups than the downs as she tried to retain buoyancy. Her fingers fluttered out, making invisible patterns in the water.
Her feet were close to his face, and he observed with subtle amusement as she wiggled her toes at him.
He didn’t dare speak. He didn’t know just what to say.
There were so many possibilities.
‘Get away from me.’ ‘Go.’ ‘Leave. You do it so well.’
‘You’re my disease.’
His heart ached.
‘I love you.’
‘Don’t leave me, Veronica. Not again.’
He felt the rumblings of a wave beneath him, a strong, vengeful undercurrent. His feet lifted in response. It traveled beneath him, over and out to the shore, and it tried to take Veronica with it.
In one swift movement, he reached out to grasp her tiny foot in his hand. As the current made its way out from under them, he pulled against it, kicking his legs with a prayer swirling in his head.
She didn’t fight him. She pulled her arms close to her body, streamlining his process. She lifted her head up and snuck a hopeful glance at him.
“No you don’t,” he uttered, pulling her closer.
“Don’t what?”
“Leave me. Don’t leave me.”
She raised her eyebrows with curiosity.
He attempted to recover. “I didn’t want you to wash away with the wave. The undertow, it could have…it would have pulled you under.”
“Uh huh.”
“And that…” he stuttered, “that-that would be unfortunate.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, because, I mean…who would solve Neptune’s trivial mysteries of the week? Surely not Weevil. What the kid’s got in moxy he lacks in smarts.” His embarrassment morphed into a sly grin.
She threw her head back in mock-laughter, then faced him with apparent seriousness. “What about you, Watson? You’ve gotten pretty good at this sleuthing stuff yourself.”
“Was that a compliment from Miss Veronica Mars, Super-Sleuth?” He feigned shock.
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t go that far…”
“Well, I would sleuth, Mars, but I’m thinking Papa Keith wouldn’t warm up to his new sidekick that easily.”
“Silly. Just because he starts cleaning his rifle when you’re name’s mentioned doesn’t mean he dislikes you.” She smiled sweetly at him.
Logan broke into easy, genuine laughter.
Veronica interrupted his reveling. “Ew. I’m getting pruney.” She was looking down at her fingers, and picked around the edges of her cuticles.
“Well, let’s get out then.” He hastily moved to swim towards shore.
“Um…okay.” He swore he could hear a tinge of disappointment in her voice.
They swam to shore. Logan let Veronica swim a little in front of him, and he watched to make sure she was safe and untouched. When they arrived to the beach, they noticed that Beaver and Dick had fallen asleep on their towels in the sand. Dick’s hand was perched on his chest, with Backup’s leash wrapped tightly around his wrist.
Logan bent down and untwined the leash, loosing Backup from Dick’s grip. Backup happily trotted to Logan and began licking the saltwater off his legs. Logan laughed and stooped down. “Hey, boy. Hey.” Backup began licking his face eagerly. “Guess you missed me.”
“Yeah.”
He looked up when Veronica spoke. She stood over him and Backup, casting a tiny sprite’s shadow over them.
She opened her mouth once more. “We did.”
Logan looked down at Backup and hugged the dog awkwardly. He could hear Backup’s happy pant, and he smiled.
“Right, Backup?” Veronica asked, crouching down before them.
Logan didn’t speak. He continued to pat Backup and pushed his nose against the dog’s soft head.
“Backup and I had a discussion earlier.” Logan peered up at her and nodded.
“Backup said, ‘V., I really miss that Logan guy. He’s the only boyfriend of yours that I ever liked.’” She patted Backup’s head. “And I said, ‘Well, the only reason you liked him was because he fed you his people-food scraps all the time.’” Logan grinned into the dog’s fur.
“But no, no, Backup was adamant. ‘Seriously, Veronica. I miss him.’ To which I reasonably replied, ‘Yeah, Backup, I miss him too. Even though he didn’t feed me scraps.’”
Logan snorted.
“And then Backup had the most brilliant idea he’s ever had. Ever. Want to know what he said?”
Logan looked at her and nodded. His eyes felt tired, and he could feel moisture forming along their edges.
“He said, ‘I have an idea, V. Let’s go find him. We’ll tell him we miss him and we love him, and we’ll promise that we’ll never leave him ever again. What do you think?’ And I was like, ‘Backup, you are the smartest dog I have ever met. Either that or Echolls table scraps are far superior to Mars table scraps.’”
Logan stared into the sand as his heart beat soundly against his chest. Tears slid down his face easily and he watched as they made wet dots in the sand.
“ ‘Table scraps, schmable scraps,’ Backup said to me. ‘You know what I miss more than Logan, Veronica?’ ‘What do you miss more, Backup?’ I asked. ‘I miss you being happy. Now, let’s go get him.’”
Logan felt Veronica’s hand under his chin again, and he looked up at her, his lower lip quivering.
“So. We did. Here we are.” She sighed. “Logan, Backup misses you. He loves you. He promises never to leave you ever again.”
Logan coughed, pulling away from her slightly. “I miss Backup, too.”
“Logan?”
“Yeah, V.?”
“I miss you. I love you. I promise, if you want me, if you want me to come back, I will. And I promise I will never leave you ever again.”
Logan nodded quietly.
“You know what? Fuck that.”
Logan’s heart sank again. She had the uncanny ability to send him on a whirlwind of emotions. What now?
“Excuse me?” he asked, imperceptibly.
“Whether you want me to come back or not, I’m here. I’m not leaving. You will have to forcibly remove me to get away from you. I need you. And I think - I think you need me, too.”
He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time since she’d swum out to him in the water. Her ocean-blue eyes shone against newly-pink skin. Her hair hung around her face in a knotted mess, but the sun shone through the blonde locks, tinging them with warm gold. Her skin was goosepimpled and he saw her shiver under the light breeze which weaved between them. He looked out to his side and saw his towel bunched in a ball beside Dick’s head. He reached out and shook the towel free from sand. Reaching forward, he beckoned her to come close, and he wrapped the towel around her, rubbing her cold skin with it. She turned towards him and leaned against his chest. “Logan. Say something.”
“Well,” he sighed, trying to sound exasperated, “I guess I’m stuck with you…and your little dog, too.”
“You’re stuck with me?!” She gasped, trying to push away from him. “Well, fine then.”
“Not so fast, Mars.” He pulled her tight against his body. “I’m stuck with you. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She peered up at him with an uncertain glare behind her eyes. “I’m keeping you to your promise.”
He felt good, solid, for once. He felt complete. She said all the right things, and she felt so good…she felt and smelled like his Veronica. His heart beat resounded in his chest, and he felt alive again.
She snuggled against him silently. He was thankful to have her so close.
He spoke again. “I have a promise to make myself.”
“Oh?”
He bent to whisper in her ear. Her eyes grew wide. “Oh really?! 5 in an hour, huh? I don’t know…” She lifted her face and looked at him. Love brimmed from her pores, and he felt it embrace him.
“You see,” he said seductively, dropping his head towards hers. “it’s not a challenge." He brushed his lips against hers, and she opened her mouth at his bidding. He spoke furtively, into her mouth, against her tongue. "It’s a promise.”
Her tongue darted out over her lips and against his, and he hugged her tighter as she strained against his height. He happily drank her in, moving his mouth slowly and surely against hers, pulling her lower lip softly between his teeth, pressing his fingers against the soft slope of her neck. He could feel her swallow as she pressed her tongue along the length of his. She pushed in, then pulled out, and kissed him quickly on the lips before speaking.
“Well then,” she said, breathily. “We’d best get to it then." She tugged at his hand as they broke apart. She started walking quickly toward the parking lot, slapping her leg at Backup to follow. "We’ve got promises to keep, and stat!”
Logan laughed heartily and jogged to catch up to her. Placing an arm around her shoulder, he breathed a happy sigh. “Mars…Veronica…I love you.”
“I know, silly. I know.”
--
END
Lyrics: (some)
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel, of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway
She was with another man
But I won't lose any sleep on that, 'cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful,
You're beautiful,
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face
In a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you.
Author: rubie_so_ho (Amanda)
Rating: R (suggestive phrase)
Word Count: 3,092
Pairing: Logan and Veronica, Logan POV, (cameos by Dick & Beaver)
Spoilers: Up to 2x14 (not even, but just to be sure)
Summary: Logan tries to deal with the possibility that he'll never get her back...
Disclaimer: All Rob's, boo.
Other Disclaimer: I got the title from "You're Beautiful," by James Blunt. Lyrics to follow at bottom.
A/N: I lurve feedback!
--
It’d been a week since Duncan left for Napa. The suite felt cold and empty, and Logan avoided staying there. He spent his days bumming around town with Dick and occasionally Beaver. The three of them would while their mornings away in the surf, until their backs and legs ached from over-activity. They spent their afternoons lounging on the beach, tanning their already-overexposed skin under the midday sun’s rays.
This day was no different than the rest. After surfing for a few hours and catching lunch from a nearby hot dog stand, the boys settled into the sand. Logan laid back with one arm resting beneath his head. He stared up into the cloudless sky as he felt the sand shift to accommodate his body. The salt from the ocean began to dry against his deeply-tanned skin, leaving him feeling grimy and brittle. He constantly rewetted his lips, licking them every few seconds, trying to escape the feeling that he was drying up into nothingness, about to become one with the sand below him.
Logan had been tired and muted the past few days, and he knew that it had not gone unnoticed by the brothers Casablancas. Despite their concern, they refrained from bothering him. They didn’t even appear to mind when he was noticeably silent during their daily brotherly bickerings. Logan knew that Dick had told Beaver about Fallout 2006, and was thankful that they were leaving him alone.
Alone. He felt as though he personified it.
He hadn’t heard from her since that day, that moment…when she’d walked into the living room, before he and Dick, her face flushed with embarrassment. She had hastily retreated, doing what she did best. Her avoidance of him felt familiar, like a worn-out old coat. She ran. He hated this quality of hers once, but now he was complacent.
He was convinced this was the way it would always be.
The waters would get rough, too difficult to navigate. And she would bail.
During the past days, as he lay baking in the sand beneath the hot midsummer sun, he had considered a life without her.
Her admission of love for him did not fool him. His heart had soared with joy at first, but he had been brought back down to earth with realization. She had only confessed her feelings after being backed into a corner, and only at Duncan’s behest.
So he allowed himself to ponder what moving on would feel like.
He’d never moved on, not ever. He’d gotten over Lilly when his lips first brushed against Veronica’s, but nothing ever cured him of his Veronica-hangover. When his hips would grind into Kendall’s, he thought of Veronica. When Hannah’s lithe body draped against his in a sweet embrace, he thought of Veronica. She permeated his very being. She never left, not really.
But she’d become a part of him, like a limb, an eye, an ear. He couldn’t really function without her. She was his crutch.
He needed to cut her out.
Her absence, her silence - made it clear to him that she wasn’t going to be his. Not again. Not ever.
Every so often, as he lay in the sand next to the boisterous Casablancases, he would open one eye and attempt to check out the beach beauties that passed before them. He would nod as Dick would whistle lewdly but appreciatively at the cute, tanned girls in their cute, expensive bikinis.
To no avail, however. No matter how pretty their faces, how sweet their curves, none of them rivaled her beauty in his mind’s eye.
It drove him insane.
On this day, he fidgeted. He felt uncomfortable, uneasy, insatiable. He felt more and more delicate under the drying sea salt, and itchy from the sand beneath him. His hair felt waxy and dirty. He tasted like salt and dirt. And he was restless. He was pissed, sad, and frustrated.
He wanted to purge himself. Purge himself of her.
And that is why, in the middle of the day, as Dick and Beaver discussed the pros and cons of women’s pierced tongues, he leapt up, screaming, and hurled himself into the ocean with all the force he could muster.
He plunged his body deep beneath the waves, wiggling his body like a dolphin would. The rocks and shells and debris on the ocean floor scraped his stomach, but he didn’t flinch. He dove deeper and deeper till he felt the pressure rising in his ears and his lungs. He stopped, and gave into life, gave into nature, gave into complacency. With a wry smile of surrender painted on his lips, he allowed the air in his lungs and his relative weightlessness to push him to the surface. As he rose, he screamed again, and when he broke the plane between water and sky, his screams sounded out against the mid-afternoon air, punctuated by heavy coughs and the beginnings of a sob.
She made him feel helpless. How could one person make another feel like this? Was it healthy? He bet that it wasn’t.
He turned in the water, treading in place. He choked on the brackish air around him, and breathed heavily to regain some composure.
Yards and yards away he could see Dick and Beaver on the edge of the water, shouting and waving their arms. He wasn’t far out enough to miss the look of confusion on Dick’s pretty-boy face, or the expression of pure fear on Beaver’s.
He sympathized with Beaver at that moment. He was scared, too.
He sucked in a long breath and dipped below the surface again. He opened up his eyes underwater, and it was dark. All he could see was bits of detritus floating through the water, fluttering against the rays of light piercing through the waves. He stared straight ahead. He felt so alone, so hurt.
Where had she been? He had been too afraid to call her, but he thought she’d have called him, or stopped by.
She’d left a few things about the suite. Occasionally he would find a hair tie, or a necklace, or a piece of paper she’d scribbled on. She was everywhere in the suite. Her scent tinged the stale air. The shower still smelled like her shampoo. It was funny to him. Duncan hadn’t left a trace of himself anywhere. But she was a constant.
He bobbed to the surface again, and looked out toward his friends. They were no longer shouting and screaming or flailing like idiots.
They were talking to their newly arrived visitor and her four-legged companion.
He placed his face in the water and blew bubbles for a long moment. Lifting his head just enough so his eyes peered out across the waves’ surface, he could see Dick and Beaver standing with their hands on their hips, shaking their respective heads and talking to the visitor.
She lifted her hand to shield her eyes as she looked out over the water. Logan felt like melting into the ocean.
He watched her from afar. She looked puzzled and concerned. Biting her lower lip, she appeared to make a decision, and she handed Dick Backup’s leash. Crossing her arms around her body, she lifted her shirt above her head and threw it on the ground. As she moved, Logan held his breath, only to see that she’d come prepared, bathing suit and all. She continued to look toward him as she kicked off her flip-flops and shorts in one sweeping motion.
Logan tread water cautiously, willing himself to stay in that spot. He fought against the current, kicking through the water as though he were walking backward.
She walked out to the water without hesitation, and he watched as her body was slowly enveloped by the waves, until all he saw was a shock of blonde hair against the dark turquoise of the sea. She lifted her arms over the water and swam slowly and methodically in his direction.
She stopped a foot in front of him and began to tread, too. She watched his arms and matched his rhythm.
“So. Whatcha doin’?” she intoned. Her breaths created little ripples in the water under her nose.
“Nothing.” He looked at the ripples, avoiding her eyes.
“Ah. I see.” She squinted at him. “So I guess ‘nothing’ includes running into the ocean, screaming at the top of your lungs, and scaring the bejesus out of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dick?”
“Yes, exactly that.”
“Mm-hmm.” She didn’t look satisfied. “Okay Logan, I’ll bite. What is up with you, anyway?”
“Blurbleblurblah,” he mumbled into the water.
“Ahem.” She lifted a finger out and tipped his chin up. “Repetez, s’il vous plait.”
“Oui, Mademoiselle Mars.” He laughed half-heartedly. “I don’t know. I just…felt like having a scream.”
“I don’t know what you’re selling, Echolls, but I ain’t buying.”
“Yeah, well, you wouldn’t.” He wasn’t sure what that meant, but he said it with defiance sharpening his tongue.
“Huh?” Yeah, his thoughts exactly. He had no idea what he was saying, or what to say.
“Where have you been, Veronica?” he felt his heart sink deeper into his chest, but summoned enough courage to finally look her in the eye.
“I’ve been…busy.” It was her turn to avoid eye contact. She leaned her head back, wetting her hair up to her forehead.
“Busy…not talking to me?”
She whipped her head forward, a shocked expression gracing her features. “You’re one to talk!”
He gave her a look of ‘Who? Me?’
“Yes, you. You,” she reached forward a finger to poke him in the chest, “could have called me, you know.”
“I’m not sure there’s anything for us to talk about, Veronica,” he breathed out bitterly. He reached up a hand to caress the spot she’d poked. He thought he felt an indentation above his heart.
“Oh.”
They stared at each other, treading water in time. Veronica looked up at the sky, tipping her head back again. She stretched her arms out to her side, and stroked them through the water in one, strong movement until she was further away from him, and that much closer to the shore. Her tiny feet and legs followed until they were stretched out in front of her.
Logan watched silently as she floated in front of him. Her body bobbed against the light surf. Her chest heaved up and down, her breaths stronger on the ups than the downs as she tried to retain buoyancy. Her fingers fluttered out, making invisible patterns in the water.
Her feet were close to his face, and he observed with subtle amusement as she wiggled her toes at him.
He didn’t dare speak. He didn’t know just what to say.
There were so many possibilities.
‘Get away from me.’ ‘Go.’ ‘Leave. You do it so well.’
‘You’re my disease.’
His heart ached.
‘I love you.’
‘Don’t leave me, Veronica. Not again.’
He felt the rumblings of a wave beneath him, a strong, vengeful undercurrent. His feet lifted in response. It traveled beneath him, over and out to the shore, and it tried to take Veronica with it.
In one swift movement, he reached out to grasp her tiny foot in his hand. As the current made its way out from under them, he pulled against it, kicking his legs with a prayer swirling in his head.
She didn’t fight him. She pulled her arms close to her body, streamlining his process. She lifted her head up and snuck a hopeful glance at him.
“No you don’t,” he uttered, pulling her closer.
“Don’t what?”
“Leave me. Don’t leave me.”
She raised her eyebrows with curiosity.
He attempted to recover. “I didn’t want you to wash away with the wave. The undertow, it could have…it would have pulled you under.”
“Uh huh.”
“And that…” he stuttered, “that-that would be unfortunate.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, because, I mean…who would solve Neptune’s trivial mysteries of the week? Surely not Weevil. What the kid’s got in moxy he lacks in smarts.” His embarrassment morphed into a sly grin.
She threw her head back in mock-laughter, then faced him with apparent seriousness. “What about you, Watson? You’ve gotten pretty good at this sleuthing stuff yourself.”
“Was that a compliment from Miss Veronica Mars, Super-Sleuth?” He feigned shock.
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t go that far…”
“Well, I would sleuth, Mars, but I’m thinking Papa Keith wouldn’t warm up to his new sidekick that easily.”
“Silly. Just because he starts cleaning his rifle when you’re name’s mentioned doesn’t mean he dislikes you.” She smiled sweetly at him.
Logan broke into easy, genuine laughter.
Veronica interrupted his reveling. “Ew. I’m getting pruney.” She was looking down at her fingers, and picked around the edges of her cuticles.
“Well, let’s get out then.” He hastily moved to swim towards shore.
“Um…okay.” He swore he could hear a tinge of disappointment in her voice.
They swam to shore. Logan let Veronica swim a little in front of him, and he watched to make sure she was safe and untouched. When they arrived to the beach, they noticed that Beaver and Dick had fallen asleep on their towels in the sand. Dick’s hand was perched on his chest, with Backup’s leash wrapped tightly around his wrist.
Logan bent down and untwined the leash, loosing Backup from Dick’s grip. Backup happily trotted to Logan and began licking the saltwater off his legs. Logan laughed and stooped down. “Hey, boy. Hey.” Backup began licking his face eagerly. “Guess you missed me.”
“Yeah.”
He looked up when Veronica spoke. She stood over him and Backup, casting a tiny sprite’s shadow over them.
She opened her mouth once more. “We did.”
Logan looked down at Backup and hugged the dog awkwardly. He could hear Backup’s happy pant, and he smiled.
“Right, Backup?” Veronica asked, crouching down before them.
Logan didn’t speak. He continued to pat Backup and pushed his nose against the dog’s soft head.
“Backup and I had a discussion earlier.” Logan peered up at her and nodded.
“Backup said, ‘V., I really miss that Logan guy. He’s the only boyfriend of yours that I ever liked.’” She patted Backup’s head. “And I said, ‘Well, the only reason you liked him was because he fed you his people-food scraps all the time.’” Logan grinned into the dog’s fur.
“But no, no, Backup was adamant. ‘Seriously, Veronica. I miss him.’ To which I reasonably replied, ‘Yeah, Backup, I miss him too. Even though he didn’t feed me scraps.’”
Logan snorted.
“And then Backup had the most brilliant idea he’s ever had. Ever. Want to know what he said?”
Logan looked at her and nodded. His eyes felt tired, and he could feel moisture forming along their edges.
“He said, ‘I have an idea, V. Let’s go find him. We’ll tell him we miss him and we love him, and we’ll promise that we’ll never leave him ever again. What do you think?’ And I was like, ‘Backup, you are the smartest dog I have ever met. Either that or Echolls table scraps are far superior to Mars table scraps.’”
Logan stared into the sand as his heart beat soundly against his chest. Tears slid down his face easily and he watched as they made wet dots in the sand.
“ ‘Table scraps, schmable scraps,’ Backup said to me. ‘You know what I miss more than Logan, Veronica?’ ‘What do you miss more, Backup?’ I asked. ‘I miss you being happy. Now, let’s go get him.’”
Logan felt Veronica’s hand under his chin again, and he looked up at her, his lower lip quivering.
“So. We did. Here we are.” She sighed. “Logan, Backup misses you. He loves you. He promises never to leave you ever again.”
Logan coughed, pulling away from her slightly. “I miss Backup, too.”
“Logan?”
“Yeah, V.?”
“I miss you. I love you. I promise, if you want me, if you want me to come back, I will. And I promise I will never leave you ever again.”
Logan nodded quietly.
“You know what? Fuck that.”
Logan’s heart sank again. She had the uncanny ability to send him on a whirlwind of emotions. What now?
“Excuse me?” he asked, imperceptibly.
“Whether you want me to come back or not, I’m here. I’m not leaving. You will have to forcibly remove me to get away from you. I need you. And I think - I think you need me, too.”
He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time since she’d swum out to him in the water. Her ocean-blue eyes shone against newly-pink skin. Her hair hung around her face in a knotted mess, but the sun shone through the blonde locks, tinging them with warm gold. Her skin was goosepimpled and he saw her shiver under the light breeze which weaved between them. He looked out to his side and saw his towel bunched in a ball beside Dick’s head. He reached out and shook the towel free from sand. Reaching forward, he beckoned her to come close, and he wrapped the towel around her, rubbing her cold skin with it. She turned towards him and leaned against his chest. “Logan. Say something.”
“Well,” he sighed, trying to sound exasperated, “I guess I’m stuck with you…and your little dog, too.”
“You’re stuck with me?!” She gasped, trying to push away from him. “Well, fine then.”
“Not so fast, Mars.” He pulled her tight against his body. “I’m stuck with you. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She peered up at him with an uncertain glare behind her eyes. “I’m keeping you to your promise.”
He felt good, solid, for once. He felt complete. She said all the right things, and she felt so good…she felt and smelled like his Veronica. His heart beat resounded in his chest, and he felt alive again.
She snuggled against him silently. He was thankful to have her so close.
He spoke again. “I have a promise to make myself.”
“Oh?”
He bent to whisper in her ear. Her eyes grew wide. “Oh really?! 5 in an hour, huh? I don’t know…” She lifted her face and looked at him. Love brimmed from her pores, and he felt it embrace him.
“You see,” he said seductively, dropping his head towards hers. “it’s not a challenge." He brushed his lips against hers, and she opened her mouth at his bidding. He spoke furtively, into her mouth, against her tongue. "It’s a promise.”
Her tongue darted out over her lips and against his, and he hugged her tighter as she strained against his height. He happily drank her in, moving his mouth slowly and surely against hers, pulling her lower lip softly between his teeth, pressing his fingers against the soft slope of her neck. He could feel her swallow as she pressed her tongue along the length of his. She pushed in, then pulled out, and kissed him quickly on the lips before speaking.
“Well then,” she said, breathily. “We’d best get to it then." She tugged at his hand as they broke apart. She started walking quickly toward the parking lot, slapping her leg at Backup to follow. "We’ve got promises to keep, and stat!”
Logan laughed heartily and jogged to catch up to her. Placing an arm around her shoulder, he breathed a happy sigh. “Mars…Veronica…I love you.”
“I know, silly. I know.”
--
END
Lyrics: (some)
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel, of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway
She was with another man
But I won't lose any sleep on that, 'cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful,
You're beautiful,
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face
In a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you.