Here we go.
Sam this is for you.
Today a parcel arrived for me in Jasper, I was not there to get it (but I will be tomorrow!!) It comes from Ottawa, it comes from you. My Mum told me and then that ended up being a really long conversation about how she was going to file a complaint with the post office, because we haven't had mail for 4 days, which is odd, because normally we get at least one thing every day and she ramble for a while. I like it when she's mad at the world, it's kind of funny.
I don't want to move home. Living at rural route # God knows what, was not my plan for the next six months, I hate living at home. It makes me feel so childish. Just walking back into the fucking role, that god damn inferior role where I am not an adult and I have rules again. Also I hate my step dad, mainly because he is a verbally abusive asshole, but only when he thinks no one is listening. Also because he's just a general idiot and even if he did speak to me we have nothing in common. I can't however voice any of this to my mother, because she loves him. Even typing those last few sentences makes me feel like a teen angst asshole, which is not good, I feel like I've come past that. Argh.
It makes me sad, because Stephen and I wont be living together anymore and we've gotten into this really good pattern that works.
I also have no car or job.
I do not want to work at Wal-Mart. I do not want to work at a minimum wage joint. I would like something intellectually challenging. Not that there is anything wrong with people who work at Wal-mart and the like, I just would prefer something else.
I just feel like everything I've been working for has been pissed on and then some fucker kicks me in the face and laughs and sets my hair on fire.
I'm never happy anymore. I hate it.
I just don't know what to do...
Today a parcel arrived for me in Jasper, I was not there to get it (but I will be tomorrow!!) It comes from Ottawa, it comes from you. My Mum told me and then that ended up being a really long conversation about how she was going to file a complaint with the post office, because we haven't had mail for 4 days, which is odd, because normally we get at least one thing every day and she ramble for a while. I like it when she's mad at the world, it's kind of funny.
I don't want to move home. Living at rural route # God knows what, was not my plan for the next six months, I hate living at home. It makes me feel so childish. Just walking back into the fucking role, that god damn inferior role where I am not an adult and I have rules again. Also I hate my step dad, mainly because he is a verbally abusive asshole, but only when he thinks no one is listening. Also because he's just a general idiot and even if he did speak to me we have nothing in common. I can't however voice any of this to my mother, because she loves him. Even typing those last few sentences makes me feel like a teen angst asshole, which is not good, I feel like I've come past that. Argh.
It makes me sad, because Stephen and I wont be living together anymore and we've gotten into this really good pattern that works.
I also have no car or job.
I do not want to work at Wal-Mart. I do not want to work at a minimum wage joint. I would like something intellectually challenging. Not that there is anything wrong with people who work at Wal-mart and the like, I just would prefer something else.
I just feel like everything I've been working for has been pissed on and then some fucker kicks me in the face and laughs and sets my hair on fire.
I'm never happy anymore. I hate it.
I just don't know what to do...