pendulum

[faeriemaiden]

so far the nights are very long
and very coldandstillandstopped and she thinks

she doesn’t think anything now.

(she was two, three, and she had
a watch which was her father’s, and she liked
to hear it tickticktick against her ear

and it was a tuesday, and it was cold
and it was february and she had on yellow shoes
and the laces were too long and she fell
and she always remembered the look
of the linoleum in the kitchen, and the glass
            oh those shards of time
and the minute hand, crooked-angled

so this was how time stopped

now she is her father’s watch
and now she is the scattering of a thing that was whole)

in the dark she lies without candles
(darkdarkdark they all go into the dark)
in the morning she shuts the blinds and shuts her eyes and shuts and shuts and shuts
and shuts away.

(she said, “the stars are very bright tonight” and when
he kissed her the space inside of her head was full of stars

do stars go out?)

someone says, cry, it’ll do you some good
but she doesn’t cry. there is a fire
somewhere burning burning.

(but i do love you.

don’t you? don’t you?)

she does. she does.