Comments | rt_challenge: Fascinated (prompt 13)

shimotsuki in rt_challenge

Fascinated (prompt 13)

Jan 13, 2007 18:57

Title: Fascinated
Author: shimotsuki
Format & Word Count: Double drabble, 229 words
Rating: G
Prompt: #13, first person/present tense
Author's note: I hope this attempt at a loose, colloquial style doesn't sound too terribly American. Brit-picking and other concrit is most welcome.
Summary: Tonks is mostly paying attention during her first Order meeting.

( Fascinated )

prompt 13, shimotsuki

Comments 22

twerksie January 14 2007, 00:40:49 UTC

;o; Honestly, that was awesome. :) Thanks for brightening up my day. ;D

shimotsuki January 14 2007, 00:44:28 UTC

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

annabtg January 14 2007, 00:51:18 UTC

Nice one! :)

See ya,
Anna.

shimotsuki January 15 2007, 15:22:19 UTC

Thanks for the comment!

lady_bracknell January 14 2007, 00:53:30 UTC

I really liked this. Tonks' internal monolgue is absolutely spot on, and I loved your descriptions of Remus, the contrast between him the Order member everyone turns and listens to, and the man with the devilish glint in his eye. I don't blame Tonks for wanting to get to know him better ;).

shimotsuki January 15 2007, 16:16:46 UTC

Thanks for the feedback -- I wanted to show why Remus might look like an interesting, complex character on first acquaintance, and I'm glad you thought it worked.

devonwood January 14 2007, 02:38:01 UTC

I love Tonks's train of thought; how she starts out generally listening and thinking about Order work, and then she gets distracted by Remus. Great last line, too.

Lovely use of prompt.

shimotsuki January 15 2007, 16:18:04 UTC

Well, maybe not entirely distracted. Hee. We've gotta give her some credit for being a competent Auror, after all... Glad you liked it, and thanks.

hrhbunbury January 14 2007, 14:56:44 UTC

This should be used as the perfect reply to any naysayer wondering what a girl like Tonks sees in Remus.

Very nice and spot on to Tonks, who I can imagine would try really hard to be serious, but with tendancies toward the wandering eye. :)

shimotsuki January 15 2007, 16:27:42 UTC

This should be used as the perfect reply to any naysayer wondering what a girl like Tonks sees in Remus -- I'm delighted to hear that you found this scenario plausible! One of the reasons why I find the Remus and Tonks relationship so interesting is because they seem so different on the surface, but, I think, each also resonates with a more hidden aspect of the other's personality.