Prompt 5
Title: “Yielding”
Author: mercutio_rane
Prompt: #5, yellow light
Format & Word Count: dialogue drabble, 556 words
Rating: G
Summary: In the very early days of OotP, Remus and Tonks borrow Arthur’s car to run some errands for the Order.
Warning: horrible crack!fic with blatant Star Wars dialogue theft *looking sheepish*
Author’s Note: They’re totally OOC and badly written! Oh God, the pain! The pointlessness! No harm meant to either character, you know I love ‘em. But I can feel the flames a’comin’!
Remus, don’t g-…ahhhhhhHH!
(Tonks cringes in her seat as two cars nearly T-bone them from both sides and squeal away, their honks trailing)
REMUS!
“What?”
You just ran that red light!
“I did?”
YES!
“……Isn’t the green light on the top?”
What do you mean ‘green light on the top!’ It’s green on the bottom, red on the top!
“Ah. Well, I can’t see the colors, but I can tell which one is lit.”
Whaddayou…..are you color blind?
“Just reds and greens.”
Remus Lupin, you’re a colorblind werewolf?
(He stiffens a bit in the seat and blinks.)
“Who told you I was a werewolf?”
Please….You don’t remember your first words to me ever? Last week?
“My first words…”
(Tonks tries on a low, sultry voice)
Love, I can smell your pheromones from here, and they’re sending me wonderfully hopeful signals.
(Remus immediately turns beet red.)
And then you growled.
“I didn’t…”
You did.
“….Merlin…..(clears throat)…Well, Sirius and I had been drinking for several hours when you arrived. We had a lot to catch up on, I’m afraid.”
You’re a nice guy and all, but don’t ever lick my face again….(she smiles) At least until I get to know you better.
“….I imagine it’s too late to apologize.”
I didn’t ask for an apology.
(He stares at her longingly, ignoring the road.)
REMUS!
(Startled, he looks forward just in time to fishtail fullspeed through a right turn.)
Merlin, Remus, you’re too bloody dangerous! Where’d you learn to drive, anyway!
“Muggle movies.”
And where’d you learn that, Bourne Identity?
“I’m much older than you, Nymphadora. Much MUCH older… .It was The French Connection. The original one…from the late 70’s when you were just a baby and I was old enough to have sex. What are those flashing grey and white lights behind us?”
Oh, God! You should have let me drive! Just…just look calm. He’s going to want an ID, can you conjure one?
“Don’t worry.”
Good afternoon, sir.
“Afternoon.”
Sir, I pulled you over because you were driving 50 mph in a 30 mph zone, and then you fishtailed through a corner at breakneck speed. Quite smoothly but without signaling, I might add. May I see your license, please?
“Of course.”
(Remus immediately offers him a card from his wallet.)
This says “Werewolf Registry Identification.”
“On second thought….you don’t need to see any identification.”
I don’t need to see any identification.
"We can go about our business."
You can go about your business.
"Move along."
Move along! Move along!
(The policeman shoos them off and heads back to his car. Remus watches him walk away then puts the card back in his wallet and leans forward to stick it in his back pocket with a relieved laugh.)
“Whew!”
(He pulls out into the traffic again, but Tonks is looking at him hard)
“What?”
I think we should just park the car and walk….Only you can’t cross the street without holding my hand.
“Holding your hand…”
Crosswalk lights…colors and such.
“But the crosswalks have symbols here in London.”
Well, too bad. You’ll just have to hold my hand anyway.
(Remus tries on a cautious smile as the light turns red. He stops at this one.)
“Nymphadora….Are those pheromones I smell?”
I hope so.
(They look at each other longingly, leaning forward and kissing thoroughly as the light turns green, people honking in a frantic row behind them until the car flies away, lifted by the strong magic of love in the air.)
The End (I Swear!)