Shadow of a Doubt - Chapter 4 [END]
[C]Shadow of a Doubt
Rating: M
Genre: AU/Angst(ish)/Romance
Length: Mini-series (4/4)
Pairing(s): Yemin
Summary: Patience can only last so long.
There was a soft vibration in Yesung's pocket. Reaching into it, he pulled out his brand new cell phone; the one Sungmin gave him that morning to ensure he had direct and immediate access to the older man. “Yes, Sungmin-sshi?” Yesung asked, taking in a deep breath while holding up a finger to some men around him.
“Do you mind coming to pick me up from classes in a little bit?” Sungmin asked hopefully.
The men crossed their arms over their chest, lifting their brows at Yesung as they exchanged glances. “I'm a little busy right now, maybe it's best if you just went home al-”
“What are you doing?” Sungmin interrupted.
The men tapped their feet impatiently.
“How long till your classes are over?” Yesung asked, somewhat defeated.
Sungmin bit his cheek. “Another hour or so.”
Yesung glanced at the clock on the wall parallel to him. “I got it, I'll make sure to be there on time. See you then,” he said before sliding his cellular close.
“Alright, let's cut to the chase,” one of the men demanded, “it's a one time thing, Yesung, we swear. Just once, just this once. It will definitely be successful if you help us; you've got brains, Yesung, you'll be the mastermind.”
Sighing inwardly, Yesung scratched the back of his neck before replying. “I'll agree to it if the three of you promise not to ever search me out again; let me go and never come after me. We're friends, I acknowledge that, but if I want to keep him safe I can't continue meddling with you guys.”
Seeing the unwillingness of the men to comply to his request brought a smile to his face, having forgotten what friendship truly meant during his short coma after being saved by these guys that one night a little over two months ago.
“Not even e-mailing?” one of the other men asked, slightly disheartened.
Yesung laughed. “Fine, I'll allow e-mailing.”
“Alright,” the one in charge declared, returning Yesung's smile, “it's a deal then.”
“Deal,” Yesung nodded, engaging them in the last handshake that would forever break their ties. Their acquaintance was short, yes, but an enjoyable one. After all, the best relationships are the ones that have no strings attached; no pressure and no worries.
-
His eyes looked like glass; they were watery, glowing, beautiful but so easily shattered. They were narrow, dangerously dark, hinting, yearning, aching, almost speaking - no, shouting out to its beholder. Just as those thoughts slipped into Sungmin's mind, Yesung's orbs immediately darted towards him, as if sensing his presence.
“Late,” Yesung accused, unfolding his arms and opening the door for Sungmin.
Sungmin bowed sheepishly, tucking his backpack onto the seat as he lowered himself in. “Sorry, my friends and classmates brought up some festival and they just kept talking and I couldn't squiggle my way out of the conversation with being rude and then I got involved and I somehow lost track of time,” Sungmin rambled, on and on, but it didn't annoy Yesung. It felt good having someone explain - no, try to explain - why they've made him wait.
“Are you done?” Yesung suddenly interrupted, staring at him through the rear view mirror.
It took a five count before Sungmin nodded with a blank expression.
Yesung laughed. “I'll drop you off at your house; I have to take an early leave tonight and I wont be back for two days or so.”
“Who died and made you boss?” Sungmin pursed his lips, interlocking his fingers in his lap as he glared back into the mirror at Yesung.
“Obviously not you,” Yesung shrugged, “but I need this Sungmin, just these three days; not even, it will only be a little over two nights.”
Sungmin turned his head out the window, refusing to reply.
“I don't make promises, Sungmin,” Yesung sighed, his fingers tightening on the steering wheel, “but I assure you that I'll be back, on time, just like today. I might be busy, I might have things I must attend to, but I'll always make time for you. I'll always come back.”
“I can't have first place?” Sungmin asked, out of the blue.
Yesung blinked, peering briefly into the rear view mirror. “What?”
Furrowing his brows, Sungmin lowered his eyes to the back of Yesung's seat. He struggled to find the rest of his question, the rest of the words to the questions he couldn't understand the reason he felt the need to ask. “Can't I be on top of your list of priorities? Why do I have to be last? Why do I have to be the place you return to instead of the place you run after at full speed; the place you're going?”
“Simple,” Yesung replied curtly, after a moment of silence, “because the places I am willing to go back to are few and, unfortunately, they are the only places I can call home.”
“Home?” Sungmin repeated. “Does that make us family?”
There were no further replies, the rest of the ride was in complete and utter silence; only the roaring of the engine and the screech of the tires on the rough grounds audible to the ears. Even so, Sungmin felt reassured, despite the clenching of his chest; an omen of some sort, perhaps, that he didn't recognize.
A bad feeling.
-
“What's so good about that place, anyways?” A brusque man asked as he strode along Yesung's side.
Yesung slipped his fingers into his black leather gloves, fastening them tight against his skin. He glanced up at the larger man, re-evaluating the man's value to him as a friend, and he shook his head. “You wouldn't understand.”
“How do you expect me to if you don't explain?” The man retorted.
The urge to kick that man became more apparent, but Yesung resisted. He wondered how he hasn't grown used to this man's obliviousness after spending two months with him, almost daily, but figured it wasn't worth the waste of his brain cells. “I don't expect you to understand.”
“But I want to,” the man insisted.
Yesung sighed. “Someone I want to stay by is there.”
“A weakness,” the man muttered, “a typical weakness.”
“I know,” Yesung smiled weakly, “but, hey, everyone has a weakness, right? So, I should be allowed one. Just one.”
The man nodded. “What's this person like?”
“He's-,” Yesung caught his tongue. He glanced over at his friend, who chuckled at his reaction to the slip of his own tongue.
“It's alright, we don't discriminate,” the man encouraged, patting Yesung on the shoulder.
Yesung shook his off. “He's a sweet guy; very popular, nice, lively, attention craving, considerate, he never gives up - not on me, at least - and he gives me a sense of security. I want to protect him; his beauty, his kindness, his longing for my attention, it makes me feel alive.”
“It makes you feel wanted, existing,” the man offered.
Flipping the hair out of his face as he stretched his arms over his head, Yesung agreed. “Yeah, something like that.”
“Do you know what you're risking, Yesung?” His friend asked, throwing him a weary look. “If we get caught, or if this ransack turns out for the worst, do you know what you're going to lose?”
Yesung lowered his eyes, staring at his hands. “You know why we have hands? We have hands to carve out our own future, to grasp onto our successes and push away our failures. We have hands to defend ourselves, to work, to survive. Of all the things in this world, I know best how to survive.”
“I don't doubt it,” his friend laughed.
Yesung shook his head, his eyes firm on his friend. “Don't. Never, ever, doubt me when it comes to survival. I'll do whatever it takes, as long as I reach my goal.”
The man felt a cold current run down his spine, the glare in Yesung's eyes more than just frightening. They started forward, just a few more steps till the reach their designated destination, just a few more minutes until they can get their hands on the goods.
His friend paused, holding him back by the shoulder. “I've never doubted your capabilities, Yesung. You're a smart man, a genius for loots, but I don't want you to have regrets.”
“I've already had too many regrets,” Yesung forced a laugh, shoving his friends hand away, “I won't allow myself any more.”
-
“I swear to God if he isn't back by tonight I'm throwing the largest search party in history and once I get my hands on him, he better pray to the Gods that I don't, I'll have him on his knees and squirming for mercy, the mercy that I won't give him!”
Eunhyuk leaned back against the trunk of the tree, nodding away at Sungmin's endless ranting.
“You've been saying similar things the past two days,” Zhoumi yawned, “don't you get tired of saying it? We get tired of hearing it.”
Donghae nodded in agreement. “He promised you, didn't he? He'll be back for sure.”
“If he came back last time, he's bound to come back again this time,” Eunhyuk absentmindedly contributed to the conversation.
Sungmin frowned. “He better.”
“You just get more and more attached to him over time, don't you?” Donghae asked, nuzzling himself against Eunhyuk by the tree. “This isn't healthy; you should just pay more attention to yourself. You're skipping meals and neglecting other people because of him!”
“Am not,” Sungmin muttered weakly.
Eunhyuk laughed bitterly. “You can't even speak properly.”
“I can, too!” Sungmin countered. “Argh! Can't you all ease my suffering instead of adding to it? I really don't need anything to be added to my fire!”
Zhoumi shook his head. “Well, the fire can die down soon. I just got a text message from my cousin Hangeng; he says Yesung was just with him but he won't be here to pick you up after school today.”
“I don't like the expression you're wearing,” Donghae narrowed his eyes.
“Of course, there's always a twist,” Zhoumi chuckled.
Eunhyuk sat up. “A missing arm? Maybe a leg? Or is it his head?”
“Not funny,” Sungmin pouted.
“It would be if you didn't have such a long face,” Eunhyuk retorted. “Okay then, Mimi, what's the dilemma?”
Zhoumi shrugged. “I just wanted to mess with Donghae. What could possibly be wrong with him? He's a full grown adult that left for a few days to deal with some business-”
“Shady business,” Eunhyuk corrected.
“Fine,” Zhoumi rolled his eyes, “shady business. It's unlikely that he'd really lose an arm or a leg over it.”
Donghae stretched. “And this is why we never listen to, or ask for, Zhoumi's advice.”
“Agreed,” Eunhyuk nodded.
Sungmin slumped his shoulders, throwing himself back into the grass. He could only hope for the day to hurry and end, a hundred times faster, so he could see Yesung and make sure he really was fine.
When it came to Yesung, he just couldn't be too sure.
-
The first thing Sungmin did when he got home that afternoon was run towards Yesung's room. He didn't even stop to greet his mother, who called out to him after he rushed through the kitchen, while he was on his way.
His eyes were red; not because he was on the verge of tears, not because he was angry, but because he passionately hoped that Yesung would be back by now.
To his dismay, Yesung was not in his room.
“Where is he?!” Sungmin scowled to himself, throwing his backpack to the ground.
His mother peered in through the doors, witnessing her son pacing around the room in a nervous wreck. “He's-”
“Not here,” Sungmin interrupted, “I know.”
She shook her head with a small smile. “If you-”
“I've tried calling him, he hasn't picked up.”
“Will you just-”
“Mom, I'm not in the mood right now,” Sungmin growled.
Mrs. Lee rose a brow, clapping her hands together. “I was going to tell you that if you went to your own room, there's a big surprise waiting for you. Apparently, trying to be nice doesn't pay when it comes to your own children.”
“I don't want a present,” Sungmin grumbled, not getting the hint.
“Fine then,” Mrs. Lee said, giving up on her son, “I thought you were brighter than that, but I guess not. Giving birth to BBQ would be better than you, at least I could eat it! All I can do with you is let you push me around and-”
Sungmin sighed. “Mother, I'm sorry, that's not what I meant.”
“Yeah, sure,” his mom groaned, “I'll be in the kitchen if you need me; don't.”
Feeling guilty for his poor attitude, Sungmin picked up his bag from the ground and moped down the hall to his own room. After throwing the door open, he threw his backpack to the side and headed straight for his dresser.
Routines; he hated them. This was his daily routine: wake up, wash and clean, breakfast, school, change and study, dinner, and sleep. The only thing that went out of routine in his life was Yesung; Yesung and the game that brought them together.
“I'd love to watch you finish your show for me,” a voice coughed from behind Sungmin, “but I don't think that's good work etiquette and I'm not intent on getting fired just yet.”
Sungmin, with his shirt half way over his head, lowered his arms and faced the man laying on his bed. “Yesung? What are you doing here?”
“I said I'd be back, didn't I?”
“I meant what are you doing in my room?!” Sungmin clarified.
Yesung laughed. “I was standing outside your room, waiting for you to come home, but your mom told me to sit inside. I got tired, so, I took a seat on your bed.”
“And I assume you fell asleep?” Sungmin added.
There was a brisk nod from the older man. “Sorry, I know I must have missed quite a few of your calls.”
Relief rushed over Sungmin. He absorbed Yesung's entire being, from head to toe, making sure he was healthy and uninjured; the last thing he needed right now was for Yesung to really be missing an arm or a leg. “You should be,” Sungmin pursed his lips, pulling his shirt down over his torso, “I was worried sick about you.”
“I'm sorry,” Yesung repeated, yawning. He then realized he was still sitting in Sungmin's bed and was about to hop out of it, but Sungmin had already reached his side and motioned for him to stay put.
Sungmin held a hand over Yesung's, his foxy eyes staring intently into the older man's glass-like ones. “You're going to stay this time, right? You're not going to leave anymore?”
“I'm pretty sure that's not what I sai-”
“I don't care what you said,” Sungmin interjected, “I want you to tell me right now.”
Yesung smiled, shaking his head lightly. “I can't promise you anything, Sungmin, but I can reassure you that I will always, always, stay by your side.”
“What's the difference?” Sungmin asked.
It was a question that was hard for Yesung to explain. Yesung lifted a hand to Sungmin's cheek, cradling it in his palm. “What's the difference from being the place I return to and being a place I run after?”
“You-”
“My reply is the same,” Yesung smiled warmly, the first affectionate smile Sungmin saw from the older man, “a promise is just words, an empty shell, something that can be broken. Reassurance, however, if proof that I'm willing to keep my word.”
Yesung released Sungmin and tried to inch himself off of the bed. Sungmin held him in place, pushing him back against the bed so he was laying down and leaning close to his face. “You said it yourself,” Sungmin confirmed once again, “you'll always be with me, me, right?”
“Sungmin, do you know what your problem is?” Yesung asked, locking his hands underneath his head as he smirked up at Sungmin. Sungmin pulled away slightly, peering into Yesung's eyes as he shook his head. “You want to be my first, my foremost, my everything. Don't you know? What's important isn't being any man's first, but their last.”
Sungmin released his grip on Yesung and contemplated the matter seriously. Yesung sighed, hoping the younger man would just take his word for it.
When, after a few moments, there was no reaction, Yesung took it upon himself to garner a different type of reaction from the boy. He took Sungmin by the neck and pulled him down, forcing their lips to meet roughly.
There was no time for Sungmin to think, neither was there time for him to fight back, before he found himself lost in Yesung's touch, his lips, his warmth, his passion, and most importantly, his eyes. Those eyes Sungmin just couldn't resist.
As Sungmin slowly came back to reality, he thumped a fist hard against Yesung's chest. Yesung immediately released Sungmin again, coughing against the younger man's lips.
“What was that for?” Yesung asked, patting his chest.
Sungmin fought back a blush, “what was that for?!”
“What do you want from me, Sungmin? You want me to notice you, you want me to pay attention to you, you tell me things that one would tell the person they truly care for,” Yesung asked, “now that I'm giving you the attention you've been craving from me, you don't want it?”
“What's your problem?” Sungmin scolded, shoving Yesung lately. “Why are you acting so weird and forceful? You're not usually like this.”
Yesung sat up, straightening out his clothes. “You're right. I'm sorry, I should just go-”
“No!” Sungmin shouted, wrapping his fingers around Yesung's wrist. “Tell me, what's wrong? Did something happen? Why are you acting different? What's the problem?”
Flinging Sungmin's hand off, each finger of the boy's adding just that more heat to his already warming flesh, Yesung shifted himself to face Sungmin. “You. You're the problem, Sungmin. I don't know what else can be wrong, other than you being in my life now. Do you know where I went?”
Sungmin shook his head.
“I put my life on the line,” Yesung laughed bitterly, “but, you know, I don't think that matters as much as the fact that, while I was there, I couldn't care less about the lives of anyone else around me. You know why?”
Sungmin wove his fingers into Yesung's hand, giving it a small squeeze as he shook his head again.
Yesung lowered his eyes to their interlocked fingers, raising them to his chest. “Because the only thing I could think about was keeping myself alive so I could come back here; so I could come back to your side, just as I told you I would.”
“Yesung-” Sungmin paused, standing to his feet. “When did I become so important to you?”
“You tell me,” Yesung challenged.
Sungmin fastened his arms around Yesung's neck and pulled him in for a hug, hugging him tight against himself. “I'm sorry,” Sungmin whispered against Yesung's ear, “I'm sorry for bringing so much trouble to your life.”
Yesung shook his head, wrapping his arms around Sungmin's waist and nuzzling into the nape of Sungmin's neck.
Pulling away, Sungmin looked into Yesung's eyes. He felt himself being pulled in, drawn in, as their distance closed and their lips engaged intimately once again. Never had Sungmin felt this way before; the acute need for another man's touch, for another man's breath to mingle with his own, to have another man hold him with possession and passion.
Before either of them realized it, they were both stripped of their only physical preventions from accessing each others sensitivity. Their hands traveled across the smooth surfaces of the other's raw chest, Yesung's lips grazing over every inch of Sungmin's collar to his shoulders.
They were aching, their blood rushing to too many places at once.
Yesung hovered over Sungmin, his abdomen glued to the younger man's bare back, as he snaked an arm around his waist and clutched his side in a bruising grasp. Closer, all Yesung could think about was pulling Sungmin closer, harder, skin tight against his own flesh. There was something about the way Sungmin shook, shivered, tensed, moaned, and cried beneath him that drew Yesung's breath and hitched his desires.
Lust. Perhaps that's what drove him right now; if it was, it was doing a good job because he knew he was being driven insane by this lust, by Sungmin.
It hurt at first. Sungmin was surprised by the sharp pain, Yesung piercing through him slowly but roughly. He never imagined it could hurt so much.
Gripping his sheets and shoving his face into his pillow, trying to muffle his scream, Sungmin couldn't figure out what there was he could do to make the pain go away. Yesung bit down on his bottom lip, resting his forehead on the back of Sungmin shoulder, as he slid his hands on top of Sungmin's and held them tightly.
He didn't want to hurt the younger boy.
“It's okay,” Sungmin breathed heavily, reaching back and weaving his fingers into Yesung's hair, “I'm fine.”
Without further adieu, Yesung continued his ministrations until the subtle gasps of pain from the younger boy were of pleasure and satisfaction. Picking up his pace, as well as pressure, Yesung made the night an unforgettable one for the both of them.
“You're my first,” Sungmin whispered against Yesung's ear later that night.
Yesung stirred in the midst of his nap, throwing an arm over Sungmin and tugging him close. “You're my last,” Yesung replied, kissing Sungmin gently on his temple.
Sungmin smiled; this was probably the happiest he had ever been in his life.
Any doubt Sungmin had for Yesung vanished into thin air with those simple words. All the boy could think about was holding Yesung, holding onto the older man with his life, because Yesung never made promises, Yesung made reassurances.
Sungmin was sure, he was somehow so certain, that Yesung would hold on to him like he did today; with passion, with obsession, until the day they died.
Perhaps because Sungmin was all Yesung had now.
Until there was no room left for a shadow of a doubt that Sungmin was loved, loved by Yesung, this was a game they would keep playing. A game that lasts a lifetime.
-----
A/N: I totally forgot I planned for this to be rated M.. and because I've been writing so much for a certain someone lately, I really didn't include much of it, so, here it is. lol. I really suck at smut. Sorry. I know it's been forever since I last updated... I'm sure everyone knows the jazz; college sucks and I've been really, really sick. Anyhow, I hope you guys liked the ending! A bit abrupt, I know, but things never go the way I plan. =/ Till next time! <3
Rating: M
Genre: AU/Angst(ish)/Romance
Length: Mini-series (4/4)
Pairing(s): Yemin
Summary: Patience can only last so long.
There was a soft vibration in Yesung's pocket. Reaching into it, he pulled out his brand new cell phone; the one Sungmin gave him that morning to ensure he had direct and immediate access to the older man. “Yes, Sungmin-sshi?” Yesung asked, taking in a deep breath while holding up a finger to some men around him.
“Do you mind coming to pick me up from classes in a little bit?” Sungmin asked hopefully.
The men crossed their arms over their chest, lifting their brows at Yesung as they exchanged glances. “I'm a little busy right now, maybe it's best if you just went home al-”
“What are you doing?” Sungmin interrupted.
The men tapped their feet impatiently.
“How long till your classes are over?” Yesung asked, somewhat defeated.
Sungmin bit his cheek. “Another hour or so.”
Yesung glanced at the clock on the wall parallel to him. “I got it, I'll make sure to be there on time. See you then,” he said before sliding his cellular close.
“Alright, let's cut to the chase,” one of the men demanded, “it's a one time thing, Yesung, we swear. Just once, just this once. It will definitely be successful if you help us; you've got brains, Yesung, you'll be the mastermind.”
Sighing inwardly, Yesung scratched the back of his neck before replying. “I'll agree to it if the three of you promise not to ever search me out again; let me go and never come after me. We're friends, I acknowledge that, but if I want to keep him safe I can't continue meddling with you guys.”
Seeing the unwillingness of the men to comply to his request brought a smile to his face, having forgotten what friendship truly meant during his short coma after being saved by these guys that one night a little over two months ago.
“Not even e-mailing?” one of the other men asked, slightly disheartened.
Yesung laughed. “Fine, I'll allow e-mailing.”
“Alright,” the one in charge declared, returning Yesung's smile, “it's a deal then.”
“Deal,” Yesung nodded, engaging them in the last handshake that would forever break their ties. Their acquaintance was short, yes, but an enjoyable one. After all, the best relationships are the ones that have no strings attached; no pressure and no worries.
-
His eyes looked like glass; they were watery, glowing, beautiful but so easily shattered. They were narrow, dangerously dark, hinting, yearning, aching, almost speaking - no, shouting out to its beholder. Just as those thoughts slipped into Sungmin's mind, Yesung's orbs immediately darted towards him, as if sensing his presence.
“Late,” Yesung accused, unfolding his arms and opening the door for Sungmin.
Sungmin bowed sheepishly, tucking his backpack onto the seat as he lowered himself in. “Sorry, my friends and classmates brought up some festival and they just kept talking and I couldn't squiggle my way out of the conversation with being rude and then I got involved and I somehow lost track of time,” Sungmin rambled, on and on, but it didn't annoy Yesung. It felt good having someone explain - no, try to explain - why they've made him wait.
“Are you done?” Yesung suddenly interrupted, staring at him through the rear view mirror.
It took a five count before Sungmin nodded with a blank expression.
Yesung laughed. “I'll drop you off at your house; I have to take an early leave tonight and I wont be back for two days or so.”
“Who died and made you boss?” Sungmin pursed his lips, interlocking his fingers in his lap as he glared back into the mirror at Yesung.
“Obviously not you,” Yesung shrugged, “but I need this Sungmin, just these three days; not even, it will only be a little over two nights.”
Sungmin turned his head out the window, refusing to reply.
“I don't make promises, Sungmin,” Yesung sighed, his fingers tightening on the steering wheel, “but I assure you that I'll be back, on time, just like today. I might be busy, I might have things I must attend to, but I'll always make time for you. I'll always come back.”
“I can't have first place?” Sungmin asked, out of the blue.
Yesung blinked, peering briefly into the rear view mirror. “What?”
Furrowing his brows, Sungmin lowered his eyes to the back of Yesung's seat. He struggled to find the rest of his question, the rest of the words to the questions he couldn't understand the reason he felt the need to ask. “Can't I be on top of your list of priorities? Why do I have to be last? Why do I have to be the place you return to instead of the place you run after at full speed; the place you're going?”
“Simple,” Yesung replied curtly, after a moment of silence, “because the places I am willing to go back to are few and, unfortunately, they are the only places I can call home.”
“Home?” Sungmin repeated. “Does that make us family?”
There were no further replies, the rest of the ride was in complete and utter silence; only the roaring of the engine and the screech of the tires on the rough grounds audible to the ears. Even so, Sungmin felt reassured, despite the clenching of his chest; an omen of some sort, perhaps, that he didn't recognize.
A bad feeling.
-
“What's so good about that place, anyways?” A brusque man asked as he strode along Yesung's side.
Yesung slipped his fingers into his black leather gloves, fastening them tight against his skin. He glanced up at the larger man, re-evaluating the man's value to him as a friend, and he shook his head. “You wouldn't understand.”
“How do you expect me to if you don't explain?” The man retorted.
The urge to kick that man became more apparent, but Yesung resisted. He wondered how he hasn't grown used to this man's obliviousness after spending two months with him, almost daily, but figured it wasn't worth the waste of his brain cells. “I don't expect you to understand.”
“But I want to,” the man insisted.
Yesung sighed. “Someone I want to stay by is there.”
“A weakness,” the man muttered, “a typical weakness.”
“I know,” Yesung smiled weakly, “but, hey, everyone has a weakness, right? So, I should be allowed one. Just one.”
The man nodded. “What's this person like?”
“He's-,” Yesung caught his tongue. He glanced over at his friend, who chuckled at his reaction to the slip of his own tongue.
“It's alright, we don't discriminate,” the man encouraged, patting Yesung on the shoulder.
Yesung shook his off. “He's a sweet guy; very popular, nice, lively, attention craving, considerate, he never gives up - not on me, at least - and he gives me a sense of security. I want to protect him; his beauty, his kindness, his longing for my attention, it makes me feel alive.”
“It makes you feel wanted, existing,” the man offered.
Flipping the hair out of his face as he stretched his arms over his head, Yesung agreed. “Yeah, something like that.”
“Do you know what you're risking, Yesung?” His friend asked, throwing him a weary look. “If we get caught, or if this ransack turns out for the worst, do you know what you're going to lose?”
Yesung lowered his eyes, staring at his hands. “You know why we have hands? We have hands to carve out our own future, to grasp onto our successes and push away our failures. We have hands to defend ourselves, to work, to survive. Of all the things in this world, I know best how to survive.”
“I don't doubt it,” his friend laughed.
Yesung shook his head, his eyes firm on his friend. “Don't. Never, ever, doubt me when it comes to survival. I'll do whatever it takes, as long as I reach my goal.”
The man felt a cold current run down his spine, the glare in Yesung's eyes more than just frightening. They started forward, just a few more steps till the reach their designated destination, just a few more minutes until they can get their hands on the goods.
His friend paused, holding him back by the shoulder. “I've never doubted your capabilities, Yesung. You're a smart man, a genius for loots, but I don't want you to have regrets.”
“I've already had too many regrets,” Yesung forced a laugh, shoving his friends hand away, “I won't allow myself any more.”
-
“I swear to God if he isn't back by tonight I'm throwing the largest search party in history and once I get my hands on him, he better pray to the Gods that I don't, I'll have him on his knees and squirming for mercy, the mercy that I won't give him!”
Eunhyuk leaned back against the trunk of the tree, nodding away at Sungmin's endless ranting.
“You've been saying similar things the past two days,” Zhoumi yawned, “don't you get tired of saying it? We get tired of hearing it.”
Donghae nodded in agreement. “He promised you, didn't he? He'll be back for sure.”
“If he came back last time, he's bound to come back again this time,” Eunhyuk absentmindedly contributed to the conversation.
Sungmin frowned. “He better.”
“You just get more and more attached to him over time, don't you?” Donghae asked, nuzzling himself against Eunhyuk by the tree. “This isn't healthy; you should just pay more attention to yourself. You're skipping meals and neglecting other people because of him!”
“Am not,” Sungmin muttered weakly.
Eunhyuk laughed bitterly. “You can't even speak properly.”
“I can, too!” Sungmin countered. “Argh! Can't you all ease my suffering instead of adding to it? I really don't need anything to be added to my fire!”
Zhoumi shook his head. “Well, the fire can die down soon. I just got a text message from my cousin Hangeng; he says Yesung was just with him but he won't be here to pick you up after school today.”
“I don't like the expression you're wearing,” Donghae narrowed his eyes.
“Of course, there's always a twist,” Zhoumi chuckled.
Eunhyuk sat up. “A missing arm? Maybe a leg? Or is it his head?”
“Not funny,” Sungmin pouted.
“It would be if you didn't have such a long face,” Eunhyuk retorted. “Okay then, Mimi, what's the dilemma?”
Zhoumi shrugged. “I just wanted to mess with Donghae. What could possibly be wrong with him? He's a full grown adult that left for a few days to deal with some business-”
“Shady business,” Eunhyuk corrected.
“Fine,” Zhoumi rolled his eyes, “shady business. It's unlikely that he'd really lose an arm or a leg over it.”
Donghae stretched. “And this is why we never listen to, or ask for, Zhoumi's advice.”
“Agreed,” Eunhyuk nodded.
Sungmin slumped his shoulders, throwing himself back into the grass. He could only hope for the day to hurry and end, a hundred times faster, so he could see Yesung and make sure he really was fine.
When it came to Yesung, he just couldn't be too sure.
-
The first thing Sungmin did when he got home that afternoon was run towards Yesung's room. He didn't even stop to greet his mother, who called out to him after he rushed through the kitchen, while he was on his way.
His eyes were red; not because he was on the verge of tears, not because he was angry, but because he passionately hoped that Yesung would be back by now.
To his dismay, Yesung was not in his room.
“Where is he?!” Sungmin scowled to himself, throwing his backpack to the ground.
His mother peered in through the doors, witnessing her son pacing around the room in a nervous wreck. “He's-”
“Not here,” Sungmin interrupted, “I know.”
She shook her head with a small smile. “If you-”
“I've tried calling him, he hasn't picked up.”
“Will you just-”
“Mom, I'm not in the mood right now,” Sungmin growled.
Mrs. Lee rose a brow, clapping her hands together. “I was going to tell you that if you went to your own room, there's a big surprise waiting for you. Apparently, trying to be nice doesn't pay when it comes to your own children.”
“I don't want a present,” Sungmin grumbled, not getting the hint.
“Fine then,” Mrs. Lee said, giving up on her son, “I thought you were brighter than that, but I guess not. Giving birth to BBQ would be better than you, at least I could eat it! All I can do with you is let you push me around and-”
Sungmin sighed. “Mother, I'm sorry, that's not what I meant.”
“Yeah, sure,” his mom groaned, “I'll be in the kitchen if you need me; don't.”
Feeling guilty for his poor attitude, Sungmin picked up his bag from the ground and moped down the hall to his own room. After throwing the door open, he threw his backpack to the side and headed straight for his dresser.
Routines; he hated them. This was his daily routine: wake up, wash and clean, breakfast, school, change and study, dinner, and sleep. The only thing that went out of routine in his life was Yesung; Yesung and the game that brought them together.
“I'd love to watch you finish your show for me,” a voice coughed from behind Sungmin, “but I don't think that's good work etiquette and I'm not intent on getting fired just yet.”
Sungmin, with his shirt half way over his head, lowered his arms and faced the man laying on his bed. “Yesung? What are you doing here?”
“I said I'd be back, didn't I?”
“I meant what are you doing in my room?!” Sungmin clarified.
Yesung laughed. “I was standing outside your room, waiting for you to come home, but your mom told me to sit inside. I got tired, so, I took a seat on your bed.”
“And I assume you fell asleep?” Sungmin added.
There was a brisk nod from the older man. “Sorry, I know I must have missed quite a few of your calls.”
Relief rushed over Sungmin. He absorbed Yesung's entire being, from head to toe, making sure he was healthy and uninjured; the last thing he needed right now was for Yesung to really be missing an arm or a leg. “You should be,” Sungmin pursed his lips, pulling his shirt down over his torso, “I was worried sick about you.”
“I'm sorry,” Yesung repeated, yawning. He then realized he was still sitting in Sungmin's bed and was about to hop out of it, but Sungmin had already reached his side and motioned for him to stay put.
Sungmin held a hand over Yesung's, his foxy eyes staring intently into the older man's glass-like ones. “You're going to stay this time, right? You're not going to leave anymore?”
“I'm pretty sure that's not what I sai-”
“I don't care what you said,” Sungmin interjected, “I want you to tell me right now.”
Yesung smiled, shaking his head lightly. “I can't promise you anything, Sungmin, but I can reassure you that I will always, always, stay by your side.”
“What's the difference?” Sungmin asked.
It was a question that was hard for Yesung to explain. Yesung lifted a hand to Sungmin's cheek, cradling it in his palm. “What's the difference from being the place I return to and being a place I run after?”
“You-”
“My reply is the same,” Yesung smiled warmly, the first affectionate smile Sungmin saw from the older man, “a promise is just words, an empty shell, something that can be broken. Reassurance, however, if proof that I'm willing to keep my word.”
Yesung released Sungmin and tried to inch himself off of the bed. Sungmin held him in place, pushing him back against the bed so he was laying down and leaning close to his face. “You said it yourself,” Sungmin confirmed once again, “you'll always be with me, me, right?”
“Sungmin, do you know what your problem is?” Yesung asked, locking his hands underneath his head as he smirked up at Sungmin. Sungmin pulled away slightly, peering into Yesung's eyes as he shook his head. “You want to be my first, my foremost, my everything. Don't you know? What's important isn't being any man's first, but their last.”
Sungmin released his grip on Yesung and contemplated the matter seriously. Yesung sighed, hoping the younger man would just take his word for it.
When, after a few moments, there was no reaction, Yesung took it upon himself to garner a different type of reaction from the boy. He took Sungmin by the neck and pulled him down, forcing their lips to meet roughly.
There was no time for Sungmin to think, neither was there time for him to fight back, before he found himself lost in Yesung's touch, his lips, his warmth, his passion, and most importantly, his eyes. Those eyes Sungmin just couldn't resist.
As Sungmin slowly came back to reality, he thumped a fist hard against Yesung's chest. Yesung immediately released Sungmin again, coughing against the younger man's lips.
“What was that for?” Yesung asked, patting his chest.
Sungmin fought back a blush, “what was that for?!”
“What do you want from me, Sungmin? You want me to notice you, you want me to pay attention to you, you tell me things that one would tell the person they truly care for,” Yesung asked, “now that I'm giving you the attention you've been craving from me, you don't want it?”
“What's your problem?” Sungmin scolded, shoving Yesung lately. “Why are you acting so weird and forceful? You're not usually like this.”
Yesung sat up, straightening out his clothes. “You're right. I'm sorry, I should just go-”
“No!” Sungmin shouted, wrapping his fingers around Yesung's wrist. “Tell me, what's wrong? Did something happen? Why are you acting different? What's the problem?”
Flinging Sungmin's hand off, each finger of the boy's adding just that more heat to his already warming flesh, Yesung shifted himself to face Sungmin. “You. You're the problem, Sungmin. I don't know what else can be wrong, other than you being in my life now. Do you know where I went?”
Sungmin shook his head.
“I put my life on the line,” Yesung laughed bitterly, “but, you know, I don't think that matters as much as the fact that, while I was there, I couldn't care less about the lives of anyone else around me. You know why?”
Sungmin wove his fingers into Yesung's hand, giving it a small squeeze as he shook his head again.
Yesung lowered his eyes to their interlocked fingers, raising them to his chest. “Because the only thing I could think about was keeping myself alive so I could come back here; so I could come back to your side, just as I told you I would.”
“Yesung-” Sungmin paused, standing to his feet. “When did I become so important to you?”
“You tell me,” Yesung challenged.
Sungmin fastened his arms around Yesung's neck and pulled him in for a hug, hugging him tight against himself. “I'm sorry,” Sungmin whispered against Yesung's ear, “I'm sorry for bringing so much trouble to your life.”
Yesung shook his head, wrapping his arms around Sungmin's waist and nuzzling into the nape of Sungmin's neck.
Pulling away, Sungmin looked into Yesung's eyes. He felt himself being pulled in, drawn in, as their distance closed and their lips engaged intimately once again. Never had Sungmin felt this way before; the acute need for another man's touch, for another man's breath to mingle with his own, to have another man hold him with possession and passion.
Before either of them realized it, they were both stripped of their only physical preventions from accessing each others sensitivity. Their hands traveled across the smooth surfaces of the other's raw chest, Yesung's lips grazing over every inch of Sungmin's collar to his shoulders.
They were aching, their blood rushing to too many places at once.
Yesung hovered over Sungmin, his abdomen glued to the younger man's bare back, as he snaked an arm around his waist and clutched his side in a bruising grasp. Closer, all Yesung could think about was pulling Sungmin closer, harder, skin tight against his own flesh. There was something about the way Sungmin shook, shivered, tensed, moaned, and cried beneath him that drew Yesung's breath and hitched his desires.
Lust. Perhaps that's what drove him right now; if it was, it was doing a good job because he knew he was being driven insane by this lust, by Sungmin.
It hurt at first. Sungmin was surprised by the sharp pain, Yesung piercing through him slowly but roughly. He never imagined it could hurt so much.
Gripping his sheets and shoving his face into his pillow, trying to muffle his scream, Sungmin couldn't figure out what there was he could do to make the pain go away. Yesung bit down on his bottom lip, resting his forehead on the back of Sungmin shoulder, as he slid his hands on top of Sungmin's and held them tightly.
He didn't want to hurt the younger boy.
“It's okay,” Sungmin breathed heavily, reaching back and weaving his fingers into Yesung's hair, “I'm fine.”
Without further adieu, Yesung continued his ministrations until the subtle gasps of pain from the younger boy were of pleasure and satisfaction. Picking up his pace, as well as pressure, Yesung made the night an unforgettable one for the both of them.
“You're my first,” Sungmin whispered against Yesung's ear later that night.
Yesung stirred in the midst of his nap, throwing an arm over Sungmin and tugging him close. “You're my last,” Yesung replied, kissing Sungmin gently on his temple.
Sungmin smiled; this was probably the happiest he had ever been in his life.
Any doubt Sungmin had for Yesung vanished into thin air with those simple words. All the boy could think about was holding Yesung, holding onto the older man with his life, because Yesung never made promises, Yesung made reassurances.
Sungmin was sure, he was somehow so certain, that Yesung would hold on to him like he did today; with passion, with obsession, until the day they died.
Perhaps because Sungmin was all Yesung had now.
Until there was no room left for a shadow of a doubt that Sungmin was loved, loved by Yesung, this was a game they would keep playing. A game that lasts a lifetime.
-----
A/N: I totally forgot I planned for this to be rated M.. and because I've been writing so much for a certain someone lately, I really didn't include much of it, so, here it is. lol. I really suck at smut. Sorry. I know it's been forever since I last updated... I'm sure everyone knows the jazz; college sucks and I've been really, really sick. Anyhow, I hope you guys liked the ending! A bit abrupt, I know, but things never go the way I plan. =/ Till next time! <3