(no subject)
>>WHEN WE GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH............
>>
>> 1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE IS.
>>
>> 2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING OUR
>> BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
>>
>> 3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S ASS AND
>> HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
>>
>> 4. IN OUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, WE REALIZE THAT WE NOW LOOK MORE LIKE A
>> HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS WE WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.
>>
>> 5. WE DROP OUR 3:00 A.M. SUBMARINE SANDWICH ON THE FLOOR (WHICH WE'RE
>> EATING EVEN THOUGH WE ARE NOT THE LEAST BIT HUNGRY), PICK IT UP AND
>> CARRY ON EATING IT
>>
>> 6.WE START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE WE SEE THAT WE LOVE THEM
>> SOOOOO MUCH.
>>
>> 7. WE GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW
>> SONG PLAYS BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!"
>>
>> 8. WE'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO US.
>>
>> 9. THE MAN WE'RE FLIRTING WITH USED TO BE OUR 5TH GRADE TEACHER.
>>
>> 10. THE URGE TO TAKE OFF ARTICLES OF CLOTHING, STAND ON A TABLE AND
>> SING OR DANCE BECOMES STRANGELY OVERWHELMING TO US.
>>
>> 11. OUR EYES JUST DON'T SEEM TO WANT TO STAY OPEN ON THEIR OWN SO WE
>> KEEP THEM HALF CLOSED AND THINK IT LOOKS EXOTICALLY SEXY.
>>
>> 12. WE'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.
>>
>> 13. WE YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO WE BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING
>> US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE WE CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE
>> GIN.
>>
>> 14. WE THINK WE ARE IN BED, BUT OUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE
>> KITCHEN FLOOR (er, or, the mop?)
>>
>> 15. WE START EVERY CONVERSATION WITH A BOOMING, "DON'T TAKE THIS THE
>> WRONG WAY BUT..."
>>
>> 16. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.
>>
>> 17. OUR HUGS BEGIN TO RESEMBLE WRESTLING TAKE-DOWN MOVES.
>>
>> 18. WE ARE TIRED SO WE JUST SIT ON THE FLOOR (WHEREVER WE HAPPEN TO
>> BE STANDING) AND TAKE A QUICK NAP. (OR AT A FOOTBALL STADIUM)
>>
>> 19. WE BEGIN LEAVING THE BUTTONS OPEN ON OUR BUTTON FLY PANTS TO CUT
>> DOWN ON THE TIME WE'RE IN THE BATHROOM AWAY FROM OUR DRINK.
>>
>> 20. WE TAKE OUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT'S THEIR FAULT THAT
>> WE'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT.
>>
>> 1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE IS.
>>
>> 2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING OUR
>> BUTT WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
>>
>> 3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S ASS AND
>> HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
>>
>> 4. IN OUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, WE REALIZE THAT WE NOW LOOK MORE LIKE A
>> HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS WE WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.
>>
>> 5. WE DROP OUR 3:00 A.M. SUBMARINE SANDWICH ON THE FLOOR (WHICH WE'RE
>> EATING EVEN THOUGH WE ARE NOT THE LEAST BIT HUNGRY), PICK IT UP AND
>> CARRY ON EATING IT
>>
>> 6.WE START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE WE SEE THAT WE LOVE THEM
>> SOOOOO MUCH.
>>
>> 7. WE GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW
>> SONG PLAYS BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!"
>>
>> 8. WE'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO US.
>>
>> 9. THE MAN WE'RE FLIRTING WITH USED TO BE OUR 5TH GRADE TEACHER.
>>
>> 10. THE URGE TO TAKE OFF ARTICLES OF CLOTHING, STAND ON A TABLE AND
>> SING OR DANCE BECOMES STRANGELY OVERWHELMING TO US.
>>
>> 11. OUR EYES JUST DON'T SEEM TO WANT TO STAY OPEN ON THEIR OWN SO WE
>> KEEP THEM HALF CLOSED AND THINK IT LOOKS EXOTICALLY SEXY.
>>
>> 12. WE'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.
>>
>> 13. WE YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO WE BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING
>> US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE WE CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE
>> GIN.
>>
>> 14. WE THINK WE ARE IN BED, BUT OUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE
>> KITCHEN FLOOR (er, or, the mop?)
>>
>> 15. WE START EVERY CONVERSATION WITH A BOOMING, "DON'T TAKE THIS THE
>> WRONG WAY BUT..."
>>
>> 16. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT.
>>
>> 17. OUR HUGS BEGIN TO RESEMBLE WRESTLING TAKE-DOWN MOVES.
>>
>> 18. WE ARE TIRED SO WE JUST SIT ON THE FLOOR (WHEREVER WE HAPPEN TO
>> BE STANDING) AND TAKE A QUICK NAP. (OR AT A FOOTBALL STADIUM)
>>
>> 19. WE BEGIN LEAVING THE BUTTONS OPEN ON OUR BUTTON FLY PANTS TO CUT
>> DOWN ON THE TIME WE'RE IN THE BATHROOM AWAY FROM OUR DRINK.
>>
>> 20. WE TAKE OUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT'S THEIR FAULT THAT
>> WE'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT.