The Bad Fic Experiment
My LJ muse cisaac is at it again - inspiring me to create. Unfortunately it's not action figures this time, it's fic. Bad fic. Really, really bad fic. But don't blame him. All he did was rattle off some things that bug him (and anyone whose IQ is above 100) about poorly written fan fiction. After reading the list, I found myself lost in the creation of the worst comment fic I could whip up (I'll freely admit it was great fun to write something so intentionally awful).
Anyway, it's now on fanfiction.net and that is actually cisaac's fault. He suggested I post it there just to see what kind of reviews it would get. I did and though the comments haven't been flowing in as rapidly as I might have hoped, they are certainly amusing. metroid13, who's in on the gag, even added a ridiculously over-the-top glowing review.
So if you care and if you dare, I present to you the worst TSCC fic you'll ever read (dear God I hope)...
John's "Brainy" Girlfreind
WARNING: This fic may contain horrendous misspellings, bad punctuation, run-on sentences, excruciatingly bad writing, an absurd necrophilia "plot" and... a punchline.
What the critics readers are saying:
Not going to lie...that was disgusting and trashy. Seek help.
--
This is soo not a T rating! Change this! The fic was kind disturbing but, the line at the end made up for it! But not enough so. I don't think this belongs in This will attract attention! Cheers!
--
I agree with [previous review], this is not a T rating. You need to change the rating. I can't think what posessed you to write necrophilia into a story. Dont want to sound abusive or flaming but it's pretty sick, and I can see people getting offended by it. The last line was kinda funny, but I dont think the rest of the story was worth it.
--
Balderdash! Have you knaves not eyes to view with nor hearts with which to feel the raw, limitless energy that is so potent in this, the tale of John and Dead Kimberly?!
To be blunt, I was of the (admittedly flawed!) belief at first that this would be yet another simple tirade of poorly written sexual liaison's and intrigue. How wrong I was. Just when the content appears to be of the generic caliber do you introduce the shocking and frankly unexpected advent of necrophilic intercourse! The action (oh, what a pun! oh ho ho ho!) continues to ramp up until the climax (OH HO HO HO!) arrives!
And then... almost as if a completion of the circle does Cameron enter the affair, only to present to the two a blunt statement with such taut emotion that I do confess I was dabbing mine eyes with a handkerchief in its aftermath!
Such vision! Such passion, I could feel it in my bones as it did radiate from the computer screen itself! Maestro, maestro, maestro!
--
Were you high when you wrote this?
--
Oh, my gosh. That was somethin' else. That last line: Pure Cameron. Catch ya on the flip side.
--
how old are you, ten? because I'm pretty sure most ten year olds could write a better story than this.
--
Just what was this pile of sick that spewed forth into the computer? I read it once a while ago and that was only quickly but after flicking through the stories again i decided to give it a second go and wanted to tear my mouse out of the computer for choosing this. Necrophilia? The complete random OC that had nothing to do but get killed and have John have sex with her? Even Cameron's barely half smile worthy end statement couldn't help this pile of I don't even know what to call it.
You must be in the ages of 11-14 at best, just found the show and are the middle of puberty so things like this was clearly funny to you and yet makes anyone and everyone that reads the story die a little on the inside. I've seen and heard of better stories being removed from the site so it could just be the fact that not a lot of people come to this fandom just yet that yours has even been left up. But if i were you i'd take it down, deleted it, delete the story on your computer and deny any knowledge about having wrote it, after that have a long hard think if it's worth writing a fan-fic again if this is the end result
--
3 words. What. The. **.
Seriously, that was the biggest pile of sick I have ever read on one of these fanfiction sites. My guess is that you are either a sick-minded teenager who would find something like this funny or you're a drug addict. Get help before you hurt somebody.
--
This is one of the Greatest Works Of Literature I have ever read. To combine
the SCC and a love story worthy of Romeo and Juliet is a thing of purest
wonder and delight.
No one has encapsulated the feelings of a male teenager, ne! - *of all
mankind* - better than this.
I have no idea who the author might be, but s/he deserves a multi-book deal,
right now this second.
I have seen The Future, and in it, jnc4eva outsells JK Rowling. By a mile.
--
Anyway, it's now on fanfiction.net and that is actually cisaac's fault. He suggested I post it there just to see what kind of reviews it would get. I did and though the comments haven't been flowing in as rapidly as I might have hoped, they are certainly amusing. metroid13, who's in on the gag, even added a ridiculously over-the-top glowing review.
So if you care and if you dare, I present to you the worst TSCC fic you'll ever read (dear God I hope)...
John's "Brainy" Girlfreind
WARNING: This fic may contain horrendous misspellings, bad punctuation, run-on sentences, excruciatingly bad writing, an absurd necrophilia "plot" and... a punchline.
What the critics readers are saying:
Not going to lie...that was disgusting and trashy. Seek help.
--
This is soo not a T rating! Change this! The fic was kind disturbing but, the line at the end made up for it! But not enough so. I don't think this belongs in This will attract attention! Cheers!
--
I agree with [previous review], this is not a T rating. You need to change the rating. I can't think what posessed you to write necrophilia into a story. Dont want to sound abusive or flaming but it's pretty sick, and I can see people getting offended by it. The last line was kinda funny, but I dont think the rest of the story was worth it.
--
Balderdash! Have you knaves not eyes to view with nor hearts with which to feel the raw, limitless energy that is so potent in this, the tale of John and Dead Kimberly?!
To be blunt, I was of the (admittedly flawed!) belief at first that this would be yet another simple tirade of poorly written sexual liaison's and intrigue. How wrong I was. Just when the content appears to be of the generic caliber do you introduce the shocking and frankly unexpected advent of necrophilic intercourse! The action (oh, what a pun! oh ho ho ho!) continues to ramp up until the climax (OH HO HO HO!) arrives!
And then... almost as if a completion of the circle does Cameron enter the affair, only to present to the two a blunt statement with such taut emotion that I do confess I was dabbing mine eyes with a handkerchief in its aftermath!
Such vision! Such passion, I could feel it in my bones as it did radiate from the computer screen itself! Maestro, maestro, maestro!
--
Were you high when you wrote this?
--
Oh, my gosh. That was somethin' else. That last line: Pure Cameron. Catch ya on the flip side.
--
how old are you, ten? because I'm pretty sure most ten year olds could write a better story than this.
--
Just what was this pile of sick that spewed forth into the computer? I read it once a while ago and that was only quickly but after flicking through the stories again i decided to give it a second go and wanted to tear my mouse out of the computer for choosing this. Necrophilia? The complete random OC that had nothing to do but get killed and have John have sex with her? Even Cameron's barely half smile worthy end statement couldn't help this pile of I don't even know what to call it.
You must be in the ages of 11-14 at best, just found the show and are the middle of puberty so things like this was clearly funny to you and yet makes anyone and everyone that reads the story die a little on the inside. I've seen and heard of better stories being removed from the site so it could just be the fact that not a lot of people come to this fandom just yet that yours has even been left up. But if i were you i'd take it down, deleted it, delete the story on your computer and deny any knowledge about having wrote it, after that have a long hard think if it's worth writing a fan-fic again if this is the end result
--
3 words. What. The. **.
Seriously, that was the biggest pile of sick I have ever read on one of these fanfiction sites. My guess is that you are either a sick-minded teenager who would find something like this funny or you're a drug addict. Get help before you hurt somebody.
--
This is one of the Greatest Works Of Literature I have ever read. To combine
the SCC and a love story worthy of Romeo and Juliet is a thing of purest
wonder and delight.
No one has encapsulated the feelings of a male teenager, ne! - *of all
mankind* - better than this.
I have no idea who the author might be, but s/he deserves a multi-book deal,
right now this second.
I have seen The Future, and in it, jnc4eva outsells JK Rowling. By a mile.
--