(no subject)
i have two separate topics to write about today. i am never sure whether i should just plop them both in the same entry or do separate ones. for brevity's sake, i will just do one.
UNO:
as you may be able to tell, i survived my yoga class last night, fart-free and loving every minute of it. it was an enjoyable class, but a fight broke out! the teacher was a nice, 20-something guy whose body was pure, lean muscle. that point is neither here nor there, i just thought you'd like to know. at one point, i was in the midst of a pose and all of a sudden felt an unexpected (but not unwelcome; you know it, bitches!) hand on my hip. yoga seems overtly sexual, or maybe that is just my perversion coming through? but he'd say something like "clench your butt, grab it with your hands, and thrust your pelvis forward". um, are you at least going to take me out to dinner first? then he'd say "open your legs and bend your head forward to go between your legs". that deserves a caps lock DIRTY. anyway, it was a great class that was the perfect balance between relaxing, challenging and perverted, and afterwards my body felt all tingly and like jello. even today i feel a bit sore, but it's a good feeling.
but, yeah, a catfight broke out! before class started, this one woman was kind of talkative and loud and was saying how this was her first yoga class and how she really wanted to lose her belly. so about an hour into the class, she blurts out "is this supposed to be a beginners class? it's too hard" and then was like "i want a refund but won't be able to get it" and she was pissed off. the yoga teacher guy was like "thank you for asserting yourself" (totally yoga teacher speech, eh?) and then was like "thank you for telling me these thoughts IN class, that was very THOUGHTFUL of you" in a really sarcastic voice. afterwards, he asked to speak with her outside of the class. i was packing up and heard them totally yelling at each other in the hallway. it was pretty much the antithesis of everything that yoga is supposed to be. i left before the argument was over, but i think he was banning her from ever returning.
hip-touching, lean-muscled yoga teacher: 1.
belly-losing, pissed-off lady: 0.
DOS:
so we've been having a flux of centipede sightings in our apartment lately, mostly on the same wall near the couch. i thought it had something to do with the cooling temperatures. maybe the centipedes were coming in from outside for the Winter? but this morning TSM emailed me and said that he looked near our palm tree plant when he got up this morning, and saw one near the base of it and then looked inside and saw MULTIPLE CENTIPEDES IN THE PLANT. like, over 10. we bought the plant at Ikea back in May, but maybe - and i have shivers down my spine as i write this - their eggs or whatever centipedes GROW OUT OF, are starting to hatch? or something? needless to say, i am skeeved out by all of this. TSM put the plant on our balcony and will try to come up with a solution this afternoon. but isn't that gross? all of the inner peace i grew last night has now been entirely corrupted.
UNO:
as you may be able to tell, i survived my yoga class last night, fart-free and loving every minute of it. it was an enjoyable class, but a fight broke out! the teacher was a nice, 20-something guy whose body was pure, lean muscle. that point is neither here nor there, i just thought you'd like to know. at one point, i was in the midst of a pose and all of a sudden felt an unexpected (but not unwelcome; you know it, bitches!) hand on my hip. yoga seems overtly sexual, or maybe that is just my perversion coming through? but he'd say something like "clench your butt, grab it with your hands, and thrust your pelvis forward". um, are you at least going to take me out to dinner first? then he'd say "open your legs and bend your head forward to go between your legs". that deserves a caps lock DIRTY. anyway, it was a great class that was the perfect balance between relaxing, challenging and perverted, and afterwards my body felt all tingly and like jello. even today i feel a bit sore, but it's a good feeling.
but, yeah, a catfight broke out! before class started, this one woman was kind of talkative and loud and was saying how this was her first yoga class and how she really wanted to lose her belly. so about an hour into the class, she blurts out "is this supposed to be a beginners class? it's too hard" and then was like "i want a refund but won't be able to get it" and she was pissed off. the yoga teacher guy was like "thank you for asserting yourself" (totally yoga teacher speech, eh?) and then was like "thank you for telling me these thoughts IN class, that was very THOUGHTFUL of you" in a really sarcastic voice. afterwards, he asked to speak with her outside of the class. i was packing up and heard them totally yelling at each other in the hallway. it was pretty much the antithesis of everything that yoga is supposed to be. i left before the argument was over, but i think he was banning her from ever returning.
hip-touching, lean-muscled yoga teacher: 1.
belly-losing, pissed-off lady: 0.
DOS:
so we've been having a flux of centipede sightings in our apartment lately, mostly on the same wall near the couch. i thought it had something to do with the cooling temperatures. maybe the centipedes were coming in from outside for the Winter? but this morning TSM emailed me and said that he looked near our palm tree plant when he got up this morning, and saw one near the base of it and then looked inside and saw MULTIPLE CENTIPEDES IN THE PLANT. like, over 10. we bought the plant at Ikea back in May, but maybe - and i have shivers down my spine as i write this - their eggs or whatever centipedes GROW OUT OF, are starting to hatch? or something? needless to say, i am skeeved out by all of this. TSM put the plant on our balcony and will try to come up with a solution this afternoon. but isn't that gross? all of the inner peace i grew last night has now been entirely corrupted.